“I’m going to vomit,” I told Piper as she pushed me towards the front door of Lucien’s guest cottage. We’d walked here, enjoying the warm weather and sunshine, but the sun was beginning to set and we’d be expected at dinner soon. I needed to ask Lucien to apologize publicly to Marcelle for the Great Freeze and I felt sick about it. He was king, and asking a king to do anything was… bad mannered.
“You’re his betrothed and future queen. You want what is best for him and the realm,” Piper reminded me.
I nodded, letting out a shaky breath, and smoothed my palms over my emerald green dress. The neckline was definitely a little more scandalous than appropriate, but dressing stuffy like my mother never suited me, and Lucien didn’t seem to mind.
Reaching up, I knocked at the door.
A moment ticked by, then another. I looked at Piper, wondering what was taking so long, when the door opened.
An audible gasp left my throat when I gazed upon Lucien’s bare chest. Beads of water ran down his neck, rolling over each defined ab muscle before hitting the band of his trousers.
His hair was wet and he was drying it with a towel as his eyes raked over my dress. It was as if I could physically feel his gaze caressing me and it sent a warm zap of energy down my back. Averting my eyes, I held up a hand. “I’m so sorry,” I said.
Lucien chuckled deeply. “If you’re this shy with me tunicless, how will you feel when we finally make children?”
“Lucien!” I scolded him, turning to face him with an angry snarl.
But he was grinning, and I hated that he was enjoying ruffling my feathers.
“I need to speak with you. Can you please put some clothes on?” I asked him.
“You look beautiful. Let’s skip dinner with Prince Haze and have dinner here together, just you and I,” he said suddenly.
I swallowed hard, wanting to look at Piper for advice, but she’d scurried away and was now standing too far away in the courtyard, unable to hear us.
“Tunic please,” I said again.
Maker, please put on a tunic before I beg Piper to leave so I can go inside alone.
He left the door open and stepped inside. I was surprised to see that there was no palace staff. His servants were gone and it seemed to just be him. When he came back out, he wore a black and silver silk tunic that matched his eyes.
“You look handsome,” I told him shyly, figuring I would return his earlier compliment.
He smiled, his eyes smoldering as he looked at me. “Does that mean we will be bedding for more than just making children?”
“Lucien Thorne!” I reached out and smacked his chest, aghast at his inappropriate humor.
He caught my hand and pulled it to his lips, kissing the top. “I’m sorry, you’re an easy target, sugar plum.”
I scoffed at the pet name and tried to remember why I was here. He was still holding my hand; the spot he had kissed was tingling, sending waves of warmth into my gut. I couldn’t tell if I hated his vulgar humor or liked it.
“You’re blushing,” he said.
“I’m warm!” I snapped, and pulled my hand back. “Let’s take a walk.” I moved outside into the courtyard. Piper moved as well, finding a small bench near the rose bushes to sit down on but still have view of us. Lucien stepped into the open air and squinted at the sun. It cast shadows on his pale skin, and a little bead of sweat formed on his upper lip.
I giggled. “You can’t wait to get back to Winter Court, can you?”
He looked over at me. “Far too much sunshine for my liking. Would it kill him to pull some clouds over it for our visit?”
“The lack of a breeze is killing me! Who wants stagnant warm air?” I joined in his complaint and pulled at my dress to indicate how stifling I was.
Lucien stopped in front of me and looked down. We’d barely had time to be together as just us, and I realized now how tall he was. Most fae were tall—I certainly was—but Lucien was a head taller than me and I had to crane my neck to stare up at him.
“What do you want?” Lucien asked pointedly.
I shook myself, mouth popping open in shock. “Excuse me?”
Lucien smiled. “You did not drop by before dinner dressed as dessert so that we could arrive together. You want something. Just tell me what it is so that I can give it to you.”
Dressed as dessert. I wasn’t even going to reprimand that comment, it was far too clever and I was starting to think Lucien wouldn’t stop either way. Truth be told, I was starting to like the way he spoke to me. It was flattering, and made me feel beautiful and wanted.
“I had a little chat about the separation with Prince Haze upon my arrival,” I started.
Lucien’s face instantly went rigid. “Were you able to talk any sense into the buffoon?”
I blew air out through my teeth. “I tried. I told him that if he separated and we fought the queen, she would pick him off last and he wouldn’t have your protection.”
Lucien looked impressed by that answer. It was after all a play on his own answer to me.
Reaching out, I grasped his forearm. “But, Lucien, he doesn’t see you as a reasonable man. All Summer Court sees are the graves they walk by each day and the lingering silence from you on what happened during the Great Freeze.”
Lucien yanked his hand away from mine as if I’d burned him, and then he turned, giving me his back. The temperature plummeted suddenly, and although I was grateful for the reprieve in heat, I knew it was because he was upset. I walked around him and got right up in his face, forcing him to look at me.
“You never even said sorry. You didn’t send a letter, just a bag of gold, which was an insult with no note to accompany it.” My voice cracked as I thought of the night my grandmother died. “You are our king, our protector, and in one night you took people from us without a word of why.”
The strangled sound of pure grief that ripped from his throat constricted my heart. He staggered backwards, clutching his chest as if I’d stabbed him. I couldn’t believe that this entire time I thought him to be a cold monster who didn’t care for anyone. Simply hearing my words had affected him so deeply and I regretted how hard I’d been with his pain. Rushing forward, I grasped his hands, pulling them to my stomach.
“I’m sorry. I was merely trying to get you to see how the others view you. How the silence has fed their hatred of you and therefore their desire to separate.” I felt ashamed for causing this much emotion in him right before a big dinner with the prince of Summer. Had I known how deeply it would affect him, I never would have brought it up.
Lucien blinked rapidly and then cleared his throat. “I wrote a realm-wide letter a thousand times,” he said, “but no words could do justice in explaining my actions. No words would give peace to those who had lost someone at my hand. No one wants excuses, they want their family member back.”
“So you sent gold instead?” I asked him. The next day each court had gotten a little sack of gold for “damages.” It looked callous. Sorry for the death and destruction, here is some coin.
He sighed. “I was young, without a mother for guidance. I didn’t know how to handle it.”
Reaching up, I tilted his chin down with my fingers to force him to look at me. “You’re older now, Lucien. I think it’s time for an apology—and an explanation of what happened that night.”
He bristled, staring into my eyes with an unknown depth. There was so much pain there, and yet I saw anger too, like roiling clouds in a thunderstorm. What had happened that night? It was a few months after his mother’s death, so I knew it couldn’t have been solely that.
“I cannot explain, but if you think it will help I can apologize,” he said, and then his eyes dropped to my lips.
“I think it would help.” My fingers were still on his chiseled jaw, and I licked my lips, my chest heaving as I imagined what it would be like to kiss him.
Kissing a classmate behind school was one thing, but kissing a king in a courtship was another. It wasn’t done—not that I thought Lucien would mind breaking a modesty rule. Surely not in full view of the Summer courtiers! Protocol stated we would have our first kiss at the altar, before the Maker and our people.
Pulling my hand away from him, I stepped back and released a breath. Lucien cocked a smile and I glared at him. “What’s so funny?”
Lucien leaned forward, whispering into my ear. “Watching you wrestle with how much you want me brings me great satisfaction.”
Heat flushed through my entire body at that. I scoffed, “You think too highly of yourself.” But I felt caught. I felt like maybe I wasn’t hiding my thoughts as well as I hoped.
Lucien reached out and pulled a stray chunk of red hair behind my ear. “No, my sugar plum. I think too highly of you.”
A full body flush hit me again then, and dammit he saw, because he grinned wider. Being a redhead meant that my fair skin flushed at the slightest chance, and now I knew I would never be able to conceal my thoughts around him.
I changed the subject. “Let’s go to dinner, shall we?”
He nodded. “We shall.”
Extending his arm, he hooked mine into the crook of his elbow and then looked back at Piper. “Best you come along, we don’t want the rumor mill starting that Madelynn and I actually like each other,” Lucien told her.
Piper grinned at the king. “A love marriage would be a scandal,” she agreed as she tucked her book under her arm and walked a few feet behind us.
I loved that he got along with Piper. I loved that he was saying sinfully sexy things to me at every turn, and I loved that he’d taken my advice to heart and agreed to apologize tonight at dinner. The more I got to know Lucien Thorne, the more I loved.
OH HADES. When we stepped into the dining hall my stomach dropped. It wasn’t an intimate dinner with Marcelle and a few of his closest advisors. There were over a hundred courtiers in here, and each and every one was sending a frosty glare at Lucien.
He did this on purpose.
Prince Haze invited as many people as possible to make Lucien and I feel alienated.
I turned to Lucien before Prince Haze could reach us. “I didn’t realize there would be so many people. You don’t have to go ahead with the planned apology in front of so many.”
Lucien looked out across the room and then back to me. “No. It’s okay. I think you’re right. My silence and space have done more harm than intended. The more the better, so that Marcelle cannot change my words with rumors.”
I swallowed hard, nerves clenching my gut. He was right. More witnesses meant less chance of a rumor changing his words, but also more people who could heckle him.
Marcelle had reached us and I plastered a smile on my face.
“My king.” Marcelle’s voice was thick with disdain as he bowed minimally to Lucien.
“Marcelle.” Lucien dropped the title from his name, and of course did not return the bow.
Marcelle looked annoyed but brushed it off. “Princess Madelynn, a pleasure.” He bowed to me, his earlier flirtiness gone. He wouldn’t dare try that in front of Lucien. “Come have a seat, let’s celebrate your betrothal.” Marcelle pointed to two empty chairs at the main table in the middle of the room.
There were seven tables in all, each one holding ten to twenty people. The tables were filled with an assortment of food and drink and everyone was chatting animatedly. I was shocked he’d been able to put on such a large dinner last minute.
“I would like a third seat for my lady-in-waiting.” I gestured to Piper, who stood beside me. She hated these events and she would kill me if I forced her to sit all night next to a bunch of people she didn’t know.
“Of course.” Prince Marcelle kindly asked a woman to move seats, and then Lucien, Piper, and I took our chairs.
Lucien sat at the head of the table, a place protocol dictated he take. I sat to his left, with Piper next to me, and Marcelle sat to his right across from me.
We were served an elegant meal of glazed duck and roasted yams, but it was hard for me to enjoy the food. I kept sneaking nervous glances at Lucien, wondering when he was going to give his public apology. If he was nervous, it didn’t show. He sat with a straight back, gazing stonily at the people around him with little emotion.
“When is the wedding?” Marcelle asked.
Lucien’s gaze flicked to the Summer prince. “Well now, that depends on if I have to deal with your little separation, now doesn’t it?” Lucien said under his breath, just loud enough for Marcelle and I to hear.
Marcelle popped a chunk of sweet potato into his mouth and chewed, watching Lucien like a hawk watched a snake. “Oh, you will have to deal with it. Quite soon too. But I hope we can remain allies—”
Lucien’s dinner fork stabbed his yam violently, causing the plate to crack in half. He let go of the handle, the fork sticking up straight as people looked over at him to see what the commotion was about.
Lucien then leaned forward, into Marcelle. “You will separate my kingdom over my dead body, Marcelle.”
Marcelle grinned. “That can be arranged too.”
I gasped at the treasonous comment. The temperature in the room dropped suddenly.
No. No. No.
This wasn’t going to endear the Summer people to the winter king. Reaching under the table, I dragged my hand across Lucien’s thigh and squeezed it. The coldness in the air left us quickly and he turned to face me.
“Is there something you wanted to say, sugar plum?” he asked sweetly.
Marcelle glared at Lucien and the endearing way in which he spoke to me.
“Actually, I thought now might be a good time for you to give a speech. It’s been a long time since the people of Summer have seen their king.” I gave a nervous laugh.
Now or never. He needed to apologize or we were better off leaving the dinner early. I pleaded with him with my eyes, then a warm hand brushed over mine, reminding me that I was still clutching his thigh. His fingers stroked the top of mine and I forgot to breathe. Releasing his thigh, I pulled my hand back, swallowing hard, and Lucien grinned.
Clearing his throat, he stood and grabbed his spoon, clanging it against his glass. Everyone quieted, looking over at him.
My hands reached under the table to find Piper’s and we clutched each other tightly, knowing what was coming.
Lucien gave a winning smile to the room, which only increased his handsomeness, and cleared his throat. “Thank you to Prince Haze and the people of Summer Court for celebrating my betrothal to Princess Madelynn.”
Everyone clapped politely and then went back to eating. Lucien cleared his throat louder and everyone quieted again, looking over at him with furrowed brows. Lucien gazed at me. “My future queen has already made a lasting impression on me and made me want to be a better man. To right my wrongs…” he said, and my heart constricted. Piper squeezed my hand and I gripped hers right back.
Who knew that Lucien Thorne would be the most romantic man I’d ever met?
“The truth is, I made a mistake in being silent and staying away all these years since the Great Freeze,” he stated, and people started to murmur to each other.
“What is he doing?” Marcelle whispered to me. I ignored him.
“I made a mistake,” Lucien said. “It was an accident that I greatly regret. Not a night passes that I don’t have to live with the remorse. I am sorry.” He held his hand over his heart and glanced out at the room. Tears filled my eyes at his heartfelt apology. It was much more than I had expected and anyone could see how genuine it was.
The murmurs grew louder, and finally an older woman stood and pointed at him. “Accidents with controlling your magic happen, but you didn’t even send a letter explaining why. I buried my husband,” she roared, “and now I have to bow to his killer just because he is my king!”
I gasped at the woman’s sharp words. Lucien flinched as if they’d cut him. A few others murmured their agreements, and pretty soon the entire room was shouting at the king.
Oh Maker, this was not what I’d intended.
I peered at Marcelle, who looked positively delighted with the turn of events, and panic started to rise up in me.
The winter king stepped away from the table and walked over to the woman as every single person in the room went stock still.
Don’t hurt her, I prayed to the Maker. I didn’t know Lucien well enough to tell what he would do. But he did have a temper and she’d just screamed at him. I was clenching Piper’s hand so tightly that it probably hurt, but I couldn’t move.
When Lucien finally stood before the woman, we all watched in fear for what he might do. Marcelle’s fingers twitched as if he was ready to use magic against his own king any moment.
But what Lucien did next caused the tears to spill over onto my cheeks.
He knelt before her, resting on his knee and bowing his head deeply. “I bow to you now, my lady. Please accept my humble apology. I was a young boy with too much power and no control. I didn’t think in your grief that you would want to hear the excuses of that young boy in a letter, or to see his face, so I just stayed away.”
The woman’s bottom lip quivered as she stared down at the winter king kneeling on one knee before her. She looked to be in shock. Her eyes misted over and she swallowed hard.
After a few moments, she tapped his shoulder. He glanced up at her and then she leaned in and whispered something in his ear. I couldn’t hear it from here, but it caused him to rise, and they embraced.
It was a beautiful moment, the best I could have hoped for, and I wished he’d done the same in my court and in Spring.
I looked over at Piper and smiled.
“No!” Marcelle slammed his fist on the table, causing my glass to fall over and gush water on my plate. Marcelle stood, and the room was suddenly sweltering with heat. “You’re going to listen to the carefully orchestrated lies of this madman!” Marcelle screamed to his people. “He admits he lost control. You want to follow a king who can’t even control his power? What happens the next time he gets mad? We have an eternal winter? More die!” Some of the Summer people nodded in agreement, but the majority kept silent.
Lucien looked like he’d been slapped. Here he was giving a genuine apology, confronting his demons, which I’d asked him to do, and Marcelle was twisting it.
“He’s not my king,” Marcelle said boldly, and tipped his chin high.
That’s when a torrent of rage exploded within me.
“How dare you!” I shouted, standing so fast that the chair I had been sitting in fell backwards. The window at the far end of the room shattered and a strong wind burst into the room, throwing all of the flowers and light cloth napkins into the air. People gasped and watched in shock as I pulled a small wind tunnel around Marcelle. “You will not disrespect the king like that and live,” I declared. “What you have said is treason! You have forgotten your place, Marcelle Haze!”
My words mixed with the wind, making them sound thunderous as they moved around the room. Marcelle looked genuinely terrified, realizing he’d gone too far. It made me wonder how often he spoke like this, to let it slip before the king himself. This was the making of an uprising. No wonder he wanted to separate the realms. The difference between Lucien and I was that I had complete control over my power. This little display was on purpose, and I wanted every single person present to know it. The wind funnel followed Marcelle as he backed up, his hair and clothing being tossed around him.
“Kneel and pledge your loyalty to Lucien Thorne, king of Winter, leader of Thorngate and of all fae,” I seethed, “or I will tear the skin from your body layer by layer.”
Gasps of shock filled the room. I no longer cared that this wasn’t proper behavior for a lady. Lucien wasn’t perfect but he was our leader, our king, and to disrespect him in front of a room of courtiers like that was not something I would stand for. Lucien suddenly appeared beside me, standing before Marcelle.
I had no idea what he thought of my current behavior and I didn’t care. Marcelle would kneel or I was well within my right to prosecute him for treason.
Marcelle looked to me, then to the king, and he fell to one knee, bowing his head deeply. Relief rushed through me and I stopped the wind all at once and it became eerily silent.
“Forgive me, King. I drank too much wine and forgot my place,” Marcelle said, his voice shaking a little. He’d had no wine.
Lucien stared at Marcelle on his knee, head bowed, and said nothing for a full minute. It was as if he was soaking the moment in. No one in the room moved. We were all waiting to hear the fate of the man who’d just spoken such treasonous words.
“You may rise and keep your life,” Lucien said, and the courtiers around us sighed in relief.
I was angry for a moment with that decision, but then I realized Lucien was playing a longer game here, to win the hearts of the Summer Court. If he had killed Marcelle it would have squashed the separation petition, but an uprising would happen eventually. They would hate him even more.
Lucien turned to the crowd and then looked at me. “I’m quite a lucky man, am I not? To have a woman fight for respect on my behalf?”
The room chuckled nervously at the topic change and the tension broke. Some women smiled adoringly at us, and the men nodded their agreement with Lucien. Then Lucien hooked arms with mine. “We will leave you now, but we hope to see you at our wedding.” We both spun, and together walked quickly out of the room, with Piper trailing behind.
My heart was in my throat the entire walk through the palace. There were servants down every hallway so I couldn’t say a word or ask him anything in private. I was nearly shaking by the time we reached his front doorstep tucked into the garden with the night sky around us.
Would he be mad? Had I completely overstepped? Did he hate me for sticking up for him when he so clearly could do it himself? Had I made him look weak?
Piper was in the garden sitting on the bench under the moonlight, and we were finally alone. I looked up at Lucien, hoping he would just say something, anything. But he just watched me with those stormy gray eyes.
“My king, I’m sorry if—” My words were cut off when his lips pressed against mine. I gasped and he swallowed the sound. His hands came up to cup my face and my shock gave way to desire. My lips parted and he inserted his tongue, causing me to moan. One second I was standing in front of the door and then next he spun, moving me so that my back was pressed against the door. His thumb trailed down my neck as our tongues stroked each other. Heat traveled down my chest and settled between my legs. I never wanted this kiss to stop. It was raw and full of passion, in a way I’d never felt before outside of my beloved romance novels.
This kiss said I approve of what you did.
It said I appreciate you.
It said thank you.
It said so much more.
Kissing a man like Lucien Thorne was nothing like kissing the boys behind school. This kiss promised that one day when we bedded, there would be more where that came from. There would be pleasure for both of us.
When he finally pulled back, I was panting. I hated that he’d stopped, but also I was grateful. I was not sure I ever would have, and Piper was a rule breaker, so she would let it go on forever. But if we were seen it would tarnish my reputation and he knew that.
He was lightly holding my throat, his lips glistening with my saliva when he leaned in and whispered into my ear: “Had I known you kissed like that, I would have doubled your dowry.”
I grinned at the compliment as he pulled away from me.
“Well, goodnight,” I said stupidly, my mind still on his tongue and how he tasted and smelled and felt.
I turned to go get Piper for our walk back to our room.
“Madelynn,” he called, and I spun to face him, still breathless. “Would you have killed Marcelle?”
His question shocked me, but not more than the answer. Lucien had poured his heart out in front of a room full of strangers. He’d humbled himself before that widow and bowed to her. And Marcelle ruined it.
“Yes,” I said honestly, and then turned before I could see the response on his face.
I didn’t want to know if he was disappointed or delighted with my answer. Though I believed I knew Lucien well enough now to know it was the latter.
