The doorman stops me before I enter the bar and looks at me apologetically. “I’m sorry miss, we don’t allow anyone in with trainers on. Our dress code is smart casual.”
I look down at my outfit. I threw on jeans with a black tee and my trusty old converse. I probably look like a teenager trying to sneak in.
I stare at the intricate logo of the hotel and rummage through my bag to find my wallet. I fish out the black card Daniel gave me and show it to him.
“Does this help?” I ask him. He stares at it and speaks into his headphone quietly. Within a minute someone comes running up with a tablet that has an inbuilt card reader. He swipes the card and stares at the screen in disbelief for a couple of seconds before he hands it back to me. I’m oddly nervous. What if it shows Daniel’s name and they think I stole the card?
The man hands me my card back with two hands, as though it’s precious. “I apologise, Mrs. Devereaux,” he says, bowing his head. I blink in surprise. Mrs. Devereaux? I bite back my smile. The sound of that gives me butterflies. I guess the system shows that I’m Daniel’s wife.
“Please show the card to the bartender as well. He’ll put all your drinks and anything else you wish to consume on your tab. Our kitchen is also at your disposal should you wish to have a late dinner.”
I glance at my watch and frown. It’s almost 10pm. Surely their kitchen is closed now? I thank the doorman and enter. I walk to the end of the room and find Dominic sitting in our usual spot. I smile at the bartender and order myself a cup of tea and Dominic some water. He looks at me with raised brows but nods nonetheless.
“You’re here,” Dominic says. He smiles and his eyes light up. I’m surprised when the sight that used to make me feel all giddy doesn’t even stir my heart.
“You look like shit, Nic.” His eyes are red and tired. Looks like he hasn’t been sleeping much.
Dominic looks at me and laughs. “I missed you,” he murmurs.
“You saw me a few days ago.”
He shakes his head. “No, I mean, I’ve missed you these last few months. We’ve barely spoken and I know it’s my fault.”
I sit in silence. I don’t know how to respond to that. I don’t want to agree with him, because I don’t want to make him feel even worse, but it’s true. He hasn’t been there, even when he was physically present.
“So what happened?” I ask.
Dominic sips the water I gave him and looks away. “She’s really insecure and keeps accusing me of cheating when I’ve been nothing but loyal. But then she’ll ogle Daniel all the time. She’s been to our house every day that he was there, always hanging around him and trying to talk to him. I’ve seen the way she looks at him. The way you both look at him. I mean yeah, he’s so much more muscular than me, but then she’s my girlfriend, you know? She hasn’t come over the last few weekends, and it just so happens to coincide with me telling her Daniel moved out. I thought maybe she was just insecure about you being there, but I didn’t actually tell her you moved out too.”
I’m at a loss for words. I also thought she was far too interested in Daniel and I didn’t like the way she looked at him, but I thought maybe I was being possessive, that it might’ve been in my head.
“Do you think things might get better once she feels more secure in your relationship?”
Dominic looks down, dejected. “I don’t know. This is the first time I’ve given a relationship all I could, and it just doesn’t seem like it’s enough. Seems like I’m not enough. I just have this weird feeling. I’m hoping it’s just jealousy. Maybe I’m jealous that she seemed to find Daniel attractive.”
I nod. I usually have great advice for him, but today I truly don’t know what to say.
“Good communication is key, Nic. You should tell her how you feel and explain to her how her behaviour makes you feel. It sounds like you’re already doing all the right things, but maybe you should talk to her more too.”
Dominic looks at me in wonder. “Yeah, you’re probably right.”
It’s almost like he didn’t expect me to give him any advice at all. Surely he doesn’t think I’d drive a wedge between them when he’s already down in the dumps?
“Sometimes I wonder, you know. What if your confession last year hadn’t scared me? What if I hadn’t been so scared to lose you? What if I’d had the courage to love you the way you deserve to be loved?”
I look away. These are words I longed to hear a mere few months ago, but things are different now. The way he treated me after my father died changed the way I feel about him. It made me realise how young and selfish Dominic still is. I doubt I was even in love with him. I guess it was more infatuation than anything else.
“There’s no point in wondering, Nic. I was drunk. I wasn’t even being serious. Besides, I’m married to your brother now. If anything was going to happen between us, it would’ve happened long before I married Daniel. You made the right call. If you and I hooked up, we would’ve both regretted it.”
Dominic looks at me in disbelief. “Surely you don’t actually believe that? Your marriage with Daniel isn’t even real. Three years will be over before you know it. Anything is possible.”
I smile sardonically. Why do I keep being reminded that my marriage with Daniel is only temporary? And why do I hate hearing it so much?
“Even so, I’m married. Daniel and I promised we’d stay faithful during our marriage. I have no intention of breaking my word.”
Dominic looks startled. “Whose idea was that?” he asks, his voice rough.
“Does it matter?”
Dominic crosses his arms and stares me down. “Hell yeah, it matters. My brother can’t keep it in his pants for more than a couple of weeks. Haven’t you seen the countless women he’s always with? All those models and actresses? How long do you think that fidelity bullshit will last? If it was him that suggested it, then that only means one thing. He’s expecting to bed you.”
Dominic looks angry and I’m not sure whether I should be flattered or upset.
“So what?”
He looks at me in disbelief. “What do you mean, so what?”
I shrug. “He’s my husband. So what if he wants to fuck me?”
Dominic’s incredulity makes way for concern. “Lyss, please don’t tell me you and my brother… that you two are… you know.”
I laugh at his awkwardness. He’s never had a problem telling me the ins and outs of his sex life, yet now he can’t get his words out?
“No, we aren’t sleeping together. But yeah, we’re married. We’ll be stuck together for three years. At some point, who knows?”
Dominic shakes his head. “Don’t, Alyssa. Seriously. I love him to bits, but I love you more. He’s been moving from one woman to the other for as long as I can remember. His last long-term relationship was like five or six years ago. He doesn’t do commitment. If you end up sleeping with him, he’ll end up breaking your heart when he moves on to the next girl.”
I bite down on my lip as I consider his words. The romantic in me wants to believe that he’d just been moving from one woman to the other because the one he truly wants wasn’t available. I’m not one to think that I could change a man. I truly believe change comes from within and no external factors can influence it as much as willpower. But still, part of me believes Daniel isn’t the womaniser the world seems to think he is.
“Anyway, we aren’t here to talk about me. We’re here to talk about you.”
Dominic crosses his arms and looks away. I know that look. He’s annoyed with me and he’s going to make sure I know it.
“Come on.” I sigh. “Let’s just get you home.”
