“So what exactly is going on between you and my brother?” Dominic asks.
I balance my phone between my ear and shoulder as I swipe my access card in the lift. Only executive staff have access to the top floor and while I understand the security measure, having to swipe my card every time I get in the lift is pretty annoying.
“Nothing. What do you mean?” I ask. Thankfully, I’m alone in the lift. “Connection might drop. I’m at work now.”
“What, you two don’t go to work together? Why did you move out and move in together if nothing is going on?”
I roll my eyes. “The apartment is just closer to work, that’s all. Things are still the same between me and Daniel. I told you that.”
“Good. Then you won’t be hurt when you see today’s tabloids.”
I freeze. Daniel has been coming home late most of the week since our argument and wasn’t home much at all during the weekend, but I assumed he was just at the office. When he was home, he was quiet and distant. No matter how cheerful I tried to be or how much I tried to make him smile, all I was met with was cold politeness. The politeness hurt more than an argument would have. I’d rather have him shout at me than have him treat me with indifference. He hasn’t even been coming back to have dinner with me. I thought we might have a chance to get closer again last weekend, but he stayed away and only came back to sleep.
I walk into the office to find Luke and Jake grinning down at this week’s tabloids. I grimace at the thought of our old office tradition. For the last couple of years, we’ve always stuck a tabloid photo that was taken the weekend before on Daniel’s office door; the more scandalous the better. We’d usually keep it up for up to a few weeks until another girl inevitably replaced the old one. There hasn’t been a photo on the door for months now, but like Dominic said, he didn’t last long.
I watch as Jake and Luke stick the photo on Daniel’s door. I walk up to it and stare at the photo. He’s with a beautiful woman. Another skinny model, no doubt. She looks familiar, so she must be quite famous. She’s got his suit coat over her shoulders and looks up at him adoringly as he smiles at her. She’s holding on to his arm as he walks her the final few steps to his Aston Martin. Looks like they walked out of a well-known romantic restaurant. It’s also got a waiting list of three months, and I’ve never even been there. I guess that’s how he was spending some of the evenings that he didn’t eat at home.
I wonder if he fucked her. If she’s had what I’ve never had. Did he come home to me after sleeping with someone else? Did he fall asleep in the room across from mine with another woman’s scent still all over him?
“Are you okay?” Kate asks. I blink in surprise and look at her. I struggle to smile and nod at her politely. “Yes, of course. Why wouldn’t I be?”
She glances at the photo and then back at me. “It’s probably some sort of publicity stunt, you know. I bet he was working on some ad with her for Devereaux Inc.”
I laugh. Does she realise how stupid she sounds? Do they look like they’re working on some sort of advert?
“Why would I care what our boss does in his free time?” I snap. I turn and make my way to the bathrooms. I swipe my card to access the executive bathroom. It’s large and has a shower in it as well as a regular toilet and sink, but most importantly, there are no other stalls in here. I lower the toilet lid and sit down on it as the first tear escapes my eyes. I bury my hands in my hair and allow myself a couple of moments of heartache. A couple of moments of my hopes dying.
I was stupid to think that Daniel was different. He’s always shown me exactly who he is. Those photos have always been up. The tradition started when I was still an intern years ago. It continued all the way through when I worked part time during uni and only stopped when my dad passed away. I’ve seen the photo of every single woman he’s been with, so why am I still surprised? I can’t compete with those women, and it seems I couldn’t capture his attention for more than a few weeks, anyway. I’d rather find out now than later.
I pull myself together and fish my eyedrops from my handbag. I’ve spent years wanting to quit and crying in the bathroom because clients were difficult or because my dad was tougher on me than anyone else. I never thought I’d sit here and cry over a man, though. I shake my head at my own foolishness.
By the time I make it back to the office, everyone is dead silent and the photo is gone. Daniel probably came in and ripped it up, though why he tries is beyond me. One of the boys will have a new one printed and stuck on there within the hour.
I sit down and get to work. Daniel made it clear last week that he wanted things between us to go back to what they used to be. I just didn’t listen. I held out hope where there was none. I don’t even understand why I’m so hurt. We were never together. We never even kissed.
I was never this hurt over anything Dominic ever did, so why are things so different with Daniel? Is it because he’s my husband? Is it because I feel possessive?
I print out the timeline and agenda for the meeting with Takuya. Daniel will have to travel to Singapore for it. I wonder if he’ll find someone to warm his bed there too. I don’t doubt he knows a couple of actresses or models down there. If not, Mr. Takuya will be happy to introduce him to some.
I knock on his door and wait for his permission to enter. He looks stressed and distraught when I walk in. He looks at me cautiously, as though he’s wondering whether I’ve seen the picture and how I might react.
I stand in front of his desk and slide the itinerary his way. “This is the proposed timeline. I contacted the Singapore office and they agreed to assist with the presentation. The itinerary has been approved by Sasuki, Mr. Takuya’s son.”
Daniel stares at me. I wonder if he heard a thing I just said. “Daniel?”
He blinks and nods at me. I smile politely and repeat what I said. Daniel nods along but he’s absentminded. He’s probably still thinking about last weekend’s girl. I wonder how long she’ll last. They rarely make it beyond three weeks.
“You — are you all right?” he asks, his voice soft. He sounds concerned, and I wonder if my eyes are red despite the eyedrops.
“Why wouldn’t I be?”
Daniel shakes his head and looks over the itinerary. “Come with me to Singapore. You know this project better than anyone else. You can take the lead.”
I nod. “That’s a wonderful opportunity, boss. I won’t let you down.”
Daniel stands up and leans forward, his palms on his desk. “Boss? You haven’t called me boss in months. What’s going on?”
I shake my head. “Nothing. Would you prefer it if I call you Daniel at all times?”
He looks at me warily and then looks down. “You saw the photo.”
I inhale deeply and nod. “Yes, of course. Me and everyone else at the office, and probably a couple hundred thousand other people. She’s pretty.”
He looks at me in disbelief. “She’s pretty?” he repeats.
I purse my lips and look away. “If that’s all, Daniel, I’ll get back to work.”
I turn to walk out of his office, but he grabs my wrist before I reach the door. I turn back to look at him and raise my brows.
“That’s all you’ve got to say?” he snaps.
I look away. “She’s just your type, isn’t she? Tall, blonde and with no curves to speak off. No wonder you wanted to start seeing other people. All the girls you’ve been with are the opposite of me. Like I said, she’s pretty. What else am I supposed to say? Well done?”
I’m average height with dark brown hair, green eyes and more curves than he can fit in his hands. I’m not even remotely fat, but I’m certainly not catwalk thin either. I’ve always been told that I’m pretty, but I’m not drop dead gorgeous like the women Daniel dates.
“You asked for things to go back to how they were before we got married, and I guess you made it happen. I hear you now. I get it. I’m sorry I kept clinging to you all week last week. I kept pestering you to watch movies with me and to eat with me. I won’t do it again. I apologise. You were quite clear when you told me you wanted to see other people… that you wanted us to be the way we were before we got married. I’ll work to make that happen. I won’t overstep again.”
Daniel tightens his grip on my wrist and pulls me closer. I stumble in my heels and only just manage to balance myself.
“Alyssa, no. That’s not…” He inhales deeply and looks away. “Look, nothing happened between me and her. It was just a business meeting. That’s all.”
I laugh. “I don’t remember ever attending a meeting and holding a business partner’s arm while his jacket is wrapped around my shoulder. But sure.”
I yank my wrist out of his grip and walk to the door.
“I didn’t cheat on you, Alyssa. I swear. She’s just an old friend that had a proposal for me. That’s all.”
I turn back and smile at him. So at first it was a business meeting and now she’s an old friend? “You don’t need to make excuses, Daniel. Our marriage isn’t the type where that is required. Like you said… You’ll do what you want and there’s nothing I can do about it if I want to inherit my father’s shares. Point taken. You needn’t worry. You’ve made it clear that I don’t have any rights to you. I’ll stop now. I’ll stop seeing things that clearly aren’t there.”
I walk out and pray some of my heart will remain when our marriage inevitably comes to an end.
