I stared at the girl before me. Her nervous eyes behind those black-rimmed glasses were also set on me. Tentatively, I tucked a strayed strand behind my ear and bit my lip. She mimicked.
I blinked. So did she.
“You done with your staredown match with yourself, Em?” A huff came from behind me. “For God’s sake! You’re doing this for the last five minutes. You’re creeping me out now!”
I glanced at my best friend through the mirror. With folded arms on her chest, sitting at the edge of my bed, she scowled at me.
My gaze went back to my reflection. “I don’t know, Beth. Do you think he—he’ll like my look?”
“After we spent two hours to doll you up? Yes, we think he’ll like your look. And won’t reject you when you announce your undying love for him,” Cassie said, my other best friend, standing beside Beth.
Reject. The same word has been haunting my dreams for years now. I’ve been waiting for this day for six years. The day he said those words to me. I’ve been waiting since.
And if he rejects me today… I don’t know what I would do.
“Will you be my prince, Ace? I want to be your princess.”
I asked my brother’s best friend after he gave me a Cinderella dress on my ninth birthday.
He laughed at my silly question, almost breaking my heart. But seeing my crestfallen face, he crouched down before me, looking at me with his stormy gray eyes. “You’re my princess.”
“Really?” I lit up like a Christmas tree. “That means you will marry me?”
He bit his lip, his eyes lit up with amusement. “I’m sorry, Rosebud. But I can’t.”
“Why not?” I pouted.
“Because it’s not the right time. You’re still so young.”
“Then when will be the right time?” I gazed up at him with so much hope.
“When you turn into a blooming rose from a rosebud.”
I waited for the day to bloom into a rose. I didn’t know what it meant at the time. But to remember and understand, I had written those words in my diary.
And Cassie said at this age we were big enough to have a lover. Well, she already had one at the age of fourteen, and was on her fourth at fifteen now.
I knew whatever Ace had said that day was because he didn’t want to break a nine-year-old’s naïve heart. But I didn’t care. I was ready to confess my feelings to him today. For real this time.
“Em, you’re looking stunning. Though I preferred your long wavy hair. But it’s all right, this suits you too,” Beth commented.
I had cut my waist length hair to my shoulder and tamed my wild waves into straight. Just like Tess, my sister. She and my brother, Tobias, were twins. So obviously, Ace was her best friend, too. I had once heard him say he liked Tess’s hair. So, I turned my hair just like hers. Though hers is blonde where mine is chestnut.
“Short hair is in fashion now. And Ace likes them short,” I replied, checking my manicured nails. Just like Tess’s.
Just like Ace preferred. All his girlfriends were just like my sister. Beautiful and classy. Yes, I was jealous of them. But then they all were temporary. Once we’d be together, then there wouldn’t be anyone else in his life other than me.
I blushed at the thought.
So, I decided to be like them, taking inspiration from my sister. Maybe he would notice me then?
And today’s whole makeover was the proof. Dressed like Tess, styled like Tess. I even sneaked her favorite perfume from her room.
“Isn’t this dress too short, Cassie?”
Though I wanted to wear something like Tess, I was uncomfortable in them. She looked good in those tight little dresses. She had a good amount on both front and behind. While I was flat in both sections. Well, a fifteen-year-old couldn’t have any more.
“Is not! You’re wearing that and that’s final! Don’t you want to make Ace notice you?” She raised her brow.
“Fine!” I said, taking a deep breath.
Come on, Em. You can do this.
“Let’s go now. Otherwise, we will miss your brother and sister’s grand entry,” she chirped, sauntering outside.
Today was my older siblings’ nineteenth birthday. And every occasion at Hutton family was known to be grand. No one wanted to miss this special event. Almost half of the renowned families of the town were invited today.
When we all reached the hall, I kept fidgeting in my place. My hands were clammy, and my chest thudded. I was nervous for tonight’s meeting with Ace. And my too short dress made me even more uncomfortable.
I spotted my parents in the crowd. They stood close to each other, as always.
They were always joined at the hip. Even after twenty years of marriage, they were so madly in love with each other. And that made me hope. If Ace and I would be like that someday…
“Em!” Mom’s voice broke my daydream.
Smiling, I padded towards them.
“Oh, my! Look at you. My little baby is looking so beautiful today!” she gushed. Her smile was blinding.
“You think?” I blushed.
“Of course, baby. You should do it more.”
Dad stayed quiet. He didn’t seem to be pleased with me dressing up like that. Opposite of my nature.
“You didn’t like the gown I brought for you, princess?” he asked.
I did. Very much. But Ace wouldn’t like that.
“Of course I did. But… I couldn’t find matching jewelry with it,” I lied.
He nodded.
Mom had a knowing look on. She knew, everyone knew, of my crush on Achilles Valencian. But they didn’t know it was more than just a mere crush.
He became my dream prince from the day he stepped into our house with Tobias when I was just seven. I still remembered that day clearly in my vague memories. But the day he saved me from some bullies in my school, he became my hero. And with time, he became my heart.
I stopped the urge to cover my flushed cheeks.
Where was he?
I looked around. People were gathered in small crowds. Some sipped on their drinks while some were engrossed in heavy conversations. He should’ve been here by now. Last month when he played chess with me, he promised me he would be here tonight. And he never broke his promises to me.
He used to come here everyday. But after the tragedy his family faced a year ago, his visit to our home lessened. He changed. Carefree, playful Ace turned into a lost and always angry Ace. He was always gentle with me, though. He would come and see us once a month. And of course, play chess with me.
The crowd cheered as Tess and Tobias descended the stairs in a dramatic way with the spotlight on them. In a pink mid-thigh fairy dress, Tess looked like a real fairy. Tobias also looked good in his black tux. They smiled down at the cameras as their friends clapped and whistled wildly.
But there wasn’t any sign of Ace.
Excusing myself, I aimlessly wandered around the people.
Where are you?
“Oww!”
Colliding into a hard chest, I stumbled back. A pair of arms soon circled around my waist.
“I’m so…” Looking up, my breath hitched at my throat.
Stormy gray orbs stared down at me.
His dense stubble was gone, revealing his chiseled jaw. Jet black hair was gelled back and the ring on his right brow wasn’t there tonight. Even though there were dark shadows under his beautiful eyes, and he had lost some weight, he still looked breathtaking.
“Rosebud?” His forehead creased as he straightened me on my feet. Gray irises roamed up and down my body, his jaw clenching. “What’re you wearing?”
The Greek accent was deep in his voice.
And it happened whenever he was angry.
My eyes widened. Didn’t he like my appearance?
“Uh, why? Don’t I look good?” I bit my lip. “I thought you would like it.”
His frown deepened as he watched my hair and heavy makeup. But then he shook his head.
“You don’t need my approval in anything, Emerald. It’s your choice whatever you want to wear.” With that, he walked away.
My heart fell.
I looked down at myself. Was anything wrong with my look? Why was he so distant?
He has been like this since his dad died. Our families weren’t close, they always preferred their privacy. So, no one really knew what happened to his dad. But whatever happened, it changed my Ace drastically. And it made my heart ache for him.
Running upstairs, I changed into the white gown Dad had brought me and removed my makeup. Once satisfied with my new, much natural look, I headed back downstairs.
Ignoring Cassie and Beth’s raised brows, I went to find Ace again.
Tobias and Tess were busy chatting with their friends, but he wasn’t there.
“Hey, Em!” Tobias called out.
Smiling, I walked to them.
“Aren’t you forgetting something, little sis?”
Chuckling, I hugged him tight. “Happy birthday!”
He lifted me off the ground, getting a squeal out of me.
“Where is my gift?” he asked once he put me down.
Tobias loved his birthday gift from me. He loved the red velvet cake I baked him since I honed my skills in baking. And so did Ace.
“You will get it after the party. It’s in the fridge,” I replied, my gaze going back to the crowd for a moment.
And there he was, standing at a corner beside a table. With a drink in his hand, he looked deep in thought.
“Happy birthday!” I wrapped my arms around Tess.
“Thanks!” She pulled back. “You changed?” Her eyes raked over my gown.
Mark, a boy in their group, slapped Ace’s back, greeting him. He didn’t reciprocate the gesture. And when Mark went to reach for the glass in his hand, a sharp look from him made the poor boy back away.
“That dress was slightly uncomfortable,” I said absentmindedly. My eyes set on him. “I will be back in just a minute.”
When I went to move, she caught my arm and dragged me away from her friends’ earshot. “You’re going to confess tonight, aren’t you?”
I let out a gasp. How did she know?
“Don’t.” Her tone was sharp. “You will only be heartbroken.”
Frowning, I snatched my arm from her grip. “How do you know? Who knows, maybe he likes me too.”
“Don’t be foolish, Em. Just because he is soft with you doesn’t mean he harbors any kind of feelings for you,” she said. “And you and I both know he only cares for you as a brother, not a lover. So don’t embarrass him with your stupidness. He is already disturbed with his own problems.”
Her words stung. I always feared his kindness towards me might be just a brotherly love. But deep down, I felt there was more than that. It may be stupid and nonsense, but my heart told me not to lose hope.
I won’t know unless I confront him, right?
“I won’t embarrass him. And you don’t know everything. So why don’t you just enjoy your party and let me be on my own?” My tone matched hers.
“Stay away from him, Emerald. He isn’t the one for you.”
My anger flared. “I will do whatever the hell I want, Tess. It’s none of your business! So, leave me alone.” Turning on my heels, I walked away.
Once I had padded close to where Ace stood, I took a calming breath and smoothed my hair. No one could stop me from expressing my feelings today.
“Hey!” My voice came out meek, gone was the confidence in the air. Nervousness fluttered in my tummy.
His gray orbs lifted to mine. This time, his gaze didn’t hold displeasure. But there wasn’t any pleasure either. They were just cold.
He was in a bad mood.
Should I do it today?
But I had to gather so much courage to make up my mind. I didn’t know if I would have that much guts anytime soon.
“Won’t you play chess with me today, Ace? I’ve been waiting for another match.”
Maybe after the game his mood will be lighter?
He thought for a second and then nodded. “Yeah, sounds good. This party is boring me, anyway.”
My grin was face splitting. “Let me get the board ready. In the library, as usual?”
He nodded, taking a sip. “I will be up in a few.”
Failing to contain my excitement, I threw my arms around his neck and hugged him tight. His exotic cologne made me giddy.
“I will be waiting for you.”
His shoulders tensed. His touch on my back was almost non-existent.
Taking a deep breath, he pulled me away by my shoulders. His lips pursed in a straight line. “Go.”
Nodding, I skipped off to our small library and started to make the board ready. I could barely contain myself from dancing around. I was finally going to tell him.
Tell him I loved him.
Ten minutes passed, but he didn’t show up. Then it turned into twenty. And there was no sign of him.
He said he’d be here in a few.
Letting out a sigh, I got up and went downstairs again. The party was going on in a full swing. Most elders retired for the night. There were only the youngsters, dancing and drinking wildly.
I spotted Cassie dancing with my brother while Beth chatted with some girls. But I couldn’t see him anywhere. The loud music and sharp smell of alcohol almost made me gag.
Where is he?
Making my way through the half-wasted dancing population, I padded towards the balcony. But he wasn’t even there. Did he forget about our match and left already?
But he never forgot our match.
Sighing in disappointment, I decided to go back up to my room.
Maybe another day.
Just as I turned to go, I heard something. Some strange noises. I didn’t fully enter the balcony earlier, I was at the doorway.
Curious, I slowly moved inside and looked to my right.
I froze.
My heart stopped in my chest, breath hitched in my throat. My hands shook at my sides as I took in the sight before me.
His hands were wrapped around her waist and hers were around his neck; one hand tugged at his black hair as their mouth worked on each other in a passionate kiss. Not even an inch of space was left between them.
Their every moan and groan hit my heart like a thousand stabs of knives, shattering it into millions of pieces.
My feet stumbled back, and tears fell from my eyes.
His hands roamed over her body as he pulled her closer.
My heart squeezed so hard I had to clutch my chest. A sob threatened to escape my lips.
Slapping a hand over my mouth, I ran away.
I didn’t stop until I was inside my room. Closing the door behind me, I let out an agonized sob. Tears blinded my vision with my hand over my heart. It pained physically.
I felt my insides breaking, falling into irreparable pieces.
Several knocks landed on my door, and my best friends’ concerned voices reached my ears. But I couldn’t speak, I couldn’t move. All I could do was lie on the floor in the darkness of my room and cry my heart out.
The visions of them tangled around each other flashed across my mind again and again.
He didn’t know, but she did. Her betrayal just intensified the pain more. Betrayal of others could be tolerated, but betrayal of loved ones?
How could she do this to me? How?
I stayed on the cold floor for the entire night, cradling my heart, mourning the loss of my love.
The love my own sister took away from me.
