My relief that Roc isn’t dead after all, that I won’t have to worry about Vane holding it against Darling or me, is short-lived.
Roc catches me off guard and hits with such force, my teeth clack together and my vision goes white.
I know I’m flying backward, but I can’t see through the stars and so I don’t know which way is up.
When I hit the cool water of the lagoon, the panic settles in.
The lagoon does not always give. Sometimes it takes. Sometimes it demands something of you in return and I have too much to lose.
I drop into the water on my back and the water immediately engulfs me.
When the ringing has left my ears and I orient myself toward the surface, I swim up, kicking my legs.
Until something grabs me around the ankle and drags me deeper.
The light at the surface gets further and further away and the bright blue glow of the lagoon water turns dark.
Down, down I go.
I fight against whatever spirit or creature has me, but there is no substance to its form, no fingers to pry free.
Air bubbles escape from my nose and float up to the top.
I may be immortal, but I still need to breathe and there’s no telling how long I can last down here.
It’s eerily silent save for the distant creak of what sounds like a rope.
When I reach bottom, the water is so chilly, I can barely feel my feet or my fingers, but I grope around blindly looking for anything to tear free.
Still nothing. Nothing to hint at the force that is holding me down.
What do you want? I say to the spirits. I know they can sense my thoughts. The lagoon knows all.
Never King.
The voice slithers out of the depths. I turn and see a flash of iridescent light, then it’s gone.
Never King, it comes again.
I’m fucking listening, I shout back as several more air bubbles escape with my frustration.
I’m useless down here while everyone I…
The word love flares like a match stick in the darkness behind my eyes.
Love.
Everyone I love.
Everyone I love is on the surface and I’m buried once again in the dark.
The fear overtakes me and the fear turns to terror.
What if I never return to them? What if I will always, endlessly be alone in the dark?
Never King.
Never King.
Given light, trapped in the dark.
Never King.
Never King.
I yank up on my foot.
Never King.
I fucking hear you! I shout.
The shape of a lagoon spirit bursts out of the darkness, mouth open in a screech.
The sound doesn’t reach down here, but the sensation of being shouted at does.
A current darts past me and I get swept up in it.
My head pounds and my chest aches as it gets harder and harder to hold my breath.
Never King.
Drenched in darkness, terrified of light.
Do you hear us now, Never King?
The current ebbs away.
Flashing tails swim a wide circle around me.
You cannot have light, a voice says.
Without darkness, another adds.
You cannot have darkness…
I am in no mood for your parables, I say. What is it you want? You want me to be better? You want me to be less dark and more light?
Just fucking tell me.
Whatever pressure was holding me down disappears and I get my feet beneath me again.
Never King.
Never King…
The voices fade away and the gleaming tails disappear.
The surface appears leagues away, but I swim toward it. Fast, faster, lungs burning, throat burning, mouth aching to burst open.
When I breach the surface, I inhale so deeply, my ribs ache.
Not wanting to linger in the water any longer, I take to the air, let the water slough off.
On the beach, the Crocodile is devouring everything in his wake. Pirates and fae alike.
But on Marooner’s Rock, Darling is wailing and I am terrified that I am already too late.
