I WAKE up as my feet hit the ground at the Sanctuary, my stomach churning horribly as my head spins. Bile burns a path up my throat, and I choke as I fight to keep it down.
Why does it always have to feel this way?
I wait for Gryphon to ease the discomfort, but when his hand doesn’t come up to cup my neck, I’m forced to slap a hand over my mouth instead.
A strong arm bands around my waist, hauling me back onto a broad chest as North snaps, “Are you going to give Gryphon back so that he can help her or not?”
I don’t understand what he means by that, and I’m too busy gagging to figure it out. Then Gryphon’s palm finally slides around my throat and his Gift flows into my body, flooding me and chasing the sickness away. It’s only once my head clears that I realize the room around us is silent, the kind of silence where a million things are floating around us unsaid, and that Gryphon’s hand isn’t cupping the side of my neck like it usually is.
He’s gripping my throat the same way that he would when we’re alone, when he’s whispering filthy demands and observations into my ear as his hips drive his cock into my body.
I glance up to find his bond staring back at me.
Blank face, black void eyes, I’m meeting the god within him properly for the first time. I’m suddenly very aware of all of the eyes on us both.
Kieran has brought us back to one of the training rooms underneath the Tac Training Center, smart decision, as always, and he’s already backed right away from this clusterfuck of a situation. He’s hovering by the door, close enough to help out the moment we need him, but he’s also perfectly aware that if our bonds are out, he’s more of a hindrance than a help.
I’m the only one who can really deal with them.
A quick glance is all it takes to know that none of my other Bonded are happy about his hands on me like this. Not the bond, because they might trust Gryphon to the ends of the earth, but they don’t trust the god that had lived hidden beneath his skin.
We all remember the warnings that Jericho had said.
The bonds kill their vessels.
Gryphon’s bond stares at me, unblinking as he reads me like a book. “I would never harm you. I couldn’t even if I wanted to. You’re mine. Nothing changes that.”
I’m not sure if he can just tell what I’m thinking by the look on my face or if he’s able to get past my defenses, but I nod slowly anyway, a slow sigh eking out from between my lips. His fingers flex around my throat, tightening just a little, and there’s murmurs of displeasure around us from the rest of our Bonded Group.
I should really focus on getting him to let go.
“No. You should tell them all to leave us alone. It’s been a very long time since I was with you last, Bonded.”
Oh, God.
Definitely reading my mind then.
A shadow twines itself around his wrist faster than my eyes can track, sliding along his palm and then wrenching his hand away from me. Gryphon’s lip curls as his bond snarls, but the shadows wrap around his body to keep him away from me.
“You’re effectively a stranger to us all right now, so you’ll be staying there until we know we can trust you,” North says, stepping between us and acting like a protective wall. I slip a hand onto his back, as much an anchor to myself in this moment as a reassurance to him.
I feel off-kilter at the turn the day has taken.
Kieran steps forward, approaching Gryphon’s bond the same way that you’d expect a man to approach a barrel full of pissed-off rattlesnakes.
As though he’s about to die for the audacity of breathing.
North shoots him a look, but Kieran ignores him entirely, speaking to Gryphon’s bond in a formal way that speaks both of respect and the fear that’s very obviously pumping through him right now.
“I’ve got Sage in one of the cells downstairs with the rest of our Bonded Group watching her. What exactly is in her head right now, and how do I get it out?”
In her head?
My eyes flash back to Gryphon and I snap, “What the hell is that supposed to mean? Why didn’t you say something sooner? What if she’s hurt right now or it’s doing damage?”
The bond, who hasn’t looked away from me yet, stays unresponsive to my words as his void eyes drink me in. I feel just a little bit uneasy at it, something I’d never felt around my Bonds or the bonds that live within them.
I don’t understand why.
“The god-bond is in her mind again. It’s been there before, therefore it’s an easy path for it to take to speak with us.”
The god-bond.
The one that had infiltrated her mind and used her body to kill our Shield, Dara, letting the Resistance into the Sanctuary and framing my best friend for a murder she would never commit. A violent sort of rage takes fire in my stomach, and I find myself moving before I’m really thinking about it, pushing my way past my Bonded and stalking down the rabbit warren hallways of the training center, all the way until I hit the elevator.
I can hear everybody bickering and arguing behind me, but I can’t stop myself from jabbing at the elevator button, cursing under my breath as the doors open. I glance behind myself to find Gryphon’s god-bond hovering behind me.
It’s strange that even without seeing his eyes, I can tell that it’s not my Gryphon. My Gryphon would have his arms crossed over his chest and a scowl fixed on his face as he assessed the situation, running through the possible outcomes over and over again until he had concocted a plan with the best-case scenario. His god-bond just stands and stares, so inhuman and expressionless as it takes everything in. Still, my heart tugs towards them both.
They both belong to me.
“Oli, what exactly are you going to do when you get down there? It’s not like you can fight the god-bond if it’s wearing Sage’s body like some sort of fucked-up puppet,” Gabe says as he steps alongside me, slipping his hand into mine and threading our fingers together.
Kieran shoots him a dark look for talking about his Bonded like that, but I only shrug. “If I can rip people’s souls out, don’t you think it’s possible that I can also force the god-bond out? Especially if it’s inside of someone it doesn’t belong to? It’s worth a try, and I’m sure my bond would enjoy eating something like that.”
Atlas chuckles darkly from behind me, his eyes still on Gryphon’s god-bond as though he’s expecting it to attempt to touch me again. North, protective and furious at all of this, as always, and Nox are half a step away from us all, talking quietly between themselves as their eyes drift slowly between Gryphon and I.
I can’t focus on that right now as the elevator dings and the doors open wide.
I can’t think about anything except Sage.
When we get to the cell that Sage is being kept in, I find the rest of her Bonded Group huddled around the giant glass wall. Felix, looking harried and a little worn around the edges, is watching her every move as he ignores the other two bickering viciously behind him.
Riley still looks as though he is recovering from the years he had spent being manipulated and assaulted by Giovanna, a Resistance spy sent in to manipulate their Bonded Group. His eyes are sunken into his head and his skin is still stretched a little too tight over his bones, making him look as though he is halfway to the grave already instead of just attempting to rest and get his brain back together. Last I’d spoken to Sage about it, he was still getting frequent nosebleeds. Even with all of Felix’s hard work, it was a slow and steady journey to get him back to where he needs to be.
The third man standing there is Sage’s fourth and final Bond, a man I haven’t formally met yet.
After North and Gryphon had finally decided to contact him and bring him to the Sanctuary, all the background checks and monitoring they had done coming up with not even the slightest taint of Resistance, Wick had been put into isolation until Gryphon had finished off the vetting process. Sage had been thrilled to meet him before we’d left, having instantly felt the same connection to him as she’d felt with the others. I’m glad that this one Bond had been a little less complicated for her. I know the path with the other three was… less than smooth.
He turns to look at us all as we make our way over and snaps, “How long are you going to keep her in there? She hasn’t done anything wrong.”
I don’t bother introducing or explaining myself to him, it’s easier to let North deal with that side of things. Instead, I give Felix a tight smile as he moves out of the way to let me face Sage through the glass. He trusts me. He knows what lengths I have always gone to for my friend. Plus, he knows that at the very least, he’s going to get an explanation.
Sage is sitting on the bed with a frown and her arms crossed, but she doesn’t look scared or worried, just pissed off.
She’s covered in soot and ash and splatters of blood up her legs from where she had fought alongside us at the Wastelands only a few hours ago. Her hair is a mess, and a smile tugs at the corner of my lips at the sight of her sitting there at the center of everyone’s attention, looking like she’s about to set someone’s ass on fire for this.
It’s a relief she’s not going to let this push her back into that panic spiral she was in last time.
Sage meets my eye and gives me a wry smile back, though it’s more exhausted than anything else. “It’s back, isn’t it? The thing that was in my head.”
I nod, pressing my hand against the glass and looking her over again as though I’ll be able to see it there under her skin somehow. “Can you feel it? Can you feel anything?”
She sighs and slumps back onto the bed, propped up on her hands and head rolling back on her shoulders as she looks at the ceiling in defeat. “No, I can’t feel anything. It’s only because I got put back in here that I guessed it had to be that. Did I do anything? I can’t remember anything, and I don’t think there are any gaps in my memory, but—”
I cut her off before she spirals too far down that path, “No, Gryphon’s bond just saw it in your head… that it’s waiting in there. He thinks it wants to speak to us, and that’s why it didn’t fully take over. It seems to know more about it than we do.”
“If it knows more, then why isn’t it saying something?” Felix murmurs to me quietly, and I side-eye him just a little.
“It’s only just woken up, and we’re still trying to get the introductions out of the way. I don’t think it is purposefully trying to deceive us.”
“What do you mean ‘woken up’?” Riley asks, pressing one of his hands against his forehead and the other against the glass. He looks at Sage with a mixture of sadness and longing that I’m sure is never going to change, at least, not without some deep therapy and a lot of reassurance from Sage that I’m not sure she is ready to give him yet.
Giovanna did a lot more damage to the two of them than anyone is ready to unpack.
Kieran steps up beside me and we share a look, then he glances over his shoulder at his team leader and close friend. “Take a look for yourself. If you can’t see that there’s been a big change in Shore, then I’m not confident in taking you on missions with us in the future.”
Even an outsider can see that there’s something else going on here.
Whether the god-bond realizes we are talking about him or if it’s just decided that enough is enough, it steps forward, pressing against my back and immediately setting the rest of the room off with that behavior.
A wisp of smoke curls up my leg and wedges its way between us, but I reach a hand out. “I’m fine. It’s fine. I think he’s been asleep and separated from his bond for a little too long to wake up with the ability to read the room.”
Atlas wedges himself between Felix and me once more with a respectful nod to the doctor-in-training and a wary eye at Gryphon’s bond.
I have very little patience for the posturing that’s happening.
I feel as though it’s all at Sage’s expense, like we’re wasting precious time here while there’s a ticking time bomb in her head.
“Can you get it out of her? Can you get it out and keep it out?”
The bond takes a breath, then his head tilts to one side again as he stares Sage down through the glass.
I’m glad she’s still staring at the ceiling because even I can recognize that bearing the full weight of the god-bond’s attention can be, at the very least, unsettling.
“It came here to speak to us. I can get it out once we’ve heard what it has to say, otherwise it will just find another path to us… perhaps one more dangerous.”
Kieran’s jaw clenches but he holds his tongue, though Wick isn’t so good at restraining himself. “You’re happy for it to just use her like that? Would you be so happy if it was your Bonded?”
The god-bond turns to stare at him and to his credit, he only cringes a little. “There is no one strong enough to do that to my Bonded now that we’re all together.”
“Which is exactly why I knew I needed to come and see you all now, as disgusting and distasteful as groveling might be. I guess we’ll all have to cower at your feet now that you’ve won.”
We all turn to Sage, her voice, but not her words, ringing through the air between us as we take in the void eyes and the god-bond in control of her body.
YOU WOULD THINK after seeing all of my Bonded taken over by the beings that live within them that seeing Sage this way wouldn’t come to such a shock, but the gods within my Bonded still feel familiar to me. They still feel like they belong to me, like I’ve known them forever. They are as magnetic and alluring as the men they live within.
The god-bond speaking through Sage makes my skin crawl.
My hackles rise, and every fiber of my being wants to reach inside her and yank it out.
It does not belong there, and I’m repulsed by its presence.
The way it smirks at us all is horrifying. It’s an expression I would never see on Sage’s face, one that makes her look like a completely different person. I can’t contain the shudder that runs through me no matter how hard I try. I really shouldn’t be giving it any extra ammo against us, but that’s my best friend.
I’m only relieved that Sawyer isn’t in the room. The heart attack that he would be having at the sight of his sister right now would be at a whole new level.
“Whatever you’re here to say, just say it and leave. We’re not interested in making nice with Resistance scum, not now and not ever, no matter the color of your eyes.”
The smirk stays put and it stares back at North in that unblinking way they all have. “I’m not discussing anything with the vessels, so run along now and give me the gods so the adults can speak.”
Whoever the hell this is, they’ve been awake long enough to develop a human sense of humor, one that is quickly going to get under North’s skin.
He stares it down for a second before an answering smirk stretches over his own lips. “You don’t get to make demands here. You either state your case and leave, or we get you out of her head and then hunt you down.”
I don’t know where we would even start to look for it, but whether or not North is bluffing, I can’t tell.
Sage’s eyes flick over each and every one of us, ignoring the humans without god-bonds as though they aren’t even in the room, before they fixate on Gryphon. “So, which one are you, then? I never can tell when you’re fresh like this.”
I feel the power build and push out of Gryphon’s body before Sage is clutching at her head with a groan.
I have to remind myself that it’s not her, that she can’t feel or process any of this right now. This will just be a blank moment for her, but it’s still not pleasant to see. Kieran makes an unhappy noise under his breath, Felix winces and glances away, and the other two start bickering about it, but neither of them are dumb enough to attempt to stop Gryphon’s bond.
I’m not even sure I could.
“Soothsayer. It’s been an age, or maybe even three, since I last saw you. I was kind of hoping I wouldn’t run into you in this lifetime. I’d rather deal with the shadow boys than you.”
A very inappropriate giggle tries to burst out of my lips at the very idea of someone calling North and Nox ‘shadow boys’. I know that if I look at either one of them right now, I will lose the fight and dissolve into a fit of laughter.
Maybe my brain was scrambled by the fight with Davies?
I shouldn’t think about that right now, not unless I want to lose my shit in a completely different way.
I’m distracted from my own spiral of doom by Nox stepping forward, his eyes shifting to black as his bond takes over and his voice echoes through our mind connection to everyone.
My bond agreed to share the helm to get it talking and this shitshow over with.
He always did have the best relationship with his bond. I can feel Gabe and North’s approval through the mind connection, and while I’m sure Atlas also thinks this is a great idea, he’s not exactly going to say it, thanks to their animosity.
“I don’t even have to guess or hear your voice to know which one you are. You two always did come in pairs, as much tied to each other as you are to the Eternal. What stroke of insane luck did you all have to arrive together? Or was it some sort of black magic you’ve found and won’t share? How does it feel to be the luckiest sons of bitches to ever cycle?”
I have no idea what any of that means, but Nox’s bond clearly does.
It cocks its head in that same way they all have. “Patience and unerring devotion is all it took. The rest of you have spent too long fighting amongst yourselves and not enough time looking for what you really need. The Eternal is mine. I return for my Bonded.”
A shiver runs up my spine at the sound of his voice and the very public declaration of love that might be coming from Nox’s bond, but it’s still about me, here in front of everyone, in his voice.
I’m careful not to turn to look at him, because I’ll probably make a fool of myself if I do.
The god-bond inside of Sage throws her head back and laughs. “You say that like I want to fight with the rest of them! You already know I have no choice. None of us do! They always come calling.”
Nox’s bond shakes his head. “What do you want? Why bother coming here, because all you have done is paint a target on yourself. We’re all together now, protected, and growing stronger by the minute. You think we’re just going to sit here and wait for your next move? We’re going hunting. We’re not going to stop until every last one of you are thrown back into the cycle and we’re left alone here to finally live out a lifetime together.”
My heart clenches in my chest and, finally, I look back to meet North’s eyes. He’s already watching me, and when our eyes meet, I want to cry at the longing there. It’s all him, the desperation he’s felt his whole life to find me and protect me, to have me for himself.
He doesn’t need his god-bond to feel that way.
Sage’s head cocks to the side once again, a mirror of Nox’s, but this time, the expression on her face is more human than I have seen any of the god-bonds act. It’s scared of whatever others are out there, and I think it might just be telling the truth here.
“I’m not on their side. I know you don’t want to believe that because I helped some of them get in here, but I was trying to keep them away from my bond.”
Gryphon’s arms slip around my waist. “It didn’t work though, did it? You endangered the rest of us for no reason, and now you’ve come crawling back here for our help.”
“Are you happy to hear that it didn’t work and they killed my Bonded? Do you get some form of sick enjoyment out of that?”
Its eyes flick back to Nox as she continues, ”No, you don’t. You just hate that I’m still here even without it. You think that your form of devotion is the only one. I’ve lost this cycle, but I need to do what I can for the next one. I’m not just going to throw away a chance at finding some allies.”
Nox’s bond turns to look at Gryphon, then its eyes flick down to me, devotion and obsession in them as it traces my face. “We don’t need allies. We need you all dead.”
I feel as though if I leave it up to the bonds, we’re going to be stuck here forever talking about who is the strongest and what nefarious plans they all have for each other. And no matter how possessed and unrecognizable Sage might look at the moment, I can’t stop thinking about my best friend and her body being used right now.
I reach out to my own bond where it’s slumbering somewhere around my spleen, but it merely yawns and stretches before rolling over and going back to sleep. Fighting in the Wasteland has worn it out enough that without direct danger to our Bonded Group, it’s just not interested in coming to the party.
I cast another fleeting look in North’s direction, only to remember that the last thing he would be willing to do would be to let his bond out to finish this off, so instead, I focus back on Nox.
I haven’t spent a huge amount of time with his bond, or any of the bonds really, but I have a level of comfort and familiarity with it that I just don’t have with Gryphon’s yet.
I want this to be over, I send through our mind connection to it, and though Nox hears it, he knows it isn’t for him and leaves the two of us to speak.
The bond doesn’t look at me, but I feel its presence in my mind straight away.
Do you want me to end it?
I scowl and answer quickly, I don’t want you to hurt Sage… but I want that bond out of her, and I want it never to get back in again. Can the Soothsayer really do that?
With you, he can do anything. Now that we’re all together, I don’t doubt his limitlessness at all.
I tilt my head back until I’m staring at Gryphon’s bond, upside down and a little confusing, but I can tell he likes that I haven’t tried to step away from him, that I have just allowed him to be close to me for now.
I’m tired, and this all feels like it’s for nothing. I’d rather be done with it and go back to the house together. If you can get it out of her head, do it now, please. For me. Just don’t hurt her.
Sage’s mouth opens again, ready for the next litany of insults and sharp barbs, but Gryphon’s eyes flash again, that same eerie, unnatural, blackness that they get when the god-bonds call on their power, and Sage collapses back to the bed, a groan ripping out of her chest that definitely sounds like one of her own.
Gryphon’s bond looks down at me with that same expressionless face. “I closed her mind to the god-bond. It cannot use her again, Bonded.”
