“I have to go,” I tell Kas as I walk past him without looking at him.
He says my name. I ignore him and keep walking.
“Daisy.” His voice is as firm as the hand that curls around my upper arm, pulling me to a stop.
“What?” I snap, spinning back to face him.
“What the hell is going on?” His brows are drawn together. He looks angry.
That makes two of us.
“I could ask you the same thing,” I bite. Then, I immediately regret it. “Look…whatever. I have to go. Fire me if you need to.”
Something flashes in his eyes, but I don’t care enough in this moment to try to figure out what it was.
I yank my arm free from his hand, and then I’m on the move again.
I hear a growl from behind me.
“For fuck’s sake, just hold up!” he yells right before he grabs my arm again, pulling me around to face him.
“I don’t have time for this!” I yell back.
I see the surprise in his eyes, and it gives me sweet satisfaction.
Yeah, dickhead, I can shout, too.
“I have to go.” I lower my voice. “My brother needs me, and I have to go.”
“Jesse? Is he okay?”
“I don’t know! That’s why I need to get to him. So, let me go!”
I pull at my arm, and he lets go.
But his next words stop me.
“I’ll take you to him.”
He’ll drive me to Jesse, but I’m not good enough to kiss?
Whatever.
I need to get to Jesse, and accepting a lift from Kas will get me there quicker than me calling a cab, which I wouldn’t be able to afford.
“That would be a big help. Thank you,” I say the words without meeting his eyes.
He nods. “Let me just grab my car keys.”
I follow Kas through the house, getting my bag from the coat closet while he gets his car keys from his office.
“Ready?” he asks, stepping back into the hall.
I nod and then follow him out to his car.
We’re seated inside when he asks me where we’re going.
Sighing quietly, I rest my elbow on the door and put my head in my hand. I stare out the window as Jesse’s words echo in my mind after I asked him the same question.
“I’m at the mini-mart on The Broadway.”
I didn’t even question why he was at a supermarket and in need of my help.
I have a pretty good idea why he is there and needs my help, but I really, really don’t want it to be true.
But, either way, it doesn’t matter. If Jesse needs me, I’m there.
“There’s a mini-mart on The Broadway in Sutton. That’s where Jesse is.”
I watch as Kas inputs the address into his GPS. When it’s set, he puts the car in drive.
The silence is deafening, and my mind is working overtime.
“I know what you’re thinking,” I say quietly.
“Do you?” He doesn’t look at me.
“You think that I’m more trouble than I’m worth.”
“That wasn’t what I was thinking.”
But he doesn’t disagree that I am trouble.
He’s right. I might try to keep my life clean and problem-free, but no matter how hard I try, problems always find me.
A part of me wants to ask what exactly he was thinking, but I’m too chickenshit to do so. Instead, I sit quietly and just stare out the window.
Kas pulls up outside the mini-mart twenty minutes later. It feels like it was the longest twenty minutes of my life. We didn’t speak the whole way here. And I’ve been worrying about Jesse and what to expect when I get inside that supermarket.
“Thanks for the lift.” I unclip my seat belt. “I really appreciate it.”
“You seem to be saying that a lot lately.”
I slide a glance at him. His expression is tight, but his lips have a soft curl to them.
“You’re right. I have been. I’m sorry,” I say.
“You say that a lot, too.”
“You mean, sorry?”
“Yeah.”
“Maybe it’s because I am sorry. I don’t mean to be a bother to you.”
He exhales a tired sound. “You’re not a bother.” He turns his face to me, his eyes fixing on mine. When he speaks again, it sounds like his voice is lined with gravel, “Honestly, it’s surprising to me, just what I am willing to do for you.”
That takes me aback. What does he mean by that?
Unsure and nervous, I swallow roughly. “Well, I appreciate everything you’ve done for me.” I tear my eyes from his and reach down to retrieve my bag from the footwell. My heart is hammering in my chest. “Once I’m done here and I’ve gotten Jesse back home, I’ll come straight back to work, and I’ll stay late to make up the time.”
“You don’t need to.”
I don’t?
That brings my eyes back to his. “I don’t? But that’s a whole afternoon’s work.” And I need the money. I don’t say that, of course.
Kas must read the concern in my eyes because his own soften. “I’ll still pay you for the full day. Just go see to your brother, Daisy.”
With warmth in my heart, I curl my fingers around the door handle and open it. “Thank you so much.” I blush, realizing that I’m thanking him again. “I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow,” he says.
I get out of the car and shut the door.
I watch as Kas drives away.
His words echo through my mind. “Honestly, it’s surprising to me, just what I am willing to do for you.”
My stomach flips and tightens. What on earth did he mean by that?
But, right now, I don’t have the time to think about what he meant. I need to get to Jesse.
Taking a deep breath, I ready myself, and then I walk into the mini-mart.
I glance around, expecting to see Jesse. Of course, I don’t.
If he did what I think he did, then he’ll be in the back with the store manager.
Please don’t have shoplifted, Jesse.
I’ve been in here to buy groceries a few times. The tills are over to my left. There are people being served. I really don’t want to go over there and ask for Jesse. I look for a security guard, but there’s no one.
Then, I see a young guy filling up the shelves down the biscuit aisle. I walk over to him.
“Excuse me. I got a call from my brother, Jesse. He said he was here…” I let my words trail off, not really sure what else to say.
Something unpleasant flickers in his gaze, and then he says, “Come with me.”
He puts the pack of biscuits that was in his hand back in the box and starts to walk away toward the back of the store. I follow him.
He stops by a door, swipes it with a fob, and opens it. He holds it open for me to pass through first.
“They’re just in the manager’s office,” he says, letting the door shut behind us.
Manager’s office? My stomach turns.
I follow him down the short corridor. He stops outside a door and knocks before opening it.
“The sister’s here,” he says to whomever’s in the room. Then, he stands aside, letting me through the door.
A guy—I’d say in his late thirties—is sitting behind a desk. I’m guessing he’s the store manager. A bigger guy in a security uniform is standing by the wall, and near him, Jesse is sitting in a chair.
His eyes meet mine. I see a glimmer of relief mixed with fear in them.
“Miss Smith?” the manager says, rising to his feet.
I step further into the room, closing the door behind me. “Daisy,” I tell him.
“I’m Jeff, the store manager. Please take a seat.” He gestures at the chair in front of his desk.
“Can you tell me what’s going on here, Jeff?” I try to keep my tone even. I sit and hold my bag in my lap.
“You’re Jesse’s guardian?” Jeff asks me.
I glance at Jesse. His eyes are pleading.
“That’s correct.” I swallow back my lie, looking back to Jeff.
“Okay, well, I’m sorry to tell you, but your brother was caught shoplifting by Brett.” He tips his head in the direction of the security guard who is standing by Jesse.
But I can’t look at Brett, the security guard. All I can do is stare at Jesse, who’s looking at everything but me. With a lump in my throat and a sick feeling in my stomach, I know this is my fault.
“I didn’t call the police because I thought we could deal with this in-house.”
The relief I feel at that is immense.
I pull my eyes from Jesse and look back to Jeff. “Thank you so much,” I say in earnest.
“Well, after Jesse said his parents had passed away in such tragic circumstances and that he was under your guardianship…I didn’t want to give the lad, or you, more grief to deal with. And I think he gets that he made a stupid mistake.”
“His parents had passed away in such tragic circumstances.”
One parent, and it wasn’t exactly a tragic circumstance. When did he get so good at lying?
My eyes slide to Jesse. It surprises me that he’s actually looking at me. But worry tightens my gut when I see the hint of defiance in his eyes. Almost like he’s daring me to call him out for lying.
Swallowing, I look back to Jeff. “What did he steal?”
“A six-pack of Kestrel Beer.”
Alcohol.
He’s stealing and drinking.
Jesus Christ.
“I am so sorry.” I lay my hands out in a pleading manner. “He’s never done anything like this before. He’s just…had a rough time of it as of late. Not that I’m making excuses for him because I’m not.” I glance at Jesse again. Keeping my eyes on Jesse, I speak to Jeff, “You said you wanted to deal with this in-house.” I look at Jeff. “What are you proposing?”
In my peripheral, I see Jesse sit up a little straighter.
“Well, the outside of the shop could do with a good clean. We lost our window cleaner a while back, and I haven’t gotten around to getting a new one. So, maybe Jesse could come tomorrow after school and clean the windows, and we’ll call it quits. How does that sound?”
“Perfect,” I say before Jesse can say anything. Standing, I hang my bag on my shoulder. “I won’t be able to accompany him, as I’m at work until six. But I’ll give you my number in case you need it. If Jesse doesn’t turn up, then you have my permission to call the police and report the attempted theft.”
Jeff smiles at me and hands me a pad and pen. I scribble my number down and hand it back to him.
Then, I turn to Jesse. “Let’s go.” I give a jerk of my head, and then I turn for the door.
I hear him following behind me.
I don’t speak until we’re outside.
I stop abruptly and turn to him. “What the hell were you thinking?” I throw my hands up in the air.
That defiance, mixed with good old anger and resentment, flashes through his eyes. “Thought I’d join the family business.”
“This isn’t a joke, Jesse! You were lucky that he didn’t call the cops!”
He folds his arms and frowns down at me. “Maybe I wanted him to. I’ve heard that prison is cushy. Might be better than where I am now.”
My eyes widen, and fear bangs my heart against my chest. “You have no idea what you’re talking about,” I bite.
“No? Then, why don’t you tell me?” he challenges.
“Because you don’t need to know.” I lift my eyes to his, trying to convey my feelings. “No kid needs to know what the inside of a prison is like.”
His brows draw together in anger. “I’m not a kid,” he grinds out.
“Yes, you are!” I snap. “You’re my kid!” The words are out before I can stop them.
His eyes ignite with something that makes my stomach twist. “I’m not your kid!” he yells. “I don’t have parents!”
Something snaps inside me, and I don’t care that there are people around, listening. “Yes, you do! You have me!” I slam a hand to my chest. “On paper, I might be your sister, but I raised you, Jesse! Changed your nappies! Fed you! Clothed! Nursed you when you were sick! Read you bedtime stories! Went to all of your school plays! I raised you!”
“And then you fucking left me!” he roars.
The pain in his words is so apparent, and it takes me back a step, like a blade going through my chest. I can’t even pull him up for swearing. In the grand scheme of things, Jesse saying a curse word is nothing.
He’s hurting. Because of me.
“You…left,” he whispers.
And the ache of his words only intensifies, like the blade in my chest is being twisted.
“Jesse”—I step closer to him—“you have to know that I didn’t want to leave. I would have done anything to stay with you. Anything.”
His eyes flash to mine. “But you didn’t though, did you, Daisy? You stole from that place, knowing what the consequences would be. Or did you just not care? Or were you that arrogant that you thought you wouldn’t get caught?”
He still thinks I’m guilty. Even now. Even though I told him in person that I was innocent, he still doesn’t believe me.
I can’t express the torment I feel at that.
I wrap my arms over my chest. My words come quietly. “You know me, Jesse. I’m not a thief. Deep down inside of you, you know I didn’t steal that jewelry. You know I would never have done something like that.”
Not meeting my eyes, he lets out a scoffing sound. It reignites something inside me.
“You can fool yourself into believing it’s the truth—that I’m this thief who never cared about you—because you think it justifies your anger and your current behavior. But you know it’s not the truth. You know that I would never have done anything to risk losing you.”
His eyes come to mine. I can’t get a read on them.
“Why should I believe you?” His voice is still toneless.
“Because I’ve never given you a reason not to believe me. I was there, Jesse…through everything. I never walked away. The only reason I left was because I was taken away without a choice. But I’m back now. I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere. I’ll never leave. I’ll never let anyone take me away again. But you have to let me in. Please.”
Sighing, he looks away and runs a hand through his hair. When he brings his eyes back to me, I see the hardness in them has softened.
“Why didn’t you let me come see you in prison?” he asks in a low voice.
I’m transported back years. He sounds just like the boy I remember.
My heart breaks in this moment. I can’t stop the tears that fill my eyes.
Biting my lip, I brush the tears away with my fingers. “Because I didn’t want you coming to that place…seeing me like that. But that doesn’t mean that I didn’t think about you every day. The thought of you was the only thing that got me through those eighteen months.”
I reach out a hand to touch him but pull it back, unsure of if he wants me to touch him.
His eyes are on the ground. He exhales a tired-sounding breath. “I have to go,” he says softly, toeing the concrete with his shoe.
“Can I walk you home?”
He shakes his head, eyes still on the ground. “But…you can call me later, if you want?”
My heart soars, and I can’t help the smile that spreads on my face. “I’d love that.”
Jesse lifts his eyes to mine. He brushes his overgrown hair out of them. “Cool. Well, I guess we’ll talk later then.”
“Definitely.”
I watch Jesse walk away with a hope in my heart that I haven’t dared allow myself to feel in a very long time.
