“Nikolas, come in.”
I entered the apartment and closed the door behind me. Following Nate into the kitchen, I sat at the table as he rolled his chair to the spot across from me. I couldn’t help but notice his pale skin and the dark shadows under his eyes. He’d lost weight as well. Neither of us was eating or sleeping well these days, but he didn’t have a demon to bolster his strength.
I gave him a hard stare. “When was the last time you ate? Or slept?”
“I ate” – he looked at the wall clock in the kitchen – “five hours ago.” He avoided my question about sleep like he always did.
“Nate, you have to take better care of yourself. What will Sara say when she comes home and sees you like this?”
His green eyes, so much like hers, took on a haunted look. “Nikolas, it’s been two weeks.”
“I know.”
If he asked, I could tell him exactly how many days and hours it had been. I’d spent them searching every stretch of woods and road, every cave and cove for fifty miles. I had driven every street in Portland, praying I’d feel her presence. Our people had used every resource at our disposal, trying to find even a trace of her. It was as if Sara had vanished into thin air.
In the beginning, everyone had joined in the search, despite the tension between the wolves and the dozen or so warriors camping out in town. The pack was upset so many vampires had walked into their territory and attacked someone under their protection. Maxwell had been incensed that the two wolves he’d sent to guard Sara that day had shirked their responsibility, thinking it wasn’t their job to protect a Mohiri. Maxwell had assured me their punishment was severe. Cold comfort.
After the third day, people began to say Sara was dead. Wherever I went in town, I could overhear conversations about “that poor girl who drowned.” It angered me every time I heard them talk about her that way, but I couldn’t stop people from talking.
It was a week before her friends gave up hope. I didn’t see much of Roland and Peter after that because Maxwell had them doing extra training. But the few times I saw them it was clear the two of them were grieving.
“Sara’s not coming home,” Nate said.
“Yes, she is. Don’t give up on her.”
“I want to believe that more than anything, but I have to face the truth, and so do you.” He swallowed hard. “Sara is dead. It’s time we both accept it.”
“I’m sorry, but I can’t do that.” As long as the bond was alive, Sara was alive, and I’d search for her forever if that’s what it took.
He sighed wearily and looked down at his clasped hands. “Father Glenn came to see me yesterday. He thinks it’s time we let people say good-bye to Sara. We’re having a memorial service for her tomorrow at St. Patrick’s. I thought you might like to be there.”
I pushed my chair back and strode to the window. My fingers gripped the edge of the countertop as I stared at the waterfront and tried to rein in my emotions. I didn’t know where Sara was, but I knew with absolute certainty she was alive. And no one would ever convince me otherwise.
“You have to let her go. We both do. I don’t know how your people cope with grief, but humans need closure. We say good-bye. Then we try to keep going as best we can.”
When I didn’t respond, he continued. “I know you felt responsible for her, and you blame yourself for what happened. Anyone who’s met you knows you did everything in your power to save her. Sara knows that too.”
The countertop creaked under my fingers, and I released it before I accidentally pulled it from the wall. Turning, I met Nate’s agonized gaze. I didn’t want to add to his pain, but I would never accept that Sara was gone forever. My heart would stop beating before I gave up on her.
“I understand why you need to have the service, but I won’t be there.” My voice was steady, revealing nothing of the storm raging inside me. I walked past him and stopped in the kitchen doorway. “I’m sorry.”
I left the apartment and strode back to my hotel where my bike was parked. A few minutes later, I rode past Nate’s, heading out of town.
Passing the marina, I spotted the large yacht still moored at the end of the main dock. After Sara disappeared, Roland told us the two of them had narrowly escaped Haism’s men and the Hale witch at the marina the night of the storm. They’d gone there to meet her buyer, Malloy, and the men had come after them. He and Sara had escaped by jumping off a boat and hiding under the pier. Roland said he and Sara had honestly believed those men were after Malloy and that they’d just gotten caught up in his trouble.
Chris and I had scoured every inch of al-Hawwash’s yacht for clues, anything that would lead us to Sara. Tristan had sent people to go through the sheik’s house in Portland, along with many of his other holdings around the world. Tristan believed the sheik had Sara stashed away somewhere, and he had Yusri al-Hawwash living under a microscope these days. The sheik couldn’t buy toothpaste without us knowing about it.
I passed the city limit sign, and soon I was on the old mine road. I’d been down this way so many times in the last two weeks that I knew every rock, tree, and bend in the road. I parked in my usual spot and trekked through the woods to the cliff, the last place I’d seen Sara.
When I broke through the trees at the edge of the field, my throat tightened as it did every time I saw the cliff. Memories of that day assailed me, and I relived them all, trying to see what I could have done differently. I’d been through countless battles and I’d never doubted my skills as a warrior. But this one haunted me and left me wondering how I had failed her.
I walked to the edge of the cliff and stared down at the waves pummeling its base. Nate, the werewolves, and the whole town believed Sara had died here, her body swept out to sea. I understood why they’d given up hope; they didn’t have a bond telling them she was still alive.
But even without the bond, I’d find it hard to believe that such a spirited, passionate person, who had survived so much, was gone. She’d tried so hard to go unnoticed, not realizing her inner fire drew people to her like a beacon, just as it had called to me before I knew who or what she was.
And now they wanted to say good-bye to her. Tomorrow her family and friends would gather in their church to sing sad hymns and pray for her immortal soul. I couldn’t do that, not for Nate or anyone else. It would be a betrayal of the person who I knew was still alive out there, lost and waiting to be found.
“Where are you, Sara?” I asked for what felt like the thousandth time.
For the thousandth time, there was no answer.
* * *
Organ music spilled from the open double doors of the church that was filled to overflowing. At least a dozen men stood on the steps because there was no room for them inside. The music stopped and the priest began to speak again, his deep voice amplified by the microphone he was using.
I stood across the street from the church but close enough for my enhanced hearing to pick up the priest’s words.
“Our hearts are heavy with sorrow today as we come together to say good-bye to Sara Grey, who was called home into our Lord’s embrace. When we lose a child, it’s natural for us to question why God would take someone young –”
Pain pricked my chest, and I rubbed the spot over my heart as I tuned out the priest’s voice. I didn’t know why I had come here, why I would torment myself this way. Watching people gather in a memorial service for someone I knew was alive was senseless.
But I couldn’t turn away. Sara’s uncle and friends were inside the church, mourning her. I’d watched Nate arrive with Roland and Judith, and it tore at me to see the grief on their faces. I think I stayed because I didn’t want them to suffer alone.
The priest stopped talking, and I heard someone else take the mic. I could tell by the voice that she was young, most likely one of Sara’s classmates. She spoke for a few minutes, and then someone else started talking. We had a custom like this among my people, where friends and family of a fallen warrior would take turns celebrating the warrior’s life. Perhaps we were not as different from humans as I’d thought.
The music began again, and people poured slowly from the church. Nate appeared first, accompanied by Judith and Maxwell. He sat in his chair just outside the door, and people stopped to pay their condolences as they filed out. It looked like the entire pack had shown up, along with most of Sara’s school.
Roland and Peter emerged with a young man in a black biker jacket. The man’s dark blond hair fell to his shoulders, but it didn’t hide the raw grief on his face.
Who was he? A friend? A relative? Or someone who’d been more than a friend to her? The emotions he showed were not those of simple friendship. This man cared about her deeply.
At the bottom of the church steps, the three of them stopped to talk, and Roland laid his hand on the other man’s shoulder. The blond man nodded and walked to a classic Harley sitting alone at the end of the parking lot. He straddled the bike and just sat there, his head hung and his shoulders shaking. After a few minutes, he wiped his eyes with his sleeve and drove off.
I looked at the church again as Chris appeared in the doorway. He spoke briefly to Nate before he continued down the steps. Chris believed me when I said Sara was alive, but he’d felt he should be at the service since he was her family. Tristan decided not to come to the service. He said he couldn’t bear to watch Sara’s friends and family grieve her when she was still alive.
Chris looked my way as he walked to his bike, but he didn’t come over. I think he knew the last thing I wanted in that moment was company.
I stood there a few minutes longer, watching the church empty of mourners. When the last strains of organ music filled the air, I turned and walked away.
* * *
The wharf was deserted when I started my stroll down to the end of it. No doubt it was because of the cold wind that formed little whitecaps on the water and buffeted the waterfront.
I didn’t mind the cold; in fact, I welcomed it because it let me have this spot to myself. Of all the places in New Hastings, this was where I felt closest to Sara. I could see why she loved it here. I’d never been a sentimental person, but lately I found myself looking at things and seeing them through her eyes. She’d probably laugh if she could hear my thoughts now.
I turned my back on the water and faced the waterfront where a handful of people went about their business. Life here had settled back into its normal quiet routine in the three weeks since Sara disappeared. Erik’s team was back in Boston, trying to track down the sudden flow of the demon drug heffion into the city. A few days ago, Tristan had finally called back the extra unit he’d sent to help with the search for Sara. Only Chris and I stayed in Maine, and he split his time between here and Portland.
From my vantage point, I could see Sara’s building at the end of the waterfront. Nate and I had gotten to know each other in recent weeks, and I’d grown to admire and respect him. We talked about his days in the military before his injury and his transition to a much quieter life in New Hastings. He’d confided in me how he’d been scared to death when Sara came to live with him after her father was killed. He’d had no idea how to raise a child, but he’d never regretted his decision. It was easy to see where Sara got her courage and compassion.
I stuck my hands in my pockets and started walking back the way I’d come. When I reached the waterfront, I turned right toward my hotel, but changed my mind and came about. I felt oddly restless, even more than usual, and I didn’t want to spend the next few hours holed up in my hotel room.
I checked the time on my phone as I walked toward Nate’s. He had invited me to dinner, but that was two hours away. He was doing a bit better lately, but he still looked like he wasn’t sure what to do with his life now. Maybe I’d drop by early and –
My Mori fluttered.
The air left my lungs, and I froze mid-stride. Not a minute had gone by since that day on the cliff that I hadn’t longed to feel that sensation again. But when the heart wants something so bad, the mind will play tricks on you.
I took another step.
Nothing.
Two more steps.
My Mori shifted and pressed forward. Solmi?
My heart began to race. In seconds, I stood outside Nate’s door, my hand on the knob. I opened the door and inhaled sharply as her essence surrounded me, filling the empty place inside me.
My Mori’s cry of joy was followed by a fierce surge of possessiveness as it sensed our mate. It was all I could do to stay in control as I walked down the hallway to the kitchen.
I stood in the doorway and stared at the girl sitting on a chair with her arms cradling her head on the table. Her long chestnut hair spilled across her arms, hiding her face, but I’d know her anywhere.
She stirred and lifted her head. “How did he take –?”
Her eyes met mine, and I forgot how to speak.
“Nikolas,” she whispered.
My chest constricted as a storm of emotions battered me. She’s home; she’s safe, I said half to myself and half to calm the demon straining to get to her. Holding on to my control by a thread, I spoke more sharply than I meant to.
“Where were you?”
She flinched and hugged herself. “Don’t look at me like that. It’s not like I stabbed myself and jumped off the damn cliff!”
Her pain hit me, and my Mori ceased its struggle. In the next heartbeat, I was on my knees in front of her, touching her face and drowning in her shimmering green eyes.
All these weeks, I’d thought of the things I’d say to her when I found her, but I forgot every one of them when she burst into tears. I gathered her to me and wrapped my arms around her shaking body. Burying my face in her hair, I breathed in her scent and felt my world right itself again.
Her sobs became quiet hiccups, and still I couldn’t let her go.
“Pozhaluysta, prosti menya,” I pleaded hoarsely. “I promised to keep you safe, and I didn’t. I’m sorry.”
“No.” She pulled away, and I forced myself to let her go. “If you hadn’t shown up when you did, Eli would have…”
“Don’t think about that.” She’d suffered enough at the hands of that bastard. I wasn’t going to let him torment her from the grave.
My shock over her sudden reappearance began to wear off, leaving one burning question. Where had she been all these weeks?
“We’ve been searching that area ever since you disappeared. Where were you?”
“Seelie,” she answered quietly.
My brows drew together. I could not have heard that right. “Come again?”
“Turns out I have friends there.” Her teary smile was like the sun, driving away the darkness that had hovered over this place since she’d disappeared. “It’s kind of complicated.”
“Why does that not surprise me?” Something told me I needed to sit for this one, so I grabbed the closest chair and pulled it over in front of hers.
“Well, let’s have it. I’m dying to know how a Mori demon ends up in a world where no demon would dare to tread.”
She smiled. “Well, it all started the day I met a sylph… Actually no, it started before that with my great-great-great-great-grandmother.”
I stared at her, and her mouth turned down.
“Look, I told you it was complicated.”
“I’m sorry.” I had no idea what she’d been through in the last three weeks, and the last thing I wanted to do was cause her more distress.
She chewed her lip. “I’m honestly not sure where to start. Just before I met you, a sylph came to visit me.”
My mouth fell open, and she nodded. “I know. Believe me, I was pretty surprised to see an elemental outside my house. She told me her name was Aine, but she never said what she wanted. We talked for a few minutes about my healing power, and then she left.”
Her eyes darkened. “I remember falling off the cliff and hitting the water, and then I woke up in a bed in a strange room with vines on the walls and a dirt floor. Aine came in and told me I was in Seelie. She said some selkies found me in the water and called for her help. Aine said only Fae magic could heal me, so they had to take me to Faerie. I-I guess I was in pretty bad shape.”
I knew the exact moment they had taken her. I’d never forget how it felt when she vanished in that cove.
Nate came into the kitchen as she spoke. He had the look of a man who had been given a miracle and was afraid to believe it was real. I knew exactly how he felt.
“Aine told me my great-great-great-great-grandmother, Sahine, was undine. Sahine chose to become mortal, and married a human. Only females can be undine, and all of her descendants were male and human – until me. That’s where my healing power comes from. I inherited it from Sahine.”
My mind spun, and it was all I could do to hide my shock. Sara was part Fae? She had Fae magic and a Mori demon inside her. How was that possible? I’d seen a demonstration of her magic when she’d healed Roland. A demon could never withstand that kind of power. Yet somehow hers had.
Things I’d puzzled over began to make sense. In particular, Sara’s unprecedented control of her Mori. She must use her power to keep the demon subdued without harming it. I wondered if she even knew she was doing it.
It also explained why she didn’t appear to feel our bond like she should. I didn’t know what this would mean for us. With proper training, she could become comfortable with her demon. Or she might never open herself up to her Mori.
“Aine didn’t want me to leave Seelie,” Sara said, jerking me from my thoughts. “She said demons won’t be happy to have a half Fae around.”
Nate paled in alarm. “You didn’t tell me that part. Does this mean you’re in more danger?”
“No,” I stated with firm conviction. “Because we will keep her safe this time.”
“So she’s safe here?”
I turned to face Nate. “I have not lied to you since we met, and I won’t start now. Until we track down Eli’s master, Sara is not safe anywhere except with the Mohiri.”
He frowned. “But what if –?”
“I know you don’t know much about us, but Sara has family among the Mohiri and they would never harm her. And you would be welcome there as well.”
Sara’s hand touched mine, sending warmth up my arm.
“Really?” she asked hopefully.
Nate shook his head, and her smile disappeared. “Thank you, that is very generous,” he told me regretfully. “But I can’t just pick up and leave. I have a new book coming out and a book tour to plan. And truthfully, I don’t think I would be comfortable living among people who all look like twenty-year-olds.”
“But you could be in danger if the vampires come back,” Sara argued fearfully.
“Everyone – including the vampires – thinks you are dead,” Nate replied. “If they were coming back, they would have done it by now.”
I nodded. “He’s right. As long as we get you out of here before anyone discovers the truth, Nate should be safe.”
“But I just got back.” Tears glittered in her eyes when she looked at him. “I don’t want to leave you.”
“I don’t want you to go, but I would feel better knowing you’re safe,” he said in a reassuring voice. “And it’s not like we can’t talk on the phone whenever you want. I’ll even come for Christmas if the Mohiri celebrate it.”
“We do, and Thanksgiving too,” I told them. Her eyes widened, and I smiled. “We are not as different as you think we are.”
I watched the play of emotions across her face before she averted her gaze. Even then, I could sense the struggle within her.
Standing, she walked to the window, and I noticed her thin yellow dress and bare feet for the first time. They made her seem smaller, almost fragile, though I knew she was stronger than she appeared. She was afraid to leave what she knew behind, but she would do it to protect the man she loved as a father.
She set her shoulders and spoke without looking away from the window. “I’ll go.”
I sighed inaudibly as relief washed over me. “You’re making the right decision.”
“I know.” Her voice barely rose above a whisper. “Why do the right things have to be so hard?”
Nate looked at me and gave a slight nod in her direction. I’d admitted weeks ago to caring for his niece, but the man was no fool. He could see there was more between us.
I walked over to stand beside her, just close enough for our arms to touch. “Do you trust me?”
She had to tilt her head to look up at me. “Yes.”
I laid my hand over her smaller one on the counter. “It’ll be different, but you’ll like it there once you get used to it.”
She loved being outdoors, and I couldn’t wait to see her reaction to the mountains and woods around Westhorne. After seeing her overflowing bookcases upstairs, I had a feeling she was also going to like the library Tristan had spent years building.
“You’ll be able to talk to Nate and your friends as much as you want, and they can visit you there. You already know Chris and me, and you have Mohiri family as well.”
Her hand tensed. “Madeline’s father? I don’t think I’m ready to…”
“Don’t worry. He understands, and he’ll give you all the time you need.”
It would hurt Tristan not to be able to be there for her when she arrived, but his granddaughter’s happiness was more important to him.
She was quiet for a moment. “You and Chris live there too?”
“Yes, when we’re not on a job.” For the last few years, I’d been on the road more than I was at Westhorne. Suddenly, the idea of spending more time at home was very appealing. I’d talk to Tristan about that when we got there.
Our eyes were drawn to the window when a familiar blue car screeched to a stop outside. Roland and Peter jumped out, and we could hear their feet pounding on the stairs.
Sara let out a sound that was between a laugh and a sob and ran to meet them in the hallway. I smiled as they burst through the front door and Roland swung her up into a rib-crushing hug.
My Mori growled at the sight of another male touching Sara, even though it had accepted Roland as her friend.
“I need to make a call. I’ll be right outside,” I told Sara as I moved toward the front door. I was reluctant to let her out of my sight so soon after getting her back, but I could see she was close to being overwhelmed by everything.
I closed the door behind me and leaned against it, allowing my guard to drop for the first time since I’d walked into the kitchen. I let out a shaky breath as I looked up at the cloudless sky.
Thank you.
My chest felt light when I took out my phone and dialed Tristan’s number. He was heading to the Council meeting in India today, and I hoped he hadn’t left already.
“Nikolas, you just caught me,” he said when he answered. “I was about to walk out the door.”
I didn’t beat around the bush. “I have news.”
The line went silent for a moment. “Is she…?”
“She’s back, Tristan. She’s safe.”
“What?” His voice shook. “How…? You found her?”
“She came home on her own. I’ll explain it when I see you. It’s not something we can discuss over the phone.”
“Is she okay?”
I laughed gruffly. “She’s perfect, and I’m bringing her home.”
Tristan exhaled. “The plane will be there in a few hours. I’ll notify the Council that I’ll be a day or two late for the meetings. I wish I could cancel my trip,” he said regretfully.
We both knew he wouldn’t. The Council oversaw crucial Mohiri business, and they couldn’t put their job on hold because too much depended on them. The safety and prosperity of our people came above the personal lives of the Council members. It was a vow they took when they joined the Council.
“We’ll stay here tonight and leave tomorrow,” I told him. “Sara returned only an hour ago, and she’s dealing with a lot. She needs a night with Nate.”
“He’s welcome here as well.”
“I told them that, but he wants to stay in Maine. He’ll visit during the holidays.”
“I look forward to meeting him,” Tristan replied sincerely. It sounded like he was typing on his keyboard. The man was always busy. “I’m sending word to the pilot to change his flight plan. Do you have enough security there tonight?”
“I’m calling Erik’s team back from Boston as backup until we get on the plane. Chris is in Portland, so he can be here in an hour. I’m also going to ask Maxwell to provide protection. Two of her werewolf friends are already inside with her.”
“Are you sure it’s safe for her to stay in the apartment after what happened?”
I looked down at several blackened spots on the landing, a burnt offering from the last unwelcome person who tried to enter the apartment.
“The building is warded with troll magic, so it’s the safest location for her tonight.”
“Troll magic,” he repeated in wonder. “My granddaughter is an extraordinary person. I’m eager to get to know her.”
“Yes, she is.” My smile dimmed. “I need to tell you she’s still not ready to meet her Mohiri family. She needs a little time to adjust first.”
“I understand,” he said sadly. “I only want her to be happy.”
“We’ll make sure she is.”
He cleared his throat. “Does Sara know yet about the bond?”
I rubbed my jaw. “No. I’m going to wait until we get to Westhorne and give her some time to settle in first.” I needed to think of the best way to broach the delicate subject with her. She trusted me and I believed she cared for me, but was she ready to see me as more than a protector and a friend?
“That’s a wise idea,” Tristan said. “I know you’ll do what is best for her.”
“I will,” I replied roughly. I would do whatever it took to ensure her happiness.
“Well, I need to call the Council and inform them I’ll be late because my granddaughter is coming home,” he said, and I could tell he wore a wide smile. “I’ll see you and Sara tomorrow, my friend.”
“Tomorrow.”
