Chris pulls into the driveway at Ash’s place. My pulse jumps as I look for some indication that Tyler is home, but he usually parks in the garage, and the light on inside could mean anyone is there.
“Thanks for dinner,” I say as I unbuckle.
He tangles his hand in my hair and brings his face closer like he’s going to kiss me. “It was good to finally spend some real time with you.”
“Yeah,” I squeak. My nerves ramp up as I glance at the house again.
“I should get inside.”
“Wait.” He stops me and his eyes widen with excitement. “Before I forget, my buddies are booking spring break tickets. Four nights, Cancun, the beach. What do you say?”
“Oh, um, I don’t know.”
“I know money is tight. I will cover the hotel.”
“That is really generous, but I can’t let you do that. Besides, I have work.”
“I checked. Park Academy is on break that week too.”
“I meant with Everly and Tyler. The Wildcats probably have a game.”
“You can’t be serious. He’s not even paying you.”
He would be if I’d let him. “I made a commitment and I’m going to honor that. I’m sorry.”
He sits back in his seat and runs a hand through his hair. “All right. I get it, I guess. Maybe we can go sometime this summer. Just the two of us.”
I nod but if I’m honest with myself I have no desire to go now or this summer. Not with him anyway. My stomach sinks. “Actually, no. This isn’t working, Chris. I wanted it to. You’re a great guy.”
“You’re breaking up with me?”
“I’m sorry.”
“I know we agreed to do casual, but I really like you.”
“I like you too, but I have to be honest, and I don’t think this is going anywhere. It’s not you. It’s me, I swear.”
“The ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ speech. Ouch. Heard that before.”
“I’m sorry.” I move closer and hug him, then get out of the car.
I walk slowly up to the house, glancing back just once to offer a sympathetic smile. My stomach is in knots, but I know I made the right decision. Being with Chris has never felt anywhere close to what it felt like with Tyler. Then or now.
Downstairs is quiet, but the lights are on. I think I hear music in Ash’s room.
I go straight upstairs. Tugging my hair down from my ponytail, I moan my relief and massage my scalp with my fingertips. I toss my purse on my bed, kick off my shoes, and glance toward the bathroom. It’s dark, but Tyler’s door is open, and his light is on. He walks into the bathroom while I’m still staring in that direction.
Shirtless, jeans unbuttoned, he’s got a shirt in one hand and the other is running through his messy hair when he spots me.
I squeak and turn around so fast I get a little dizzy. “Sorry, I didn’t realize you were home.”
“Same,” he says. His voice sounds a lot less affected than mine.
Still facing the other direction, I hear him walk toward me.
“I’m decent.”
Slowly, I turn back. He stands inside my room looking too good to be real. Mostly I’ve seen him in workout clothes, shorts, sweats, T-shirts, that kind of thing, occasionally a pair of jeans that I’m pretty sure he had when we were together four years ago, but tonight he’s wearing a cream sweater that stretches over his broad chest and a pair of black jeans that hug his muscular legs.
His bare feet move a step closer. “Do I look ridiculous?”
“No.” The word comes out raspy. I find myself reaching out to smooth my hand down his bicep. It’s something I did a million times when we were together, but as soon as I do it now, I wish I hadn’t.
He feels different and I want to run my fingers up and down his arm until I know his body as well as I once did.
“Everly picked it out for me. She seems to think my wardrobe needs an update.”
“Still adverse to shopping, huh?”
I pull away, but I swear my fingers tingle as I drop my hand to my side.
“Not completely true. I like shopping for shoes.” His mouth pulls into a playful smile, and he looks down at his feet and wiggles his toes.
When he looks up, he stares at me more intently. “How was your date?”
“It was fine.” I can’t get the words we broke up out of my mouth. I haven’t even fully processed it myself.
“What’s he like?”
“Chris?”
His chin dips.
“He’s nice.” My voice wavers. “He’s a fan of yours, actually.” Or was. I might have just earned Tyler one less fan in this city.
“Well, I’m not a fan of his.” His lips press into a firm line. “Sorry. That was out of line. If you’re happy then I’m glad.”
He leaves, walking back through the bathroom between our rooms and then closing his door.
My heart is galloping in my chest, and for a fraction of a second I consider going after him.
Oh, this isn’t good.
The next afternoon, River picks up Everly from school, so I stay a little later and work on grading and lesson plans. When I finally make it back to the house, the kitchen is filled with half the Wildcats’ roster.
“P. Vaughn!” Ash calls. “You’re just in time.”
“Time for what?” I ask with a hesitant smile.
“Family dinner. We’ve got burgers, hot dogs, steak, or chicken.”
I scan the island where plates of food are piled up. In addition to the meat there are several side dishes and even dessert.
“I’m okay. I have some leftovers in the fridge.” I move to get it, and Ash steps in the way.
Tyler appears beside me. He hands me an empty plate. “Resistance is futile.”
“I tried to get out of it too.” Everly hops down from the chair where she was sitting in front of the island.
“I said River could stay,” Tyler says.
“Yeah, right, like he would want to sit around while you guys glare at him any time he breathes too close.”
The corner of Tyler’s mouth twitches with amusement.
“Ladies first,” Jack says. He extends a plate to Everly, and she starts us off.
Leo gets in line behind me.
“Where’s Scarlett?” I ask.
“Still at work.”
It would be nice to have another girl here to talk to. Not that the guys aren’t all nice, but holy flock of hockey players. This is intense.
Once we all have food, we sit around the dining room table. It sits twelve comfortably, but they’ve pulled more chairs up to accommodate everyone. The guys all fall quiet as they dig in. Tyler takes the seat next to me and catches me staring at this odd yet very homey-vibe family dinner.
“It’s a lot, right?”
“Yeah. The last time I gathered around a table with this many people was…never mind, I don’t think I ever have.”
“I thought the same when I joined the team. Even with extended family at holidays, our gatherings were half this.”
I nod my agreement.
“How’s your family doing?” he asks, and then takes a bite of his chicken sandwich.
“They’re okay. My parents moved upstate. Do you still keep in touch with Uncle Tim?”
“Oh yeah. Luke too.”
I smile at the mention of my cousin Luke. “He’s getting married this summer.”
“I heard.”
We fall quiet after that, and I feel out of place again. The rest of the table has finally started to talk between bites, too, and the noise around us puts me and Tyler in our own little bubble since neither of us are talking to anyone else.
His body is angled toward me slightly, and when I glance over at him for reassurance, he smiles. “Are you enjoying teaching?”
“Depends on the day.”
He chuckles and my nerves dissipate. This is Tyler. I can do this. We have never had a problem communicating. We used to talk on the phone for hours, but I’m all too aware of how close he is. If I moved my leg a fraction, it’d be flush against his.
We find safe topics to talk about. I tell him about student teaching and then ask him about hockey. Before I know it, the guys are pushing back from the table for seconds or dessert, then they trickle out to the game room.
I set my napkin in the middle of my plate.
“Are you done?” Tyler asks.
“Yeah. I can’t remember the last time I ate so much.”
He takes my plate and his, and I follow him back to the kitchen.
“Sneaking out?” he asks when I step toward the stairs.
“I need to shower and get a few things ready for tomorrow.”
He invades my space and I stop breathing. His right hand lifts and stretches toward me as if he’s going to caress my face. I don’t move. I lock my gaze on his. I can read everything in his expression. He wants me. He’s made no attempt at hiding it, and a large part of me wants him too.
His fingers glide across my cheek, and then he holds out a single finger in front of me with an eyelash. “Make a wish, Pipes.”
My pulse slows as I realize he isn’t going to kiss me. Of course, he isn’t. He thinks I have a boyfriend.
I blow the eyelash off his finger, but I don’t make a wish. Making a wish without knowing exactly what you want is a dangerous thing. And I have no idea if I’m ready to give Tyler another chance.
Everly gets in my car the next morning to go to school. She has a Pop-Tart in one hand and an energy drink in the other.
I cast a sidelong glance at her breakfast of choice.
“I know, I know. Tyler already lectured me. I didn’t sleep well.” She pulls on a pair of sunglasses as I back out of the driveway.
“Is everything okay?” I ask, trying to sound casual about it. If I’ve learned anything about Everly, it’s that the second you make it out to be a big deal, she shuts down and says nothing.
“Stupid school stuff.”
“I love stupid school stuff.”
She snorts. “Of course, you do.”
She takes a bite of her Pop-Tart and chews it before elaborating. “I think I might want to go to college.”
“Really?” I can’t help my surprise. The only thing she ever says about school is how it sucks.
“I mean, it has to suck less than high school, right?”
I nod. “Yeah. It does. I promise. I think it’s great you want to go to college.”
“No, it isn’t great,” she says. “My grades aren’t that good, and I don’t have any extracurriculars or references. Plus, deadlines for a lot of places have already passed.”
“Plenty of good schools are still taking applications for this fall. I can help you look if you want.”
“What about my grades and lack of interest in…everything else?”
I smile. “I can help you with that too.”
As soon as we get to school, I take her to see Paul, the theater director, or Mr. Hall as the kids know him. He looks hesitant at first. I can’t totally blame him since she destroyed his backdrops, but when I remind him how good the new ones turned out and how talented Everly is with a paintbrush, he agrees to let her join the stage crew.
I knew I could convince him. Plus, I happen to know he lost two kids last week. One moved and I have no idea what happened to the other.
“We meet after school until five. Don’t be late,” he says with a smile that somehow makes his mouth turn down at the corners.
“Thank you,” Everly says as we walk back to my class. She pulls on the sleeve of her shirt in an anxious sort of way. “I will ask Tyler if he can pick me up, so you don’t have to wait.”
“It’s fine. I have plenty of things I can work on while I wait for you.” I reach out and squeeze her arm. “You’re going to be great.”
I have an extra bounce in my step all day. I’m excited that Everly is looking toward her future, and I can’t wait to tell Tyler. I almost texted him during my lunch break but decided to wait until tonight.
I get to the gym a few minutes before rehearsal is done. I stand next to the side door that leads out to the parking lot to wait for her. The stage sits at one end of the basketball court and the boys’ team is warming up on the other end.
They’re doing The Wizard of Oz and the lead actress has a voice that gives me goosebumps even with all the extra noise and commotion going on.
Everly has her back to me, off on one corner by herself, but I don’t think much of it until Mr. Hall dismisses them. She bolts so fast.
Her eyes are red and watery.
“Oh my gosh. Are you crying?” I ask.
She cuts a glare in my direction and pushes past me out the door. I hear someone snicker, and look up to see a group of kids watching her leave. Rage fills my entire being, but I know making a scene will just make things worse for her.
I hurry to catch up with her and don’t say a word until we’re a block away from the school.
“Those kids are jerks.”
“Most are,” she says, sounding tired and numb.
“I’m sure it’s just because you’re new. In a day or two, they’ll move on.”
“I’m not giving it a day or two. Thank you for your help and everything, but who was I kidding? I’m not a theater geek, and I’m not going to college. That’s not who I am.”
“You can be whoever you want.”
She raises her chin defiantly. “I’m already good with who I am.”
