We start with dinner at my favorite local spot. Before this whole thing blew up in my face, I’d already invited a couple of girls from the office and three friends from high school that I’ve kept in semi-regular contact with since graduation to join us for the first stop on my bachelorette party. None of them know the truth about my engagement or that Sam bowed out. It’s fine, though, I don’t feel like talking about it tonight anyway.
After dinner, Scarlett, Piper, Dakota and I head for Milwaukee in the ridiculous pink Hummer. We dance and laugh the entire way there, and before I know it, the driver is pulling up to the first bar. I changed into an appropriately skimpy dress for the occasion, and after two glasses of champagne, I’m more than ready to have a good time.
I have done a lot of research on engagement and wedding traditions. I’ve jumped in feet first to things like attending bridal runway shows and researching ceremony locations everywhere from churches to inside a helicopter. The options are endless and most of the wedding planning seemed like a lot of extra effort in the name of marriage.
But bachelor and bachelorette parties make perfect sense to me. A final hurrah to single life, out on the town with your best friends? Yes, please!
Everywhere we go, heads turn. My friends are hot, but I think it’s the bright pink sashes they’re wearing, combined with the cheap veil on my head, that is getting us noticed. Everyone loves a bachelorette party.
As with everything else, I did a lot of combing through ideas and Pinterest boards for this weekend. In the end, I told Scarlett I wanted the full-on, tackiest, most epic of bachelorette parties. To say she came through would be an understatement.
Piper holds open the door to the next bar and then hands each of us a piece of paper as we pass by her.
“What is this?” I ask.
“Now that we’re all good and tipsy, it’s time to start the scavenger hunt.” She shakes her cleavage, which is on point in a slinky dress that would make her fiancé, Tyler’s eyes pop out of his head.
Scarlett orders a round of shots while Piper goes over the rules. There are fifteen tasks. For each one we complete, we get points, but the points don’t really matter. The objective is to embarrass me and get a lot of laughs in the process. Oh, and get photographic evidence. Scarlett is all over that. She’s been snapping pics from minute one.
“Which one should we do first?” Dakota asks me.
I glance over the list. It’s exactly the kind of stuff I would expect: get a free drink from a stranger, do a blow job shot, make a toast, dance on the bar, etc. I am here for all of it. This is exactly what I need to forget about Sam and work for a few hours. He still hasn’t called, and it hurts worse than thinking about walking down the aisle alone.
Lifting my shot glass, I smile at my friends. “A toast to the best friends a girl could ask for and a night I’ll never forget.”
They each grab a shot and lift it in the air. “Cheers!”
For the next two hours, I focus on the scavenger hunt. I love a good to-do list. I get a condom from a guy, take a picture with a police officer, use a cheesy pick-up line on another random guy, and dance on top of the bar.
I’m living my best life until we stumble into a country bar with sad music blasting on the jukebox and couples dancing. I’m several drinks in, not to mention the shots, and for some reason, it all finally hits me.
I’m at my bachelorette party, and I don’t even know if I still have a fiancé. I excuse myself to go to the bathroom. Scarlett eyes me curiously, as if she can feel me spiraling.
The music is quieter in here and somehow that makes more room for all the negative thoughts to crowd back into my mind. I brace my hands on the sink and take a few deep breaths. Scarlett walks in and I stand tall and start to wash my hands.
“Are you okay?” My best friend adjusts the veil on my head.
“Of course. I’m having a great time.”
“Don’t gaslight me. The second we walked in this bar, something shifted. I felt it.”
“Why can’t I marry you?” I give her a pouty face. “You see me more than anyone else. Plus, you’re smoking hot.”
She kisses the air. “Right back at you.”
A groan escapes and Scarlett wraps her arms around me.
“I’m sorry.” I let my head rest on her shoulder.
“Why are you sorry?” she asks.
“You planned this epic night and I’m hiding in the bathroom.”
“Oh please. You think I didn’t expect at least one breakdown?” She pulls back, opens her purse, and pulls out a bag of Skittles.
If I were the crying type, I’d be in tears. Also, I think I already used up my quota this week.
“You really do know me better than anyone.” I take them from her and clutch them to my chest. Scarlett is my soul sister.
“Still haven’t heard from Sam?”
“Not a word, and Melody made it very clear that I’m either getting married this weekend or I’m finding myself a new job.”
“Oh, honey.” She rubs my shoulder. “What can I do?”
“Agree to marry me so I don’t have to beg some guy off the street to be my groom.”
“Is that what Melody told you to do?”
“More or less.”
“That would be insane. Please tell me you told her no.”
“It’s not going to come to that. Sam and I are going to work this out. I love him and he loves me.” Or he said he did. But if he loved me, why is he not answering my calls so we can talk and make up? I let out a long breath. “Okay, I’m ready. I’m saving these for later.”
“Really?” She shakes her purse. “I wasn’t expecting it to be this easy. I have other tricks up my sleeve.”
“Yes. I will worry about all this tomorrow, when I’m hungover and hating my life decisions. Tonight, let’s go boot scoot and boogie!” I shove the candy in my clutch. Those will taste even more delicious later.
“Damn, I’m good,” she mutters as I tug her along behind me.
The rest of our group is already on the dance floor. The music has changed to something more upbeat. We dance until sweat trickles down my neck and the smile is back on my face.
“I need water!” Dakota yells over the music and fans her face.
“Me too.”
The others stay. We squeeze into an open space at the bar, and while we wait for our drinks, she turns to face me.
“This is fun.” She moves her hips to the beat. “I never had a bachelorette party.”
“You didn’t?”
“No.” She chuckles softly. “Maverick and I got married on a drunken whim in Vegas.”
“What?!” My jaw drops. “Seriously?”
“Yep.”
“That’s sort of awesome.”
“It actually was, but it did mean I missed things like this.”
“Then you absolutely need a turn wearing the veil.” I slide the clip out of my hair.
“Oh no.” She lifts a hand to stop me.
“You have to. I insist.”
Dakota looks like she’s going to protest again until I get the veil on her head. Then a big grin takes over her face.
The bartender sets our drinks, two waters and two shots of Fireball, down on the bar. He smiles at Dakota. “Getting married, huh?”
She glances at me before nodding.
“Congrats,” he says. “These are on the house, and if you need one last fling…” He trails off and then winks.
“Damn. This thing is magical.” She hands me a shot and takes the other.
“Maverick would kill him,” I say, in case she’s considering it.
“Oh, I know. Besides, it wouldn’t compare.”
“How do you mean?”
She smiles and seems to consider her words before she speaks. “You know how people always say they can’t imagine sleeping with one person for the rest of their life?”
I nod.
“After the first time I had sex with Johnny, I couldn’t imagine having sex with anyone else.”
“He’s that good?”
Her face flushes. “So good. Life changingly good. He completes me in ways I didn’t think was possible.”
I twist the empty glass around in my hand before setting it on the bar. Sex with Sam is good, but I’ve never described it as life-changing. And I’ve absolutely never heard someone say the words “he completes me” and not wanted to gag. But there is something in the way that Dakota says it that is so sincere, I get another one of those twinges of sadness.
“I’m sorry. We’re coming up on our one-year anniversary and it has me all sappy.” She tips her glass. “Plus, too much alcohol always makes me want to get naked.”
“I could help with that.” The guy next to her leans in closer.
We both start to laugh, but then a deep voice interrupts, “Like hell you will.”
