barged into Alessa’s bedroom without knocking. “Tonight when we go out, I want you to wear something real sexy. I already have some guys lined up. These are people I can trust. So I ain’t worried you’re gonna get hurt.”
Alessa pretended to pay attention to him, but nothing he said mattered any longer. Helped by his sister, she would be long gone. She stared silently at him as he droned on. But with every word that emerged from his pie hole, her mind was screaming, I hate you, I hate you, I hate you!
Tasha came over at dinnertime, and the two girls went out for a quick bite. They went over their plan again. Tasha told her that a cab would be waiting for her. She should get in and take it to Broad Street, where another cab would be waiting to take her to the corner of Juniper and Arch Streets in Philadelphia. There she would find a homeless shelter that took in women and children. Tasha assured her it would be a safe place to stay. Alessa was immensely grateful to her for all the help she provided. The two would miss each other a lot once they parted, but they realized it wouldn’t be safe for them to be in touch because if Harlin found out they had worked together to thwart his plans, he would kill them both.
As promised, Harlin yelled for Alessa to come out at nine o’clock that evening. When she stepped into the living room, he looked her over carefully. She was wearing a red midriff top with black shorts that sat on her hip bones. At Harlin’s command, she turned around. The shorts were revealing. Her five-inch black patent leather boots rose to a point right above her knees. Harlin nodded with approval.
“Let’s get going,” he said. “I have your first client set for nine thirty, but I want you out there for others to have a long, hard look at you. Once you’re done with the first guy, they’ll be rushing to line up for their turn.”
Alessa nodded, confirming that she had understood his point. When they got out on the street, Harlin told her exactly where to stand. “When the first guy shows up, you take him up that alley,” he directed, pointing to one midway down the block.
Alessa got out of the car and stood on the sidewalk. Before driving off, Harlin told her he was going to score some weed and would be back. He assured her there was no need to worry about her first customer since he knew him well.
Once he had pulled out and disappeared down the street, Alessa headed toward the location where Tasha had told her the first cab would be waiting. When she got there, Tasha was standing by the cab, waiting anxiously for her. Tears streamed down Tasha’s cheeks as she handed Alessa her duffel bag. They embraced in silence, too overwhelmed by the moment to speak.
Alessa got in the cab and rolled down the window. “Tasha,” she murmured tearfully, “I love you. I’ll never forget you.”
As the cab pulled away, she realized that although Harlin had turned out to be another nightmare, she would always remain connected to his sister.
Reaching Broad Street, the driver pulled up behind a second cab. Alessa got out and climbed into the other cab. This time, the driver took her to the corner of Juniper and Arch Streets. She paid the driver and stepped out into the cool night air. She looked around at the buildings and took in the people walking by on the streets—all appearing to have a normal life. She headed up Arch Street, as Tasha had directed her to, and noticed a large brick building decorated with a bright floral mural on its side. Not until she reached its front door did she discover that the mural belonged to her final destination—the Eliza Shirley Shelter. Like many buildings, its windows were guarded by thick iron bars, but at least it looked safe.
Alessa climbed the steps, then murmured a quick prayer, before walking in. She hoped she had done the right thing by coming here. She pressed a small button to the right of the door, heard a buzzer go off inside, and waited anxiously for something to happen. Finally, after what seemed like five minutes, she heard the door’s inside lock click open. She pushed through and headed up the stairs. There she found a small, stout woman sitting behind a gray metal desk. Alessa’s eyes met hers. The woman’s serene expression exuded a deeply reassuring quality as she approached her visitor and introduced herself as Sam, the night manager.
“Short for Samantha,” she explained. “And how are you tonight, honey?” she went on. “You doing all right?”
Standing in front of Sam in her skimpy outfit, Alessa was surprised by the woman’s nonjudgmental attitude. Had Alessa been wearing a Chanel suit, she would have treated her in the same manner. She relaxed immediately as the tension of her escape from Harlin seeped out of her.
“My name is Alessa,” she told Sam. “I don’t have anywhere to stay tonight and was wondering . . . hoping that I might be able to stay here.”
Sam’s smile dipped. She took Alessa’s hand in hers. “I’d love to help you out, but we can’t take anyone in after 10 p.m. It’s already eleven o’clock. I feel like breaking the rules for you, but I can’t. But listen, I want you to come back here tomorrow morning at eight. The day manager, Ebby, will be here. Tell her I told you to come back, okay?”
Visibly disappointed and worried about where she would go that late at night, Alessa had no choice but to sheepishly agree. “I’d like to change out of these clothes. Is there a bathroom I can use? I don’t want to be out on the streets tonight dressed like this. Please?”
Sam had worked at the Eliza Shirley Shelter for almost twenty years. She knew of the hardships people like Alessa had endured. Reaching over, she hugged her.
“Of course,” she said. “Let’s go to the shower room. You can take a quick, hot shower and change out of your clothes.”
Alessa followed Sam down a long hallway and into the shower room. It was well-lit and clean. Sam handed her a towel and pointed her toward the shower.
“I’ll stay out here on the bench. I can’t leave anyone who isn’t a resident unattended,” she explained apologetically.
Alessa was relieved that Sam would be nearby as she showered in this unfamiliar place. As she allowed the water to stream down her body, panic gripped her again. I need somewhere to stay tonight, she thought. With only three hundred and fifty dollars, she had to be careful how she spent her money.
Anxiety continued to gnaw at her, as she dried herself with a towel and put on a warm baggy jogging suit and sneakers. She thanked Sam for her kindness, and the two headed back to the front entrance. Right before Alessa left, Sam put her hands on her shoulders.
“Remember,” she reminded her, “eight tomorrow morning. Ebby will be waiting for you. I’ll make sure of it. Be safe tonight. And you be careful where you sleep. Don’t eat or drink anything that someone might try to offer you. Eight tomorrow morning, you hear?”
Alessa gave her a small smile and headed down the front steps. Once back on the sidewalk, she reminded herself it was almost midnight. She had only eight more hours to go until she could go back to the shelter. As she headed down Arch Street in search of a safe place to camp out, Alessa noticed the fenced-in parking lot right next to the shelter. With her duffel bag on her back, she climbed over the fence and made her way in. Rows of mostly white vans were parked inside the lot. Alessa headed to the far corner of the building where she would be concealed by the vans. That way, she could stay hidden for the night.
Alessa threw her duffel bag into the corner of the brick building and sat down on the pavement. The hard, cold surface sent a chill through her body, and she pulled her knees up to her chin and huddled for warmth. As alone and scared as she was, she knew she was in a better place. She told herself being outside in the cold, sitting in a parking lot alone, was an improvement on how she had lived over the last nine months. Once her body had grown numb from the cold ground beneath her, she retreated to her mental space. Given the life she had lived from childhood, she feared that after she died, her place would be in hell. She tried to focus on what her life would be like in six months but couldn’t manage to visualize it. All she could think of was this moment and those she had left behind.
The sound of passing cars comforted her as she huddled against the corner of the building. It was a reminder there were other people on earth and that perhaps she wasn’t as alone as she felt. She listened, as the city continued to move even in the dark of night. She heard students, not much older than her, hustling through the cold night air, giggling with glee on their way home from a party. Two homeless men passed by, stopping only to argue over the last swig from a bottle of liquor. The city was alive, but Alessa felt dead.
Then a thought struck her, and she found herself paralyzed with hopelessness. She realized that if she dropped dead, no one would miss her. The harsh reality of her situation overwhelmed her, and fear seized her in its tentacles. She did the only thing she could in the circumstances. She blocked out her thoughts and focused on the darkness so she could sleep.
By six in the morning, an exhausted Alessa had drifted in and out of several short naps. The sun was rising, and with it would come a new life, she told herself. She would do whatever it took to have a better life. By six thirty, Alessa had picked up her duffel bag and climbed back over the fence onto the pavement. She spotted a small café down the block and went in to get breakfast. She figured that on a new day, with the promise of a new life stretching before her, she could at least treat herself to a real breakfast.
The aroma of bacon and freshly brewed coffee greeted her as she pushed open the café door. She ordered a lavish breakfast and silently told herself, before she took her first bite of pancake, Today, I will start my life over. And tomorrow, I will build on today and carry on, in the same way, every day thereafter.
At 8 a.m. sharp, Alessa buzzed her way back inside the Eliza Shirley Shelter. A tall woman with soft, wavy black hair approached her with a big smile. “Let me guess. You’re Alessa, right?”
Alessa smiled broadly. “Yes, I am. I guess Sam told you I was coming?”
“Of course! I’m Ebby, and I am the day manager here. I am also a therapist for the young women who come to stay here. How about some breakfast?”
“No, thank you. I’ve already eaten,” Alessa said politely.
Ebby could see the girl was tired and figured she hadn’t slept well the night before. “Did you stay out on the streets last night?” she asked.
Alessa answered bashfully, “Yes, I did. It was a long night, and I didn’t get much sleep. I was kind of scared something might happen if I fell asleep.”
“Well, come on, then,” Ebby said. “I’ll let you lie down for a couple of hours. When you wake up, we can talk. I’ll get all the information I need from you then. Okay?”
Alessa nodded, unable to prevent the tears from welling up in her eyes. “I’m sorry. I’ve never been in a shelter before. I’m not sure what will happen or how this will help me.”
Ebby put an arm over her shoulders. “First, you sleep. Then we will talk about all the options open to you.”
Ebby led her into a sparsely furnished office. There was a cot set up in the corner of the room. She pointed to it. “Now go and sleep. I’ll be back in a couple of hours. And Alessa, it’s okay to let yourself relax. It’s perfectly safe here.”
