Her pussy tasted like heaven, hell, accomplishment, and failure all wrapped up into one perfect fantasy. I’d grown accustomed to being able to compartmentalize my life, fitting every feeling or person or task into a certain category. With Kee, though, my emotions shot off like damn fireworks in different directions. I’d craved her for so long. Yet having her right then, I knew, was going to ruin me.
Hell, she’d just removed an engagement ring from her finger. It showed me she wanted this as badly as I did. Sure, she was as sweet as I remembered, but now she’d matured into knowing what she wanted as she rocked against my tongue.
The thought of her learning her desires with Ethan fueled my jealousy, my pace, my need to have her. All this time, I could have had her, but instead I’d let another man be with her instead.
I flicked my tongue over her clit and watched her body jerk in response to me. Only me. I still owned a part of her when we were together here like this.
She whimpered and then breathed out, “I only want the real you throughout all this, Dex. Only you.”
That statement had me faltering. Didn’t she know I was colder now? Fiercer. Meaner. She’d done that to me. I undid my belt buckle and pulled my length free. Then I let her feel the cold metal against her pussy.
She gasped and looked over her shoulder. “Is that— You’re pierced?”
“Yeah, Kee.” I felt her slickness drip over my cock and groaned, trying to contain myself.
“Is that going to hurt more?”
“Hurt?” I questioned, shocked all of a sudden by the thought of someone hurting her while screwing her. “I’m going to fuck you so good, it’s going to hurt when I stop, Kee.” I rubbed her clit again.
“Do it, then. Make this real again.” She clawed at the counter as I gripped her hips, not sure if I was pushing her away or getting ready to dive into her.
I wanted this. I needed it. Yet my soul was scared of it. I was scared of having her once and for all. “We were always real, babe. This pussy of yours is so soaked, I’m guessing you’ve been dreaming about having me since the beginning.” I wouldn’t shy away from a fight anymore, and I controlled most everything in my life. I could control this too. I gripped her hair and pulled her stomach up from the counter to spin her around. I made sure she was sitting on the edge, so our faces were just centimeters apart. I wanted to see her when I finally showed her who she’d walked away from. “Keep your eyes on me, Kee. I want you to watch who can fuck you so hard you forget about the good-girl image you’ve built for yourself and see who you always truly belonged to.”
And with that, I plunged into her.
Hard.
She gasped loudly and then whimpered as her eyes widened on me. It wasn’t a sound I was expecting and not at all the sound I wanted. She slapped a hand over her mouth, and her whole body tensed. Her look alone would have had me freezing, yet her body language was even more of a signal to me.
“Kee.” I froze, my cock still in her, bare and throbbing, but I was distinctly aware now that I was in unmarked territory. Fuck. She was breathing hard but not looking at me at all. “Kee, please tell me I’m stretching you because no one has ever come close to being as big as me.” I shifted so I wasn’t holding her so tight, and her eyes shut as a blush rose over her chest and her face.
“No one has come close to being inside me at all, Dex.”
Her whispered confession had me swearing under my breath again even as my cock swelled like it was damn proud. Slick but so tight, the walls of her fought my cock. Suddenly the anger I’d felt before, the jealousy, the rage was gone. All that was left was my concern. “Kee, fuck. Please tell me I didn’t just ruin this. Please tell me you’re… “
“I’m still a virgin. Well, I was. Much more of a good girl than you thought.” She cracked open an eye. “Fuck me like I’m not one though?”
“You’re out of your damn mind.” I started to shift back so I could slide out of her, but her hand shot out to grab my ass behind her.
“Don’t you dare leave me now, Dex.”
“We’re not doing this.” I shook my head, trying to tell my cock that too.
“We are. Just…take me to your bed.”
“If I’d known—”
“If you’d known, then what?” she asked, her eyes burning with anger all of a sudden. “You wanted to fuck me like you hated me. Who cares then, right?”
Both of my hands were on either side of her on the counter now. “Babe, I’m not going to fight with you right now. My cock is so far inside you, I’m scared I’m going to break you, okay?”
She was still holding on to my ass tight though, and when I shifted, she whimpered again. Yet she said, “I’m not going to break. Just carry me to your bed. And don’t pull out of me. Because that will hurt.”
“Keelani, you realize the act of sleeping together requires that I—”
She smacked my shoulder. “Obviously, Dex. I want to lie in a bed and hopefully do it a little less…abruptly.”
My forehead fell to hers and, for a moment, all the tension between us left. “Wrap your legs around me.”
She nodded and bit her lip as she did. I carried her, legs wrapped around my hips, like she was my most fragile possession. I didn’t care about most things other than working and keeping my family proud. Most of my hopes for making the rest of the world a better place died when our town turned its back on me.
“How did we get here, Kee?” I murmured in her ear as her arms wrapped around me.
Tomorrow, I knew we’d be back to arguing, to the awkward conversations, to our separate lives, but tonight, we were connected.
“Well, we got like this because I didn’t tell you.”
“I didn’t ask, either. For some odd reason.” His tone was sarcastic. “I had the idea you’d done this before.”
“Ethan and I never slept together because he didn’t want that and neither did I. He’s been in love with someone for a very long time.”
“With the person he was with tonight.” It made sense. I turned the corner and passed the guest bedroom and the spare office space.
“Yes,” she said softly. “Seems a lot of people found the person they wanted to be with over the years.”
Her eyes searched mine, and I knew she had questions about Seanna and me. With the fact that I’d just stolen her virginity, I offered up the honest truth. “I don’t commit well to anyone. Seanna knows that. She’s fine with it. We’ve… I keep my relationships casual but she’s been casual for a while now.”
Her chocolate eyes searched mine without judgment but I saw confusion too. “How do you not get attached?”
Easy. Someone breaks your heart into such small pieces, you have no attachments left. When I didn’t answer her and kept walking, she changed the subject. “Enough rooms here?”
“It’s a penthouse suite. You’ll feel comfortable.”
She rolled her eyes. “I’m not staying with you, Dex.”
“Of course you are.” I got to the bedroom and shoved open the oak French doors to a room that was all warm tones. “Where else would my fiancée stay?”
“I was actually assigned a lease at an apartment your brother got me near the resort for—’
“My fiancée is going to stay at my place.” I held her ass to me and then turned to sit down on the bed.
“Wait.” She gripped my shoulders and her eyes were wide as she looked around the bedroom. She chewed her cheek before she pointed to the soft, tantric chair in the corner. It had curves and angles I knew how to enjoy. “Maybe we should just sit on that chair? It looks soft and…”
I shook my head. Jesus, she didn’t even know what it was. No way in hell was I having her on a tantric chair for her first time. I breathed out, trying not to imagine her bent over it. I stepped back toward the bed, my cock now throbbing with the feeling of her walls around me. “Trust me. The bed will be easier. I’m going to sit down, okay, Kee?”
She blinked a few times and took a deep breath before she nodded. “You’re very big, Dex. Go slow.”
“Baby, you’re stroking my already large ego with that comment.” I chuckled, but I felt her body start to tighten up. I’d wanted to torture Keelani with the idea of my fucking her being so good, she could never think of anything else; but instead, I feared how rough I handled her would be the way she would remember her virginity being taken. “Heartbreaker, you’re going to have to relax into me and trust me, okay?” She bit her lip, but her legs stayed firmly around me even as I scooted us backward to where she could have moved away. “Can you look at me?”
“I feel like right now isn’t the time for us to stare into each other’s eyes. Let’s just get this over with.”
“I’m not stealing your virginity or getting it over with. Jesus, how am I even your first?”
“Did you honestly think it would be someone else?”
“Yes, Kee. When we walked away from each other, I wanted to walk away for good.”
