Pen
“Let me go, Frederico,” I bite out, trying to control the fear in my voice.
My fingers tighten around the bunch of keys in my hand, the teeth biting into my palm as the Bentley’s internal lights switch off and the central locking system flicks on.
Frederico’s lips press against my ear, and I bite down hard on the inside of my cheek. My nostrils flare as I smell the metallic scent of blood and feel the wet warmth of it as he presses his cheek against mine. “Hmm, I can see why those cocksuckers are so fucked in the head over you, Penelope. I bet you taste just as good as you smell.” His grip tightens around my waist, making it even harder for me to breathe. “Fuck, and the way you move… You’re fucking famous now. Over a million views of your dance, and here I am holding your life in my motherfucking hands,” he says, then licks me.
He fucking licks me.
“Fuck you, arsewipe,” I bite out through my teeth. I will not fucking scream. I refuse to give him the satisfaction. Instead, I concentrate on my Breakers and take comfort that they’re alive. That they’re here.
“Let her go!” Dax snarls as the four of them come to an abrupt stop a few feet away.
Frederico laughs and just grips me tighter. His fingers bite into my upper arm, bruising me as he presses the knife harder against my throat. I can feel the sharp sting of the knife’s edge as it slices into my skin.
“They’ll kill you,” I say through gritted teeth.
“That’s where you’re wrong, Penelope. These fuckers won’t kill me as long as this knife’s pressed against your pretty little throat… Do as I say and maybe you’ll survive the night.”
“Take your motherfucking hands off her now, cunt!” Xeno roars, Dax, Zayn and York flanking him. All three have the cold glint of their rage focused on Frederico, and it’s scary as fuck. They have death in their eyes and blood on their hands. Not one of them has come out of the fight at Rocks unscathed, even Dax has a rapidly swelling cheek, and all of them are covered in blood. It’s splattered across their clothes and skin, the savagery of what must’ve happened in Rocks reflected in the wildness within their eyes.
“Fuck you, prick. Me and Penelope here are gonna take a little ride in your Bentley,” Frederico counters, stepping sideways and dragging me with him.
“You aren’t going anywhere in my car, and you’re a fool if you think we’d let you take our girl,” Dax says, the vein in his forehead popping as he raises his gun and flicks off the safety.
“Don’t even think about it!” Frederico growls, pressing the knife tighter against my throat.
York takes a step closer, a baseball bat gripped in his hand and a crazed look in his eyes. A trickle of blood runs down my skin and this time I can’t help but let out a whimper of pain.
“There’s no way out of this, Frederico. There’s four of us and one of you. Drop the knife and we’ll let you go unharmed,” York negotiates, the calmness he displays is just a cover for the rage he’s feeling. I see it in the ticking of his jaw and the curl of his lip.
“You heard him. Let Pen go and we’ll forget this,” Zayn adds, lowering the bloody knife he’s holding to his side. I watch as crimson droplets slide from the blade’s edge.
Drip. Drip. Drip.
Xeno remains fiercely quiet, like a volcano on the verge of erupting, and I know it’s because the lie won’t fall as easily from his lips. He will kill Frederico the second he gets the chance.
“You really are fucked up over this piece of trash, ain’t ya?” Frederico sneers, his free hand reaching for the car door. He tries the handle, but it’s locked. If he’d paid any attention, he would’ve realised that already. “Unlock it, bitch!”
“No.”
“Unlock it right the fuck now or I will slide this knife across your throat so quickly your Breakers won’t have a chance in hell of saving you. Imagine how they’d feel when the life in your eyes fades away.”
My eyes fill with tears, but I blink them back, refusing to shed one for this bastard. I don’t want to give him what he wants, but I also don’t want my Breakers to witness my death. It will ruin them. They’ll be lost forever.
“Don’t!” Xeno snaps, fixing his gaze on me.
“Do it!” Frederico growls.
I press my thumb on the key fob. The car door unlocks.
“Good girl.”
“Fuck you,” I mutter, stiffening in his hold as Frederico bites my earlobe, then sucks it into his mouth.
Dax looks down the barrel of his gun. “You motherfucking bastard!”
I hear the grin in Frederico’s voice and see the rage burning across my Breakers faces. With the knife still pressed against my throat, Frederico doesn’t open the door straight away, instead his hand circles my waist and moves upwards. I know what he’s about to do and it makes my stomach turn over. “Look at you all going insane over this trashy bit of pussy. I never understood the draw. She ain’t even that pretty.”
“I swear to fuck, you move another fucking inch and I’ll put a bullet between your eyes,” Dax says through gritted teeth. His focus remains on Frederico, his arm is steady, his aim sure, but Frederico isn’t stupid, he uses me as a human shield. Dax won’t be able to get a clear shot. We all know that.
“Try it, dick, and watch your girl bleed out within seconds. All you’ll have left of her is a corpse… Then again, I heard you’re a bunch of twisted fucks these days. Do you want me to kill her so you can fuck her dead body?”
“You piece of shit. I’m gonna have fun gouging your motherfucking eyes out!” Xeno shouts.
Frederico lets out a laugh that verges on hysterical, then grabs my breast over the top of my hoodie and squeezes hard. I cry out again and Xeno roars, jerking towards me. Zayn reaches for him and wraps his arm around his torso, pulling him back as he urgently whispers into his ear. I swallow hard, trying to decipher what he’s saying. Whatever it is, it has the desired effect. Xeno stops struggling. Instead, he eyes Frederico with a calm resolve. The darkness in his eyes grows and for the briefest of moments his gaze flicks behind us before he looks back at me. I see how his fingers unfurl a little, some of the tension leaving his body. I realise then that we have company. Someone else is here and Frederico has no idea.
“Oh, this is so much fucking fun,” Frederico leers.
Xeno flicks his gaze from mine to Frederico’s. “Believe me when I say this, there will be no mercy. You hurt her; you will die a long, painful death. You’ve heard the rumours and now you’ve seen with your eyes what we can do. Your crew is all dead. There’s no one left. Every fucking surface inside of Rocks is covered with their spilt blood. Your friends, the boys you grew up with, they’re all fucking gone because you dared to make a move against us. Dante’s Crew no longer exists. You’re the last man standing.”
“There are plenty of Skins dead too, or have you forgotten that part? I’d say the Skins ain’t looking too good either right about now.”
“Do you really think you’ll survive this, huh?” Xeno asks, ignoring Frederico’s attempt to enrage him further.
Frederico squeezes my breast harder and I grind my teeth together so that I don’t scream and risk my throat being slit. “I’m planning on doing a lot more than surviving,” he retorts, dropping his hand and reaching behind us. He jostles us both a few steps to the side so that he can open the car door behind him. Then pulls us both into the open space.
“If you let Pen go and drive away right the fuck now, we’ll give you a head start,” Xeno promises, his gaze flicking to mine then to York, silently telling me to look at him. I do.
“So, what, now you’re suddenly willing to let me go without repercussions? I ain’t a fool,” Frederico says to Xeno with a sneer. Despite his bravado, I can smell his fear. It’s pungent.
“We’re willing to give you the chance to get away with a head start. If you’re smart, you’ll take it, because maybe we won’t hunt you down, maybe we’ll let you live a life elsewhere, but that’s only if you let Pen go,” York says before glancing at Dax. “Put your gun down,” he urges. A look passes between them and Dax nods. He slowly lowers his gun to the ground, placing it on the floor before rising back up slowly. Beside him York drops his baseball bat, the sounds of it hitting the pavement is loud enough to make me jump. More blood slides down my neck and I bite back the sting of tears.
“It’ll be okay,” he reassures me. “Now close your eyes, Titch.”
I do as he asks, trusting him.
Three things happen at once.
The knife falls away from my throat as Frederico shoves me forward roughly, kicking the back of my knees, unbalancing me further. As I fall the sound of a gun being fired rips through the air, and I swear I can feel the bullet lift the strands of my hair just above my head.
“Kiiiddddd!” Dax roars, and my eyes snap open as I throw my hands out. The pavement comes at me in slow motion, but before I hit the ground there’s a blur of movement and I’m caught in a pair of strong arms, lifted off the ground and carried away from the fighting. Dax pushes me up against the brick wall of the building we’re outside of, pinning me with his body.
“Are you okay?” he asks urgently, lifting my chin gently to inspect the cut on my neck. He must be satisfied it’s a superficial wound because his fingers roam over my face as though he’s checking that I am, in fact, still breathing.
Behind us a blood curdling scream rips through the air. I push his hands away and try to look around his huge frame. “Dax, who was shot?!” I scream. Visions of one of the Breakers bleeding out on the pavement run through my head and I begin to shake violently.
Dax grips my face in his palms. “It’s Frederico. Beast shot Frederico. The boys are okay, but we need to get you out of here.”
“Beast?” I question, my eyes welling with tears. “How can Beast be here?”
“I messaged him. He came.”
“Oh God!”
“Jeb is on the warpath, Kid. Rocks is fucking carnage. I should never have brought you here,” he says, dipping his head low to peer at me. One of his eyes is bloodshot, the capillaries broken and blood seeping into the white making him look like one of those scary fucking zombies from that film 28 Days Later that scared the shit out of me when we watched it as kids. “I don’t want you involved in this. Beast will take you home. But you need to go, right the fuck now.”
I suddenly feel all the air leave my lungs, and a second later I’m gasping for air, like a fish out of water. My chest heaves as I try to draw in precious oxygen.
“Kid, I need you to breathe. Look at me, okay?” he insists.
I nod my head, trying to make sense of everything that’s happening. Behind Dax I can hear Frederico’s screams and the sickening sound of bones breaking, blood spurting, and skin splitting. “They’re going to kill him, aren’t they?” I whisper, my legs feeling like blocks of concrete.
“Not before they find out who sent him. Can you walk?”
I shake my head. Right at that moment I can barely stand. Without a moment’s hesitation, Dax picks me up into his arms, carrying me bridal style. “Don’t look,” he demands, but of course I do. What I see will be forever imprinted on my soul, captured like a batch of grainy polaroid photographs. I blink against the violent snapshots, adding each one to the dusty, mildewed photo book that holds all my worst memories.
Blink. York lifts the baseball bat above his head then smashes it over Frederico’s kneecap, breaking his leg in two from the force.
Blink. Frederico screams in pain, his back arching, blood spurting from his lips.
Blink. Zayn presses a knife against his neck, the serrated edge cutting into Frederico’s skin, blood oozing from the cut.
Blink. Xeno crouches over Frederico, pressing two fingers deep into the gunshot wound in the dying man’s chest.
Blink. Blink. Blink. Blink
Right before my eyes the men I love become the monsters of my nightmares. York’s white-blond hair is splattered with blood, his lips dripping crimson. My vampire comes to life in the starkness of violence and rage. No longer beautiful. Zayn is the shadowy-faced slasher in all those horror movies we loved to watch as kids, the knife his murder weapon of choice.
Xeno is the twisted beast with his claws buried in a man’s chest, ready to pull him to pieces to feed the animal within. And Dax, Dax is my captor. Monstrous in size, covered in blood and ink and gore.
“Talk, prick, or I make your death even more painful!” Xeno snarls, snapping me out of my morbid thoughts and bringing me crashing back to reality.
“Ahhhhhhhhh!” Frederico cries out, blood bubbling up his throat and dripping out of his mouth as he struggles to scream, struggles to breathe.
Xeno leans over Frederico, getting in his face. “Who the fuck sent you?” Every last drop of compassion and empathy I’d begun to witness these past few weeks disappearing as quickly as the blood seeps from Frederico’s body. “I asked you a motherfucking question!”
In response, Frederico just coughs up more blood through a spiteful pain-filled smile. I watch it splatter against Xeno’s face as he struggles to form words. Even though his skin is deathly pale as death waits in the wings, ready to drag him into hell, I realise that he’ll take this secret to his grave just to piss the Breakers off. I have to do something.
“Wait!” I say to Dax, gripping hold of his shirt in my fingers. “Put me down!”
“Kid, this ain’t for you,” he retorts.
“I said, put me down!”
“I need to get you out of here.”
“No. Put me down, right the fuck now!” I shout, shaking and angry, scared and determined.
Willing my body to obey me, I stand on trembling legs. Dax keeps his hand fixed firmly on my elbow to steady me. Despite feeling as though I’m wading through mud, I step towards Frederico as Beast slides out from the Bentley and tucks away his gun into the back of his jeans.
“Hey sweetheart, look who came to save the day,” he says with a wink and a smirk.
“How did you…?”
“Fucker was too preoccupied getting into the car that he didn’t notice me sliding in on the other side. Soon as he let you go, I fired. By the way, he’s got about five minutes until he bleeds out. Whatever the fuck you need to know, you’d better find out now.”
I nod, my whole body shaking as I kneel next to Frederico. Xeno sits back on his haunches, his gaze a mixture of respect and anger. “You need to get out of here,” he says.
“You need to let me do this,” I counter, concentrating on the dying man before me, a mixture of hate, sympathy and horror fucking with my emotions.
“Why?”
“He’s dying, Xeno.”
“He deserves it.”
I press my eyes closed briefly, swallowing hard, then fix my gaze back on Xeno. “He won’t tell you what you want to know. Let me try.”
“He will fucking tell me,” Xeno growls, pressing his fingers deeper into the wound on Frederico’s chest. Frederico mumbles incoherently, his gaze going in and out of focus.
“Xeno, stop,” I whisper, placing my hand over his and feeling the wet warmth, sticky and viscous against my skin.
“He’ll bleed out quicker if I remove my fingers now,” he says. There’s no sympathy in his voice, just cold, hard facts coming from a man whose eyes hold nothing but contempt and hatred for the man painting the concrete scarlet with his blood.
York’s hand rests on my shoulder. “You’ve seen enough,” he says, the baseball bat discarded now as he looks at me with haunted eyes. I glance down from York’s blooded hands to Frederico’s smashed knees and swallow hard. This is the first time since we were kids that I’ve witnessed their violence. I’ve heard about it, sure. They’ve each warned me what they’re capable of, but I haven’t seen it for my own eyes and it’s not a sight I can easily swallow or will ever forget. The four of them are almost unrecognisable and nothing like the men who danced with me at Jewels nightclub a couple of weeks ago.
“You can’t hide who you are from me, not anymore,” I say before leaning over and cupping Frederico’s cheek in my hand. He feels cold. Too cold. “Can you hear me, Frederico?” My voice is soft, cajoling, and I try to keep any signs of hate from it.
Frederico’s eyes focus on my face, a single tear sliding down his cheek. He coughs some more, and I remove my hand from Xeno’s arm and gently wrap my fingers around Zayn’s wrist. “Take the knife off of his throat, Zayn. He can’t talk with it there.”
“Pen…”
“No. This needs to happen.”
He hesitates but when Xeno nods, Zayn releases the pressure, pulling the knife away. Blood, so dark it’s almost black, slides from the slit in Frederico’s throat, joining the growing pool that’s now seeping into my jeans. I try not to look too hard at the parted, jagged cut across his flesh beneath the weeping blood.
“Frederico, I need you to tell me who sent you,” I say, gently stroking his face, like a mother would to comfort her child.
“He doesn’t deserve your kindness,” Beast mutters from behind us. I ignore him.
This man could’ve killed me. He could’ve slit my throat. He didn’t. Right at the last moment, he chose to let me live and in doing so forfeited his own life. I’m choosing to hold onto that split second decision, that precise moment, in order to get me through. I’ve hated Frederico ever since that night when he beat Dax before my eyes in Abney Park Cemetery, then tried to rape me. That hasn’t changed, and there’s a large part of me that’s glad he’s dying, relieved that there’s going to be one less arsehole in this world, but there’s also a part of me that recognises that this could easily be one of my men. The line between good and evil is a thin one. I’ve placed my Breakers on one side of the line because of my love for them, but I know they’ve walked the other side of the line for a long time now. I’ve just witnessed how far over they’ve stepped. There was a time Frederico stood on the other side of the line. Knowing that he wasn’t always an evil bastard helps me to do this, to show a scrap of kindness even if it’s to get what we want.
“Who sent you, Frederico?” I persist, softly, my thumb rubbing over his cheekbone.
“He’s fading fast,” Dax mutters, but I focus only on the dying man before me.
“Mum,” he murmurs, his eyes looking beyond me to someone else. More blood keeps leaking from his lips and I hold in the cry of frustration that I feel rising up my throat. I have to hold it together. I have to.
“I’m here,” I say, hating myself for pretending to be his mother and knowing it’s the only way to get him to speak.
“Mum?”
“Shh. It’s okay.” Leaning closer, I swipe at the tears trickling from his eyes, and stare right into the dying embers of his life. “Who sent you, Frederico? Who was responsible for sending your friends to their deaths tonight?” He mouths the word, his voice struggling to break free from the choking hands of death. “It’s okay, I’m here.” My voice cracks as I twist my head to the side and rest my ear just above his mouth. I feel sick about what I’m doing, but still I continue because now I’m a monster too. I’m the harbinger of death dressed up as an angel. I should be calling an ambulance, instead I’m pretending to be his mother and allowing him to bleed out.
“Jesus fuck,” Beast mutters, and I can hear the discomfort in his voice. I don’t suppose someone he’s killed has ever experienced the same kindness in their final moments, even if it is pretend. It’s easier to disconnect from an act of violence if you feel justified in your actions. Providing sympathy, empathy, makes the victim more human. It shines a light on what you’ve done. I feel the tension from my Breakers, but I persist. It’s the only way.
“Frederico, please,” I whisper. His mouth presses against my ear, and the response that falls from his lips strikes like a poisoned arrow to my heart.
“He saw your dance…” I pull back in shock and watch as blood gurgles up his throat, pouring out of his mouth. He fixes his gaze on me, cruelty flashing in his eyes as a slow smile spreads across his face. “You… provoked… the monster.” More blood pours as his light dims.
“Who? Who saw me?” I insist, my stomach bottoming out because I see the answer in his eyes. I know. I know who’s coming for us.
“David…”
My brother.
This was him. Of course it was.
Black spots blur my vision, but I blink them back, forcing the nausea away. Sitting back on my haunches, I stare at Frederico and the vacant emptiness in his eyes, feeling oddly calm. It’s as though I’m having an out of body experience, and much like when I was a kid, my conscious mind seems to separate from the horror and the fear allowing me to function in the moment. I know the shock will hit me later, but right now all I can think of doing is pressing the pad of my thumb and finger against Frederico’s eyelids, closing them. Not one of my Breakers speak, though I feel their concern for me. It doesn’t make me feel any better, not when the weight of this violent night and all the ones yet to come weigh heavily on my shoulders. It presses down on me and with every passing second, I feel myself sinking into a place I haven’t been in since that night David forced me to choose between the Breakers and my sister. I brought this upon us by facing my biggest fear. This is on me.
“What did he say, sweetheart?” Beast asks, breaking the silence. “Who’s the fucker we gotta kill next?” He cocks his head to the side as I meet his gaze, blinking back the shock.
“My brother.”
