I sit at my desk, watching the clock, unable to move a muscle.
Charlotte has called me several times, and being the dick I am, I let it go to voicemail. I don’t know how to handle what happened last night. This morning was bad enough as I swear I looked guilty of having my finger near someone else’s pussy.
Today, I offered Montana a job at another company I invested in, which she gladly accepted. Her ego is bruised, and thankfully she’s mature enough not to take this further because she holds the cards that can destroy me.
The phone rings again, and I glance at the caller ID. Nikki.
“What do you want?” I answer, defeated.
“Act however you want to act, Edwards, but I’m warning you that you are on the verge of losing your wife.”
Honestly, women and their overly dramatic emotions. Nikki always has to voice her opinion when it comes to Charlotte’s and my relationship.
“Nikki, I’ll be right there, okay? I’m just leaving.”
“So, tell me, Lex, is Montana worth losing your family over?”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about…” I trail off.
“Right, I have no idea what I’m talking about. That’s why today I found divorce papers drawn up by Charlie on our server.”
I freeze, my body stiffening at the use of the word ‘divorce.’ Nikki is causing unnecessary drama. Charlotte will never leave me.
“That’s right. You don’t believe me?” She almost laughs. “Check your email.”
I hear a ping and quickly open the email, the attachment sitting in front of me titled ‘Edwards vs. Edwards.’ My heart sinks to the lowest pit possible. I have royally fucked everything up and have no idea how to fix anything. With a wave of nausea threatening me, my stomach hardens as reality begins to set in.
“I’ll take your silence to mean you had no idea,” she deadpans.
I’m speechless. I don’t want her to leave me. Why would she leave me? Yes, I’d made life impossible for her, but we agreed to this unity until death us to part. Listen to yourself, you’ve fucked her up and trying to place blame on her now. You narcissist piece of shit, Edwards.
“I’m warning you now, Edwards, so listen to me real good. I don’t know what you’re doing or who you’re doing, but you might want to rethink your actions because as you sit there wallowing in self-pity, a certain journalist is here at the gala, and I can tell you now that your wife seems to be enjoying his company.”
The fucking scumbag.
A wave of fury crashes through me at the thought of him trying to win her back. I panic, needing to get out of here.
“Nikki, please promise me you won’t let her do anything,” I plea, desperately.
She remains quiet.
I can hear whispers in the background.
“I’ve got my eye on her. You just better be on your way here because it looks like your competition is this close to winning his girl back.”
I hang up the call quickly and dash out to my car. I speed home, then rush inside and quickly change into my tux. As I race back to the car and drive off, I’m lucky not to get pulled over for what I am clocking. I drive up the long, winding driveway, frustrated that the parking lot is full, but luckily, I find a spot in a dark corner.
I enter through the side entrance, not wanting to be noticed, but Rocky has me on radar. Nikki is across the room, talking with Kate, eyeing me with caution.
“Dude, seriously, what the fuck is going on? Are you banging Montana? You’re a fucking mess. I swear that chick looks nice and tight… but fuck you if you are ‘cause I love Charlie like a sister.”
“Rocky… I’m not, okay? In fact, she is no longer my assistant.”
“All right, what happened? She sucked your dick, is that it?”
“Listen—”
“Dude.” His tone softens. “I know you wouldn’t do that to Charlie. I mean, purposely fuck around, but you gotta fix your marriage. Whatever the hell is bugging you, fix it now because if you look over there…” he points to the dance floor where Charlotte is in Julian’s embrace, her head resting comfortably on his shoulder, “… you are gonna lose your woman forever.” He pats me on the back before walking away.
The temperature in the room is rising, my blood pressure ready to blow as I remain fixated on how she is dancing with him. He whispers words in her ear, my heart beating out of my fucking chest. I’m trapped in my own mistakes, bleeding profusely, yet I’m the one holding the knife, tearing us apart.
She’s parading my weakness in front of me and the world, the one thing I can’t control no matter how hard I try. Julian Baker will forever be the man who proposed marriage first to Charlotte, who offered her a life when I didn’t. He’s touched her in ways only I should have fucking touched her. And despite it all, they will always have that bond, and nothing I do will ever change that.
Charlotte is my fucking wife, yet I stand absolutely paralyzed with anger until her eyes search the room and focus on me.
Don’t leave me, Charlotte.
I love you, baby.
Don’t listen to him, I’m good for you.
I watch her pull away from him. I watch as he grasps onto her for dear life without a doubt making promises to give her everything I haven’t because I’m a fucking selfish dickhead ambushed by my own insecurities.
She walks over, and it’s impossible to be immune to her beauty as she stands before me in a strapless black evening dress that hugs her body in all the right places, the places I want to roll my tongue over.
Hold onto her, Edwards.
Don’t let him steal her from you.
Charlotte says the words that need to be said after I allow my emotions to ravage her with accusations. Knowing I’m completely out of control, I pull her along to the exit, needing to get out of there and get her alone. I need answers. I need her to know she’s mine, I’m finally finding my balls and putting up a fight, hoping it’s not too late, and I haven’t lost her forever.
The desperation has consumed me. I pull her forcefully, pushing her onto the hood of my car taking back what has been mine all along. I need to claim what belongs to me, it conquers all rational thought, and I know I’m hurting her. I know she is crying, yet the minute my cock buries itself within her, I’m falling into a beautiful abyss, one full of light, blinding me, yet calming my senses all at the same time. It’s only a few thrusts, but my body has ignited into a roaring flame, and I can only hold out for so long before it’s all over.
I remind her again who she belongs to, and even in her pleas, I feel her body sink into me. Her walls tighten, and knowing my beautiful wife will explode all over my cock within seconds is enough to slam into her one more time until my walls shatter, and every single nerve is overcome by a pleasurable finish.
In the cool of the night, I gulp in the fresh air, trying to calm my racing heart. I reluctantly pull away, and then she tells me she can no longer do this.
“Please let me go…” she begs.
We planned our future, our lives as one. We brought a child into this world and talked about expanding our family again one day.
With my heart broken and in despair, I beg her to stay with me.
I’m a fucking idiot. I have the best thing in the world and almost lost it, caught up in my old greedy and selfish ways.
And I thought she would forgive me, but instead, she walked away.
She asked for time, but time to me meant more reasoning to leave our marriage. I panicked, saying words, bringing up Julian, until she disappeared back into the ballroom and I’m left to stand on my own.
For once, I allowed my jealousy and controlling nature to take a back seat. Charlotte made herself perfectly clear and in order to gain her trust, I need not to push her.
I kept my distance towards the back of the room, watching her as she spoke so confidently. I was so damn proud of her, amazed by her talent and strength, making the effort to tell her that when we got back home.
I slept in the guest room, despite my body craving her touch. In the morning when I woke, I’m surprised to find her working. I knew her well enough to know her need to bury herself in work is to distract from my presence. So again, I didn’t push just offered to help with numbers. Trying my best not to control the situation as I do every day in the office, I offer some suggestions which she welcomed with gratitude.
As hard it was, I left her to work and spent the day with Amelia. I took her to the park, then a long walk along the beach as she slept in her pram. By the time we got home, it was the usual routine of dinner, bath time then bed.
The same night, I slept in the guestroom not wanting to force myself on Charlotte.
When Monday rolled around, I was knee deep in mundane discussions about budget restraints with shooting locations. No matter what I did, my mind wandered to Charlotte. I needed her to know how much I loved her but every text I wrote, came out wrong. For the last hour, I had written, then deleted multiple texts. And then something pulled me, like a magnetic force so great and with just one tap, I finally hit sent.
The second I laid eyes on her inside my boardroom, I’m riddled with worry until she told me she loved me.
It was exactly what I needed to hear.
I look back now and remember how close I was to losing my family. How easy it was to make promises in front of God, your family, and friends, only to forget them in desperate times. Charlotte and I made a pact that day, we would remain true and honest in good times and bad. For the sake of our daughter, we both owe it to our family.
We also agree we need to be honest about what happened when we were apart. This, I know, will not go down well, and there’s a chance Charlotte will not speak to me ever again, but I rely heavily on our faith and trust that somehow, we can push the darkness behind us.
“We said we’d do this,” she reminds me.
“I know,” I respond.
I don’t know what’s worse, telling her that my finger was on Montana’s pussy for a brief second, or what she is going to tell me about Julian. My insecurity and anger are mixed into a bag of fucked- up emotions, drying my throat as we sit across from each other ready to unleash.
“Are you ready?” she sounds nervous.
“Yes.”
We sit in a hotel room, Charlotte’s idea of not tainting our house with any bad conversations or memories. We left Amelia with my mom because both of us have no idea how this is going to go down. I’m hoping what she is about to tell me isn’t so bad, and we can just be done with it so I can spend the night inside her.
“You first,” she says
“No, you.”
“Rock, paper, scissors.” She holds out her hand, and we shake until we both get scissors. How ironic, I think. Stabbed in the heart, it’s an omen. On our second attempt, she beat me.
Fuck.
Charlotte sits still, crossed-legged at one end of the bed staring at me. I think about complimenting her on her choice of blouse which will look nice on the floor but decide against it.
“You’re doing that lawyer thing you do in court. It’s freaking me out and turning me on.”
“It’s my coping mechanism because somehow, I don’t think I’m going to like what I hear and don’t try turning on the charm.”
I take a deep breath, and with my eyes never leaving hers, I tell her everything that happened the night with Montana. When I finally finish, I wait in silence for her reaction. I expect her fist in my face, not for her to hurt me with words.
“I’ll tell you what happened with Julian. He reminded me of how good we were together. He asked me to leave you, and I thought about it. I remembered how once upon a time my body craved him and gave into him, and there he stood, right next to me, offering to love me the way I deserved to be loved, and I thought about it, Lex. I thought about giving myself to him that night.”
The stabs are sharp, each one of them cutting through the scars that are finally healing, ripping them open. My body tenses, my adrenaline spikes, and my throat goes dry unable to say what I need to say.
How the fuck can she want another man!
I don’t know what’s worse, my physical indiscretion or her emotional one. They are on par. We were both hurting because of what we did to each other. It didn’t make it better that she didn’t touch him, it fucking hurt like motherfucking hell that she had a moment of wanting him for the rest of her life.
“It’s done, Lex. Now, tell me how strong our marriage is?” Her eyes fixate on mine. I can see she is praying we can get through this and restore all faith in humanity. We’ve gotten this far, defeated the odds, and our love should be able to stand any test of time.
“You’re a bitch for wanting him.”
“You’re a cunt for touching her.”
“I hate that word,” I grit.
“Used sparingly, for occasions like this,” she rebuts.
Emotionally exhausted, I want the book closed on this. We’ve lost so much time, torn apart by grief over the last few months, and I want more than anything to forget we were almost over.
“So, what happens now, Charlotte?”
I want her, and I need her at this moment. My eyes penetrate hers, attempting to cast that so-called spell she claims I do every time I look at her. C’mon, eyes, you can do it, make her see the light.
“Now, we fuck harder than we have ever fucked each other in our lives. I need to claim you just as much as you need to claim me. You got me?”
I put on a huge grin. Despite this mess I created, my fucking girl makes me smile. Best yet, I get to fuck her so hard and mark her as mine again.
“I got you… and I’m never letting go of you. Obsessed together forever.”
“Obsessed together forever.”
She winks.
