I’ve had a horrible feeling ever since Adrian disappeared with Sergei and Vladimir.
They wouldn’t hurt him, right?
From what Kolya told me, it was Vladimir who punched Adrian and sent him home looking like that.
Should I go talk to Rai about it since she’s close with Vladimir?
No. Adrian wants me to have faith in him. Besides, they wouldn’t do something to him with all these guests present.
At least, that’s what I tell myself.
I sit down at a table, cradling a glass of champagne that Yan fetched for me. I feel so much better knowing he and Kolya are around.
“My, my, if it isn’t the woman of the hour.”
I stare up to find Kirill looking down at me before he and Damien casually occupy the chairs across from me.
In the past, I would’ve been wary of them—scared, even. They’re both tall and broad men and their reputation is only of violence, torture, and bloodlust. But after living with Adrian for all these years, I realize that they could never be as terrifying as he can get sometimes.
“The woman of the hour?” I ask Kirill.
“The ever-so-reserved Adrian was ready to give up his life for you. What do you call that?”
“What is Adrian doing with Sergei?” Damien takes a sip from a glass of what I’m sure is vodka that he brought with him. “Is there some action I need to know about?”
“I…don’t think so.” I bring the glass of champagne to my mouth.
Kirill adjusts his glasses, staring at me intently. “You’re surprisingly…more.”
“More what?” I ask.
“More everything, though I suspected that Adrian was putting on an act when it came to you.”
“You did?” Damien wipes the droplets of vodka off his upper lip.
“Of course. Not all of us are idiots.”
“Who are you calling a fucking idiot?” Damien clenches his hand in a fist. “Want to go outside and test that?”
“You probably shouldn’t,” I say absentmindedly, watching the stairs, hoping Adrian will appear, already. “Kirill might not resort to violence, but he was some sort of a captain in the Special Forces and I heard that’s a big deal in Russia.”
Silence greets me and I glance back to find both men staring at me with peculiar expressions.
“What? Just because I wasn’t talkative, doesn’t mean I don’t know these things.”
“Add this fact to your list of things to know, Lia.” Damien grins. “I can still kick Kirill’s ass and beat him the fuck up.”
“Or that’s what you wish.” Kirill smirks. “You heard Lia. Just because I don’t use violence, doesn’t mean I can’t. I merely leave brute force to fools like you.”
“Who are you calling a fucking fool?”
Damien and Kirill continue their bickering, but my attention breaks from them when I notice something happening around me.
First, Lazlo left his circle and headed in the direction of the bathroom. His brother, Nicolo, followed soon after, though in a different direction. Then several Italian guards left their positions and scattered. It could be my paranoia, but I’ve learned from Adrian how to recognize a pattern. They might not have gone together or to the same place, but there’s something going on.
He’ll answer to me.
My father’s words from earlier cause me to spring to my feet. Damien calls after me, but I’m not hearing him as I quicken my pace up the stairs, ignoring the pain from the heels.
By the time I reach the top, I see Lazlo, Nicolo, and the others forcing Adrian into one of the rooms.
I break out into a sprint and barge inside before they can close the door.
“Stop it,” I speak to Lazlo with a firm voice. “You promised.”
“Lia, leave,” Adrian tells me with a closed off tone.
“No.”
“We’re only having a chat,” Lazlo says.
“Then you won’t mind if I join you.” I kick the door shut. “After all, I’m the main reason behind this.”
“You’re not.” Lazlo glares at Adrian. “His lies are.”
“He didn’t lie to you.”
“Only hid the truth to serve his agenda,” Nicolo steps in. “And I will see the end to that.”
My father’s second-in-command, Nicolo Luciano, is around my husband’s age but has the stare of a wise man who’s seen the future and didn’t like it. And because of that, he went back in time to slaughter anyone who would contribute to making that future a reality.
In the past, I was always wary of him, even more than I’ve been of Lazlo. Because while my father is the Don, everyone in the criminal circuit knows that his underboss, my uncle, is the true mastermind behind the Lucianos’ bloody savageness.
Rai once told me about his secret torture chambers that cause Nicolo’s enemies to cower in fear. He’s known to be sadistic and downright terrifying to those he deems to be a threat to his family.
And I’ll do everything in my power to make sure my husband isn’t in that category.
Nicolo didn’t seem to dislike me when my father introduced me to him earlier, but that could be only a façade.
“We’ll speak another time, Lazlo.” Adrian comes to my side. “I have to get Lia home.”
“No.” I step forward. “I’m done playing a secondary role in my own life, so if you have something to discuss, do it now.”
Lazlo shakes his head with a smile. “You take your stubbornness after me, it seems.”
“Great, then you know I won’t give up.” I grab Adrian’s hand in mine, squeezing to stop the nerves from emerging. “I don’t care about what you think he did wrong. This man is my husband and the father of my son, your grandchild, and if you hurt him, I will never speak to you again, let alone have any sort of relationship with you.”
“Lia.” Lazlo steps closer. “He lied to me and kept us apart.”
“Because he wanted to protect me from this life. He barely brought me to these gatherings before for the same reason. I’m the one who insisted on being part of his life. If it were up to him, he would’ve kept me in a gilded cage where no one would reach me, let alone hurt me.”
The Don stares at Adrian with what seems like newfound respect, and I smile internally. I knew that no matter how mad he is at Adrian, he would relate to that protective side of him. I guessed it to be a trait they had in common and I guessed correctly.
“That still doesn’t give him the right to take you from me.”
“I understand, but give it time and you’ll get over it.”
“No.”
“Please, for me?”
He grunts.
I can tell his resolve is faltering, so I resort to one last attempt. My hold tightens on Adrian’s hand, and then I whisper, “Please…Papa.”
My father’s eyes widen and he remains silent for a second before he speaks, “What…did you just call me?”
“If you want me to say it again, give me your word that you will let Adrian go.”
“You’re surprisingly manipulative, Carina.”
I learned from the best. I stare up at Adrian with a smile and he’s watching me with a blank expression. What does that mean? Is he mad at me?
“Fine.” Lazlo steps even closer.
My gaze slides back to him, my hopes soaring. “Give me your word.”
“I give you my word that I won’t harm Adrian.”
“Thank you.”
“Now, repeat what you said earlier, Carina.”
I release Adrian’s hand and hug Lazlo for a brief second, then pull back. “Thank you, Papa.”
He studies me again, seeming taken aback before he clears his throat. “We’ll meet again, Volkov.”
And with that, he exits the room, followed by my uncle, who cuts a sharp glare at Adrian, and the rest of their guards.
As soon as the door closes behind them, I sag against the wall, catching my breath. “God. That was close. I should’ve figured out that Nicolo knew everything.”
My heart beats so loud, it’s as if I’ve just finished a workout. While I knew these types of ordeals were scary, I didn’t think it’d be downright terrifying.
“Why did you do that?”
I raise my head at Adrian’s quiet question. He’s staring down at me with a hand in his pocket and the same expression from earlier.
Straightening, I frown. “What do you mean, why? For you.”
“Who told you to call him Papa for me? Now, he won’t let you out of his sight.”
“What makes you think I want to be out of his sight? I happen to like him and want a relationship with him. What’s wrong with that?”
“I don’t know. Let’s see. The fact that he’s the fucking Don and his life is constantly threatened by the Rozettis, and fuck knows who he makes enemies with?”
“You’re being a hypocrite right now, because we both know your life is threatened all the time, too, and yet, I’m still with you, aren’t I?”
“I don’t put you in harm’s way.”
“Oh, then how about the attack after I barely gave birth to Jeremy or the other time at Rai’s gathering?”
“I protected you.”
“After you forced me into this life.”
“So that’s your problem? The fact that I forced you?”
“No. Well, yes. But it’s the fact that you’re still doing it now. You don’t respect me enough or trust me enough to let me make my own decisions.”
“It’s not about respect or trust. It’s about your fucking safety, Lia. I can debate on anything but that.”
“But you don’t! You just map the road out and expect me to follow it.”
“You didn’t have a problem with that before.”
“Of course I did. Why the hell do you think I jumped off that fucking cliff?” I breathe deeply so I don’t have a meltdown. “Just because I didn’t speak up, didn’t mean I was fine. I was hurt countless times and deeply so. I won’t continue to bottle everything inside and let it fester, then eat me alive. I’m not that Lia anymore, Adrian.”
He’s quiet for a second before his calm voice fills the air. “I can see that.”
“Give me something then.”
“I won’t let you put yourself in harm’s way and remain quiet about it, Lia.”
“That’s not what I meant.” I push off the wall and place a hand on his chest. “I’m done settling for scraps. I need more of you.”
“You have me, Lenochka. All of me.”
“Not where it matters.”
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“I might have your care and your protection, but I don’t have your heart.”
“You do.”
“If I did, you would’ve given me more liberties. But you still have these walls where I don’t have the keys to its doors. I know it’s because of your childhood, I know you don’t trust that I won’t leave if you open those doors, but you need to give me those keys. I already opened myself up to you fully, so it’s time you do the same. It’s time you…let go.”
Adrian’s chest tightens against my palm, and I can feel his heartbeat skyrocketing even as he tries to hold on to his eternal calm. “You can ask for anything and I’ll slaughter everything in my path so it’s yours, but I can’t give you what I’m incapable of.”
Tears barge to my eyes. “Is that really what you think?”
“It’s not what I think. It’s the truth.”
My heart breaks, its pieces splintering into the cavity of my chest and prickling the skin. It doesn’t matter if I don’t believe what he’s saying to be true, that I’m certain he can let go if he tried. If he doesn’t believe it himself and keeps his emotions under lock and key, there’s no way I’ll be able to get inside.
And that hurts more than I ever imagined.
“Lia…” He wipes beneath my eyes, taking away the rolling tears. “Don’t cry.”
I push his hand away. “Don’t touch me.”
His jaw clenches. “I know you’re upset, but I told you, not touching you is out of the fucking question.”
“Even if you repulse me?” I’m trying to be hurtful at this point, but I don’t care. He’s the one who hurt me first.
I ripped my heart out and placed it on a platter in front of him and he just ignored it.
He grabs me by the chin, tilting my head back so he can peer down at me with his punishing eyes. “Even if I repulse you.”
“I hate you.”
“Lia,” he warns.
“What, Adrian?”
“Take that back.”
“No.”
“If you don’t, I’ll fuck it right out of you.”
“I’ll still hate you.”
He backs me against the wall, using his hold on my jaw and I gasp as my behind hits the solid surface.
The sound is swallowed by his lips on mine. His kiss is imploring, dominating, and harsh, meant to punish me and make me fall to my knees in front of him.
I don’t, though.
Instead of submitting to him as usual, I bite down hard on his lower lip until a metallic taste explodes on my tongue.
If I thought that would stop him, I’m far from right. He grabs both of my wrists and slams them above my head on the wall, but he doesn’t release my mouth.
His tongue darts out, licking the blood before he bites my lip. He doesn’t break the skin, but I whimper at the savage force of it.
As if that isn’t enough, he slips his other hand between my legs. I shiver at his wild touch, at how his palm forces its way against the sensitive flesh of my inner thigh.
He bunches my panties, then rips them off. The motion always, without a doubt, gets my pussy wet and aching.
Adrian thrusts two ruthless fingers inside me, ripping a moan from my throat.
Holy shit.
It doesn’t matter how many times he touches me, every time he does, my body craves his roughness and mercilessness, his punishments and his sadism.
Maybe I have no hope after all, because the moment he starts pounding inside me, I can’t resist the clenching at the base of my stomach or the throbbing of my nipples.
My body readies for the impact and my limbs shake uncontrollably as erotic sounds leave my lips.
Just when the orgasm is about to hit me, Adrian removes his fingers and his mouth, leaving me panting.
My lips tingle, feeling bruised, and my chest rises and falls hard as I stare at him.
He quickly unbuckles his pants and frees his rock-hard cock. I release a needy moan when he effortlessly lifts me up with one hand, urging me to wrap my legs around him.
I do, because I need the orgasm he didn’t give me just now. Adrian is usually about giving before he takes, but this is supposed to be a punishment, so he won’t give me that pleasure easily.
He thrusts inside me, reawakening the buildup from earlier. His pace is harsh and long, meant to hit as deep as he can go.
With my wrists above my head, I’m completely at his mercy, and right now, he doesn’t seem like he has any to spare.
Tingles still erupt at my walls with each delicious plunge, his groin hitting my swollen clit.
Pleasure deepens and mounts until all I can hear is the sound of the slaps of flesh against flesh and my desperate sobs for more.
I’m close, so…close.
“Tell me you love me,” he rasps.
“No…” My voice trembles.
“Say it, Lia.”
“N-no.”
His pace slows down and I nearly cry from frustration. He can’t possibly do this to me now.
“Adrian…don’t…”
His gray eyes are the harshest I’ve seen in a while, like a storm at the point of erupting. “Say the fucking words, Lia.”
“I hate you,” I sob, moving my hips to keep the friction.
“If you don’t say them, I will leave you hot and bothered right here and now.”
His pace slows further until he’s barely moving inside me.
“Adrian…”
“Say. It.”
My walls crumble and I hate myself at this moment and I hate him. Because he made me feel this way and he’s using it against me.
But most of all, I hate that I fell so deep that I couldn’t find a way out even if I wanted to, even if having these feelings hurt.
“I love you,” I whisper between sniffles.
Adrian’s pace picks up almost instantly, driving into me with a deeper rhythm that steals my breath. He pulls all the way out, then thrusts back in as he teases my clit. “Again.”
“I love you…” Stars form behind my lids as violent as the words out of my mouth. “I love you, Adrian…”
The orgasm isn’t only strong, it’s unending, going on for so long that I’m crying, tears rolling down my cheeks and chin.
Adrian slams his lips to mine while he powers harder and faster until he finds his own release. My eyelids droop as his hot cum soaks my inner walls.
He doesn’t stop devouring my mouth and mixing his blood with my tears and our saliva. His tongue implores mine, his fingers digging harder into the soft flesh of my wrists as he consumes me, kissing me as hard as he fucks me.
By the time he wrenches his mouth from mine, releasing my wrists and pulling out of me, I’m so dazed that I momentarily forget where the hell I am or what just happened.
It isn’t until my quivering legs touch the ground that everything comes back to me.
I asked him to open up and he didn’t only refuse, but he brutally showed me that he never will.
Adrian grabs some tissues and starts to wipe my thighs. I slap his hand away, fresh tears springing to my eyes.
“Lia…”
“You’re so cruel, Adrian.”
“I’m cruel for making you admit what you feel?”
“No, you’re cruel for using it against me.” I lift my chin. “You’re not allowed to touch me unless you’re ready to let go.”
His jaw clenches. “You’re my wife and I will touch you whenever I fucking please.”
“Not unless you’re ready to force me.”
And with that, I turn around and head to the door, thankful that my legs don’t give out on me.
I head straight outside, wanting to go home. A few guards are scattered around the property and I do my best to avoid them so they don’t see my tears. Once I’m in the parking lot, I pull out my phone to call Yan.
As I do, I wipe my tears with the back of my hand, but they keep multiplying.
“Come on, Yan. Pick up.” I really don’t want to go home with Adrian right now.
I’m heading in the direction of our car when something cold presses to my side.
“Long time no see, Duchess.”
