I brought both those girls home that night.
Don’t remember much about it.
When I wake up this morning both girls are still asleep either side of me and I survey my room.
Bottles everywhere, clothes thrown about, a torn curtain, actually — that’s weird.
Rub my eyes. See Magnolia’s little devastated face from last night.
Had Decks follow her home to make sure she was okay. She was. Ballentine turned up pretty soon after.
Hard not letting it show on my face how much that stung. But my plan worked — of course it did — that’s all the matters.
I stare up at the ceiling, convince myself that that’s true. It’s all that matters.
It’s not magical or grand, love is fucked.
There’s a knock on my door.
“What?” I call.
Magnolia pokes her head in and I sit up straighter. Don’t mean to. Just old habits and shit, yeah?
Her eyes fall to the girls beside me — Cleo and Alexis — both of whom are now just stirring awake.
“Leave,” I tell them as I crack my back.
Both girls roll out of my bed, grab their things and scatter.
I climb out of bed — fully naked. Like I care, like she hasn’t seen me naked 12,000 times before. I want her to miss me too — I pull on some sweatpants and she stands there, arms crossed over her chest, nose a bit in the air. Solid glare.
“Nice.” She spits.
“You were fucking a gang lord—” I roll my eyes. “What’d you expect?”
“More from you.” She gives me a disappointed shrug and I sniff, annoyed.
“Yeah but you got what you wanted, Parks.”
She pulls back. “What did I get that I wanted?”
I squint over at her. “You think I don’t know Ballentine went to your house last night?”
She blinks over at me, surprised.
“I see everything,” I tell her as I shake my head.
She walks towards me, arms still folded, still glaring.
And I roll my eyes again, give her a dismissive wave of the hand.
“You got him back. You’re welcome.”
Her eyes pinch. “What?”
“What?” I scoff. “You think I didn’t know he’d defend your honour if he saw me fucking another girl in a club?” I scoff as I shake my head like I’m not sick over it. “It’s sweet— How much he loves you—”
Magnolia’s blinking a lot, processing.
She squints over at me. “Did you really do that for me or is this just a merry coincidence?”
“You know what, Tiges, I’m embarrassed to say that I’ve fallen into the ranks of men who find that there’s very little that they wouldn’t do for you.”
Her face softens how I wish it wouldn’t. “Are you telling the truth?”
“Why would I lie?”
“I don’t know?” She shakes her head. “Why would you do what you did?”
And I shrug, uncomfortable with how wide-eyed she’s getting. I’ve only got so much willpower. “Ballentine needed to feel good enough for you. Nothing ups a lad’s confidence like fighting for the girl he loves—”
“Oh.” She says. Takes a breath as she takes my hand and maybe her eyes go teary — I don’t know. I’m trying not to look. “Thank you.”
I lift her hand to my mouth and kiss it. Weak of me, but fuck it. I’m only human.
“You’re welcome—” I tell her and then I drop her hand, ready to lie through my fucking teeth. “And I’m relieved.”
She frowns at me but I shake my head at her.
“I thought Daisy was a handful, but fuck me, you’re an absolute headache.”
She frowns more and I laugh because I love her and I’m going to miss offending her.
“But worth it though,” I tell her just to keep her a bit sweet.
“So this is it?” she asks, straightening up. “We’re done now?”
“Yep.” I nod. “We’re done.”
“I’ll miss you,” she tells me.
“I’m sure you will—” I nod. “No way is Ballentine as good in bed as I am.”
She rolls her eyes and I toss her a smile. Try not to cry as I say it. “I’m happy for you—”
“Yeah?” She smiles up at me, hopeful for my approval.
I can’t really give it out loud at the second because I’m on edge so I just nod.
“Hey.” She pokes me, catching my eye. “Would you do me a grand favour and not put out a hit on the man I love?”
I purse my lips, pretending to think about it for a second before I roll my eyes.
“He’s a Hemmes for all intents and purposes. Under their protection. So are you, so you don’t need mine.” I take her chin between my finger and thumb. “But you have it. You need anything ever, I’m your man.”
She leans in towards me, presses her mouth against mine, light and gentle, wind-in-a-field, sun-on-your-cheek kind of kiss.
“Yes, you are.”
She turns and walks away, pausing at my door to turn back at stare at me.
“You are a very dangerous man, Julian. I know that. But I do hope that you know that above that and before that, you really are actually quite a good man.”
Fuck me dead and write that on my tombstone, then.
I flick her an edge of a smile. “See ya, Tiges.”
A few hours later there’s a knock on my door again. I’m face-down in my bed, drinking and drunk all at once.
“No,” I call to the door.
“COMING IN,” my sister yells and I groan.
“Hi.” she says from the other side of the room.
I say nothing, so she walks over towards me gingerly and kneels down beside my bed.
“Hey,” she says gently, running her hand over my hair and I smack her away.
“Don’t.” I roll over, glaring at her. “I’m fine.”
She watches me closely. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” I tell her.
She glances around my room. “Well, it smells fine in here—”
“Fuck off, Dais!” I snap. “I said I’m fine.”
“You’re clearly not.” She shakes her head, watching me sadly.
“I said fuck off!” I yell at her like I never would otherwise.
She nods once. “I’m here if you need me.”
Jack
7:21pm
7:21pm
Out. Just saw Magnolia and BJ holding hands.
Seemed romantic.
What did I miss?
Jules and her are done
What!
No?
Why??
Just time.
Do we hate her now?
No more than usual.
Is he okay?
I don’t think so.
