After this morning’s inquiry of why my father hadn’t received any pictures in several days, I sent three photos of Aislinn and Finn that I’d taken yesterday. In reality, several days only meant one or two days of no new photos, but obviously that was way too long in my old man’s mind. I had to admit I was surprised but also very pleased about how much my father had taken to Finn. They’d really hit it off during our visit five months ago,.
I parked the car in front of the daycare where Finn had spent the morning, nodding a greeting at the women I recognized as wives of my men. A couple of my soldiers picked up their sons too since I’d made it a habit. Finn was chatting with a few boys his age when I arrived. He waved at me, beaming. He loved going to daycare and he’d made two close friends. The others were at least respectful, as far as his stories went. His last name carried weight in this area and would protect him for now, but I knew he’d still have to fight many battles alone. Finn Devaney. We finalized the adoption a month ago. Balor and I had managed to handle things quickly.
Waving goodbye at his friends, Finn came over to me. He took my hand. “How was your day, buddy?”
He grinned. “We visited a dog shelter today.”
“And now you want a dog.”
He nodded enthusiastically. “But they didn’t have wolfhounds.”
“They rarely do. You don’t see them around here. They need the countryside so they can run as fast as their long legs carry them.”
Finn nodded, looking a tad deflated.
“We’ll be back in Ireland in six weeks for the wedding. Then you can play with the hounds all you want.”
Finn beamed up at me. “I’ll carry the rings!”
“Yes, that’s right.”
I stifled a grin at how excited he was for Aislinn and me to get married in Ireland with the family. A while back, he’d admitted that he was sad he hadn’t been invited the first time. This time pretty much everyone was invited. Father had made sure of it. Half of Kenmare and every Devaney from around the world too. The manor would be bursting at the seams, but I hadn’t argued. Father and my aunt Siobhan had taken care of the planning.
“Are you hungry?” I asked, steering the car toward ‘The Sassy Maiden’. I always got a big grin on my face when I saw the sign above the pub. It was a wooden sign with golden cursive lettering stenciled over red hair blowing in the wind.
I parked right in front and helped Finn out of the car before we made our way into the inside of the pub. It used to stink of old smoke and rancid fat, but was now filled with mouthwatering scent of buttery potatoes, sweet pie crust and slow-cooked meat filled the air. Aislinn, a few of my men and I had renovated the inside with a new lighter color for the walls, floors and furniture. Aislinn had picked white oak for the flooring because it reminded her of driftwood and the tables and chairs were rustic white. It reminded me of a small fish and chips shop near Kenmare I’d often visited as a child and teen. A new waitress waved at me from behind the bar then disappeared in the kitchen, probably to tell Aislinn we were here. Soon after, Aislinn emerged with her hair up in a bun, face shiny from the heat in the kitchen and her workload but happy, and as usual in a red apron. The napkins and tablecloths were red too. She beamed as she made her way over to our table. We always picked the same table every lunch. It was the only vacant table in the restaurant. In the two months of its existence, The Sassy Maiden had already become popular in our Irish community and beyond. Aislinn bent down and kissed Finn’s cheek before she kissed my lips.
“What’s the special today?” I asked like I did every day.
“A black pudding wrapped in a puff pastry with rhubarb chutney and a watercress salad. I recommend the hand-cut twice-cooked chips and the delicious beer-battered hake as well,” Aislinn said with a wink.
Finn almost always ordered the fish and chips so the latter was a must.
“Then I’ll have the special and a Scotch egg with extra pickled onions.”
Aislinn bit her lip with a happy nod then turned around and disappeared in the kitchen. Soon after, thanks to the new waitress, a cider appeared in front of me and a homemade rhubarb iced tea in front of Finn.
Aislinn joined us for lunch twenty minutes later. She only had the root vegetable soup.
“Stuffed?” I asked. Aislinn always tasted everything she cooked. That meant she was rarely hungry during lunchtime, but she wanted to join us with a full plate anyway.
“And shattered,” she said with a tired smile. “But the new cook is good and eager to learn. She’ll be a great help and will be ready to take over the cooking for a week or two.”
So far Aislinn had handled the cooking alone. After she dropped off Finn at daycare she headed for the restaurant and cooked like a madwoman for hours until Finn and I came for lunch. Then she usually worked a few more hours while Finn watched her or his favorite shows, and she closed the restaurant around 3:30, missing the evening business. Not that we needed the money but having evening service would have been of advantage for Aislinn’s dream of establishing a renowned Irish gastropub in the area. Once she handed over more responsibilities to other people, things would become easier.
As soon as I was done with my food, I glanced at my watch. Everyone knew I took two hours off during lunchtime but I couldn’t afford more than that. Our gun business with the Russians was still taking off. Sergej insisted he didn’t know what had happened to Imogen and my own investigations hadn’t resulted in any more information about Imogen’s whereabouts in the five weeks between the moment she left Maksim and when she washed ashore.
I got up and cupped Aislinn’s head for a goodbye kiss before I ruffled Finn’s hair. Then I left. Lunch with Aislinn and Finn always left me feeling refreshed. It was a routine that allowed us time together, apart from a brief dinner before Finn went to bed. Father, too, had often made time for a lunch break when we were younger and then later when we’d been at school, he made sure to be back for dinner. Despite his business, Mum had insisted on our family time. Some people believed you couldn’t be both, a loving family man and brutal leader, but they just didn’t have the right incentive. I knew things would be harder once Aislinn and I had a baby. Seamus was shattered all the time because of their little son. At the moment, his sleep-deprived state made him unavailable for the difficult contract murders.
When I returned to the docks, I found Seamus in my chair, his arms on the desk with his head resting atop, snoring loudly. I grabbed my laptop from the desk and headed back out. Another gun delivery was arriving tomorrow, and our clan and the Russians needed to make sure it was distributed widely.
I’d just ended a call with Sergej when Aislinn called. The moment I heard the first word out of her mouth, I knew something had happened.
“Lorcan,” she said, her voice shaky. Judging by the background noise, she was in the car. “Can I drop off Finn?”
“Sure. What’s wrong?”
“I’ll tell you later.” She hung up, and I tried not to turn into a worried madman. If she’d been in danger, she would have said it.
She pulled up in front of the warehouse ten minutes later, her cheeks flushed. She rushed toward me and left Finn in the car. “What’s wrong?” I asked when she collided with me.
“Imogen woke up. I got the call twenty minutes ago. I need to see her, and I don’t want Finn to know before I know details about her state.”
I glanced at Finn. His head was lowered in concentration. He was probably playing one of his games on her phone. We had told him about Imogen about a month ago, when he’d asked about her again. He’d taken the news considerably well, maybe because her current state didn’t change things for him. She still wasn’t a caring mother, just like she’d never been, and he had us. We were his family. Nothing would change that, not even Imogen waking up.
“I’ll take him to the park. I’ll take the rest of the day off, but the rest of the week is busy. We’ll have to ask Maeve if all fails.”
“She has a fussy newborn. Finn loves Mrs. Byrne. She’ll gladly watch him.” I picked Finn up and Aislinn rushed off after a brief kiss.
Finn peered up at me. “Is she okay?”
“Yeah. Maeve needs her help with the baby, that’s all. We’ll have fun at the park. How about we take a boat ride?”
“Yes!”
“Let’s just quickly wake good old Seamus so he can handle business while we’re gone.”
Finn nodded enthusiastically and grinned. He and I were a good team.
Aislinn came home late, long after dinner, so Finn and I had enjoyed a Reuben sandwich at the best foodtruck in the city. When she came into the apartment, Finn was already asleep. I was sitting on the sofa, reading over the inventory of the shipment that we intervened when Aislinn plopped down on the sofa beside me and put her head on my shoulder without a word. She let out shuddery breath. I touched her head and allowed her to cry, waiting for her to be ready to talk to me.
“She woke up. They took out the breathing tube but she can’t speak. The doctors say she’s doing surprisingly well. But I can tell that she doesn’t remember me. I sat by her bed and she looked at me but I could tell she didn’t know why I was there. I was a stranger to her. The doctors said I shouldn’t overstrain her with information. Many people with brain injuries and amnesia get upset if relatives try to make them remember, so I’m supposed to take it slow. She was asleep most of the time after she initially opened her eyes.” She peered into my eyes. “I can’t imagine forgetting you or Finn or Mum. It seems absolutely horrible. I hope she remembers soon.”
“I can’t imagine forgetting you or Finn either. You’re such an integral part of my life now.”
Aislinn squeezed my thigh. “I hope Imogen’s connection to me is strong enough to pull her back, to remind her of who she is and who her family is.”
I stroked her arm. “Don’t think that all the responsibility rests on your shoulders. I’m sure there are many more factors playing into Imogen’s amnesia. And maybe her brain is using amnesia to protect her from the past. I’ll help you however I can, but I think you’ll have to take into consideration that Imogen won’t ever be the sister you knew.”
“I know. The doctors say her brain injury contributes to the amnesia, but sometimes other parts of the brain take over the tasks from injured parts.”
“What about Finn? Will you tell him?” I had my own thoughts about the matter, but even if Aislinn and I cared for Finn together now, I still always let her have the final say. It was strange for me to let others decide, but in this case it felt like the right thing to do.
Aislinn sighed. “I’ve been thinking about it since I got the call today, but I’m torn. It’s his mother, but he’s too young to understand what’s going on. If he finds out she’s awake, he’ll want to see her, and if she doesn’t remember him …”
“He’ll be heartbroken,” I said. “Do you want my take?”
“Of course. You and I are both taking care of Finn, so I think we should decide together.”
Fuck, I tried to hide how much this meant to me. I was turning into a sap. “I wouldn’t tell him yet. Let’s wait a bit. Not just because it would hurt Finn but also because the knowledge that she doesn’t remember her own son might unsettle Imogen too.”
“You’re right. Things are good as they are in Finn’s life. We’ll tell him once Imogen is more stable.”
Aoife came to New York a week later. This time she accepted the flight as a gift, even if she still insisted on paying back the rest of the money that she owed Five-Leaf Clover.
Finn thought she was here to see him and to help Aislinn with last-minute wedding shopping, which was both true, but mainly she spent time at the hospital when Finn was in daycare so Aislinn could keep working in her restaurant. We were civil to each other, and I got the feeling that she was slowly coming around.
One evening, about ten days after Imogen woke from the coma, Aislinn and I sat on the couch. Her days were even longer now as she spent even more time at the hospital. She was exhausted.
“Should we cancel the wedding? We can have it next year when things have calmed down,” I said.
My father would be furious and would definitely chew my ear off. His guilt trip would be out of this world. Everything was already set up. Imogen’s state had improved very slightly; she stayed awake for longer periods of time, reacted with facial expressions and her eyes when she was spoken to, and made base sounds, but she couldn’t speak yet and didn’t recognize Aoife or Aislinn.
Aislinn raised her eyes and shook her head. “No. I know you’ve been looking forward to renewing our bond in Ireland. And I don’t want to offend your father.”
I nodded. It wasn’t the reply I’d hoped for. “What about you? I want you to enjoy the day. You probably didn’t enjoy the first time, and I don’t want this time to be clouded by worry too.”
She smiled slightly. “I didn’t enjoy our last wedding, though the dancing was nice.” She touched my cheek. “I want this wedding. I don’t want to postpone it. There’s no guarantee that Imogen is going to be better next year. Life needs to go on, for us and for Finn. And I won’t let anything ruin our special day.”
I kissed her. Life kept putting hurdles up for us, but so far we’d jumped them together.
Aislinn
Irish weather gifted us with sunshine, warmth, and a light breeze on our wedding day in late August. We’d decided on an outdoor wedding, though the staff had been prepared to move everything inside if rainfall erupted. A dozen huge marquees had been set up on the lush lawn overlooking the ocean right in front of Devaney Manor for the dinner and dancing.
Everyone was dressed festively, as if they were about to attend a horse race; the women wore cocktail dresses, flamboyant hats, and other headdresses while the men were dressed in tuxedos or kilts.
The pastor who’d married off most Devaneys in the last forty years took our vows right at the cliffs with all of our guests surrounding us. I knew less than ten percent of them, but it didn’t matter. I was happy that Finn, Mum, Maeve and her family, Mrs. Byrne, Gulliver, and my estranged family from Kenmare were present.
I didn’t allow myself to feel sad about Imogen’s absence. I’d told her about the wedding during one of my last visits. She still wasn’t fit enough to travel such a long way. and I doubted she would have felt comfortable being surrounded by so many people she didn’t know, myself included. She still didn’t remember anything, but she was dealing surprisingly well with it. Lorcan had assigned her a constant bodyguard so she didn’t have to see too many new faces that confused her further.
Lorcan’s face lit up when he saw me in my wedding dress as I walked down the aisle toward him with Finn at my side. Finn’s hand in mine was sweaty, or maybe it was my hand. We both were nervous with so many eyes on us. “Focus on Lorcan and the ocean,” I murmured under my breath to take away some of his—and my—nervousness.
I’d picked a similar wedding dress like last time, only with a bigger underskirt and more embroidery, and this time I wore a veil as was tradition in the Devaney family.
When I reached Lorcan, he took my hand from Finn who was beaming. Lorcan patted his shoulder and Finn’s pride made him look about ten inches taller. Later he handed us our rings as we exchanged our vows. This time, I felt them deep inside my heart and I meant every word.
Lorcan had proven his loyalty and love in the last few months. He was by my side and had become a partner at my side that I’d never dared to hope for. When we kissed, a swarm of seagulls flew over our heads with excited screeching. One of them dove down toward one of the guests and ripped the particularly shiny and flamboyant hat from her hair. The woman screamed bloody murder and tried to grab the hat, but the bird was quicker and flew into the sky.
I giggled, unable to hold back the sound at the ridiculous scene. Callahan and Caden pulled guns and aimed at the seagull but missed the screeching bird.
My eyes widened, and Lorcan shrugged. “They’re already too drunk to hit their target.” I wasn’t sure if I wanted to see a bird being shot from the sky on my wedding day, though the scene was really too good to miss.
After another round of shots, the bird dropped the hat and flew away. Unfortunately, the bird’s screeching and the overall excitement had triggered the wolfhounds, and they dashed toward the falling hat, thinking it was prey. Once they reached it, they ripped it apart within seconds.
The woman clutched her heart in utter shock, but Thomas quickly moved to her side and began talking to her. Soon, she was cackling. He sent me and Lorcan a quick wink before his face became his usual controlled mask again.
“I’d call that a good start to our wedding celebrations. It’ll only get more chaotic after this. That’s a Devaney family tradition.”
I bit my lip with a happy smile and leaned against Lorcan as I watched Finn grin as he chased Mum toward the dogs. People began to congratulate and hug us as we made our way down to the marquee where the reception with sparkling cider was taking place. My small white purse with embroidery that matched my dress held my phone, which had started vibrating. I glanced inside and saw it was a message from Imogen, congratulating us. I knew she must have asked her bodyguard or a nurse to write it, and I was incredibly touched. Lorcan squeezed my hand and kissed my temple.
Lorcan and I accepted glasses with the sparkling cider from the waitstaff. For the first time in a long time, I felt completely at ease. I beamed up at Lorcan as we both raised our glasses. Lorcan’s eyes reflected the same contentment that I felt. Finn appeared at the front of the guests with a glass of apple juice, and Lorcan motioned him forward. He rushed over and settled between us as we finally took our first drink as a married couple.
Most of the guests downed their cider in one deep gulp. Then, applause and whistles washed over us. Finn jumped up and down excitedly. I couldn’t stop smiling.
I knew life would keep throwing challenges at us, but Lorcan, Finn and I would handle them together.
