I could barely sit still on our one-hour drive from Cork Airport to the Devaney manor near Kenmare. Finn was asleep in the child seat, his mouth wide open in utmost exhaustion. My heart felt full as I watched the countryside rush by, but my nervousness about meeting Lorcan’s father was almost crushing.
Lorcan sat in the front beside his brother Aran, who had picked us up in his Land Rover, which was covered in dirt. Aran had offered me a friendly greeting, no sign that he knew anything about the unfortunate events of the past. Maybe he was willing to give me a chance if Lorcan did.
It made me feel better.
“There it is,” Lorcan said, his voice full of pride.
I looked to the front where an ivy-covered mansion with countless chimneys and several towers rose up among the lush greenery. It had a slate roof and a row of windows reflected the few rays of sun that broke through the clouds. Finn sat up in his seat and stared out as well.
His mouth fell open when he saw the manor. I’d never seen such a sprawling estate that wasn’t a historic sight, but tourists definitely never set foot in Devaney manor.
Aran pulled along the cobblestone driveway. He and Lorcan got out of the vehicle, but Finn and I remained in a sort of stunned stupor. Lorcan opened my door and held out his hand. I took it and allowed him to pull me out.
I craned my neck to get a good view of the mansion. Why would anyone need so many chimneys? I tried to count them but lost track eventually.
“Fifty-two ornate chimneys and 365 leaded windows,” Lorcan said as he lifted Finn out of his child seat and put him down on the pathway.
I shook my head. “It’s a castle.”
“My father can tell you every little detail about it. If you want to impress him, ask him if it’s gothic revival.”
I stared blankly at him.
“Many think it’s gothic but it was built later.”
I nodded then laughed. I’d definitely forget all about it by the time I met Devaney senior. I was nervous anyway. “This is a place where you expect royalty to live. A lordship or something of the sort, not a mob family.”
“No royal blood whatsoever. Our family used to be farmers, and this area was part of their plot, which they leased from a big landowner. It was a small plot, barely producing enough potatoes to feed my ancestor’s, and then the Great Famine hit the country, and people started dying left and right. Our family split back then. They were two brothers who tried to save their families. One brother risked passage to New York in the hopes of a better future for him and his family, but three of his six children didn’t survive the journey. Two had died in the famine before that. Once in New York, they were treated like scum, and he became a railroad worker and his wife a washerwoman, but they still barely got by … until he and a few fellow Irish men came together as a gang. The other brother went to Dublin, and after trying to feed his family with honest work, he too eventually became part of a gang that he soon led. So two brothers, unbeknownst to each other, were forced to take the same direction to survive.”
“Is this true?” I asked. It sounded too good to be true, almost as if they were modern-day Robin Hoods.
“It is. Ask my father or read our family history. There’s a fat tome in the library.”
The salty scent of the ocean hung in the air. In the distance, I could make out the boisterous sea. Devaney Manor sat on the shores of Kenmare Bay. The coastline wasn’t as rough here as it was at the Cliffs of Moher.
“Does the property reach the ocean?”
“Yes, there’s pathway from the conservatory straight down to the cliffs.”
I shook my head, grinning. I’d missed Ireland beyond words, especially Dublin. But even the lush green countryside, with its dots of white sheep and the salty spray of the ocean warmed my heart.
The front door opened and a tall, broad-shouldered older man with gray hair and a beard appeared in the doorway. Then three huge dogs, Irish Wolfhounds, trotted out and down the stairs. Finn took a step closer to Lorcan and me and gripped our hands.
“They look like wolves but act like sheep, don’t worry,” Lorcan said, but even I tensed as the huge dogs rushed toward us. They greeted Lorcan then sniffed at us with wagging tales but stilled showed restraint.
“William, Butler, and Yeats,” Lorcan introduced the three giants. Their heads almost reached my chest. I grinned wryly because of their name.
“My father loves his poems,” Lorcan said then nudged me and Finn in the direction of the front door. I’d worn a beautiful new wool dress and elegant leather boots to make a good impression. I hadn’t wanted to be part of the Devaney family, but now that I was, I wanted them to like me. I’d never had a big family and always longed for it. Even if this wasn’t my ideal of a normal family, I knew it would be good for Finn too.
Lorcan and his father hugged very briefly. It was obvious they had trouble showing affection. It was almost endearing. “Father, this is my wife, Aislinn, and this is Finn.”
I took Devaney senior’s hand and smiled nervously.
“Good to finally meet you, Aislinn. It’s unfortunate that your husband didn’t think it necessary to introduce us before your wedding.” The last was said with reproach in Lorcan’s direction. “Call me Thomas.”
I blinked, surprised. “Nice to meet you, Thomas. I wish you could have been at our wedding.” Back then, I had been relieved about his absence, but now I wished we’d had a wedding with both of our entire families present.
“Then my son and you should have married in Ireland as was expected.”
I flushed. Lorcan leaned down and whispered in my ear. “Now that’s he’s guilt-tripping you, you’re truly a part of our family.”
Thomas narrowed his eyes. “Don’t listen to whatever he’s saying. He’s been a thorn in my side since birth.”
I smiled sheepishly, unsure how to react to their constant banter.
Thomas turned to Finn, who was half hidden behind me. “Young man, welcome to the family. Do you like skeet shooting?”
Finn frowned.
“I’ll show you later,” Thomas said. “How about you call me gramps?”
After a look at me and Lorcan, he gave a small nod.
“Come on in. We’re letting the cold in.”
We went into the huge entrance hall of the mansion. A long, colorful silk carpet gave the room a cozy look. A grand staircase led to the first floor. The steps had a slight dip in the center from centuries of use. Tapestries with hunting scenes decorated the walls, and a fireplace added to the cozy atmosphere. We moved on to a sort of living room, that also had a fireplace, albeit a bigger one.
“The big fireplace is in the fireplace room,” Lorcan said with a wink.
“Of course,” I muttered under my breath.
Finn’s mouth hung open as he scanned our surroundings. One of the Wolfhounds came up to him, and he patted him carefully. The dog was taller than Finn.
“They’re docile,” Lorcan assured me again.
“Do you like chocolate cake?” Thomas asked Finn. He nodded enthusiastically.
“My cook baked one for you. Let’s go into the kitchen.”
I gave Finn an encouraging smile, and he took Thomas’s hand. I bit my lip as I watched them walk away.
“Dad’s good with kids.”
Finn seemed to like the old man, just like he’d liked Lorcan from the start.
“Do you want a tour of the house?”
“Don’t call it house. It’s a castle, but yes.”
Lorcan took my hand and led me back into the entrance hall then upstairs. “Only Aran is here. Balor, Callahan and Caden will arrive later today.”
The silk carpets in all the rooms must have cost a fortune. They looked hand-crafted and ancient. My lips parted in astonishment as Lorcan led me through the first floor then the second and third. My mouth didn’t close as we discovered the many rooms, staircases, and even the attic. Nobody needed that much room, but I was in love with the place.
The manor belonged in a horror movie. Hitchcock would have certainly found great inspiration in every nook and cranny of the huge place. It was perfect.
Sheep grazed the slopes surrounding the manor, and horses joined them a bit further out.
“Who takes care of this when you all live in Dublin?”
“A groundskeeper lives in the house we drove past but there’s always been at least one of us living under the roof at any given time. It was never deserted. Father always said a house needs to be lived in to qualify as a home.”
I nodded, remembering the small stone house down the driveway. Thomas was right. It would have been a waste to have a manor like this and only have it taken care of instead of lived in.
Lorcan led me into the hallway then opened the door to a broom cupboard. I raised my eyebrows. “That’s where I caught Balor and his first love doing the deed.” He pulled me into the cupboard and closed the door, cloaking us in darkness. I didn’t even want to think about all the spiders hiding here. The dark made me increasingly nervous.
“Lorcan, what—”
His warm hands pushed up my dress, and I could feel him get down on his knees. He tugged my panties to the side.
“Lorcan, what if someone catches us?”
He kissed my folds then slid his tongue between them. I gripped his head and widened my stance to give him better access as his tongue stroked along my sensitive flesh with skilled precision. Fifteen minutes later, Lorcan and I emerged from the cupboard, my skin flushed from two orgasms thanks to Lorcan’s tongue and fingers. My core still pulsated slightly. It took my eyes a moment to get used to the light, and when I saw Lorcan, I bit my lip. His lips were shiny and his chin and cheeks red from friction.
“Everyone will know what we were up to!”
Lorcan took my hand and pulled me down the hallway. “We’re not heading downstairs yet. There are more cupboards to explore.”
In the next cupboard, it was my turn to give back with my mouth. When we emerged from that room, I knew without looking at myself in the mirror, that my lips were swollen and red.
The next one, Lorcan lifted me off the ground and wrapped my legs around his waist so he could fuck me against the wall. By now I was too wrapped up in the pleasure to worry if someone could hear the sounds of Lorcan’s thrusts slamming me against the wall. I was lost to the feel of him, his passionate kisses. Surrounded by darkness, my other senses heightened, making every stroke of Lorcan’s length more intense. When we both exploded, Lorcan sank to the ground with me sitting on his lap. We stayed like that for a long time, simply listening to each other’s ragged breathing and basking in the afterglow of our lovemaking.
I froze. It was the first time I thought of it like that. Was it more than fucking? Right now, right here, in the dark it felt like it.
“What’s up?” Lorcan rumbled against my cheek.
“What is this?”
“Shouldn’t you know by now?”
I shook my head, my throat tight. “It doesn’t feel like fucking.”
My voice was barely audible.
“No?”
“It feels like more.”
Lorcan kissed my lips and cupped my head. I was glad for the blackness as it made this conversation easier. “It does.”
We remained in silence for quite a bit.
“Like…” I swallowed. Was it too soon?
“Like lovemaking,” Lorcan murmured.
I nodded. He couldn’t see it, but he could feel it. “I’m scared of calling it that,” I admitted.
The last few weeks had been intense. Lorcan had stood by my side, had helped me with Finn and Imogen. We’d really worked together as a couple, maybe because the circumstances prevented us from looking at our egos.
“I fell for you a long time ago. I’m not scared of anything. Not even my feelings for you, sweet Aislinn.”
I shivered. Lorcan was still buried inside of me, our bodies still intimately connected and now it felt as if our souls had the same connection. “I didn’t want to develop feelings for you.”
Lorcan kissed me slowly. I wrapped my arms tightly around him. “I think I love you.”
“I think I love you too,” Lorcan said with a small chuckle. Our lips touched again and we kissed in the dark for a long time, forgetting all else.
Lorcan
When Aislinn and I crossed Aran on the way downstairs, he gave me a wink. It was probably still obvious what Aislinn and I had been up to.
“Let’s go outside for a breath of fresh air,” I said, tugging Aislinn into the conservatory and onto the elevated terrace overlooking the cottage garden and the ocean further down.
Aislinn leaned against me. We hadn’t talked since we’d left the darkness of the cupboard. It was too soon for us to affirm our words in the light of day. In the dark we had the chance to admit to something we both weren’t ready for otherwise.
The cold wind tugged at us, but we let it. I glanced down at Aislinn. Her face was no longer flushed and sweaty from our lovemaking. Now her cheeks and nose were rosy from the cold. “Let’s go in.”
She gave a small nod and followed me inside, our hands linked.
My brothers had arrived by now and soon we all settled around the long table. Father’s cook and maid, Doreann, had cooked up a delicious feast of several meat and chicken pies, pea soup, soda bread and apple cake. She served it with cider from her family’s apple orchard. I could see that the tasty food relaxed Aislinn, and Finn was listening curiously to my father’s hunting tales. For the first time since Imogen’s accident, Aislinn looked truly relaxed. Maybe she’d finally accepted that her sister’s state wouldn’t change soon and that she had a life to live too.
After dinner, we all settled in the fireplace room. There were enough couches and armchairs strewn about for everyone. Father cornered me before I could sit down beside Aislinn, who was relaxing on the couch closest to the fire.
“She won’t make it easy for you.”
I smiled wryly. “Believe me, I know. Did Mum make it easy for you?”
Father chuckled, his eyes wistful. “Oh no. She challenged my patience every day. I miss her.”
I squeezed his arm.
“Go to your wife. I promised the boy another story about wild boar hunts.”
Father sank down beside Finn on a sheep skin in front of the fireplace with all three Wolfhounds stretched out around them. Finn’s eyes widened at something Father said. Father knew how to spin an engaging tale. He was good at twisting the truth a bit. It’s what made him a successful business man.
I made my way over to Aislinn, sank down and pulled her against my side. Balor and Aran were busy discussing business and the twins were drinking from flasks, though they were already drunk. “I hope Caden doesn’t puke into the flames again.”
Aislinn’s eyes widened, then her gaze returned to Finn. In a couple of days, we’d head to Dublin to visit Aoife. Finn had missed her but when we’d asked him if he’d prefer to live with her again, he’d said he wanted to live with us. He was happy when we told him our plans to have him live with us indefinitely and assured him that he would still get to see his grandma as often as possible. Father was pleased that we’d have reason to return to Ireland more often.
An hour later, Finn lay curled up in front of the fireplace, fast asleep, Yeats stretched out beside him. Father had fallen asleep in his favorite armchair and was snoring away loudly. Aran had ushered Caden and Callahan outside a couple of minutes ago so they could puke into the bushes, so now only Balor remained. He regarded Aislinn and me with an unreadable expression then got up and gave me a nod. He needed a wife, but I knew his heart still belonged to the woman he hadn’t seen in a decade.
I stroked Aislinn’s arm. She tilted her head back and gave me a tired smile. I kissed her gently then rested my cheek on top of her head. I felt ready to fall asleep, soothed by the heat of the fire and Aislinn’s soft body against mine. We hadn’t arrived where we wanted to be yet, but we were on the right track.
