“I’ve got myself a missing puzzle piece”—Like All My Friends by Francis Karel
“I get the whole thing with your ex and that you want to get back at your sister,” Lily says, her eyes focused on her boyfriend as he skates past us. “But isn’t it kind of cruel to your parents?”
The scoreboard reads 3-1 for the opponents, whoever they are. I don’t care much about hockey, but Lily asked me to come, and I couldn’t say no. As far as I know, Brooklyn is with her aunt today, which means we don’t have to take care of her during this game, so truly, if it weren’t for my best friend, I’d be in my dorm room studying.
“Why would it be cruel to them?”
Lily sighs, turning her head to look at me just when Aaron goals. She doesn’t even acknowledge the crowd going wild. “They loved Aaron. I’m sure your mother will be sad when she finds out you two ‘broke up’. Especially after seeing you act all in love for two whole weeks.”
I really don’t care. “She wasn’t sad when I told her Leon cheated on me.”
“Leon isn’t Aaron.”
That he is not.
I didn’t spend years crying about Leon, but I spend an unhealthy number of years crying to my mother about how much I miss Aaron and Lily. Almost every single night for at least five years, I used to tell her how Aaron is going to come find me eventually, how everything is going to turn out just the way I always dreamed of. I grew older, so after the age of thirteen, I kept these thoughts to myself.
“I’m sure my mother will get over my fake breakup.” She would, but I sure will hear a hell lot of questions over said breakup.
Lily hums like she’s not sure whether she should believe me or not. “Are you going to be okay after the breakup?”
Our eyes meet. Hers calling me out on whatever bullshit I’m about to tell her, mine probably telling her a million different stories at once. “Sure. It’s not like we’re actually dating. No commitment. No feelings. We’re just putting on a show for my family and that’s it.”
“You know, Colin and I were fake dating.”
“You were?” My eyebrows quip up in surprise.
“Ah, well… sort of. He tried keeping me from committing suicide and was a little scared Aaron would murder him if he was just ‘playing’ me. And I kind of found out Aaron didn’t want Colin to fuck me unless we were together, so there’s that too.”
Committing suicide? What the fuck. Like, I guessed something bad happened to Lily. The Lily I knew was never this quiet, but I didn’t think she was trying to fucking kill herself. And how could she say it so… casually?
“Lily… I had no idea.”
She shrugs. “It’s fine, honestly. I am happy now. I have a great boyfriend, and his friends are actually really awesome, too. I have you back as well. And, yeah, maybe sometimes it’s still a little difficult, but then I just rant to Colin, and he’ll make me feel better.” Lily nudges me with her elbow. “But back to you. You’re so totally going to fall for him.”
Lily’s lips press together into a thin line as she keeps herself from either smiling or calling me out. It wouldn’t matter if she were to call me out because I have to believe what my mouth says.
I cannot get Aaron and my relationship confused.
“I gave you enough time to regret your decision from last Saturday, so tell me… do you really think Grey is hotter than Aaron? I mean, I do think that but I’m Aaron’s sister so it would be weird if I thought he was—” Lily shakes out her body at the thought of saying her brother was hot. Maybe if I didn’t have a brother myself, I’d find it questionable, but as someone with a brother, I can totally relate to the shudder of disgust.
“He’s an Asian God. Of course he’s hot.”
Lily starts to laugh but stops as the guys sitting behind us shush her madly. “What about Miles?”
“Miles isn’t ugly either,” I say. It’s the truth. Miles is good-looking. He has blond hair, just like Aaron, maybe a bit darker. His eyes are blue instead of green. He doesn’t have freckles, but I don’t think they’d suit him anyway.
Miles has a sharp jawline, cheekbones that could cut you. His face is a bit too symmetrical for my liking, but he’s still handsome.
But Aaron has all that too… not the too symmetrical face, but he’s nearly perfection.
Yes, Sofia, keep comparing guys to Aaron. You always looked for reasons to dislike someone.
Lily looks toward the ice again, mumbling something unintelligible as she scans the players to find Colin. “Before Colin and I were dating, he hated Miles being around me. Not when Colin was there, too, but you know, when Miles was alone with me.”
Can’t blame him. The first week of me staying at the dorms, I’ve had tons of other girls warn me off of Miles, said he’d only use one for sex and then disappear. I’m not sure if the rumors are true, but as far as I can tell, he’s busy taking care of his daughter all day. There’s no time for fucking everyone on campus.
“But you only said Grey to annoy Aaron, didn’t you?”
Sighing, I nod. It’s useless to lie to Lily. Sometimes I think she has developed the ability to read minds because as it seems, she always knows exactly what I want to say or how I feel.
We spend the rest of the game not talking about Aaron and me anymore, not that there is an Aaron and me. Lily made up her own mind about us, and no matter what I will tell her, she won’t stop holding on to what she believes. She’s always been stubborn like that, doubt it has changed.
When someone starts knocking on the tempered glass, I first think it’s Aaron to tell us practice is over, but I’m surprised to find it’s Colin.
He nods at Lily, and when I look at her, I find her smiling brighter than the sun.
Colin yells something, but it’s almost incoherent with all the sounds in the arena, the glass between him and us and his helmet that also has yet another layer of resistance plastic.
Immediately, Lily shoots up from her seat and jogs over to the extra door that leads to the ice. It opens, only for Colin to pop his head out.
He takes off his helmet, then quickly presses his lips to Lily’s before he gets yelled at for doing anything but participating on the ice by his own father.
The sight of them being so disgustingly in love makes me nauseous. I’m happy for them, truly, but being this crazy in love sure has everyone around them roll their eyes.
And yet I can’t help but wonder when it’s finally going to be my turn. When will I find this kind of love? The gut-wrenching, feel-good kind of love I read and write about.
