I felt like a fucking idiot.
For the past several weeks, I did everything I could to salvage my relationships. I spent more time with Finn and my mom, Deck and Colin, and Mr. Bailey. I stopped shuttering myself away despite the uncomfortable feeling that bloomed in my chest sometimes.
I knew I had to be a better man for myself, for them, and for Joanna. She might not ever forgive me for pushing her away—punishing her for my own fears—but until I was worthy, I was determined to work on myself.
I was so fucking proud of her. Word spread quickly in the county about Project Eir, and the buzz in our community swelled with pride for our girl. Once I had heard that she was planning a big event, I knew it was time.
Blowing out a stream of breath, I dialed the number.
“Hello?”
“Hi, is this Honey?”
“Well, holy shit.”
So much for subtlety. I cleared my throat.“Hi, Honey, it’s Lincoln.”
“Oh, I know who you are.” Well, she wasn’t giving me an inch.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
She hadn’t hung up on me yet so I took the opening. “I need your help.”
“What in the world makes you think that I would help you with shit?” I had to smile at Honey’s loyalty to her sister. I liked knowing Joanna had someone to watch her back.
“I need to see her,” I started. “More than that, I need to make up for everything I put her through, the things I said to her.”
“You pushed her away, Lincoln. It’s not easy for her to be vulnerable, and the second she was, you destroyed her.”
My voice was thick with emotion. “I know. I thought I was protecting her.”
“Protecting her from what?!” Her voice pitched upward.
“I don’t even know anymore. Myself, maybe? I’m aware that she deserves so much more than me, but I’ll be damned if another asshole takes my place. I need to show her it’s always been her.” I hissed out a breath. Saying all that out loud wasn’t easy, and my insides felt raw.
Honey’s voice softened at my confession, but her words were daggers. “Well, you better not fuck this up again or I’ll have your head on a platter.”
