I knock on my mother’s bedroom door. We usually have dinner together as a family at least every few days, but she hasn’t been coming down to eat with us. According to the staff, she hasn’t been eating much at all.
“Mom?”
She opens her door, and I stare at her in shock. Her eyes are swollen and red, her hair is messy, and she’s wearing a house robe. I’ve never seen her so… undone.
She sniffs and tries her best to smile at me. “I’m sorry, Alec. I just… I don’t feel well.”
I nod at her. “But you need to eat something. Please?”
She looks at me and sighs as she walks out of her room and down the stairs, not even bothering to change or comb her hair. Her movements are mechanical, as if she’s merely doing me a favor. I barely even recognize her. Just a few weeks ago, she’d never have dreamt of walking around like this—not even around the house.
I follow her down, worried sick. Elena, Lucian, and Sarah are already seated. They smile, but Mom doesn’t smile back.
“How are you feeling?” Sarah asks.
Mom looks up, and the two of them exchange a look, one of understanding. “Anthony told me to courier him the divorce papers. He won’t even come down to speak to me, to fight for me.”
I stare at her with wide eyes. I didn’t know any of this. I haven’t spoken to my father in months. Neither Lucian nor I ever speak to him anymore, and he doesn’t reach out either.
Sarah grabs Mom’s hand and nods. “Probably for the best. A clean break is what you need.”
Mom inhales shakily. “Thankfully, there isn’t much he can take. Most of our assets are owned by the company, which in turn is owned by my father. I’ll lose some of my property and a decent amount of money, but he won’t be able to get his hands on much more than that.”
I breathe a sigh of relief. Thank God, Grandpa is alive and well. If Mom had inherited his shares, we’d be in so much trouble—she’d have to give my father half.
Mom barely touches her food, and I see the anxiety in Elena’s eyes. She keeps adding small amounts of my mother’s favorite foods to her plate, but Mom won’t touch any of it.
Throughout dinner, Elena offers to take her on a spa day, and Lucian offers to take her shopping, but she isn’t interested at all.
I’m terrified she’ll fall back into the same depression she’d only just about staved off when I married Elena. She kept herself going by keeping up a facade, but now the whole world has seen her fall. She hasn’t left the house ever since my father made the news, and at this rate, she won’t.
I don’t know what to do. I’m used to almost everything being within my control, but this… there’s nothing I can do about this.
Mom rises as soon as everyone’s done eating and disappears before I can even stop her. Every once in a while, we’ll play card games together, and I was hoping to convince her to do that today, but she slipped away before I even had a chance.
I’m restless as I walk back up the stairs, Elena right behind me. She follows me into our sitting room and takes a seat on her favorite chair, as worried and absentminded as I am.
I pour myself a glass of whiskey and tip it back before refilling my glass. “Do you want a drink?”
Elena shakes her head. She pulls her feet up on the chair, her arms wrapped around herself.
I sit down opposite her, the two of us facing each other the way we did when I proposed to her. I drink her in, her long hair falling down her waist, her beautiful face, those stunning eyes of hers. What would have happened if I hadn’t run into her that day? The thought of what she almost did tears me apart, but I can’t help but wonder whether I made the right choice by chaining her to me. Will she end up like my mother, eventually? She and my mother have the same heart. She’s a hopeless romantic. She tries to deny it, both to herself and me, but she can’t help herself. She isn’t like me. Elena cares about the little things, the way my mother does. She likes having dinner together, falling asleep together. If I’m not home for a couple of days, she gets restless. Elena cares. She cares about everything, about everyone around us.
I adore that about her, but it’s also something that’ll hurt her in the end. Our marriage… it’ll never be enough for her. She’ll always want more. I see it in her eyes. She wants things I can’t give her. She sees things that aren’t there.
Elena looks up at me and smiles. “She’ll be okay, you know? It’ll be difficult, but we’re here for her. In the end, she’ll be better off without your father. She’ll have a chance to live her life the way she wants to, without pretenses.”
I nod. “Without pretenses… yeah, I guess—except I’m not sure my mother even knows who she is anymore.”
Just like my mother, Elena is losing sight of who she is. I see her light dim every day. It’s not just everything that went down with her father. It’s more than that. It’s me. The way she looks at me… I see her heart break every time I kiss her.
Seeing my mother fall apart kills me. It kills me, and it terrifies me. I’m scared I’m pushing Elena down the same path my mother was on. I’m scared she’ll one day find her life empty, that she’ll realize she gave up too much for me. She’ll find herself unloved, alone, the way my mother did. The things she wants from me, I can never give her. I have no love left to give in this lifetime. And even if I did… I know love doesn’t last. It doesn’t, yet Elena won’t stop longing for it.
