I work with Mara through the next several days. The orc settlement is large and requires careful management to keep everything running smoothly, and the king’s cousin oversees it all with an eagle eye for detail. We visit every part of the underground village, and Mara stops to introduce me to everyone we meet. The orcs are kind but wary, which is understandable—but not one of them treats me with disrespect or judgment.
I try to imagine what would happen if Mara came to live in my old human village, and cringe. Humans would be much less welcoming to an orc than orcs are of me, and I’m more and more ashamed of my earlier prejudice about their race.
She explains that her role—that of the steward—would generally fall to me, as the queen, but I assure her that I have no intention of taking it from her unless she wants to do something else. We agree that she would be my teacher for as long as necessary, which is a relief. I am in no way equipped for running an operation of this magnitude yet.
I don’t often see the king during the day. His duties center around protecting the Hill from outsiders, both orcs and humans, who might covet what he has built here for his people. He also takes care of trading with the neighboring towns, such as Ultrup, where I’d been bought at auction, and hunting to provide for the many hungry mouths that live here. In the kitchens, Mara explains how they are already preparing food for the long winter months, storing casks of salted meat and preserved produce in cold cellars to last through the infertile part of the year.
Everyone in the anthill-like village has a role, and though orcs love to celebrate and enjoy themselves in the evenings, they’re hard workers. I do my best to follow their example, and I drag myself back to our room every night, exhausted but happy.
Yet I’m never too tired for Gorvor. We find each other in the dark, joining in slow, languid strokes or quickly, with mingling breaths, until we shatter in mutual pleasure.
One night, after our lovemaking and a bath that led to more petting and stroking, I lie naked on top of Gorvor’s chest, idly drawing patterns on his still-damp skin. His eyes are closed, his breaths even and deep, and this might not be the best time to start an uncomfortable conversation, but I can no longer hold back my questions.
“Gorvor?” I poke him lightly in his rock-hard chest.
“Hmm?” He cracks one eye open and peers at me.
I shuffle off him and draw my legs in, looking down at his face. “Listen, I’ve been meaning to ask you something, but there’s never been a good opportunity.”
He lifts himself on his elbows. “Anything you want, you can ask.”
My heart warms at the words. He means it. He really does. So why am I so nervous talking about this?
“I wanted to ask you about the four orcs who wear the boar emblem,” I say. “I’ve seen them around, and they always seem to be alone.”
The king’s expression shutters, and he sits up fully, creating a gap between us. I shiver, missing his heat instantly. He remains silent, though, so I soldier on.
“It’s just that Vark and Steagor seem so suspicious of them,” I press. “And when the other guards, Neekar and Ozork, saw them, Ozork had to haul Neekar away to stop him from jumping on them. And Mara won’t talk about what’s going on.”
“I should hope not,” Gorvor barks. “It’s not her place.”
I push my hair back, worry and frustration warring inside me. “But I don’t understand. Are they your enemies? Then why are they here? They don’t seem to do anything, they just lurk around and pop up at strange moments.”
Just yesterday, I caught their leader staring at me intently from the other side of the great hall when I was helping Mara. He’d looked away, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that his intentions weren’t good.
“That doesn’t concern you,” he answers, scowling. “You only need to make sure you stay away from the Boar Clan orcs. I thought Vark and Steagor understood their orders, but maybe I need to change your guard. Or assign more warriors to you if they’re unable to keep them away from you.”
The Boar Clan orcs. At least I can put a name to them, sort of.
“There’s no need for that.” I gather the sheets around me, suddenly feeling very naked. I’ve never heard him speak so harshly to me, in such a cold voice. “It wasn’t their fault, and I didn’t even talk to those orcs. Please, I don’t want to get the guards in trouble. Vark and Steagor did everything right. I was never in any danger.”
Gorvor’s chest heaves with a deep breath. “Still, I will talk to them.”
“And you won’t tell me anything?” I ask, dismayed. “I don’t even know why I must avoid them.”
“No,” he snaps. “And your king’s order should be enough for you to obey it.”
I draw back, stung. He’s never used his position to bully me into anything before.
“All right, my lord,” I reply quietly. “I shall obey.”
I slip from the bed and walk over to my chest. Every night since I’ve become Gorvor’s mate, I’ve slept naked beside him, and loved it. But tonight, I feel like I need a shield between us, so I pull on a simple shift and tie it around my waist.
“Dawn.” My name falls from his lips on a long exhale.
I stiffen but don’t reply. He hurt me, and I won’t be so easily swayed. Walking to the lantern hanging by the door, placed there for my benefit, I blow out its flame and make my careful way back to bed in the dark. I perch on the end of the bed, fluff my pillow, and lie as far away from Gorvor as possible, facing away from him.
The bed dips behind me, and strong arms wrap around my body. He tugs me into the center of the bed, against his chest. He buries his face in my hair. “I’m sorry.”
I wait for an explanation, for something more, but it doesn’t come. He’s sorry for the way he treated me but not for keeping the truth from me.
Inside me, two impulses are at war, one demanding that I should ferret out his secrets by any means possible, the other insisting that Gorvor is a king, therefore entitled to keep things from me if he so chooses.
Am I stupid for trusting a man who does not trust me in turn?
Have you told him all your deepest secrets, then?
Guilt washes over me, and I roll into his embrace, settling down to sleep. Gorvor presses a kiss on top of my head and soon dozes off, his heartbeat slowing.
But I lie awake for a long time, trying to figure out how to go on.
