Present
I speed-walked down the busy street, swerving around pedestrians with one hand in my coat pocket and the other holding a large envelope with yet another contract for Kai to sign. He was supposed to be at the dojo, but when I got back from my errands this morning, he’d texted, telling me to meet him at his club instead. He knew I didn’t have a car, dammit.
And I wasn’t ready to face him.
Last night, in that hotel, buried on a secret floor and in a room with no phones, no television, and no one but us, it was unimaginable. Like a dream that I was pulled away from and kept closing my eyes to chase sleep again just so I could go back there. Was that only a few hours ago?
He’d tried to pry a little more information out of me last night, but he didn’t push too hard. When my guard went up, I knew he didn’t want to ruin what just happened. He was good about reading my signals, I’d give him that.
He’d wanted to take me home, but I was gone before he could fight me again. I dived into the rainy night, everything that had felt so good, suddenly ebbing away, and I didn’t know how to get it back. Guilt and shame, the feeling of Damon’s eyes on me, judging me, why couldn’t I get over it?
So, I fucked a guy. Who cares? I liked it. Sue me.
But it was daytime now, and the consequences might be slow, but they were coming. My skills didn’t extend far enough to juggle my desire for one and the demands of another.
Jogging up the steps of Hunter-Bailey, I swung open one of the double doors and walked inside, the citrus furniture polish immediately surrounding me. Wood shone everywhere, and the grandfather clock in the lobby ticked by to my left.
I stepped up to the small desk. “I need to see Kai Mori, please.”
The young man, black hair and in a simple suit with a thin tie, nodded as if expecting me.
“He’ll still be in the lounge.” He walked around his station toward the next set of double doors. “Just take a right as you enter the dining room.”
Hmm. Women weren’t typically allowed in the club. I was surprised he was letting me in so easily. I guess Kai took care of that.
He cast open the doors, stepping aside so I could enter, and I immediately veered to the left, briefly noticing all of the staff in the dining room setting the tables for lunch.
Entering the lounge, I looked around for a moment, taking in the den-like feel of the large room. Brown leather couches gleamed in the lamp light, while forest green drapes dressed floor-to-ceiling windows around the room. Gold sconces, deer, elk, and even a lion head were hung high above, and plaid throw pillows were tossed on chairs and sofas. A bar lay at the back, shelves of books lined the walls, and a tapestry depicting some kind of war hung over the fireplace.
Christ. This room was decorated with the theme “If the Nazis had won…”
I scanned the room, quickly spotting Kai over by the windows. His coat was off, his sleeves were rolled up, and my mouth suddenly went dry at the sight of him. It almost hurt to look as he sat there, hunched over a table of papers.
Those hands were all about me last night. And that beautiful, stern expression that looked almost angry and kind of made me want to smile was lost in pleasure the last time I saw it.
So controlled and so cold, but he could be so rough, too.
Michael and Will sat on either side of him, one on his phone and the other slouched in his chair with his rocks glass pressed to his forehead and his eyes closed. I made my way over, ignoring glances from the dozen or so other gentlemen in the room.
Kai glanced up as I approached. “You’re late.”
His tone was curt, but his mouth wasn’t, curled at the corners as if he was just thinking about why I barely got any sleep last night.
“I had to go to Thunder Bay this morning,” I told him.
“Why?”
“Gabriel wants to know why you haven’t signed the contract.”
He stopped what he was doing and looked at me again. Michael turned away from his phone.
“What did you tell him?” Kai asked.
I tossed the envelope with a fresh contract inside on the table in front of him. Some of his papers fluttered about in protest. “That you’re delaying,” I said. “The same thing I’ve been telling him.”
“What—”
But he stopped whatever he was going to say, picking up his phone that was buzzing.
Annoyance on his face, he answered. “Yeah.”
He listened while someone on the other end talked, his eyebrows digging in farther.
“A&J Plumbing?” he said, sounding confused. “I didn’t call any—”
I leaned over the table and held out my hand.
He stopped, looking at me. I grabbed the phone.
“I left the keys for him in an envelope under the desk,” I told the kid at the dojo whom I knew was on the other end, “and I turned off the alarm system at the house for him. Tell him to start upstairs in the bathrooms. I need a full estimate as soon as possible.”
“Uh, yes, ma’am,” he stuttered, and I hung up.
I’d made the call to arrange for plumbers, electricians, and contractors on my way back from Thunder Bay. I figured I’d be at the dojo, though, so I thought I was meeting him there.
I handed Kai’s phone back to him.
“Is that for my house?” he questioned. “What did I tell you?”
I straightened, sticking my hands in my pockets. “Vanessa arrives in three days,” I told him.
His scowl slowly fell away, and I saw Will out of the corner of my eye put his drink down and lift his head up.
Kai said nothing.
“Part of the update from Gabriel this morning,” I explained, feeling the same knot build in my stomach that I had when Gabriel told me. “Surreal, isn’t it? What you’ve gotten yourself into?”
All three of them just sat there, and I didn’t know if they were stunned or mad or what, but they definitely weren’t happy.
“I’m sure you fancy yourself the architect of some grand scheme,” I continued, “but the agreement you made moves forward regardless of whether or not you’re ready. Your bride will soon be on her way here. I’ve arranged a suite at the Mandarin for her while we do repairs at the house.”
Kai picked up the envelope, his jaw flexing as he ripped it open, pulled out the paperwork, and began flipping through pages.
“He didn’t make the revisions,” he said, scanning it.
“Nor will he, I dare say. Take it or leave it.”
Kai was cornered, and he knew it. But really, what was the problem? He knew how to get on the twelfth floor now. He didn’t need the hotel, and he didn’t want any connection to the Torrance family. Why not just back out? Why had he agreed in the first place?
“If I don’t sign, it’s open season on Damon,” he warned. “Michael, me, Will, Rika…we’ll handle it, and we’ll do it any way we like.”
I nodded, understanding. If he didn’t sign, Damon would have no promise that he’d be welcome back in the city. If he came home, they might go after him.
“But if I don’t sign,” he said, his voice lower, “you’ll leave.”
I’ll leave? Is that what was binding him to this stupid agreement?
I saw the lump move in his throat.
He didn’t want me to go.
And I’m not sure how much I wanted to anymore, but that contract couldn’t make me stay if I really wanted to leave. He had to know that. I was only here at Gabriel’s behest.
“I can leave any time I want,” I reminded him.
“You would go back to him, wouldn’t you?”
I dropped my eyes, not wanting to have this discussion and especially not wanting to have it in front of his friends.
His voice was eerily calm. “Do you want me to sign it?”
“Yes,” I gritted out. “I want Damon home.”
He watched me, his eyes hard, but he didn’t make any other move. The guys listened silently.
“I woke up last night, wanting you again,” he said.
My heart pumped harder, the heat of embarrassment rising to my cheeks.
Leaning back in his cushioned chair, he drew in a deep breath. “I fucked up, guys,” he said, this time to his friends.
Michael looked over at him. “We want what we want, right?”
Kai shook his head at me.
So, Damon wasn’t the only goal here. Somewhere along the way, it had become about me, too. Gabriel made me work for Kai, so I did. But no contract, no Banks.
“You wear his clothes,” Kai said to me. “You barely eat. He controls your freedom, your food, your friendships…. What do you want, kid? If you were him, if you were a man, what would you do? What would you take?”
I shot off, rounding Will’s chair and came up next to Kai. Leaning down, I snatched the contract from the table and one of his fountain pens, flipping to the final page. I quickly scrawled Kai Mori in his damn near-exact handwriting as I’d seen on other documents at the dojo.
Throwing the pen down, I flipped the contract back into place, slid it into the torn envelope, and handed it to him.
Let’s end this. I was calling his bluff. Call off this idiotic agreement and let me go, or give the papers to Gabriel and let my brother come home.
“Now you have a slave until your wedding,” I challenged him. “What will you do with me? Order my clothes off right here and bend me over the table, big boy?”
He took the envelope, a bitter grin on his lips. “Nah. That’s nice and sweet. Something I’ll do to the new little wife,” he taunted. “My toys get a little more wear and tear.”
I heard Will snort to my left and then he blew out a breath. “Damn.”
Michael ran a hand over his face, looking exasperated, and Kai just stared at me. He stood, picking up his jacket from the chair and rolling back down his sleeves.
“Get to the dojo,” he ordered me. “It’s going to be a long day.”
Hours later, and I was sweltering. He was working my ass off.
After I’d dealt with the plumber and two contractors who both told me a year was a reasonable estimate for that piece of shit hovel Kai lived in, I’d made it back to the dojo to spend the rest of the fucking day dealing with grunt crap. A washing machine exploded, some dumbass Storm player friend of Michael’s dropped his cell phone in the toilet, a chick on her fourth aikido class this week puked in the lobby, and why the fuck was I dealing with this bullshit?
Kai was pissed, and I kept talking myself out of walking out today. No one could keep me here, and I wasn’t bound to a stupid contract. I told myself it was for my brother. Sit tight and just breathe until it was time.
I told myself I wouldn’t let Kai win. He was trying to push me, and my pride was at stake.
And I told myself I had a duty. I’d made a commitment to Gabriel’s house, and I would not bend.
But the truth was, I had nowhere else to go. I’d gotten a paycheck today. A real check, made out to Cash for more of a wage than I made in a month with my father. If I left now without another plan, I was going to be alone. Gabriel wouldn’t take me back if I broke the deal, and I’d be out of the loop, unable to be Damon’s eyes and ears any longer.
I had every reason to stay.
But my temper wasn’t made any better when Rika and Alex walked in while I was mopping up chunks off the floor, their rivers of hair, hundred-dollar perfume, and cute short shorts in sixty-degree weather amplifying all the shit I was feeling.
Especially my jealousy.
Every inch of Kai that touched me last night had touched her once.
I’d always resented her. From the moment I’d first heard about her, Michael, and Kai in the steam room at Hunter-Bailey. But things were different now. My attachment to Kai was growing, and every moment he and I were in the same room and he wasn’t touching me made me long for him more.
I hated that they saw each other every goddamn day. I could barely contain my hatred as I stared at her back as she walked to the locker room.
I finished tossing the dirty towels into the washer, and I charged out of the laundry room, shoving the swinging door so hard it hit the wall.
It was time to go home. I needed a break and a nice, long walk away from here.
I headed into the office to tell Kai, but he wasn’t there. I was about to leave and look for him, but the landline on the desk started ringing. I quickly picked it up.
“Sensou.”
“Who is this?” A guy asked, sounding confused.
“Who’s this?” I shot back.
“Oh. Banks,” he said, finally placing my voice. “It’s Michael. Where’s Kai?”
I took the cordless and drifted into the hallway, looking lazily left to right. “Walked off for a few minutes, I guess. Can I give him a message?”
“No. I don’t trust you, remember?”
I laughed under my breath, strolling farther down the hallway. “That’s wise of you, Michael. You’re learning.”
But I stopped, seeing Rika and Kai in the lobby. I remained hidden in the hall, watching them chat. The sternness that always hardened his eyes into the look of a perpetual student was gentler now. Relaxed.
It was hard to breathe.
He stood too close. Smiled too softly at her and touched her arm too long.
“But you trust Kai?” I asked Michael, still staring at them. “With all of your treasures?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
I shook my head, watching as Kai made his way for the Great Room and Rika came my way, back down the hallway.
I turned, relaxing into the wall and looking down as she passed. She disappeared into one of the workout rooms.
I cleared my throat. “Nothing,” I said. “I’m bored. Any message or not?”
He didn’t say anything.
“Fine, I’ll tell him you called.”
“Wait.”
I stopped, putting the receiver back to my ear. “Yes?”
I heard his sigh on the other end, but the guy clammed up again all of a sudden. I waited, hearing only silence.
“Hello?” I prodded.
“You think you’re so smart, don’t you?” he finally asked. “Okay, then. If you were me, in my situation, what would you do to strengthen your hold on all your irons in the fire? You said we were weak. Where? With what?”
I nearly laughed. Was he serious?
I strolled back down the hallway, suddenly intrigued. “Are you asking me for advice?”
“I’m asking you to put your money where your smart mouth is, brat,” he bit out. “Pretend you run my crew now. What do you do?”
“What makes you think I’d help you?”
“Because I think you’re dying for some real use of your skills.”
Well, he was right there. Kai wasn’t using me to my full potential, and I loved having a seat at the table. I’d kill to tell him exactly what I thought of him and his junior high operation.
I stopped at the entrance to the workout room and stood back, watching Rika throw blocks against her Wing Chun Dummy. She maneuvered, hitting the posts fast but methodical, pausing every so often to correct her stance.
And it suddenly hit me.
Michael was stroking my pride.
“Sensou” meant “war” in Japanese. This place, the name, what they did here…it was part of a larger goal.
Rika might be soft, but she was training. Michael might be careless, but he was aware. Will might be weak, but he had Kai.
And Kai was getting ready.
These people were my enemies.
“If I were you,” I replied calmly. “The first thing I’d do is fire me. I’m not your friend.”
And I ended the call.
I wanted this over.
I was sick of the go-around and waiting, and while I knew my brother was partly to blame for all the shit he found himself in last year, he had every reason to resent these people. They didn’t fight for him. So easily they gave him up, didn’t they?
And I had every reason to hate her.
I moved to the doorway, leaning against the frame and watching her work.
Even if Damon came home, even if some miracle reconciled him with his friends, and there was no longer any bad blood, Kai Mori would still never be anything more to me than he was right now. Not with her around. He’d fucked her, because he’d wanted her, and even if that desire lessened over time, it would never disappear. Just look at her. The perfect package. Smart, rich, pretty. And they all just thought she was the sweetest thing, too.
I brought my hands up, absently cracking my knuckles, bending each finger back until I heard the cracks and pops.
Yeah, anger was better. I’d gotten so lost last night, sinking into how good everything felt, being held and touched and kissed…. But it brought nothing but confusion.
Anger was a straight line. It had a target.
“Do you need something?”
I blinked, raising my eyes. Rika had her head turned, looking at me over her shoulder as she panted. I hadn’t realized she’d noticed me.
Unable to hide my amusement, I slowly stepped in the room, moving toward her. Damon and I had both inherited our father’s methodical nature, but Damon also had some patience. I didn’t.
“Have you ever actually been in a fight?” I asked, gesturing to the dummy.
“Yes. Why?” She straightened her back, making herself a little taller.
I walked around the wooden Wing Chun, appraising her. “You spend a lot of time on your stance and your form,” I told her. “Most people who fight are fighting to survive. There are no rules. No fair play. No time to maintain proper striking distance. All your plans will go out the window.”
“Don’t worry,” she assured me. “I know how to pull hair, scratch, and kick if I need to.”
“And bite,” I added, watching her turn back to her dummy. “When Damon ties you up again, show him what a scrapper you are. It’ll amuse him.”
She whipped around, fury in her eyes.
And I couldn’t stop the smile that peeked out. Yeah, I know all about Pithom, Michael’s family’s yacht, last year and how he scared her. Not that I approved at the time, but God, I hoped he was going to do everything he could to make trouble for her now.
I dropped my voice. “I know you kept the guys from going after him last year. I know you insist on staying at the penthouse alone, without protection, when Michael’s out of town.” I inched forward, not blinking once. “I also know you like a man’s hands on you, and they don’t necessarily have to be your fiancé’s, do they? So, when Damon comes for you, be sure to put up a good, little fight for measure, okay? That way Michael believes your lies when you tell him you didn’t want every inch of it.”
Her face twisted in fury, and she growled, swinging back her fist and knocking me across the jaw. I stumbled a step to the side, losing my breath and closing my eyes on reflex.
But the heat of adrenaline flooded my chest. Yes.
I quickly righted myself again, forcing myself to face her. The ache sank deep into the bone, and my skin burned. Touching the corner of my lip, I pulled my hand back, seeing blood on my fingertips.
“Thank you,” I told her.
Using everything I had, I twisted and whipped the back of my hand across her face, sending her flying to the floor. She caught herself, landing on her hands and knees, and I could hear her sucking in air, the wind having been knocked out of her. She pounded her fists onto the floor once, growling in anger, and before I knew it, she twisted around, lunged for me, and shoved her hands into my chest, both of us tumbling back onto the mats.
“What the fuck is your problem?” she bellowed, crashing down on top of me.
But I swung us around, sending her to the ground with me straddling her instead. Grabbing the blonde hair on the top of her head, I leaned in. “Just keeping your world in perspective, Erika Fane! Not everyone bows at your feet!”
I pounded my fist down into her face, but she shoved at me, making me lose my hold. I gripped her neck instead and slammed her twice more.
She snarled, knocking my hat off my head and yanking my hair, forcing my head down and my scalp to scream. I winced in pain.
Dammit!
I should’ve cut off my hair. Years ago. It was just the only part of me that was still Nik and not Banks, and I’d hung onto it for some reason.
I lost my hold on her, giving her just enough time to push me off. She released me, sitting up and throwing out her leg, kicking me in the stomach.
And I couldn’t breathe. My throat closed, and I struggled to inhale. I coughed, hunching over. Did my stomach go through my goddamn spine?
“Are you done?” she shouted, and I noticed she had a trickle of blood coming out of her nose.
A momentary pang of satisfaction hit me through the pain. She’d made me bleed, after all. It was only fair.
“Not just yet.” I launched for her, grabbing her neck again and curling my fingers so hard, my nails dug into her skin.
She gasped, her eyes going wide as she grabbed for my wrist. I knew I’d broken the skin.
Hands grabbed me from behind and pulled me away, off her.
“What the hell?” I heard Kai growl. I whipped my head around, briefly turning my glare on him.
He was still in his workout pants from before, but now sweat matted the ends of his hair and his chest glistened.
“No, screw that!” Rika shoved at Kai, seething. “Let’s finish this!”
I laughed under my breath, seeing the four crimson half-moons tattooed into her skin over her jugular where a small scar she already had sat. I gazed down at my nails, seeing blood mixed with the dirt.
I lurched for her again, but Kai caught me, yanking me back.
“Enough!” He came between us, yelling. “Everyone is watching you two. What the hell is going on?”
Bystanders lingered outside the room, peeking in at the commotion. Turning back to Rika, I sucked at the cut in my cheek and spit the blood at her feet.
She launched for me again.
“Dammit!” Kai gripped me by the collar, pushing me back. He pointed his finger in my face, his teeth bared as he fixed me with a warning look.
Turning back to Rika, he tilted her head up, checking her bloody nose. “Are you okay?”
Is she okay? Your little princess threw the first punch, asshole.
“I’m fine.” She jerked her head out of his hands, challenging me. “I can take anything you got!”
“I’m sure! In both ends, I hear!”
She came for me again, but Kai pushed her back, turning to me. “What the fuck is the matter with you?”
“I don’t like her, and I don’t work for her, so I’ll do whatever I fucking want!” I gritted out.
“You’ll do what I want,” he whisper-yelled, getting in my face. “End of story.”
Looking around me, he spoke to the audience gathered. “Carry on, everyone. It’s over.” And to Rika, “Leave us alone, please.”
She didn’t move for a moment, still glaring at me and red from the exertion, and her ponytail hung on by a thread. But she finally walked past us, leaving the room.
I heard the voices slowly fade as everyone went about their business and left.
“What do you have against Rika?” Kai questioned. “You haven’t spoken to her once or barely spared her a glance. What is it?”
Taking my cuff, I wiped the blood off my mouth, not answering him.
“Are you jealous?”
I cast him a ‘fuck you’ look and went back to staring at the mirror behind him.
I could feel his eyes on me, eating away the small distance between us and wrapping around my body like a cage.
“What did you mean about ‘in both ends’?”
“You know what I meant.”
Their little threesome in the steam room. Kai took the front. Michael got the back. How many times had it happened after that?
“You heard about Rika and me?” His voice was low. “About the steam room?”
Who hadn’t heard? They were seen, it was all over the club, and it was no secret how he felt about her. It was there every time he looked at her.
“I—”
“No.” I cut him off. “I’ve had my fill of your stories, and I couldn’t care less—”
“Shh, shh, shh…” He pressed his finger to my lips, shaking his head at me. “Let’s not do this here, okay? We need to talk about it but somewhere we can really talk.”
And his gaze turned dark, telling me there was another meaning to his words.
Really talk? Where?
Dropping his hand, he walked around me, leaving the room.
“What do you mean?” I barked after him.
“You’ll find out,” he threw over his shoulder and then disappeared.
