Sleeping in with a hangover never worked for me. The sun had just crossed over the horizon right as I cracked my eyes open. Immediately, I tried to take in more of my surroundings. My body verged on being smothered with heat because another body was wrapped tightly around mine.
My back to his front, he spooned me with his large arm curled around my waist and his leg even enveloped my thigh. I turned my head over so slowly to take in the tanned skin of his bicep. Licking my lips and squirming a bit under the blankets, I reveled in each muscle before I inched my gaze up to his face.
Terrible man he was, his smile and eyes were as bright as the stupid sun.
I groaned and tried to roll away, knowing his chipper attitude would grate all the wrong hungover nerves.
He gripped my hipbone to stop me from moving from his side. “The moment you sit up to get out of this bed, that headache is going to hit you like a semi-truck.”
Part of me wanted to jump up and fake completely good health. My stomach and brain wrenched in pain at the idea though. “I have to get up sooner or later, Jax.”
“Sure. Just wait a minute.” He pulled me close and ran his hand up my bare hip. I looked down and saw that I was wearing only a baggy shirt of his. His hand roamed around under it while he nestled into my neck from behind. “You smell like me.”
I huffed, knowing I probably smelled like booze.
And other things.
“Oh, God,” I mumbled and winced. He ran circles on my ribs like he did my thigh and some of the embarrassment melted away before I asked quietly, “Did I vomit in your car?”
He chuckled, slid his hand down to my butt and smacked it lightly before he rolled away from me and got out of bed. “You just missed. Of course, you got some on your top and in your hair.”
I looked at my hair, confused.
“Baby, I washed you up before we went to bed.”
Warmth spread through me. So much so, I contemplated how it would look if I succumbed to spreading my legs for him that very minute. “You took care of me after how we acted in the club last night?”
“Yeah,” he answered with a sort of confused look on his face. Then, his chin tipped down. “And I always will no matter how we act anywhere.”
I swallowed and pushed the blankets off me. The room was heating up, and I had to get out of here to clear my head. To figure things out.
I froze when I felt his eyes tearing up my skin, making invisible marks like he wanted to devour every inch of me.
“If I could, Whitfield, I’d tattoo my name on every inch of your skin.”
I gulped and slowly got up, knowing the headache I had was about to get worse. When I stood, I grabbed the nightstand and winced. “It’s probably more like an airplane hitting me, a big one. Not a semi-truck.’
He grabbed some water and Advil for me.
‘Now,’—he said as I hydrated by emptying the whole glass—“we run.’
‘Oh, no.’ I started to back away but he grabbed my elbow and pulled me toward his closet.
‘Oh, yes. We have breakfast with my brother in an hour or two and you have to shake some of this hangover.’
I glared at his back while he went through a massive closet where everything seemed lit perfectly and organized conveniently. When he pulled out running shoes and work out clothing my size, I glared harder. “I’m not wearing some other women’s workout clothes.” He smirked, and I said, “Are those Isabel’s? Because they won’t even fit me.”
He grunted away my pettiness and shoved the clothes into my chest. “They’re your clothes.”
“I never left any here.”
“I had some brought here this morning.”
“Who would … how?” I asked.
“Money,” he responded.
“How convenient.” I didn’t mean to drag out the word but it just rolled off my tongue that way.
He ran his hand through his hair and sighed. “I shouldn’t have brought Isabel last night. I did it to rile you and ended up riling everyone.”
I narrowed my eyes at his confession because Jax never really admitted to being wrong. I snatched the clothes from him, waiting a couple beats.
“You did say this was casual though.”
“Hmm. There it is. Your reasoning.”
Instead of responding, he started to strip in front of me. I’m not proud to say I stared for a little too long.
He caught me and grumbled, “Put on the damn clothes before I decide to take advantage of you in my shirt instead, Whitfield.”
I looked down, somewhat appalled. “You’re kidding, right? This is the worst look ever.”
“You’re in my clothes.” He took a step closer. “You smell like me.”
I clung to the clothes he’d pushed into my chest as he moved in enough that I had to crank my neck to look up at him.
“And I bathed you last night.” He wrapped his arm around my waist so we were close enough that I could feel his excitement. It was long and hard enough that my body, although hungover, shivered at his touch.
Embarrassment swept swiftly through me. I looked down at my hands gripping the clothes. “Can we never talk about that again?”
“Oh, we’re talking about that night again.”
I succumbed to the need to roll my eyes even if it was rude. “I don’t see why. It was terrible.” I pulled away from him. “Can you turn around or leave the closet?”
He smiled at me like I was an idiot. “Why?”
“You know why! I need to change.”
He scoffed. “I’m not turning around or leaving. I’ve never let you hide from me. I’m not starting that shit now.”
My foot itched to stomp. “Jax, I was an embarrassment last night. I need some privacy to get myself looking presentable again.”
This time he snorted. “You always look too damn presentable, if we’re being honest here. And the privacy you can expect to get from this point forward with me is zero.”
I wanted to throw the clothes in his face but figured it wasn’t worth the battle. I ripped off the shirt quickly and I pulled on the panties and sports bra that somehow fit perfectly. Then yanked up the black yoga capris. I threw the workout shirt at him for good measure and said, “I don’t need that.”
His laugh boomed around the closet and echoed its way into my heart. “All right. Suit yourself,” he replied as he pulled on a long sleeve shirt. We both put on shoes and moved together like we were made to do just that.
He looked so happy here with me that I thought somehow, some way, maybe we could work.
That scared my heart into making my mind not think for the first part of our run. I pushed myself hard to keep up with him but halfway through I grabbed his arm to stop him and bent over.
I didn’t have to say anything when I vomited into a nearby trash can.
I groaned before going to push my hair out of my face only to find Jax already held it out of the way.
I glanced his way and mumbled, “Thanks.”
He nodded. “Happy our runs are starting to have a pattern of you purging your mistakes from the night before.”
I shoved a little at his chest and took in the park we’d run through. The morning was cooler than I’d anticipated as I walked ahead of him.
He moved in right behind me, rubbing up and down my arms. “You’re cold now, aren’t you?”
I hated that he was right. I should have worn that dumb shirt. I wasn’t admitting a thing though.
I shrugged and kept walking. When I turned to find the culprit of the rustling behind me, I saw Jax in glistening glory without a T-shirt on. His abs were more defined every time I looked at them, and the sweat exaggerated the V that dove into his pants.
Suddenly, he shoved the shirt over my head.
“Oh my God, Jax. I can put on a shirt.”
“Might be true, but I’ll maul you in the park if you keep looking at me like that.”
My laugh burst out around us, and I found my heart absorbing that echo so much that it couldn’t silence any thoughts anymore.
“I wanted to be casual with you because I figured that was all I could handle,” I blurted out.
He eyed me with surprise.
“I’m trying to be open and honest. I found out not too long ago that my mom wasn’t always open about important things. Finding that out now has me realizing I need to be better about not repeating the same mistake.”
I waited for his response while the wind rustled around us and the sun spilled through some of the leaves. One little sparrow hopped across the pavement in front of us and I focused on how it pecked at the ground for just a little food.
He nodded. “It’s something we both need to do. We can’t forget. Whatever force there is between us, it’ll destroy the fucking world, Whitfield, before it lets us forget about it or be casual.” His words rumbled out of him. “We’re inevitable.”
Inevitable.
He’d said it before in describing us. And so had I.
Inevitable.
It used to scare me with its finality. It used to be the end for me.
Inevitable.
Now it seemed solid, concrete, reliable. It signaled an end but also a beginning.
“I guess I agree, even if that means overcoming all of our history and the baggage we’re carrying with it,” I replied.
He stopped walking and turned me to face him. “You mean that?”
I cleared my throat and looked down at my hands. “Whatever we are, even if it’s a casual thing, I don’t want you being casual with anyone else. That force you talk about, it will destroy whoever you’re casual with in the future if it’s not me.”
His eyes twinkled. “If another man calls you ‘little dancer’ or touches you the way Bastian did in front of me again, Whitfield, there won’t be any force needed for me to dismember him slowly and deliberately.”
We finished our run and I got ready with Jax doing work I didn’t care enough about to listen to. Every step I took in his home lifted me up until I was walking on clouds.
We had issues bigger than mountains, but being high up in those clouds, I thought we could overcome them.
