I’d never seen Alex so relaxed as he sat on the couch with Rain on his lap. Well, that wasn’t exactly true. I’d never seen him so relaxed when sex wasn’t involved would be more accurate. He looked at home, and the softness in his features tugged at something deep inside me.
I barely paid attention to the show and reminded myself that while Alex might feel like mine, he wasn’t.
I knew he didn’t hate me anymore. I’d go as far as to say he really liked me, but I still couldn’t get a read on how much. That alone was fucking with me because I prided myself on my ability to read people.
But Alex was different. I was in love with him and had been for a while. He was everything. The only person who’d ever broken through my defenses and made me want more. And with him, I didn’t just want more. I wanted everything.
“Mommy!”
I jumped at Rain’s excited cry.
Mom came into the living room. “Hi, sweetie.” She came around the table and bent to kiss my head like I was four years old. “Happy birthday, baby.”
“Thanks, Mom.” I motioned to Alex. “This is Alex.”
“Hi.” Mom smiled warmly at him. “I’m Cassie.”
“Hi,” he said shyly.
“Alex and I sang happy birthday to Kai, and he liked my birdhouse.” Rain grinned up at Mom, her head still on Alex’s shoulder. “And we had cupcakes with lots of icing for dessert.”
“Sounds like a great night.”
“It was.” She sighed happily.
“Time to go, sweetheart. You have school in the morning.”
“I know.” Rain pouted.
“Say your goodbyes, then go put your stuff on so we can head home.”
“’Kay.” She twisted in Alex’s lap and wrapped her arms around his neck. “Bye, Alex.”
“Bye. Have a good night.”
“I will.” She hopped off his lap and launched herself at me. “Happy birthday, Kai.”
“Thanks, pumpkin.” I hugged her back. “Did you put your library book in your bag?”
Her face screwed up in an adorable look of concentration. “I don’t remember.”
“Go check, then get dressed.”
“Okay.” She bounded away.
“It’s nice to finally meet you,” Mom said to Alex and perched on the edge of the coffee table.
“Oh, um. You too.” He shot me a surprised look.
“I bet you’re glad that presentation is over. Kai was stressed about it for weeks.”
“Yeah. It’s nice not to have to worry about that anymore.” His eyes dimmed just the slightest bit. “But I think we did well.”
“We rocked it.” I squeezed his thigh. “I’d give us an A+.”
“I’m ready!” Rain bellowed from the hall.
“I’d better go.” Mom stood. “Have a good night, Alex.”
“You too.”
I followed Mom into the hall.
“You said he doesn’t have any family around here?” Mom said as she zipped up Rain’s coat.
“No. He’s from Vermont.”
“Wow, that’s far away. Is he going home for the holiday?”
“I don’t think so.”
“You should invite him over for dinner.”
“Yeah?”
She gave me a pointed look and leaned closer so Rain wouldn’t hear. “He’s the first person you’ve introduced me to. If he’s important to you, he’s important to me.”
She knew I was into both guys and girls and hadn’t even blinked when I’d told her. I was lucky to have such a supportive mother.
“I’ll ask him.”
She wrapped me up in a big mom hug and squeezed me tight. “I love you.”
“Love you too.”
“Happy birthday.” She kissed my cheek and stepped back.
“Happy birthday.” Rain held up her arms for a hug.
“Thanks.” I picked her up and gave her a squeeze.
“Love you.” She smacked a kiss against my cheek.
“Love you too.”
I closed the door behind them, then turned. Alex was standing in the doorway to the living room.
“You okay?” I walked over to him and stopped when I was right in his space and he had to look up at me.
“Yeah. It’s just… nothing.”
“What?” I asked softly.
“It’s nothing.”
I wanted him to tell me but didn’t pry. I’d learned that Alex opened up better when he was the one who started the conversation.
“It’s nice you have that. My parents weren’t really around, so I didn’t get the hugs and the ‘I love yous’ growing up.”
I wrapped one arm around him and tugged him into a loose hug, giving him the option of pulling away.
He melted against me with a sigh.
The more he revealed about his life, the more his issues made sense. He’d been abandoned by the people who were supposed to love him more than anything. Then he’d been betrayed by his asshole ex, and a slew of other people had let him down.
At that moment, I didn’t give a fuck that we weren’t really anything to each other, and I made a promise to myself I’d never be one of those assholes.
Even if we stopped sleeping together, I would still be his friend. Not only could we both use a few more of those in our lives, but I was also way too attached to ever walk away. I’d be there for him for as long as he’d let me.
“Happy birthday.” He kissed my neck. “I forgot to say it earlier.”
“Thank you.” I hugged him tighter.
“I didn’t get you a gift.”
“Yeah, you did.” I kissed his hair. “You’re my gift.”
“I am?” he asked playfully.
We pulled apart. I was taken aback at how beautiful he was. His eyes were bright and filled with happiness, and his smile was genuine and real.
“You are. Want to do something a bit different?” I kissed his full mouth.
“What did you have in mind?”
“Let’s go into my room.”
He took my offered hand and followed me down the hall.
I paused in the doorway. “I want you naked and spread out on my bed by the time I come back.”
“Okay.” He squeezed my hand, his voice breathless.
“Three minutes.”
“Count fast.” He pecked a kiss against my cheek, then sauntered into my room, a swing in his hips, and tugged his shirt off.
I closed the door and tried to get my libido in check. And get the package that had been delivered that morning.
When I had the box, I glanced at my phone to check the time. Two and a half more minutes.
Sighing, I opened Instagram for the first time in months. I scrolled for about ten seconds, already bored out of my mind.
I didn’t get the appeal of social media, and while I had accounts on every platform, I hardly ever used them.
Tapping on the DM icon, I checked to see if any of the new ones I’d gotten were important. Most were from people I’d grown up with, and a few were people I didn’t recognize but were most likely from school.
Alex’s name caught my eye, and I opened the thread. He’d sent a picture of him in my bed. The photo was relatively tame, just a close-up of his flushed and gorgeous face as he lay nestled against my pillows.
I stared at it. He looked good in my bed. Like he belonged. I saved the picture, then set it as my home screen.
Tucking my phone away, I headed back to my room.
“Look. At. You.” I closed the door behind me.
Alex lay on my bed, wearing nothing but a sexy-as-fuck smile, his cock half-hard and his body relaxed.
He reached under him and pulled out a ribbon that had been tied into a bow. He placed it over his belly button. “Happy birthday.”
“Fuck, baby.” I tossed the box onto the bed and stripped off my shirt. “I had plans to tease the fuck out of you until you begged me to let you come, but we might have to save that for round two.” I kicked off my shoes, then tugged off my socks.
He pulled in a shaky breath and ran his teeth over his bottom lip. I shucked off my pants and underwear. “I’m good with that.” He pushed up on his elbows. “What’s in the box?”
“Just a little something I ordered for my birthday.” I pulled one of the items out. “What do you think of this?”
He took the package and looked at the label. His eyes darkened as he handed it back to me. “I say we need to open that.”
“Good answer.” I put it on the bed and grabbed the other item I’d ordered.
“A headband?”
“Sort of. It has headphones built into it.”
“I don’t get it.”
“It’s for sensory deprivation. It doubles as a blindfold. Add in some white noise, and I thought it might help you relax.”
“Yeah. We can try that.” He lay back on the bed. “Now come claim your birthday present, Mr. Alexander.”
“Oh, I plan to.”
It took a few moments to connect the headphones to my phone. I checked the battery, then set it to play a loop of white noise. When it was ready, I handed it to him. “Adjust the sound so it’s loud enough you can’t hear what’s going on.”
He pushed the buttons, then settled back on the bed. He put it on but didn’t pull it over his eyes, which were bright with anticipation and lust.
I put my phone and the box away and quickly unwrapped the harness I’d bought. It was simple, just a single strap with two loops on the ends and a reinforced pad in the center.
Kneeling over him, I gently placed the pad behind his neck, then lifted one leg so I could wrap the loop around his thigh, right under his knee. He lifted the other knee, and I did the same to it. I slid a pillow under his ass to help with the angles.
I sat back and admired him. The strap looked good on him. It held his legs open while the neck pad forced his head up.
“Can you tie up my hands too?” he asked.
I nodded and grabbed the bow he’d brought. I had handcuffs and fabric wrist cuffs in my closet, but I liked the idea of trying a ribbon.
Alex held his wrists together so I could bind them. I lay over him and pinned his hands above his head. He stared up at me, his expression hungry.
I really had planned on edging the fuck out of him, but I was too close, too desperate. I pressed a kiss against his lips and let go of his hands.
I’d meant for it to be a quick kiss, but Alex immediately opened for me and sucked on my tongue. Fuck.
Giving up all pretenses of teasing, I ground my cock against his and kissed him back. Our mouths moved together, the kiss hot and heavy, more a mashing of lips and teeth and tongues than anything soft or sweet.
Needing air, I finally broke the kiss and sat back on my knees, breathing hard. Alex lay on the bed, his chest heaving as he stared at me in wonder.
Gently, I tugged the headband down so it covered his eyes. The moan he let out went straight to my dick.
I lifted it off his ear so he could hear me. “No safe words tonight. Tell me if it’s too much or if you need to stop.”
He nodded.
“Say the words. Let me know you understand.”
“No safe words. Tell you if I want you to stop.”
I replaced the headband, then took a moment to admire him. He was beautiful.
The amount of trust he was showing to not only let me have complete control over him but also to deprive him of most of his senses meant more to me than the fact that we were about to fuck.
Shaking off the wave of affection spreading through me, I grabbed the lube off the bedside table and slicked up my fingers.
Alex was hard and leaking, his breathing fast and his body tense. Hoping to help him relax, I ran my other hand over his chest, teasing his skin and getting him used to being touched while his other senses were cut off.
He sighed heavily and went boneless, the strap keeping him in place. I gripped his cock by the base.
“Fuck,” he whispered.
I stroked my hand up his length, then gently pressed one finger against his hole.
The constant stream of moans and sighs he let out as I slowly worked one, then two fingers inside him was so fucking hot. I loved that he wasn’t afraid to be vocal.
Working in tandem, I stroked his dick and fingered him, getting him nice and open for me.
“Kai,” he pleaded, his voice a little too loud in the quiet room.
I paused my teasing.
“Please,” he whispered.
Slowly, I pulled my fingers out of him and wiped them on the comforter. He looked so damn hot, all laid out for me, his hole wet and shiny.
I grabbed a condom and ripped it open. Using one hand, I suited up, then slicked it up with a generous amount of lube. When I was ready, I spread my legs to lower myself and lined my cockhead up with his waiting hole.
Slowly, I pushed in, pausing when half my length was buried in him.
“Fuuuuuuuck.” He clenched around me.
Moving as slowly as I could, I pushed the rest of the way in.
“Kai, fuck. So good.” He bit his lip and arched his back, forcing me even deeper.
Drawing in a deep breath, I pulled out, then pushed back in. I kept my pace as slow as I could, moving fluidly as I fucked him.
His cock was so hard it nearly touched his stomach. His chest and neck were flushed red, and little pink spots dotted his cheeks.
I gripped his hips, holding him in place, and drank him in. He was beautiful, goddamn beautiful.
And I didn’t just mean his looks. Yes, he was gorgeous, but seeing him like this, all spread out and relaxed as he trusted me with his pleasure, was everything. He was everything.
“Kai, more. Need more.”
I changed my angle so my cockhead dragged over his prostate with each thrust.
“Fuck. More!” He arched into me, trying to push back on my cock. “Please, Kai.”
I let go of his hips so our only point of contact was my cock sliding into his perfect ass and moved just the slightest bit faster.
He moaned and wiggled, the sounds growing desperate. I kept my pace steady. He lifted his bound hands. I stopped, my cock half-buried in him. He dropped his hands back on the bed.
I gave him a few loose strokes as a reward, then resumed my agonizingly slow pace.
Alex wasn’t the only one affected. I was already right there, my release hovering right under the surface.
“Need you,” he begged.
I ran one hand down his stomach, hoping to soothe him. Had he lost focus? Or maybe he was overstimulated? I didn’t want him to slip out of his happy place. I moved faster but not harder.
“Yes, that’s it. So good.” He clenched around me.
Stars exploded in front of my eyes. “Fuck,” I muttered.
I was too close to try and edge him, but I didn’t want to finish like this. Shifting, I lay over him, blanketing him with my body.
He moaned low and loud. I tugged his bound hands over my head so he could wrap his arms around my back. I wanted him completely surrounded when he came, and the selfish part of me wanted to feel as much of him against my skin as possible.
He held me tight, his body hot and hard and so damn perfect under mine.
I pressed a kiss against his lips, then sucked a hickey into his neck. This time, I didn’t hold back and I fucked him as hard and fast as I could.
“Fuck, yes. So good. Love your cock,” he babbled, his words slurring together.
I slid my arms under him and held him close, my body tight with desire as jolts of pleasure shot through me. I peppered his neck with openmouthed kisses, angling my body so my abs dragged over his cock.
“So good,” he sobbed. “I’m so close.”
“That’s it.” I knew he couldn’t hear me, but the possessive asshole in me needed to tell him exactly who he belonged to. “You feel so damn good. Like you were made for me.”
He cried out and arched his back.
“You’re mine, Alex.” I bit his shoulder right where it met his neck.
“Oh!”
Alex shook and shuddered, coming hard beneath me. Wetness pooled between us. I kept fucking him through his release, my lips on his neck and my mind in the stratosphere. My thrusts were wild and erratic, and Alex let out the sexiest little moans. I kept moving, not ready for it to end.
“Love this,” he murmured. “Love you.”
I came with a strangled cry. My orgasm hit like an anvil, slamming into me and stealing not only my breath but also my ability to think as I emptied deep inside him.
When my mind finally stopped spinning, I was lying on Alex, my soft dick still inside him. I slid one hand out from under him and gently tugged the headband off.
He blinked up at the ceiling.
“You okay? Am I crushing you?” I asked softly.
“You’re perfect,” he slurred. He was still deep in it.
I gently pulled out of him.
“I don’t like that.” He pouted adorably. “Want your cock all the time.”
“You can have it again soon, baby.” I kissed his lips. They were cold, and he was slow to respond.
“You’re okay, Alex. I’m just going to untie you. Can you stay still for me while I do that?”
“Yeah.” He sighed deeply. “I like being good for you.”
Carefully, I slid out from his grip, then knelt on the bed. He lay passively as I untied his wrists. I gently placed them on his chest. He wrapped them around himself, like he was trying to get warm.
“I’ve got you. I just need to undo your legs.”
“’Kay,” he said dreamily.
I undid the first loop and set his leg down. As the tension on the neck pad was released, his head flopped back. He giggled.
“You did so good for me, Alex.” I quickly undid the other side and laid his leg on the bed.
I pulled off the condom, tied it off, and tossed it into the trash, then lay next to him and gathered him in my arms. He came willingly, snuggling into my chest. His skin was cool to the touch, and I rolled onto my back so he was half on me.
“Do you need a blanket?” I kissed his neck.
“No, but I’m your blanket.” He giggled again.
I rubbed his back and chuckled.
He wiggled so he was over me, our bodies lined up. “You feel really good.”
“So do you, baby.”
I held him tight, whispering sweet nothings to him as his body regulated.
“Kai?”
“Yeah?” I lessened my hold on him so he could lift his head and look down at me.
“That was… I liked it.” His smile was shy and pushed all my buttons. Sassy Alex, shy Alex, happy Alex, even pissed-off Alex. I was here for all of him.
“You did?”
He nodded. “It was different. The white noise kept my head clear. And not being able to see you or having to worry about holding my position was freeing. Did you like it?”
“I did. I love when you trust me enough to let me take control like that.”
“So, was that a good birthday gift?” He grinned cheekily.
“Oh yeah.”
He pressed a soft kiss against my lips. “You owe me a round two. Just saying.”
“And you’ll get it.” I shifted our body weight and rolled him under me. “I just need a few minutes to recover. Fucking you is hard work.”
Laughing, he slapped my shoulder. “I’ll bet. I mean, it’s got to be tough to get it up again, seeing as you’re already at your quarter-life crisis.”
“Brat.” I slid my hands up his arms, then gripped his wrists. “Who are you calling old?”
“You.” His eyes shone with mischief. “And what are you going to do about it?”
He wiggled under me, and my spent cock twitched as his abs rubbed against it.
“You in a mood?” I asked.
“Maybe.”
“Stoplight method?”
He nodded.
“What’s your color?
“Green.”
“I’m not going to go easy on you,” I warned.
“Good.” He dragged his tongue over his bottom lip, staring intensely at me.
Adrenaline and need poured into my system, my body tense and ready for a fight.
“You want me? Come and take me.”
The roar that filled my ears drowned out every other sound, and my mind went blank. Alex grinned at me, the challenge in his eyes clear. Fuck yeah.
