It’s been almost four days since I’ve last seen Aspen and it’s been driving me wild. Since we have our regional championship games coming up soon, Coach has been having us practice almost every day, whether it’s on or off the ice. As much as I didn’t want to cancel any of my tutoring sessions with Aspen, I had no choice.
Hockey was the driving force behind the tutoring sessions anyway, so it wouldn’t make much sense if I would be the one causing myself to lose ice time just so I can see her. I could have made an effort, made some type of an attempt to see her on a different level, but I don’t know if I like the way things have been going.
What started out as a simple arrangement is becoming much more complicated than I would have ever imagined. We had a deal—no feelings involved. So why the fuck can’t I get this girl out of my head?
I refuse to admit the real reason, but it lingers in the back of my mind every day. Whenever my thoughts drift to her, I always wonder what she’s doing and what she would be doing if she were with me instead. I can’t help myself and I know I’m getting in far too deep. Eventually, I’m going to have to cut this shit off and it’s only going to be harder to let go the more we get involved with each other.
We had an early practice today, so I had told Aspen that I would still be able to meet her in the evening to go over some of our material from class. To be honest, I’m not sure I even need her help anymore. My grade has by far exceeded my expectations and even if I were to fail a few more exams, I think I would still be okay without her help.
But then that would mean I wouldn’t get to see her.
As I pull up to the campus after running home to shower, Aspen sends me a text, asking if I wanted to meet at her apartment instead. It turns out that they were rearranging some of the areas in the library tonight, so it was closed for any studying. Going to her place is the only option and the last thing I’m going to do is say no, even though I should.
Her apartment is a short drive away and it isn’t long before I’m pulling into a parking spot and heading inside the building. I hop onto the elevator and take it up to her floor. Pulling out my phone as I walk down the hall, I text her to let her know that I’m here.
As I reach the door, she’s already there, pulling it open as if she were waiting there for me. A smile touches my lips as my eyes scan over her. She’s dressed in a pair of sweatpants and a hoodie, her face free of any makeup and her raven-colored hair pulled up in a messy bun on top of her head.
“Hey,” she says softly, as she steps out of the way for me to enter. “Sorry about the library. I didn’t know about it until last minute and I meant to text you but I ended up taking a quick nap and didn’t remember until it was time for us to meet.”
“You don’t have to apologize,” I tell her, smiling down at her as she shuts the door behind me. “It’s not like it was that far of a drive. And this is the first time you’ve ever invited me over here.”
She shifts her weight nervously, reaching up to tighten her bun as she heads deeper into the apartment. “Well, I don’t know. It’s a pretty small place, so I didn’t really think you would want to come here.”
I follow her through the small kitchen that leads into an open-floor plan. Her apartment is a studio with the living room and bedroom combined. Even though it’s essentially all one room, it’s a larger space than she implied. Her bed is tucked over in its own little nook and the living room is practically separate with how much space is between the two areas.
“It’s not small,” I tell her, my voice gentle as we walk over to the couch. Aspen takes a seat and I sit down next to her, not bothering to move as my thigh brushes against hers. “Plus, I don’t give a shit what it looks like. You could live in a cardboard box and it would still feel like home.”
I watch as a pink tint spreads across her cheeks and she ducks her head for a moment, leaning forward to grab her book. I don’t know why I said the words, especially when I need to cut this rope that is threading itself between us. But it’s not a lie. Aspen has a way of making everywhere feel like home, as long as she’s there. Her presence alone does something to me and I can’t bring myself to put the feeling into words because that will only solidify what I’ve been trying to avoid.
I’m fucking falling for this girl and I can’t let myself go there.
“So, I don’t know what you really want to go over,” she admits honestly as she pulls her legs up onto the couch and sits cross-legged. “I know we don’t have any exams coming until next week and things have been pretty easy in class. Do you feel like you have a decent understanding of what we’ve been learning?”
Swallowing hard, I glance over at her as she stares at me expectantly. I can either tell her the truth, that I don’t need her help anymore, or I can lie just to keep her around. “I think I’m good with everything we’ve been learning,” I admit, choosing to go with honesty rather than lying.
Aspen narrows her eyes for a moment, but then her face relaxes as she tilts her head to the side. “If you didn’t want to study, then why did you still want to meet?”
Fuck. I should have known this would be her follow-up question, but I’m not sure that I’m fully prepared to answer it. I’m stuck in another position where I could either choose to lie or be honest. Aspen at least deserves the truth… even if it might hurt her in the end.
“Because I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you since last weekend,” I admit, my voice low and hoarse as I focus on the small golden specks in her irises. “I wanted to see you outside of class. Away from all the bullshit in life.”
She stares back at me with a heated gaze, her tongue slowly wetting her lips. “Like a distraction?”
The corners of my lips lift and I nod. “That’s what friends are for, right?”
A soft laugh escapes her as I enter her space, pushing her back down into the couch as I hover above her. Aspen’s lips part slightly, a ragged breath falling from her mouth as I stare down at her. She really is fucking breathtaking and that’s why I know I have to end this. This girl has situated herself too fucking deep and I need to extract her from my soul.
My face dips down to hers as I steal her breath, my mouth colliding with hers. Aspen wraps her arms around the back of my neck, her tongue sliding along mine as we deepen the kiss and I let her in. This has to be the last time and because of that, I’m going to worship her like she deserves before I rip her heart to shreds.
Pulling away, I trail my lips along the underside of her jaw and down the side of her neck. Her nails dig into my shoulders as I push her shirt up and move my mouth across her skin. Aspen’s legs fall to the sides, giving me full access as I make my way down her body. Sliding my fingers under the waistband of her sweats, I begin to pull them down as she lifts her head to look at me.
“What are you doing?” she questions me, her voice filled with panic as she involuntarily lifts her hips for me to slide down her pants and underwear.
A smirk plays on my lips and I look up at her as I peel her clothes from her body, leaving her exposed from the waist down. “I wanna make you feel good, baby. I want to taste that sweet pussy on my tongue.”
Aspen pulls her bottom lip in between her teeth, biting down as I drag my tongue along her pussy. A moan falls from her lips, her head tipping back as she lets herself fall back onto the couch. This is the first time we’ve been intimate in this way and it fucking pains me that this will be the last time I get to taste her pleasure.
Sliding my tongue along her, I take my time, tasting every inch before nipping at her clit. Aspen’s hands are in my hair, fisting my locks as I grip her thighs, holding her in place while devouring her. Her hips buck every time I press my tongue against her clit and I smile against her as I continue my slow assault, teasing her with every lick.
I work my mouth against her, swirling my tongue around her clit as she cries out. Her body shakes as I drive her closer and closer to the edge. She’s captivating and has me so fucking wrapped up in her, I can’t even think straight. All I can think about is Aspen and how badly I need her in my life right now.
But that’s somewhere I can’t allow myself to go. As badly as I want to, I can’t let her into my life any more than she already is. And the only way to make all of this stop is to erase her from my life completely. I just know this is going to fucking hurt, but I can’t focus on that right now.
The only thing I need to be focusing on is this moment—this moment with her that I never want to end.
Aspen is so close, her voice hoarse as she calls out. She wraps her fingers around my locks of hair, tugging on me as she fights against me to clamp her thighs around my head. Sliding my forearms against her legs, I pin her down and move my mouth against her, flicking her clit with my tongue over and over again.
Flattening my tongue, I press it against her, applying pressure as I pull one arm away from her leg and slowly slide my finger inside her. Aspen’s hips buck, her thigh pressing against the side of my head as I push her over the edge. She’s falling, fucking losing herself as she comes on my tongue. She sounds like an angel, calling out my name, and tastes like the heavens above.
Sliding my tongue along her, I lick her, tasting every last drop as she rides out her high. Her body shakes, her thighs clamped around my head, her fingers still wrapped up in my hair as she drifts into the abyss of ecstasy.
Pulling my finger from her wet pussy, I lift my head, peering up at her from between her legs. I slowly sit up and she lifts her head, her eyebrows drawing together as her eyes scan me.
“Why are you still dressed?” she questions me, tilting her head to the side.
“You want me naked, baby girl?” I ask her, rising to my feet with her eyes following me. “Why don’t you tell me what it is you want?”
A fire burns in her hooded gaze as she stares up at me. “I want you inside me, Cam. I want you to fuck me.”
A smirk forms on my lips as I reach behind my head and grab the collar of my shirt. Pulling it over my head, I toss it onto the floor before reaching for the waistband of my sweatpants. I shove them down my thighs, taking my boxers along with them before they fall to the floor, pooling around my feet. Stepping out of them, I bend down to grab a condom from my pocket and tear it open with my teeth.
Aspen’s eyes are on me, greedy as fuck as she drinks me in. Positioning myself between her legs, I slide the condom over my cock and press the tip against her pussy. Aspen’s hands claw at my back, urging me forward as I slowly push inside her.
A moan falls from her lips, her eyes rolling back in her head as I fill her to the brim with my cock. Dropping my hands onto the couch beside her head, I bring my lips down to her ear, nipping at her lobe. “I’m going to fuck you until my name is the only word you fucking remember,” I murmur, dragging my tongue along the outer shell of her ear.
Sliding one hand down to her ass, my fingertips dig into her flesh as I grip her in my palm. Thrusting my hips, I pound into her, fucking her harder and faster with every thrust. This wasn’t supposed to be a race, I was supposed to take my time and enjoy her, but fuck that.
Right now, all I want to feel is her coming around my cock as I lose myself deep inside her. The rest can come later, because I plan on fucking her all night long.
Aspen claws at my back, her fingernails digging into my skin as she runs them along my flesh. I pound into her harder and harder as she wraps her legs around my waist. My mouth collides with hers as a rush of warmth spreads across my stomach and through my body. I’m so fucking close and I can feel how she is, too, with the way her pussy grips my cock.
I steal the air from her lungs, breathing her in as I piston my hips. My balls constrict, drawing closer to my body as I feel my release right on the brink. I pound into her once more, swallowing her moans as she comes completely undone, shattering around me as her orgasm tears through her body.
That’s all it takes to send me soaring over the edge with her, free falling into the euphoric abyss. I’m completely consumed and so fucking lost in this girl, I don’t want to ever be found.
But I know this can only last for tonight…
And then I have to end things with her.
