The breaking period: Day 6, hour 8
John nudged my shoulder to get my attention.
We were sitting in the back of Ms. Gola’s classroom, except this time, it was the morning class with the commoners. At the blackboard, Ms. Gola droned on and on about how to follow directions during battle.
I used a fork I’d stolen from the dining hall to whittle my name into the desk.
After the break period / torture fest in the bathing room, Lothaire had made us run thirty miles around the island.
Ten miserable laps.
Then we’d trudged back into the fortress for class time.
A class where our unnaturally hot teacher’s boobs defied gravity as she wrote on the board. Was she jiggling like that on purpose? Probably.
It would have been iconic if she weren’t such a creep.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” John asked with concern for the fourteenth time in the last five minutes.
“Never better.”
“Seriously? Because you don’t seem okay.”
“Oh, I’m more than okay. I’m fucking fantastic.”
“That feels like sarcasm.”
“Feels like you should shut up.”
“Someone is a little touchy after the bathhouse incident.” John held up his hands at my glare. “Which is totally understandable. I just think we should talk about it. You know, for mental health and general group dynamics.”
“What is there to discuss?”
“Well, I mean it seemed very traumatic. I tried to stop them, you know, but they knocked me out.” John gave me puppy dog eyes and flashed his dimples. “So just tell me about your emotions. Lyla says it’s helpful to talk things out.”
“John.”
“Aran.”
I stabbed my fork into the desk. “If I asked you to commit a murder, would you help me?”
“This feels like a trap.”
“If I asked you to disembowel someone while I bludgeoned them to death with my knuckles, would you do it?”
“Um. I think it depends on who it is and why we are doing it.”
“John. Answer the question. Yes or no.”
“Well, I really think there are a lot of factors that—”
“Yes or no. Don’t think. Tell me right now what answer pops into your mind.”
“Yes. Fine. Fuck. Yes, I’d help you.”
I stopped twirling my pipe with my tongue and stared at the friend I’d only known for a couple of days. “Are you serious?”
John slumped forward. “Well you’re my friend, right? So yeah, if you wanted me to kill them, I’d do it. That’s what friends do.” His dark eyes were wide and sincere.
Holy sun god.
He wasn’t joking.
Damn. I really liked this human.
I glanced across the room. “There’s a 99 percent chance in the future that I’m going to take you up on that offer. That is how I’m feeling.”
John followed my line of sight and whispered, “Which one are we taking out?”
“All of them.”
John choked on air. “All? Even Orion?”
I nodded because I didn’t trust myself to speak. Inhaling enchanted smoke, I focused on the slight burning sensation in my lungs.
If I opened my lips, I’d scream.
“Are we strong enough to take them out?” John asked with disbelief as he sized up the three massive warriors who were built more like statues of gods than flesh-and-blood men.
“We are.”
I thought about the surety in my bones when I’d murdered my mother. When I’d stabbed my blades into the two shifters in the beast realm and they disintegrated into dust.
It was unfathomable power.
“Shit. I didn’t realize you were built like that,” John said as he sized me up with awe. “You know, for a weirdly pretty man, I get the vibe you’re a scary motherfucker.”
I grunted.
He had no idea.
There were people who did bad things because they had no choice and there were no other options. These were the accidents that they always regretted. The deeds that haunted them.
Then there were people like me.
I’d committed war crimes when there wasn’t even a war.
And I’d do it again.
And again.
John nudged my shoulder. “I know you’re still mad, which you have every right to be, but just so you know, this isn’t like them. Sure, when I was the new guy, Malum let go of me in the dark sea, and I had to swim for hours until I got back to the shoreline.”
The fork creaked in my hand.
Just another reason to kill the fae bastard.
I pulled the fork back to throw it across the room and hopefully take out an eyeball, but John grabbed my hand and tried to wrestle it away.
We grunted and fought silently.
“But.” John held the fork out of my grasp and whispered aggressively, “Listen to me. They’re not acting like themselves. Everyone knows they’re devoted to Orion, like crazy, burn-the world-for-you, kill-everyone, if-you-touch-him-you-die devoted.”
Great, Orion was living my fantasy.
Life wasn’t fucking fair.
But it would be. After I murdered them all and found my man. Singular.
Just one handsome-as-sin man who would raze the world for me but still have a sensitive side.
He’d enjoy long days of shopping and trying on clothes, getting ready for parties with me, dancing drunk, and smoking. We’d sleep in and wrestle in bed.
I sighed.
“Um, Aran, are you listening to me?”
“What?” I shook my head to clear the fantasy that was never coming true.
I groaned and buried my hands in my messy blue curls.
John grabbed my arm. “Listen. I’m trying to tell you something important. Orion has a feminine beauty about him, right? Who else do we know that’s like that?”
“I don’t know?”
I squeezed my eyes shut and thought about it. “A good-looking horse? The rumored god of sex? I don’t know what you want me to say. Yeah, I like chocolate. It’s fucking tasty.”
There was a long moment where John stared down at me like I’d lost my mind.
I had.
But it was rude to stare.
“You are pretty, you idiot!” he yelled but lowered his voice when students turned around. “They call you pretty boy. But they’re crazy devoted to Orion and have never touched another man because of that. I think they’re into you and they don’t know what to do. They all see you as a threat to their dynamic.”
Enchanted smoke turned to ashes in my mouth. “Bullshit.”
There was a whooshing sensation in my stomach.
Realistically. I do want to kiss Orion.
John nodded with excitement like he’d figured something out.
“Malum and Scorpius are probably freaking the fuck out because they’re into you and they shouldn’t be. They probably feel like they’re cheating on Orion, so you’re now the enemy. And Orion probably hates you because he thinks you’ll take his men.”
I gaped at John.
My jaw opened and closed as enchanted smoke streamed from my lips.
“But I want Orion, not them.”
John fell back in his chair. “You did not just say that.”
Shit.
You are not into massive fae psychopaths. Even if they do have bee-stung lips and warm eyes with long lashes.
Cut it out, bitch!
John put his fist into his mouth and silently screamed.
“This is bad.” He vibrated in his seat. “This is really fucking bad. You’re dead. My new friend is dead.” He rocked back and forth violently. “Why can’t I just have one thing at this place? Fuck my life.”
I smacked his arm. “Stop it! I’m not going to do anything about it. Seriously, I don’t actually want him. I was just saying if I had to choose among the three monsters, I’d choose him.”
John rocked harder in his chair, and more people looked over at the commotion.
“John, listen to me.” I gritted my teeth and smacked him harder. “I can never be in a relationship. Ever. So don’t make a big deal out of this. I’m going to be alone for the rest of my miserable immortal life. Okay?”
John stopped rocking.
“Okay?” I whispered more aggressively.
He stopped panicking, and a weird expression crossed his face.
It was pity.
“No, you won’t be alone,” John said with vehemence. “I know fae are weird about love, but you can be with whoever you want to be.”
John grabbed my shoulders and squeezed. “The rest of the realms don’t put labels or constraints on love. If you want five men, Aran, you can have five men. If you want one, you can have one. There are species that don’t even bother to label themselves as anything other than sentient creatures. Don’t ever limit who you can be because of rules made by dusty prudes.”
Warmth blossomed.
I couldn’t help but flash a toothy grin. “You’re a good person and an even better friend.”
“Thanks, mate.” John smiled and smacked me across the back with all his strength.
I swallowed a scream.
Through gritted teeth, I clarified, “But that’s not what I’m talking about. My issues are much bigger than petty prejudices. I agree the fae are fucking dumb. Trust me, I hate them more than anyone else.”
Elite fae asking to breed me.
“WHORE” carved across my back.
Enchanted to burn when I was turned on to ensure I never lost my virginity. I couldn’t even imagine how painful it would get if I ever tried anything sexual.
So many problems.
And the biggest one was currently tipping back his chair with an arrogant smirk.
Ms. Gola leaned over Malum’s desk and flashed impressive cleavage as she handed back our essays from last week.
How is her dress work appropriate?
But she wasn’t the only person fiending over my enemies.
Half the women in the classroom, and a few men, kept sneaking glances at the kings. A familiar commoner student with dark hair turned around and winked aggressively at Orion as she crossed stiletto-clad feet seductively.
It was the same girl the kings had thrown out after she’d had sex with Orion.
“Turn around, Sari,” Ms. Gola snapped at the pretty girl.
Really, the teacher was jealous of someone looking at the kings? This was getting ridiculous.
Even if the girl had gotten to feel Orion’s lean golden body against her.
My stomach pinched uncomfortably.
No! You’re not jealous of Sari. You’re a dude. Act like one.
I pretended to adjust my sweatpants like I had a penis, but it didn’t relieve my discomfort.
Sari ignored Ms. Gola and kept making moon eyes at all the kings. Not just Orion.
Apparently her brain cells had stopped working.
They’d thrown her out of the room like a dog.
And if she knew what they’d said about women, she wouldn’t be smiling at them.
A sudden chill racked through me, and I ignored the kings.
I sucked in smoke.
My clothes were soaked with sweat, the handiwork of the brutal mile pace we’d kept during the morning run, and it had dried on my skin.
I itched aggressively at my blue curls and wished they would stop clinging to my face.
Once again, I was cold and miserable.
John twirled the fork he’d confiscated from me between his fingers. I resumed scratching my name into the desk with my fingernail. While passing out papers, Ms. Gola demonstrated how to dodge a sword by aggressively hip thrusting into the air.
Okay.
She thrust with all her might.
She has to be doing it on purpose.
A headache throbbed behind my eyes.
Sari turned around for the sixteenth time and winked at Malum suggestively.
I gagged.
Malum’s words echoed like a bullet.
“We only fuck them in the ass because they’re nothing but holes.”
Holes.
H-O-L-E-S.
That was my new least favorite word. It replaced whore at the top of the list.
I’d show him what a woman was good for when I used my mouth hole to bite off his face.
Jinx’s voice drawled in my mind, “Try to keep your cannibalistic tendencies at bay, Aran. It’s not becoming.”
I slammed my forehead against the top of my desk.
Horace turned around in the seat in front of me and stared at me with his creepy yellow eyes.
He didn’t blink.
“What do you want?” I groaned with half my face still smushed against the table.
Horace showed off twin fangs. “Is little Johnny boy annoying you? He has a tendency not to stay the fuck out of other people’s business.”
Little Johnny was probably 250 pounds of muscle.
John rolled his eyes. “Oh, please, Horace. You weren’t just fucking that girl; you were draining her dry. If I hadn’t stopped you, she’d be a corpse.”
Wonderful.
While I was being submerged, Horace had tried to kill the girl he was fucking.
What a nice place.
Not.
