I’m left alone in my room for a couple of hours after that, the new agency nurse is not able to arrive for a little while. It’s the first time I’ve spent in my own company for almost a month, and it’s nice not having eyes on me the whole time, watching my every move. Although the feeling of being observed doesn’t disappear completely and I glance around the room warily, wondering if there are hidden cameras in here. I wouldn’t put anything past Adrian at the moment, and just because I haven’t seen him yet, doesn’t mean that he’s not keeping tabs on me.
The plate of food that I arrived back to sits on the small table in front of the window, uneaten. I know it’s going against what Ash commanded; that I keep eating. But I just can’t force myself to, knowing that it’s more than likely drugged by my wankstain of an uncle, and may be harmful to my unborn child. I’m not sure how soon Ash will be able to make good on his promise and ensure that it’s not drugged, so for now, I’ll hold off as long as I can. My stomach grumbles, reminding me that I’ve not eaten since breakfast, so I take a sip of water from the glass that I’d filled up from the bathroom tap—I can’t trust the water given to me either.
What I can’t seem to work out is why he would go to such lengths to keep me placid, unaware, and compliant. It’s not as if I can escape from here anyway, being in the middle of bumfuck nowhere, and with my shit sense of direction I’d get lost or picked up even if I did try to run. And I don’t have any way to contact the guys. Well, I didn’t up until this point. Especially as I thought them to be a figment of my imagination.
The warmth that covered me when I was talking to my Knights fills me again, my entire being aching to be with them once more, to be ensconced in their arms, surrounded by their loving embrace. I burrow into the feeling, wrapping my blanket tighter around myself as I watch the rain of a sudden shower hit the window panes with a tinkling sound. The rain and birdsong are the only music I get to listen to now.
The sun begins to lower in the sky when I hear the lock of my door turning with a click, and I twist in my chair to see the door opening and a woman younger than Jacky but older than me step into the room, the door closing softly behind her. Her wheat blonde hair is in a neat ponytail, and her slight frame is covered by a pastel pink scrubs uniform. It’s her laughing brown eyes that give me pause, plus the tray that she’s holding in her hands.
“Hi, Lilly. I’m Mai and I’ve bought you something to eat,” she tells me, carefully stepping towards me, and placing the tray on the table while making sure not to knock the plate already there off. “I made it myself, and no one else has touched it,” she divulges, looking me straight in the eye with a frank and open look on her face. She knows about the drugs, right?
“T–thanks,” I reply, looking down to see a bowl of steaming soup. It looks like chicken and vegetable, and my stomach growls loud enough to be heard over the drizzle outside. Yum!
I hesitate for just a moment, unsure if she is someone my guys have sent or another of one of my uncle’s minions. She leans in closer, her light, floral perfume fresh rather than cloying.
“Ash told me to tell you ‘rubber duck’ if you had any concerns,” she whispers in my ear, my eyes widening at the phrase. Only Ash and I know about it, no one else. My pulse spikes thinking about when he was meant to use it, if he was feeling the urge to cut, and worry floods my veins at the thought that he may have self-harmed and I’ve not been there to help.
Worry about that later, Lilly. Just get through this first.
Not taking my eyes off the bowl—just in case someone is watching us—I take the spoon, dip it in, and bring it to my mouth. The soup is delicious, clearly homemade, and full of warm comforting flavour. There’s a bread roll to go with it, and before I realise it, the bowl is empty and I’m feeling full but clearheaded. A contrast to how I’ve felt after most meals I’ve had here.
“Thanks, that was amazing,” I say with a sigh, seeing the corner of her eyes crinkle with a wide smile. “Have we met? Your eyes remind me of someone.”
“The twins are my cousins, bloody reprobates,” she answers, laughing as she hands me a bottle of water, then sits in the chair opposite me. That makes sense; she has Roman’s eyes. “So, what do you usually do around here?” she asks me, another sigh leaving my lips as I play with the tassels on the blanket.
“Nothing really, mostly I sleep after eating,” I confess, seeing the laughter leave her eyes as her jaw clenches, and a flush stains her cheeks.
“Well, how about a game of Go Fish?” she finally questions, pulling out a pack of cards from her pocket, along with a chocolate bar which makes my mouth water. “Winner gets this,” she tells me, eyes alight with challenge.
“You’re on!” I tell her, beaming as she moves the trays to the floor next to us, then deals the cards. “But fair warning, I was a champion back in Primary school. I even won Sally Weston’s favourite, pink sparkly headband, which pissed her off no end.”
She lets out a peal of laughter, and suddenly the room feels brighter, the grey day less dismal as we begin to play.
I lie down, the sweet taste of victory still on my tongue as I savour the last cube of chocolate melting on my tongue. Mai left after dinner, telling me she’ll be back tomorrow at breakfast, and it feels so nice to finally have an ally here. Three if you count the twins, which I think that I can, considering Willow and the guys know them.
I shut my eyes, waiting for the familiar blackness of sleep to descend, but it eludes me tonight. Maybe it was the conversation with my guys earlier, their voices echoing inside my head like a shout in a cave. Even now I can hear them, and for the first time in weeks, it feels as though I’m close to them once more.
It’s the middle of the night, and the room is in complete darkness before I start to drift off, only to be startled awake when I hear the soft click of what sounds like the lock on my door. A shadow fills the doorway briefly before it’s closed again, the lock sounding once more. My heart thuds painfully in my chest, my body freezing up as the figure approaches the bed. It pauses briefly in front of me before moving towards the bottom of the bed, out of my line of sight.
My breathing becomes shallow when cool air hits my back as the duvet is lifted, the mattress dipping as the figure gets in behind me. Nausea swirls in my stomach when the heat of a body hits my spine through my nightgown, fingers digging into my hips painfully as a hardness is ground against my arse.
“Violet…” a deep, male voice groans, his painful grip loosening, then his palm glides down my thigh, fingers searching for my hem and leaving a sickening tingling in their wake. All whilst his hot, alcohol-scented breath washes over the back of my head, making me want to throw up.
Remember, Baby Girl, go in hard and fast, like you want to push through your attackers’ body.
Jax’s voice sounds in my head, as if he’s right in front of me, and before my brain has time to catch up, I’m throwing my head back with a yell. The satisfying sound of cartilage breaking sounds in the room, and warm liquid hits the back of my head, coating my hair.
“FUCK!” the male voice shouts, the heat of his body moving away from mine.
My head throbs, the dark room spinning as I struggle to sit up, my breaths laboured and sawing out of my chest.
“Lilly?! Everything okay?” a loud voice sounds from outside the door, the handle rattling.
“Rowan?” I croak, turning just as the dark shadow of a man flies across the room, pausing at the wall opposite the bed before disappearing through it. What the fuck?
“We’re coming in, Lilly,” Roman’s voice calls this time just as I hear the lock click, and the door swings open, hitting the wall with a crash. The room suddenly fills with light, and I squint at the harsh brightness, my hand flying up to shade my eyes as I manage to sit upright. “Fuck, why are you covered in blood?”
Both boys rush over to me, Rowan kneeling on the bed next to me to inspect the back of my head.
“Ow!” I hiss when he touches a particularly tender spot.
“Sorry, pixie girl,” he soothes, his fingers becoming a little more gentle. “It doesn’t look like you’re bleeding. What in the ever-loving fuck happened?”
“There was someone in my bed…” I shiver, tears filling my eyes and my cheeks reddening with shame at what I have to say next. “H–he was—he was touching me, so I headbutted him with the back of my head,” I tell them, feeling a drop of liquid hit my hands which are resting in my lap. “He called me Violet.”
“Motherfucker!” Roman curses, running his fingers through his shoulder-length hair. His all black outfit looks a little rumpled, but I guess it would be if he’s been on duty all day and into the night. “Where is he now?” he questions, looking around as if he’ll find him hiding under the bed.
“He disappeared through that wall,” I tell them, lifting my trembling hand and pointing to the spot opposite me. I can see a very faint outline in the wall, the right size for a door. Roman walks over to it, running his hands along the tiny gap.
“Servants’ door, all the old manors have them. Can’t have the help cluttering up the hallways. Fucking elitist pricks,” he mumbles as a small click sounds in the room, and a second later the door opens to reveal a dark passageway. “He definitely went this way,” he tells us, stepping to one side and shining the torch on his phone onto the floor, highlighting spots of red.
“Check it out, I’ll wait here,” Rowan says, getting off the bed and holding out a hand. “I’ll help get you sorted, Lilly.”
“Just because you’re four minutes older, doesn’t make you the fucking boss,” Roman grumbles, but does what Rowan says and heads into the gaping darkness, shutting the secret door behind him.
“Has anything like this happened before?” Rowan asks me, his voice laced with gentle concern as he helps me out of the bed, tucking my trembling hand into the crook of his elbow. My other hand strokes over the fading bruises on my hip.
“I–I think maybe, but I’ve been too out of it to know if it was just a dream or not,” I confess quietly, pausing when his steps stop. I look up to see that his jaw is clenched, his face hard. I swallow thickly, trying to find the courage to ask a question in return. “D–do you know who it was?”
His eyes close, a deep exhale leaving his mouth before he turns, facing me, his hand coming over mine and tucking it further into the crook of his arm.
“We’re not sure, but I wouldn’t be surprised if your uncle has a broken nose and two black eyes tomorrow.” His eyes soften, his hand squeezing mine gently.
“Adrian?” I whisper, but don’t hear if he replies as I tear from his grip, making it just in time to throw up in the toilet. I heave until there’s nothing left, stomach acid burning the back of my throat.
I hear the sound of Rowan talking to someone, but my mind is too full of what he just implied. My uncle has been stealing into my bedroom at night, touching me, sexually abusing me, whilst I was too drugged up by him to defend myself.
All of a sudden the walls feel like they’re closing in, my breaths coming in short, sharp pants as the weight of that knowledge sinks in.
“Hey, Princess,” a deep voice I vaguely recognise sounds as if from far away. “Look at me, Lilly,” the voice commands, and I turn my head, finding familiar grey eyes full of worry looking back at me. “That’s it, my love, good girl. Now breathe with me, in and out,” Ash orders, and it takes me a second to realise that he’s on a phone screen and not actually in the room. A wave of almost crippling sorrow hits me, but I do as he orders and follow his deep breathing until the edges of the room go back to their usual place.
“Ash?” I rasp, my throat raw and tears dripping down my cheeks as I wrap my arms around myself, still sitting on the bathroom floor in front of the toilet full of my own vomit. “H–he touched me, Ash.”
“I know, Princess, I know. And I will personally chop off each and every one of his fingers for daring to lay a hand on you,” he growls out as a deadly fire burns in his eyes, a fire that warms me enough to sit up straighter. “I wish we could come and get you right the fuck now but we can’t, Princess.” Frustration is clear in the way he says the last part through clenched teeth. “If my father even suspects…shit, he may order Adrian to kill you, and I just can’t live in a world that you are not a part of. That’s not an option, Princess.” His eyes beg me for my understanding, for my forgiveness.
“I–I know, Ash,” I reply softly, lowering my gaze as my throat constricts at the thought of spending one more second with the fucking pervert that is my uncle.
“Look at me, Princess,” Ash directs once more, voice hard, so I do as he says. “You will not have to face him again. One of the boys will be with you, day and night.”
“How can you make that happen?” I ask, mind swirling with the game that we’re playing, the tightrope that we’re walking.
“We’ll tell him that Julian has given us orders to,” Roman tells me, and I look away from Ash into his laughing brown eyes, which currently are full of evil humour. It also confirms my suspicions that Julian has something to do with this.
“He won’t question it if it’s my father’s orders,” Ash interjects, and I look back at him. “Because then he’ll have to admit what he’s been doing, and Julian won’t like that one bit.” His lip curls, and I shiver at his words. Not for the first time, I curse being a woman, curse the fact that these old men all want something from me that I am not willing to give them, so they will try and take it by force. “We won’t let Julian near you either, Princess. I swear.”
I gaze into his eyes, full of a fierce fire and love, and I nod, scrubbing my own eyes with my hand. “Okay,” I say, my voice a little scratchy but stronger than before.
“That’s my girl,” Ash tells me, pride making his eyes shine. “Now, Mai is on her way to help you get sorted, and the boys will be with you until she gets there.”
“I love you, Asher Vanderbilt,” I confess, beyond grateful for everything that he is doing for me.
“I love you, Lilly Vanderbilt,” he replies, voice soft. “I’ll see you soon, okay, Princess?”
“See you soon,” I respond, my heart dropping as he ends the call.
Somewhere, a clock chimes one in the morning.
Thirteen days. I’ll see him and the others in thirteen days.
All I need to do is survive until then.
