Unlike what I feared, Papa doesn’t say anything when I tell him about breaking off the engagement with Aiden.
He simply pats my back and tells me my happiness matters more than anything else. Besides, it’s not like Jonathan will stop backing him just because there’s no in-law relationship. Apparently, Papa can help him with a partnership with a duke’s family in return.
Jonathan hasn’t been as tolerant with Aiden, though. I think he’s taken him somewhere in China.
Mum is the same. She hasn’t been talking to me since she learnt the news.
She showed up here and started her usual fighting shows with Papa.
“You’re such a horrible influence, Sebastian. It’s because of you that Silver has no sense of responsibility.”
“Me?” He laughed with menace. “Do we really want to go down that lane, Cynthia? Because you’re the one who’s trying to make her a carbon copy of you, and not in the best way. If she doesn’t want to marry for money and status, she will not marry for money and status. I will not sell my own daughter like a whore the way you’re selling yourself to that Frenchman.”
Their fight just got more intense after that, it was like those divorce days all over again.
I squeezed Helen’s hand as we listened to them from outside Papa’s office. Helen was pale and I could tell she was uncomfortable, but she didn’t interfere or face Mum. If it were any other person, she would’ve kicked her out, and honestly, Mum would deserve it.
I apologised on her behalf to Helen and she stroked my cheek and told me it’s not my fault.
That was yesterday.
I haven’t heard a word from Mum since then. It’s the weekend, so I have no idea where she could be. Usually, she’d invent work, because unlike what she won’t admit, Mum is also a workaholic, just like Papa.
We’re supposed to spend time together, but she hasn’t returned my calls or texts. She’s not in her flat either and it’s freaking me out.
I plan to gather my thoughts and keep my promise to Cole — the part about not hiding anything from him again. I’ve been thinking of ways to tell him about the pregnancy because, like he did with Adam, I know he’ll take care of this. Or at least help me make the decision, since obviously I can’t do it.
A part of me is scared he’ll tell me to get rid of it.
What else should I expect? That he’ll suggest we leave the country or something?
Damn it, Silver. Stop being a naïve fool.
Cole has an early practice today because of a game in the evening, so I don’t have to look at his face and feel guilty that I’m hiding something from him.
Besides, Mum’s disappearance feels like a weight perching on my chest, looming over me like a demon.
I feel like that girl who walked in on her while she drowned in her own blood.
She hasn’t answered my calls in fifteen hours. She promised to never do that to me again.
I tap on Papa’s office door, balancing a tray of tea on my hand, and go inside. A forced smile grazes my lips as I serve Papa, Frederic, Derek, and the rest of their team.
“Thank you, Miss.” Derek smiles but quickly hides it.
I return it, then ask Papa, “Can I talk to you for a second?”
“Absolutely.” He nods at them before following me outside. We’re standing in front of his closed office door. “What is it, Princess?”
“Mum is missing.”
His jaw tightens. “She’s a grown woman, Silver. Stop worrying about her as if she’s a child.”
“Papa…”
“Why would you even want to talk to her after the show she put on yesterday?”
“You don’t understand. She can’t be left alone for too long.” I clink my nails against each other.
His expression morphs from anger to contemplation. “What do you mean?”
Mum will kill me if she finds out I told him, but she pushed me to this. I can’t take this pain anymore. I can’t keep it from Papa.
“Remember that time I went to spend the weekend with her and didn’t want to leave her side for a whole month?”
He nods. “I thought you felt guilty about leaving her alone.”
“I did. She cut her wrist, Papa.”
“She what?”
“She doesn’t want to show it, but she suffers in silence. The image you see, the debates and smiles and social media goddess titles are just her way to appear strong.”
“Princess.” He wraps an arm around my shoulder, appearing as shocked as I did back then. “You dealt with all of that on your own? Why haven’t you told me?”
“She wouldn’t let me. You know her; she’d rather die than show any type of weakness. During your divorce, she spoke high and mighty in front of the cameras, but she cried when she thought no one was there. She fought you every time she saw you, but she always worked on improving your plans for the party’s future when she was alone. It’s not that she doesn’t care, Papa, it’s that she doesn’t like to show it.” And I think I inherited that trait without even realising it.
“That loathsome habit of hers.” He sighs, stroking my back. “She’ll be okay. She loves you too much and would never leave you.”
“But she was so mad yesterday.” I sniffle. “What if she…what if…”
Papa’s brow furrows in concern. “She won’t.” Even as he speaks the words, he doesn’t seem to believe them. “She’ll stay, Princess. If not for anyone, then for you.”
“What do you mean?”
“You know, Cynthia was always the type who didn’t want children, because she thought they’d get in the way of her ambitions and her plans. I tricked her into it, sort of, and the moment she knew she was pregnant with you, she said she loved you without even seeing you. When we first met you, she cried and thanked me for changing her mind.” He smiles with nostalgia and shakes his head. “Then she said she’d kill me if I told anyone she cried. Point is, Princess, you gave her life and mine a deeper meaning. For that, we would never leave you, even though we left each other.”
My arms drape around his waist and I fight my own tears. “I love you, Papa.”
People say you can’t choose your own parents, and many wish they never had their parents. Not me. I hated the fights and the divorce and everything that came with it, but I wouldn’t change my parents for the world. Flaws and fights be damned.
My phone vibrates and I pull it out faster than I’ve ever done in all my life. It’s not Mum. It’s Lucien.
I called him earlier but only got his voicemail.
“Hey, Lucien.”
“Hello, Silver.” He has a charming French accent that I can listen to for days.
“Is Mum with you?” My heart beats loud as I wait for his answer.
“Yes, she is.”
Oh, thank God. “Can I talk to her?”
“I’m afraid not. She’s asleep.”
Oh. “Can I come over?”
After Mum introduced us, we usually had meals either in his place or at her flat. He’s a very private man and doesn’t like eating in restaurants. Since I met him, I’ve always thought he’d be the one who would get Mum out of her funk.
She enjoys his company and hasn’t been quick to break things off with him. I never actually felt more than friendship between them, and I thought that was enough for Mum’s state of mind.
“Yes, of course,” Lucien says. “But we’re not in London.”
“Not in London?”
“Yes, we’re taking some time off in my mansion in Nice.”
“You’re in France?”
“Exactement.”
Oh, Mum. Couldn’t she let me know about that little detail? Though she’ll probably call me back when she wakes up.
Or maybe she won’t.
I need to see her and make sure she’s fine.
“Can you send me the address?”
“I’ll do better than that.” There’s a smile in his voice. “I’ll send a driver and my private jet.”
“Thanks so much, Lucien.”
“Any time. How about you spend the weekend with us, yes?”
“Okay.”
After I hang up, I release a breath and realise Papa has been standing there the whole time. From the tightening of his features, he seems to have heard the entire conversation.
“See? She’s been with her lover while you were worrying about her. Cynthia will always be Cynthia. She’s only using your guilt against you.”
“Papa, how can you say that?”
“Do you mean to tell me she doesn’t?”
“Well, sometimes, but she really does suffer in silence.”
“Clearly. In France. During a romantic getaway.” He briefly shakes his head. “You don’t have to go.”
“I want to. I need to make sure she’s fine.”
He kisses my temple. “Call me when you get there.”
After Papa returns to his office, I quickly pack a bag. Lucien’s driver pulls in at our house’s entrance half an hour later.
Just when I’m about to climb in, Cole’s Jeep comes to a slow halt in front of the mansion. My heart flutters and I have to remind myself to breathe as he walks up to me, wearing black jeans that hang low on his hips and a grey T-shirt that stretches over his shoulders.
I was planning to text him once I was in the car, but I guess this is better.
“Where are you going?” He watches the Mercedes and the driver with a critical eye.
“To see Mum in France.”
He raises a brow. “Now you’re running away to France? You think I can’t follow?”
“She went with Lucien and I want to make sure she’s fine.” And not mad at me.
He watches me for a few unnerving seconds. The way he observes with that blank look on his face makes me feel as if he’s dug inside me and figured everything out.
Like he can see the baby and will now confront me about it.
“I’ll go with you,” he finally says.
“You’re coming with me?”
“If you’re not running away, you wouldn’t mind, right?”
“But…”
He pushes past me to the car and slides into the back seat. “Are you getting in?”
I join him, closing the door. “Shouldn’t you tell Helen?”
“She’s writing and won’t come out until tomorrow. I’ll call her then.”
“Don’t you have a game tonight?”
He shrugs.
Cole never skips practice, let alone games. The fact he’s willing to do that to be with me sends tiny butterflies to slash the bottom of my stomach.
As the car leaves the mansion, I allow my thoughts to creep in. Deep down, I’m happy he’s coming with me. I’ve been on trips before, but this is my first time with Cole.
The driver takes us straight to a special landing place where a plane is waiting for us.
“Wow. Lucien went all out. Maybe he wants to marry my mum.”
“I don’t think so,” Cole says as a beautiful flight attendant leads us to our seats.
“Why not? What’s wrong with my mum?” I snap.
He smiles. “Easy, Tiger. I don’t think they’re in that type of a relationship.”
“Why would you think that?”
“They only seem to be close friends.”
I clamp my lips shut, refusing to admit I also had that same thought.
The captain welcomes us, tells us the flight will last about two hours, and wishes us a comfortable trip.
Soon, we’re flying in the air and I take pictures of the clouds, then a selfie.
As Cole sleeps, probably exhausted due to practice, I lean closer to him and, like a total creep, take another selfie.
When the flight attendant offers me food, I accept the fancy pasta. Soon after I finish, I regret eating it. Nausea hits me out of nowhere and I run to the bathroom and empty my stomach.
I haven’t vomited in so long. It feels sticky and my stomach feels as if tiny needles are poking it.
Strong hands pull my hair to the side and Cole pats my back with a gentle touch. “Hey, are you okay?”
“I’m not.” Tears barge into my eyes as I face him.
“What’s wrong? Have you eaten something bad?”
“No.”
“Then what is it, Silver? And don’t even think about lying to me.”
I’m tired of lying, of hiding, of watching days pass by like a ticking bomb. I want someone to share this with me. And not just anyone, him.
Cole.
Standing on wobbly feet, I wash my mouth out and head back to the seat. Cole follows me with that furrow in his brow. I let my head drop between my hands, breathing harshly. The seat creaks when Cole settles beside me and inches closer.
“Silver, what is it?”
All right, this is it. The moment of truth.
Meeting his dark greens, I murmur, “I’m pregnant.”
