Two days before Daniele’s birthday, when it was certain we would spend the weekend in the beach house, I called Mia. I hadn’t talked to her since the wedding and only exchanged the occasional short texts of pleasantries.
“Giulia, what a pleasure. Is everything all right?”
“Yes, of course.”
“Of course?” Her curiosity was unmistakable. I wondered how much she really knew about the reason for Gaia’s death. Judging by Cassio’s words, she only knew the basics.
“We’ll be spending the weekend at the beach to celebrate Daniele’s birthday, and I was wondering if you and your family would join us. Or is it too strenuous for you?” Mia’s due date was in only three weeks, so I wasn’t sure if she wanted to risk even a short trip.
“He’s taking you there already?”
I frowned. “We already spent a weekend in the house.”
“Oh. That’s wonderful, Giulia.”
Her joyous surprise caught me off guard. I thought the house was for the family, not just Cassio.
“And of course we’ll join you. Do you want me to ask Ilaria and my parents if they want to come too?”
“Yes,” I said, relieved. I had even less interaction with them and would have felt awkward calling them out of the blue, especially Cassio’s parents.
It was cold but sunny when we arrived at the beach house on Friday afternoon. Cassio had gotten Daniele’s present, which surprised me. My mother had always taken care of buying us things, but I was glad that he was trying to be involved with his kids.
After we settled in, I began assembling the ingredients for the birthday cake. Cassio scanned the display as he came up behind me. He was dressed in chinos that accentuated his long muscular legs, and his sweater did nothing to hide his broad chest. His aftershave, a spicy scent that always filled me with astonishing warmth, reached my nose, and I had to resist the urge to lean back into him. So far, we hadn’t shared any kind of intimacy in front of the kids, and I wouldn’t initiate anything.
“What’s all this for?” Cassio asked. With his body shielding me, he brushed his hand along my side, coming to rest on my hip for a brief squeeze, before he stepped back.
“A funfetti rainbow cake.”
I could see his confusion. Before doing online research, I hadn’t known such a cake either. I smiled. “You’ll see.” Daniele hovered in front of the terrace door, peering out toward the beach. Loulou sat beside him, her gaze locked on the seagulls roaming the sky. “Maybe you can take a walk on the beach with him, so he doesn’t see his cake before tomorrow?”
Cassio’s dark brows snapped together. “I can try.”
Simona crawled toward us then, using my leg to pull herself up. After her initial suspicion toward me, she now barely left my side. “I didn’t think Daniele and Simona would take to you so quickly.”
“I suppose it’s an advantage they’re so young.” Too young to really understand what had happened, especially Simona.
“Yeah.” Cassio regarded Daniele.
“Why don’t you take Loulou with you?”
Cassio’s expression morphed to reluctance at once.
“Hear me out,” I said before he could argue. “Daniele loves her. If Loulou trusts you, maybe Daniele will too. I think it’s why he started trusting me.”
“That dog won’t let me anywhere near it. It’s a miracle the thing stopped snapping at me.”
Lifting Simona up, who kept tugging on my skirt, I faced Cassio. He peered down at me and his daughter, and his expression became softer. “You could start by calling it Loulou. Give it a try. Please.”
He frowned, shaking his head, then leaned down and kissed me, catching me by surprise. Simona made grabby hands for his chin, and he snatched her fingers up with his mouth, causing her to giggle. When he pulled back, my gaze found Daniele, but he still stood with his nose practically touching the window. “All right. But won’t Loulou run off once she’s outside with me?”
“She might. Keep her on a leash.”
I grabbed the leash on the way to the window front. Cassio followed close behind. It was strange seeing a man as tough and as used to ruling over fellow mobsters at a loss on how to handle a small boy. I supposed it was easier keeping dangerous men in line than gaining back the trust of a little boy. It wasn’t something he could force, coerce, or demand. I put Loulou on the leash, and Daniele looked up at once. “You and your dad take Loulou out for a walk.”
Daniele’s head rose even higher, peering up at Cassio.
“Come on, it’s cold outside. Let’s put on your snowsuit,” he said. He picked up Daniele, who remained quiet. Five minutes later, Daniele was dressed in his warm suit, and Cassio had tossed on a coat. I held the leash out to him. He took it in a way that made it clear he’d never held one in his life. The moment I opened the door, Daniele and Loulou slipped out. Cassio followed them, ignoring Loulou’s tugging toward the beach. I watched them for a moment until they reached the ocean. It was such a beautiful sight. Cassio’s enormous frame and beside him a tiny fluffy dog and a small boy…
I didn’t have much experience baking, so I could only hope everything would work out. At least I had experience painting, so maybe food coloring would literally be a piece of cake.
Simona sat in her high chair so she could watch me. Usually she preferred to stay mobile, but watching me bake a cake seemed to grab much of her attention. I split the dough into three parts and colored each differently. After covering it with buttercream, I sprinkled everything with funfetti.
Simona was obviously fascinated by the colorful sprinkles and made grabby hands, but I didn’t want her to choke on the tiny pieces. I put the finished cake into the fridge then grabbed Simona, wrapped us both in a thick wool coat, and walked out onto the porch. Despite the blistering cold, Daniele played in the sand. Cassio sat on the edge of a lounge chair right beside him, typing on his phone and darting the occasional glance at his son. Loulou perched right beside Daniele, her nose lifted into the breeze. I walked down the wooden steps to the beach.
Cassio’s head swiveled around, alertness brimming in his body until he leveled his gaze on me and Simona. He relaxed and put his phone back into his coat jacket. “Done with the cake?”
I nodded with a smile as I took in the heaps of sand around Daniele, who looked completely concentrated on the task ahead. “Your sister and her family will be here in an hour. We should get ready.” Looking at Daniele’s sand-covered state, cleaning would probably take a while.
Cassio straightened then squatted before Daniele, who briefly glanced up. “Aunt Mia comes to visit. We need to clean you up.” He grabbed Daniele gently and lifted him to his feet then began to brush the sand from his thick snowsuit. Daniele didn’t protest, his lips pressed together. He kept peeking at Cassio and in his eyes, I saw the same longing I so often caught in Cassio’s.
“Ready to go in?” I asked.
Daniele nodded and together we walked back. Cassio cleaned up Daniele. There were fewer protests than in the past. Daniele missed his dad too. I cleaned the kitchen and set the table, glad I’d agreed to Mia’s suggestion that they bring takeout. Cooking and baking would have been too much with my limited experience.
Mia had become even rounder since the last time I saw her at the wedding. Her husband Emiliano was Cassio’s age and only briefly shook my hand before he joined Cassio for an apéritif. Mia’s two daughters were five and two and absolutely adorable with their pigtails and cute dresses. “How’s the baby?”
Mia touched her belly. “He’s good.”
“He?”
Mia smiled, but Emiliano spoke before she could. “It’s a boy.” His relief and enthusiasm were unmistakable. Men in our circles still needed an heir. I took the takeout from Mia and carried it over to the table, a bit peeved that Emiliano had allowed Mia to hold it even if it wasn’t that heavy.
“She’s getting quick,” Mia said with a nod toward Simona, who had perfected speed-crawling.
“She’s already trying to walk.”
Mia touched my shoulder, lowering her voice. “You look good. So I take it everything is going well between Cassio and you?”
“Yes.”
“I’m glad. He and the kids deserve a break.”
Cassio
It had been a while since I’d had a family dinner at the beach house. I could tell how immensely pleased Mia was over this new development. She’d been trying to convince me to do one for months.
Emiliano joined me for a quick Negroni before dinner. I caught him looking at Giulia in a way that set my teeth on edge. He wouldn’t make a move. His self-preservation was strong. He checked out every attractive woman, and unfortunately, he didn’t stop there. He cheated on Mia in every pregnancy so far. The first time I’d found out, I threatened him, told him I’d cut his dick into tiny pieces if he didn’t stop, but Mia had asked me to stay out of her marriage. She loved him and preferred to pretend he wasn’t cheating. I honored her wish, and Emiliano worked harder to keep his adultery a secret. Mia had a six sense for infidelity had immediately known when I found out about Gaia’s affair, but I’d never told her with whom. Giulia was the only person I’d told every detail. I wasn’t even sure why. My father and Faro were the obvious choices for such a confession, but with Giulia, I felt a stronger connection despite our age difference. We were complete opposites, from our outlook on life to our experiences to our level of goodness and respective badness, but we complemented each other.
Mia gave me a proud look from her spot at the table as if she could read my mind. She’d been against Gaia from the start and in favor of Giulia from the first moment she spotted her. She was right about my first wife, and I hoped she would be with Giulia as well.
The next morning, I woke shortly after sunset, wanting to wake Daniele like I’d done for his last two birthdays, but his bed was empty. I found him on the floor in front of the windows, throwing the dog’s ball so she could chase it. His tosses weren’t very far or well-aimed, but the look of determined concentration followed by delight on his face tightened my chest. “Happy birthday.”
Daniele jumped, dropping the ball. It rolled toward me then bumped against my bare foot. Loulou didn’t dare take it. I picked it up then rolled it over the ground toward Daniele. He took it and tossed it again. Loulou returned it to him eagerly. Daniele took the ball and looked down at it. “We’ll open your presents once Giulia and Simona are awake.”
He held up the ball. It took me a moment to realize why. I approached him slowly, worried he’d change his mind, then grabbed the ball and tossed it through the room for Loulou. She dashed after it as if she was possessed then returned with it. This time she dropped it in front of me. I sank down beside Daniele and held the ball out to him. “Your turn.”
He met my gaze for the first time in many months. His eyes were questioning, and if he’d just ask, I’d tell him whatever he needed to hear. He curled his small fingers around the ball then threw it. We spent a long time like this until Loulou was panting and eventually carried her ball over into her basket, done with chasing.
That was when I noticed Giulia half hidden in the doorframe, her eyes so soft my own heart skipped a beat. She cradled Simona against her chest, who still looked sleepy.
“Happy birthday, birthday boy,” she said as she walked in. “How about cake?”
Giulia lit three candles on top of a cake, which was sprinkled with what I learned was funfetti. Daniele’s eyes became wide as he took in the cake. I lifted him on one of the chairs so he could get a good look at it. “You have to blow out the candles and make a wish.”
Simona tried to lean away from Giulia to touch the candles, and her face scrunched up in frustration when she couldn’t. “Do you need help?” Giulia asked Daniele as he blew out only one candle with his first attempt.
“You’re three, a big boy. You can do it,” I told him.
He gave a small nod and blew even harder. Both candles snuffed out this time.
“Good.”
Giulia beamed as she cut the first piece of the cake. When she pulled it out, its colorful layers became visible.
“Wow,” Daniele breathed. I froze, unable to believe what I’d heard. One simple word, the first word Daniele had spoken in my presence in months.
Wow, indeed.
I had to agree with him, not just because of the rainbow funfetti cake. Giulia set down a plate in front of me and sank down on a chair with Simona on her lap, who used the moment to shove her fingers into Giulia’s cake slice.
Giulia’s laugh rang out like a bell as she snatched up Simona’s tiny hand and put it in her mouth to lick away the buttercream before wiping the remains off with a napkin. I couldn’t stop staring at her.
She noticed, her expression morphing from embarrassment to confusion. She felt her face as if she expected there to be more cake then brushed out her bangs in the nervous gesture she often expressed. I couldn’t believe I’d focused on what I perceived as wrong with Giulia—like her bangs, her quirky dresses, her age—when I first met her instead of realizing what was good. And there were so many things that even the small annoyances faded into the background. Giulia was perfect for my kids and me. Maybe because of her age because she was still youthfully optimistic, naively reckless, and daringly unconventional.
She wasn’t what I’d wanted in a wife, but hell, if she wasn’t exactly what I needed.
