I was running late to PE. I’d left my sneakers in my dorm room this morning and had to rush back to get them before making my way across campus to the school gym. I hadn’t had a chance to change yet either. I was almost to the locker room when a hand snaked out and caught hold of me from behind.
“What’s the rush?”
I gasped and turned to find Wes grinning down at me. He’d just emerged from the boys’ locker room, so I hadn’t seen him coming. He was already dressed for our sports lesson and didn’t have nearly the same urgency about him that I was feeling.
“I’m running late.”
He laughed and looked down at my school uniform. “I can see that.”
“And you’re not helping. I need to get changed.”
His smile simply widened. “You’re cute when you’re flustered.”
“Still not helping.” I blushed at the ease with which he called me cute and how it made me feel. He shouldn’t be calling me cute. And he shouldn’t be standing so close to me. I was trying to forget about the kiss we shared in his room, but it was all I could think about when his body was pressed against mine like this.
“You better get a move on, or you’ll be late to class,” he murmured.
I scowled at him because I had a feeling he knew exactly the direction my thoughts had been tracking. “That’s what I was saying,” I complained before turning to dart into the girls’ locker room. His soft laughter followed behind me.
I changed in what must have been record time before rushing to the basketball courts. One of my shoelaces was undone, and my hair was a mess from throwing my top over my head, but I didn’t care. I could fix it all when I got to class. I just hoped I wouldn’t get a detention.
I’d been worried about being late to class, but the teacher hadn’t shown up yet either, and most of the students were milling around on the bleachers. I joined Cress and Anna on one of the benches, and as I sat, I noticed Noah scowling at me from the other side of the court. I had no idea what I’d done to piss him off, but I chose to ignore him.
“No Coach August yet?” I asked the girls.
Anna started to respond, but as she did, the teacher walked into view. “We’re moving on to squash today, everyone,” he said. “So, we’re going over to the squash courts.”
There were a few groans from the class, but I wasn’t sure why. I’d never played squash before, but it looked like fun. I stood with Anna and Cress and was about to follow the rest of the class, but Coach August came over to me.
“Not you, Miss Grace,” he said. “You still haven’t completed the beep test from the first class of term. You’ll be undertaking it today along with one other student. I won’t be here to oversee it, so I’m putting a lot of faith in you to be honest with your results. If you score yourself higher than you actually achieve, you’ll have no room for improvement this year. You’ll only be failing yourself.”
“Yes, Coach,” I replied, as Cress and Anna both grimaced in my direction. Squash was looking really good right about now.
He turned and joined the rest of the class leaving the gym while Anna and Cress continued to hover at my side.
“This sucks,” Cress said. “I thought he’d forgotten about your beep test.”
“Me too,” I replied. “I guess I better get it over with.”
The girls shared sympathetic smiles.
“Maybe we can go to Toddy’s after school for milkshakes to make you feel better?” Cress suggested.
“That sounds really great,” I replied. “I think I’ll need a pick-me-up.”
“It’s a date then. We’ll see you after class.” The girls waved and then lightly jogged to catch up with the rest of the class, disappearing from the gym far too quickly.
Once they were out of sight, I turned to search for the cones and the stereo Coach August had left behind for me. Only it wasn’t the cones I noticed when I turned. Noah was standing there waiting for me.
“What are you doing? Wait, you’re the one who’s redoing the test?”
“I didn’t get the result I was after.” Noah shrugged. “Besides, I asked to redo it weeks ago so you wouldn’t have to take it alone. It was back when we were…” He didn’t need to finish his sentence. I knew he was talking about when we were dating. It was sweet he’d done that, but it made things awkward now.
“Well, I’m sure Coach August will understand if you tell him you don’t want to retake it.” I was sure the last thing Noah wanted was to spend an entire class alone with me. I certainly wasn’t keen given the way things were between us. Everything felt relatively civil, especially after he took care of me last week in New York, but that didn’t mean it was easy to be around him.
It hurt to be in his presence. To feel my heart tugging me toward him and know I couldn’t act on it. And there was always an underlying tension. Whenever he was near, it was like the air was snapped taut between us, and it didn’t matter whether I liked him, hated him, or wanted nothing to do with him, that feeling was always there.
“Who said I don’t want to retake it?” he replied.
I let out a sigh. I was trying to give him an easy way out, but apparently Noah was a glutton for pain. “I guess we better get started then.”
I walked over to the stereo that had been left on the ground and turned on the recording before walking to the first cone. Noah came and stood right by me. We had the whole court to ourselves; did he really have to stand so close?
The test didn’t start right away. There was a monologue at the start of the recording explaining how it all worked. I wasn’t sure I heard a single word. I was too focused on Noah. If we were going to be stuck together like this, then I had something I needed to ask him.
“I saw you on Friday,” I said as we waited.
He seemed confused by my comment. “That’s hardly surprising seeing as we were both on the same field trip.”
“Except you weren’t on the field trip,” I said. “I saw you outside my father’s building.”
A flicker of surprise shot through Noah’s gaze. He quickly covered it with a shrug. “So, we both skipped The Met. Again, not that surprising.”
“Given your history with my family, it was kind of surprising. What were you doing there?”
“Certainly not seeing your father, if that’s what you’re getting at,” he said. His features twisted with such distaste I reeled back from him.
I wasn’t going to be put off by the irritation in his eyes. “So, what were you doing there then?”
“That’s really none of your business.”
“I guess I’ll just have to ask my father then.”
Noah huffed in response. “Like I said, my visit had nothing to do with him, so he won’t be able to tell you. If you must know, I was there to see my lawyer. He has the great misfortune of sharing an office building with The LaFleur Corporation.”
“Oh,” I murmured. Wes had mentioned there were other offices in the building. Maybe it was a simple coincidence. I couldn’t imagine why a seventeen-year-old needed to see a lawyer, but Noah wasn’t your average teen.
“So, is being nosy something we do now?” Noah asked. “Because you looked awfully close with Wes outside the gym just before…”
I shot him a scowl. I didn’t need to explain myself to him. Still, I found myself taking the bait. “Wes and I are friends; of course, we’re close.”
“It looked more than friendly to me.”
“Well, you must be seeing things. Maybe you should get your eyes checked out?”
Thankfully the first beep of the test finally sounded, and I started to jog, eager to get away from Noah. He fell in right beside me, his feet slapping against the ground in perfect unison with my own.
“I’ve heard things too,” he said after we’d done several laps between the two cones. Apparently, he wasn’t done with our discussion. I definitely was, and I chose to ignore his comment. “Sawyer likes to talk a lot at soccer training.”
“He likes to talk a lot period,” I muttered. “But I prefer not to talk when I’m running.”
I wondered if Noah was trying to hint that he knew Wes and I had kissed. I had a bad feeling that was exactly what he was getting at, and I really didn’t want to talk about it with him.
Noah remained silent for several more laps. We were already jogging quite quickly, and my breaths were beginning to come in faster. He barely sounded puffed in comparison, but that was hardly a surprise given how fit he was.
“Are the two of you together?” His voice hitched slightly as he spoke.
I stopped in the middle of the court and turned to him. “Why are you asking me this?” I said between exhausted breaths. “Why do you care?”
He’d stopped barely a foot away from me, his green eyes stormy and filled with pain. “You know I still care. It’s just… I didn’t think you’d move on from us so fast.”
“I can move on however fast I want,” I replied. “You broke up with me. You don’t get to dictate how I move on.”
“You are with him then?”
“Not that it’s any of your business, but I’m not. We’re friends, just like I told you.”
“So, you’re kissing your friends now?”
“I’m kissing whoever can make me forget about you for just one moment. You think I’m moving on too fast, but that’s just the problem. I can’t seem to move on from you at all. You didn’t just break my heart when we broke up, you decimated it, and no matter what I do, I can’t fit the pieces back together again. So, yeah, I kissed Wes, and maybe I’ll do it again. We can’t be together, and I’m trying to accept that. Maybe you need to accept that too.”
I turned to walk away, but Noah called after me. “You think it’s easy for me to accept losing the best thing that’s ever happened to me?”
His words were a dagger straight to my heart, and I glanced over my shoulder at him. “If you really felt that way, we never would have broken up.”
He opened his mouth and went to say something but quickly closed it again. He looked lost for words, and I shook my head. He was never going to fight for us, and we both knew it.
I spun round and stormed away from him before he could torment me any further.
NOAH’S WORDS haunted me the rest of the day, so I was glad when Wes suggested we study together in the library after dinner. I hated that Noah had gotten in my head, and I jumped at the chance to fill my thoughts with economics homework instead.
Unfortunately, my economics homework didn’t want to be in my thoughts. I must have been a terrible study partner. Wes was having to ask me something several times before I registered the question, and even when I heard him, I had no clue what the answer was. My mind was somewhere else entirely, and most of my homework lay unfinished on the desk.
“You seem distracted,” Wes said after I’d misheard one of his questions yet again.
“I know. I’m sorry. I…” My voice trailed off as I looked at him. “Wait, you wear glasses?”
I was surprised I hadn’t noticed him put them on, especially since they made him look like some kind of hot librarian. They gave off all these sexy nerd vibes, and now that I’d seen them, they were impossible to ignore.
I didn’t know he needed glasses. I’d never seen him wearing them before. Maybe he realized he couldn’t use them too often because they gave him too much power. He knew he would constantly captivate all the girls at school if he wore them every day.
“You only just noticed? Your head is in the clouds tonight.” He gave a nervous smile. “But, yeah, I wear glasses for reading sometimes. I’m always forgetting them though.”
“Uh-huh.” Man, even I sounded completely captivated by him right now. I’d only just noticed the glasses, but their power was getting to me already.
He frowned at my response. “You think I look silly.”
He went to remove them, but I lifted a hand in complaint. “Don’t…”
He paused, lightly grasping the side of the frame between his finger and thumb.
“I like the glasses,” I said.
He dropped his hand and tilted his head to the side as he watched me. “I can’t tell if you’re making fun of me.”
“I’m definitely not.”
“Sawyer says I look stupid in them.”
“I’m sure he’s just jealous.”
“I don’t think so. I’m pretty sure he needs glasses too, but he refuses to get them.”
It was probably a good thing Sawyer didn’t also have glasses. I couldn’t even begin to imagine the kind of damage the twins would inflict on girls’ hearts if they both walked around the school looking like young blond versions of Clark Kent.
“Well, I think the glasses look great.”
He slowly gave me a smile and shifted slightly closer to me. “Really?”
I nodded, not quite able to find my words now that he was sitting so close. We were at a desk in the main section of the library, and there were enough students around that there was no way Wes was going to kiss me again. It didn’t stop my eyes from dropping to his lips though. Ever since I’d told him we were never kissing again, it was all I’d been able to think about, especially when he was around. Things felt so much better when he kissed me, would it really be so bad if I gave in to the temptation again?
I think Wes might have been thinking the same thing because his lips were only inches from mine. I hadn’t even seen him move. Or had I been the one that moved? One small kiss in the library wasn’t all that bad, was it?
A cough sounded behind us, and we both jerked backward, my cheeks flaming bright red. I turned to find the crotchety, old librarian frowning down at us. “You two. No funny business in the library,” she hissed.
I swallowed and quickly nodded. Wes and I responded at the same time, “Yes, Miss Davis.”
She lifted an eyebrow, and I quickly turned back to my homework, focusing on it until she moved away. As soon as she was out of earshot, Wes and I burst into hushed laughter, making the whole table next to us turn and shoot us curious looks. I tried my best to ignore them. I’d already overheard them gossiping about Wes and me this evening. People needed to mind their own business.
“That was close,” Wes said.
“Was it?” I turned to him. “I had no intention of partaking in any funny business in the library…”
He gave me a smile. “Sure, you didn’t.”
“I didn’t.”
“No one would blame you if you did. You do find me irresistible in my glasses, after all.”
“I didn’t say you were irresistible.”
“Your lips might not have, but your eyes did.” He gave me a cheeky grin. “And knowing how much you like the glasses, I’m thinking I should be more responsible with my eyesight and wear them more often.”
“I mean, if you want girls throwing themselves at you in the corridor, then go right ahead.”
“There’s only one girl I want throwing herself at me…”
My cheeks flushed as I glanced away. Wes was doing a terrible job at sticking within the friend zone. Ever since we’d kissed, the border of the zone had become blurry, and he’d been dancing right across it far too frequently this week.
The thing was, I didn’t hate it when he flirted with me. In fact, I quite liked it. It was easy and fun, and Wes always managed to make me smile. It didn’t hurt that he was gorgeous either.
Wes was still grinning when I focused back on him. “We’re really not getting much of our economics homework done, are we?” he said.
“Not really.”
“Want to take a walk outside instead? Perhaps we’ll focus better if we clear our heads.”
I wasn’t sure if he was talking in code or not. We’d been so close to kissing before that my mind immediately conjured up thoughts of finding somewhere far more secluded and finishing what we nearly started. He looked genuine enough though, and I was pretty sure I was just wishful thinking. I began to pack my books away. “A walk sounds great.”
We went to leave our table, but as I looked up, I found Luther and Kaden seated not far from us. They were watching me closely. Given the matching looks of accusation in their eyes, they must have seen me nearly kiss Wes.
My throat constricted with a feeling of guilt, but I knew I had no reason to feel guilty. I was single and allowed to kiss whomever I wanted. Admittedly, I probably needed to avoid nearly kissing them in the library and with an audience, but I’d done nothing wrong.
“I just need to borrow these books,” Wes said, holding up several texts he’d gathered before I met him in the library. “It won’t take me more than a few minutes. Can I meet you outside?”
I gave him a tight smile. “Sure.”
As he headed over to the librarian, I turned toward Luther and Kaden once more. Their eyes were still on me, and I stormed over to their table. Luther leaned back in his chair as I approached, a disapproving look on his face. Kaden didn’t appear nearly so judgmental, but I could see the disappointment in his eyes.
“What’s with you and Wes?” Luther demanded.
“That’s none of your business.”
“Except, I think it is. I told you not to give up on Noah.”
“And I told you that was unfair. I never agreed with you.”
“So? What? You’re with Wesley Montfort now?”
“Like I said, that’s not your concern.”
He shrugged. “It will be when Noah finds out. And he’s going to find out. Every kid in the library has been trying not to throw up from watching the two of you canoodle in here all night.”
I glanced around the room, and several people quickly looked away, avoiding my gaze. No matter what I did in this school, it seemed I always had an audience. I didn’t want Luther’s words to affect me, but they did. My chest tightened, and my heart struggled to remember the way it had been so happily beating only moments ago. I didn’t want Noah to hear anything that might upset him, but I also couldn’t spend the rest of my life walking on eggshells because I was worried about how he might feel. We were over, and despite Luther’s concerns, Wes and I weren’t in a relationship. We were just two hurt souls trying to help stitch each other back together.
“We weren’t canoodling. Wes and I are just friends,” I finally said.
“It didn’t look that way to me or anyone else here,” Luther replied.
“Noah’s going to be really hurt,” Kaden added. It was the first thing he’d said in the conversation, and somehow his quiet condemnation hurt just as much as Luther’s hard words.
“How is this my fault?” My voice was raised, and several students looked up from their books. I made sure to talk much quieter as I continued. “I know you’re both Noah’s friends, but he’s the one who chose to end our relationship. You can’t get pissed at me for accepting that and moving on.”
“So, you admit it, you’re moving on.”
I scowled at Luther. “Of course, I want to move on. Nobody wants to stay miserable.”
“I think Noah does.” Once again, Kaden’s words were calm and thoughtful, and they cut deeper because of it.
“Well, that’s his problem. Not mine.” I shook my head. “Look, I’m not going to let you two make me feel guilty about anything I do or don’t do. Noah and I are over, and I’m going to keep doing my best to put our relationship behind me. So, stop with your judgmental stares and cryptic advice. It’s not helping anyone.”
I turned and walked away before either of the boys could respond. I wasn’t quite sure what I’d hoped to achieve by talking to Kaden and Luther, but it had only served to make me more annoyed. They were acting like I’d betrayed Noah, but we weren’t together anymore, and all I was doing was trying to survive the aftermath of our breakup. Was I really the bad guy for spending time with the one person who helped me forget the pain?
I was still sparking with irritation as I made my way from the library. I was sick of being told how to feel and what to think. And I hated how invested people had become in my love life. It was no one else’s business but my own, and yet I constantly seemed to hear other students gossiping about it. I was so sick of it, and I just wanted to take control of the narrative for once. More than anything, I just needed my whirring mind to stop.
Wes was already waiting for me in the corridor. There were other students milling around, but I barely noticed them as he started smiling at me. His expression dimmed when he saw my stormy demeanor.
“What’s wrong?” he asked.
I took a breath to try to calm myself. “It’s nothing.”
“Did something happen?”
“Just Kaden and Luther.” I shook my head. “But they’re not the real problem. I know they want to protect their friend. It’s everyone else that’s getting to me. I’m so sick of the gossip in this place. I swear, no matter what I do people are always talking about me. I’m single. I should be able to do whatever I want.”
He watched me for a second before he slowly started to smile. “So, you should do what you want then…”
“What—” I started to speak, but my question was cut off as Wes pulled me toward him, my hands landing against his chest as he wrapped his arms about me. His face was so close to mine, and I could sense everyone in the corridor was watching us. His eyes danced with mischief, and my heart raced in response.
“What exactly do you think I want?” I whispered.
“What you wanted in New York. And in my room…”
My eyes went to his mouth as he spoke. “You think I want to kiss you?”
“I mean, it wouldn’t be the first time,” he said. “And you did nearly partake in ‘funny business’ with me in the library.”
“I did not. I—”
He silenced my protests by pulling me closer and kissing me like we were completely alone in the world. For a few blissful moments, my mind went totally blank, and my body buzzed with a new kind of emotion. Wes’s lips worked their magic and somehow rebooted me, so when we drew apart, I no longer felt annoyed or worried.
He grinned, his cheeks turning slightly pink as he looked around at the staring students. “I don’t think I’ve helped you with your gossip problem.”
“No,” I agreed, my cheeks flushing too. Although if what Kaden and Luther had said was true, the kids who’d been watching Wes and I in the library tonight probably wouldn’t be surprised.
“I’m sure they will just blame the glasses. Really, you had no chance of resisting me.”
I laughed. “They are kind of irresistible.”
“I knew it.” He winked. “Remind me again why I shouldn’t wear them all the time?”
“Because I have no self-control when you do.”
“Now we couldn’t have that, could we?”
I swallowed as the more rational part of my brain started to kick in. “We probably shouldn’t have done that.” There were many reasons why, but I was already concerned about damaging my friendship with Wes. That was only going to intensify now that everyone at school would think we were together.
Wes waved my concern off with one hand. “Don’t overthink it. It was just one friend helping another out.” It was almost like he could read my mind.
“You’re sure it was nothing more?”
“It was nothing more,” he agreed. “You ready for our walk?”
“Uh, sure.” He was sounding way too calm and collected about all this. Meanwhile, I was internally beginning to freak out.
Wes lightly wrapped an arm over my shoulder and started to guide me away from the library, happily ignoring the whispers and curious looks that trailed us as we went.
I had no idea how he could act so unaffected by the attention. But more so, how he was so convinced that our kiss meant nothing. He was clearly fine with us just being friends. But why was a part of me disappointed?
