Everything is dark.
Heavy.
My throat burns and my limbs feel like lead. And my head…
My head pounds.
A persistent bass drumming through my skull. Ba-boom. Ba-boom. Ba-boom.
“W-what?” I croak as I slowly peek an eye open. Blinding light assaults me and I cry out.
“Ssh,” someone says from nearby. “You need to take it easy, Remi, sweetheart.”
Mom.
It’s Mom.
My pulse settles at the familiar cadence of her voice, but my eyes are having a real hard time trying to adjust to the stark light.
“You’re in the hospital, baby.” She takes my hand, giving me a point of focus.
I turn my head slightly, trying not to worsen the dull thud vibrating inside my head. “It—it hurts,” I say, my throat dry and sore. Widening my eyes, I finally see her murky outline. It shimmers and stretches until I can eventually see Mom staring back at me with tearful eyes.
“God, I’m so happy you’re awake.”
“W-what happened?”
“You don’t remember?”
I press my chapped lips together, panic rising inside me. “I… remember La Dolce Vita… and then…”
Nothing.
There’s nothing.
Just a dark void.
A violent shiver rolls through me. “Mom,” I whisper, “I’m scared.”
“Ssh, Remi, I’m right here.” Tears roll down her face. “Everything’s going to be okay, baby.”
Just then, I hear movement from behind me. “Is she—”
“She’s awake, Paul.”
“Dad?” I instinctively try to look, but pain rips through my skull and I whimper.
“Get a nurse,” Mom says. “Please. Try and relax, sweetheart. The doctor said you could be very disoriented at first.” My eyes flutter shut as her touch soothes me into darkness. It hurts less here, so I allow myself to drift.
I let the void claim me.
The next time I wake, the splitting pain in my head isn’t as overwhelming. I breathe through it as I force open my eyes and take in my surroundings. Cold and clinical, the hospital room is all pale colors and sterile vibes. I search for Mom, but don’t find her. I do, however, find Conner asleep in a chair in the corner of the room.
“C-Conner?” I test my voice, shocked at the little squeak it makes.
His eyes flicker open, and he bolts upright. “You’re awake. Thank fuck, you’re awake.”
“W-water… I need…” My eyes go to the small table.
“Here, here.” He jumps up and rushes to the side of the bed. There are some plastic cups and a box of straws. Conner pours me some water, adds a straw, and lowers it to my mouth.
The icy cold liquid soothes the burning in my throat. “Thank you,” I say, unable to believe how exhausted I am after such a menial task.
“Shit, Princess, you gave us all a scare.” Conner drags the chair over and sits. But I’m rigid, a distant memory vying for my attention.
Princess.
Why does that sound so—
It hits me all at once.
Ace. Having sex with Ace. The way he broke me afterward. The cruel things he said…
I whimper, tears trickling from my eyes.
“Oh, shit, Remi, don’t cry. Your mom and my uncle will be back soon. They went to get something to eat. Your mom hardly leaves your side. She’s been so worried.” His face is as white as a sheet. “We all have.”
“Ace—”
“Hey, now.” His expression turns grim. “Don’t you dare worry about my asshole of a brother. He’s not important. You are. You need to get better, Remi. You need—”
“Remi?” Mom rushes to my side. “Thank God.” She brushes the hair from my face.
“So, I’ll just… go,” Conner says.
“Thank you for staying with her.” He gives my mom a sharp nod. But as he walks away, I call, “Wait.”
Conner glances back. “What happened to me?” I ask.
“I…” He looks at my mom, and she shakes her head. His lips purse as his eyes settle back on me. “It’s good to see you awake, Princess.” With that, he leaves.
“Mom,” I sigh. “What’s going on? What aren’t you telling me?”
“Oh, sweetheart, don’t worry about that right now. All that’s important is that you rest and get better.”
“There’s our girl.” James breezes into the room, coming over to Mom and dropping a kiss on her head. “It’s nice to see you awake.”
My brows pinch, sending a ripple of pain through my head. I wince.
“The doctor said it will hurt for a while.”
“Is anyone going to tell me what the hell happened, or are you just going to both keep standing there, looking at me like that?”
Mom gasps and James rubs her shoulder. They look like someone died. But I didn’t die, I’m alive.
I’m right here.
So the what the fuck happened?
“You were hurt, sweetheart.” Mom swallows, tears still glossing her eyes. I notice the lines on her face, the dark shadows.
“Mom?” My voice cracks. Whatever happened is bad.
I know it is.
Dread snakes through me, making my stomach turn.
“Can you remember anything, baby? Anything at all?”
I close my eyes, searching the recesses of my mind, desperately trying to avoid the painful memories of Ace’s betrayal. “We got mani-pedis at La Dolce Vita. James treated us.” My eyes open and land on his. He smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes.
“I think we drove back to the house and…” Hadley’s face flickers on the edge of my mind. “Hadley was there.”
“Good, sweetheart. That’s good.” Mom covers my hand with hers, squeezing. There’s an IV disappearing into my right hand and I’m hooked up to various machines, but I can feel all my limbs.
“I’m okay, right?”
“We threw you a party, a birthday party at James’ house. It was a surprise.” She says the words, but there’s nothing, not even a flicker of recognition. “There was some trouble—”
“Trouble?” Another bolt of pain shoots through my skull.
“We should wait, Sarah, until she’s had some time.”
“Don’t do that,” I bite. The two of them pale. “I woke up in the hospital with no memory of how I got here. I think I deserve to know what happened.”
A machine starts to beep, and a nurse rushes into the room. “It’s good to see you awake, Remi. Let’s see what’s happening here, shall we?” She shoos my mom and James out of the way before fiddling with the machine. “Your blood pressure is a little elevated. You need to try and rest.” She flicks her eyes to my mom. “She needs to remain as calm as possible.”
“Yes, of course, sorry.”
The nurse checks my IV, tweaking something, and I start to feel drowsy.
“Will you tell me what happened?” I ask. She stills, her warm smile settling something inside me.
“You sustained a serious head injury, Remi. There was swelling in your brain, so the doctors placed you into a medically-induced coma to give your brain a chance to heal.”
“A coma?”
“It’s not as scary as it sounds, I promise.”
“H-how long was I…”
“Thirteen days.”
Thirteen days… My stomach knots, and the machine starts beeping again.
“Relax, Remi.” The nurse smiles again. “You’re in the best place, and the doctors are confident you’ll make a full recovery. But you need to rest, and you need to try and stay calm, okay? I’ve given you something to help you relax.”
I nod, inhaling a shaky breath. “I can do that.”
It’s not like I’m going anywhere in a hurry.
She grabs the chart from the foot of my bed and scribbles some notes. “The doctor will probably be along later to see you. If you need anything, just hit the buzzer.”
After she’s gone, I let out a weary sigh.
“What is it, sweetheart? Are you tired? We can leave you—”
I want to beg her to tell me what really happened, but I can already feel myself slipping.
“We’ll be back later, sweetheart.” I feel Mom’s fingers brush my head, but my eyes are heavy with sleep.
I fall slowly into a dream. Everyone’s there and they’re laughing, maniacal and ugly cackles, their fingers pointing at me.
Slut.
Whore.
Prep school pornstar.
Tears roll down my cheeks as their cruel words assault me.
And right in the middle of them, standing there like a dark angel wrapped in danger and inked in sin, is Ace.
Almost an entire day passes before I’m lucid enough again to talk. The doctor informed me earlier that it’s normal after a brain injury.
A brain injury?
I can hardly believe it, except from the persistent tingle of pain in my head, I know it’s true.
The good news is they do expect I’ll make a full recovery. The bad news is that I still can’t remember what happened.
Mom eventually caved and told me the truth. Apparently, there was a fight, and I got caught in the crossfire. Bexley hit me by accident and I fell, cracking my head on the edge of the pool.
Her words felt sincere, but there’s a disconnect I can’t seem to get past. I’m hoping Hadley will be able to fill in some of the blanks.
As if she hears my thoughts, my friend’s head appears around the door. “I come bearing Twizzlers and Swedish Fish.”
“A girl after my own heart. Gimme the candy.” I beckon her in.
“I’m so freakin’ relieved you’re okay.” She drops into the chair beside my bed. “You gave us all a fright for a second.”
“Worried you’d have to survive senior year without me?”
“Remi,” she chokes out, sadness washing over her.
“Too soon for the I-almost-died jokes, huh?”
Silence stretches out between us. Hadley dries her eyes and lets out a long breath. “You’re a mess,” she says, but I ignore her.
“I need to know what happened, Hads,” I say.
“Didn’t your mom—”
“She told me what she thinks I can handle. But I need to know the truth.”
“You can remember going to La Dolce Vita with your mom?” I nod, but Hadley hesitates, tugging her bottom lip between her teeth.
“Hadley?” I prompt.
She gasps. “Well, she asked me to meet you at the house. I was supposed to distract you while she helped James set up the finishing touches for your party. But you were upset.”
“Because of Ace.” My chest tightens.
“I was hoping you might have forgotten that.” She grimaces. “You saw Michaela in La Dolce Vita, and she said some stuff.”
“She did?” I could remember being there, but I couldn’t remember—
I suck in a sharp breath as the hazy memory fills my mind. “She said she’d seen him.”
Pain coils around my heart. Hurting me is one thing, but giving Michaela ammunition against me is the ultimate betrayal.
“My mom invited her to the party, didn’t she?” Frustration burns through me. “She invited all of them?”
I can’t see their faces, but I know they were there. It’s a strange feeling, to know but not know, as if there’s something blocking the full memory from revealing itself to me.
“Yeah, everyone was there. We may have turned up drunk.”
“I would have paid to see that,” I chuckle.
“Bexley was all over you like a bad rash, of course. He’s been calling your mom every day.”
“Ugh,” I grumble.
“My sentiments exactly. If it wasn’t for him trying to wail on Ace, you wouldn’t be here.”
“What was Ace even doing there?” It makes no sense why he’d come to my party after he made his true feelings toward me perfectly clear.
Something passes over Hadley’s expression. “What is it?”
“What?” She blinks. “Nothing. I’m just thinking it shouldn’t have gone down like that.”
A tingle spreads through me. She’s not telling me everything. I don’t know how I know, I just do.
Closing my eyes, I inhale a deep breath. There’s nothing more frustrating than people keeping you in the dark because they think you’re not strong enough to handle the truth. But I’m hardly in a position to argue.
“You can ask about him, you know.” Hadley breaks the silence. “I won’t judge.”
“Who, Bexley?”
“No, not Bexley. But it’s nice to know you’re still as sarcastic as ever.” She smirks.
“Just tell me… how bad is it?”
Her expression falls, and I know she knows exactly what I’m talking about.
Reaching over, Hadley takes my hand in hers and gives me a sad smile. “I’m not going to sugarcoat it, girl. It’s bad. It’s really fucking bad. But you can’t worry about that now. You need to get better and get out of this place, and then we’ll deal with the rest, okay?”
“God, I hate this.” I screw my eyes shut, trying to regulate my breathing. If I let myself get too worked up, the nurse will barge in here and start lecturing me.
“Hey.” Hadley squeezes my hand. “The most important thing is that you’re okay. When I saw you lying there in Ac—” She stops herself, guilt glittering in her eyes.
My body trembles as a memory crashes over me. It isn’t a vivid image but a harsh sound.
My name.
A scream so full of pain and fear it makes my blood run cold.
Ace.
Mom had explained that after Bexley had accidentally hit me instead of Ace and I’d fallen, I’d plummeted into the pool. But she never got to the part about who had pulled me out.
“Ace saved me,” I choke out, my heart breaking all over again, “didn’t he?”
Hadley’s smile falls as says the three little words that mean far more than they should. “Yeah, he did.”
