I thought maybe there’d been a flash of jealousy in Hendrick’s gaze when Cam asked me to dance, but I’m starting to think I’m too drunk to trust my own brain. One dance turned to two and then I got pulled into a game of beer pong (can confirm I still suck at it) with Cam and his friends.
Hendrick hasn’t interrupted and he isn’t even hanging that close. He’s still watching me, of course, but if he’s bothered by me spending time with Cam it doesn’t show on his always grumpy and serious face.
Violet comes over to where I’m sitting with Cam in a lawn chair next to the keg. “We’re gonna go. Do you want to ride home with us?”
I look past her to see Gavin, Daisy, and Jordan all standing in a little group waiting for her.
“No. I think I’m gonna stay a little longer.”
“She’s definitely staying.” Cam places a hand on my knee. He’s been very touchy tonight and more attentive than I thought he was capable of being. Almost as attentive as my roommates’ boyfriends have been with them all night.
“Are you sure?” she asks again, eyes pleading with me like she thinks it’s a terrible idea.
It’s well after midnight, and the party is dying. The music is quieter, no one’s dancing anymore, and everyone that’s left is just kind of sitting and hanging out in groups around the yard.
“I’ll get a ride home from Hendrick later.” I let myself look over to where he’s sitting with Archer and Brogan and a few other guys I recognize as football players.
His gaze flicks to me and then quickly away. He does that often, always checking on me but not letting his stare linger too long, like he’s checking in but trying to give me space.
“Okay.” She reaches down to hug me and whispers near my ear, “Be careful. Love you.”
“Love you too.” I squeeze her back.
When she’s gone, I realize Cam’s hand is still on my knee. It feels good to be wanted, but his touch doesn’t have the same tingling effect that Hendrick’s does. My mind takes a quick trip down memory lane to the time we kissed in his room, and then to earlier today in the garage, and finally to tonight, dancing with him. A shiver wracks my body.
“You cold?” Cam asks, sliding his hand higher.
His hands aren’t as strong and rough as Hendrick’s, but my body still heats with pleasure as his thumb strokes the inside of my leg. “Maybe a little.”
“Yeah, me too. So, how do you know Hendrick Holland?” Cam asks. “I didn’t recognize him earlier. Kinda weird that an ex-pro football player is crashing a college party, don’t you think?”
My claws come out as Cam glances over in Hendrick’s direction with something like disgust.
“He’s actually a really cool guy,” I say. “We have mutual friends. And he’s here with his brothers.” It’s as close to the truth as I can say.
Cam shrugs. “Looks like this place is about to be a ghost town. You wanna get out of here and come back to my place?”
I don’t know why his offer surprises me since his hand is only a few inches from my vagina, but it does.
“Back to your place? For the night?” I probably sound like an idiot, but I need him to spell it out for me.
“Well, yeah. There’s probably still a few guys up so we can drink and chill, and then you can crash with me.” His hand creeps an inch higher, making his intentions very clear.
I won’t lie, part of me wants to go for no other reason than to see this thing through and find out if Cam can make me forget about the massive crush I have on my bodyguard.
I’ve been berating myself all night about being so loose with my affection for him when he’s been very clear about what can and can’t happen between us. It’s not fair to him.
Still, I know going home with a guy I don’t know that well—not to mention one who didn’t exactly impress me on our first and only date—amidst everything going on is a dumb idea. I can’t very well ask Hendrick to tag along while I hook up with some other guy. Can I? I consider it in my drunken state.
“Are you ready to go?” Hendrick’s deep voice cuts through the night air. When I glance back at him, his gaze is hard with . . . jealousy? Maybe. Grumpiness at being out past his bedtime? Most likely.
“I got her, man,” Cam says as his hold on my leg tightens. “She’s coming home with me.”
If looks could kill, Cam would be a very dead man. I stand quickly and step in front of Hendrick. “Actually, I think I better call it a night. It was good to see you.”
“Don’t go. It’s still early. I can give you a ride to your place later if you want.”
Hendrick looks like he’s seconds away from busting a blood vessel in his eye. Yeah, I need to get him out of here.
“Sorry. I really should go now.” I give Cam a small wave as I step away from him.
Hendrick’s already heading for the house, leaving me to hurry after him in shoes that were not meant for rushing.
“I need to say goodbye to Dahlia,” I tell him.
He nods, his grumpiness still making his features hard and dangerous looking.
I spot Felix’s black hair and Dahlia is right next to him. I push past Hendrick to get to her.
As soon as she sees my face, her smile drops. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, just tired. I hit a wall.”
Her lips curve back into a small smile. “Tonight was fun. I’m glad you came.”
“Me too.” My throat is thick with emotion. “Are you staying here tonight?”
“Yeah, I planned on it. Is that okay? You’re staying at Hendrick’s, right?”
“Right. Yeah.” How could I forget I have to go home with the guy currently glowering at me.
“Okay.” She hugs me. “Text me and let me know you made it home.”
“I will.”
She looks past me to him. “He doesn’t look very happy either. Are you sure everything is okay? Did something happen with you two?”
“Nothing happened, I promise. I just need sleep and he’s probably tired because he’s old.”
She laughs and with another hug, we finally say our goodbyes.
The street is dark and quiet as Hendrick and I walk the block from the house to get to his truck. He unlocks it and opens the passenger side door, still saying nothing.
He’s annoyed, I think, but I don’t totally understand why, and I don’t want to fight with him.
Before I can get in the truck, he blocks me by putting his body between me and the open door. “Tell me you weren’t seriously thinking about going home with that dickwad. What if something happened?” He keeps his voice low. “What if it is Cam?”
Could Cam be the one who sent me that email? I shake my head. “It’s not Cam. And you don’t really believe that either or you wouldn’t have let me hang out with him all night.”
His jaw tightens. “You can do way better than that guy. Way fucking better.”
“Maybe you didn’t hear me when I told him no?” I say in a sassy voice as I cross my arms over my chest. “And don’t give me the whole ‘you can do way better’ speech. I know exactly who Cam is and what he wants from me. So what? Who says that isn’t exactly what I’m looking for? You don’t know everything there is to know about me, Hendrick Holland.” I shout the words at him. God, he can rile me up. Dammit. I’m tired and angry and sad this night is over. It was fun and I forgot how much I enjoyed being out with my friends.
“Bullshit, that isn’t what you want.”
“How would you know? Did our one make-out session make you an expert on my sex life?”
His dark eyes bore into me and his jaw flexes, but he’s silent. Maybe I stunned him or maybe he’s mulling over more angry words to yell at me, but it doesn’t matter because I’m just drunk enough to say exactly what I’m feeling.
“I want to be kissed and pushed up against the wall. I want my clothes to be torn from my body and I want multiple orgasms and I want my life not to be so damn complicated. Ever since I became Ivy again, guys treat me weird. I know Cam does too, but at least he’s transparent about what he wants from me. So even if it’s bullshit, sometimes it’s fun to be wanted like a normal college girl.”
“Don’t be stupid, Jane. Lots of people want you.” He seems as annoyed by that as by the thought of me having sex with Cam.
“Oh, really?” I step closer to him. “People like you?”
He says nothing, but his throat works as he swallows.
“Exactly. So don’t give me this caveman bullshit. You missed your shot, buddy.”
Crap. I shouldn’t have said that last part. His face twists into a regretful expression. “Jane—”
“Save it. I don’t need another ‘I can’t protect you if we’re sleeping together’ lecture. Can we just drop it?”
The air is thick between us as I wait for his reply that doesn’t come.
“Please, Hendrick? Just take me home.”
