Rolling over in bed, I feel his warmth before I even open my eyes. Neither of us talked about him spending the night with me, but after we were fully satiated and he slipped under the covers with me, I couldn’t make him leave. There’s something about him that makes me feel safe and having his arms wrapped around me put me to sleep in no time.
We keep making these same mistakes and it’s only a matter of time before it’s going to come back to bite one of us in the ass. With the way Hayden is able to disconnect, I have a feeling it’s going to be me that will get bit.
And then I’ll be left with a hole in my chest, in the shape of Hayden King.
I want things to be simple between us, with no complications. When it ends, it ends. No lingering feelings or repercussions from our actions together. It’s all easier said than done. I didn’t want Hayden to work his way under my skin, but it’s too late.
He’s already there.
He’s been there longer than I’ve realized or wanted to admit. If he would have just let things go after that first time over the summer, I wouldn’t be having this damn problem with him. I need to follow his instructions, though. Just stop overthinking. Don’t put more thought into this and make it something it’s not. Just take it for what it is—whatever the hell that is.
I’ll just live in my own little fantasy world until the inevitable happens and I watch everything crumble around my feet.
Hayden’s eyes are closed and he snores lightly. The room is bright from the sunlight that shines in through the windows. My eyes scan his face, taking in the innocence that isn’t usually visible. There’s something about his expression like this, almost as if his guard is down and there’s a way for me to slip inside. To get a look at the real Hayden King, not the facade he presents to the rest of the world.
Something shifted between us last night. Even though we both decided to keep this strictly physical, I can’t help but feel like we’ve transitioned into a deeper connection. He made it clear that I’m not allowed to see anyone else as long as this is going between us. That was never my intention anyway, but I needed him to know that the same applies to him.
Even if we don’t have a label, there still needs to be some type of exclusivity with us. I’ve never been good at sharing and I’m not about to put myself in that type of situation.
Thankfully, Hayden agreed. It’s hard to tell what is the truth or not with him and that’s mainly my fault. He’s never given me a reason to not trust him, but I’ve been burned before in the past. A scorned woman will always be on the defense, looking for a reason to run in the opposite direction.
I can’t let my emotions get the best of me and cloud my mind. There’s nothing wrong with enjoying a good time, even if it happens to be with the one guy I despise. Which is another problem I’m beginning to struggle with. Perhaps I’ve been too harsh on him. I marked him as guilty by association without even knowing him. I made a judgement and had refused to see anything else.
But with this shift… I’m currently questioning everything.
“What are you thinking about, pretty girl?” Hayden murmurs with his eyes still closed. He startles me as he speaks, since I was convinced he was still asleep. His eyelids lift, revealing his green eyes. “I want to know what is going on inside that beautiful mind.”
My breath catches in my throat as I feel completely exposed under his gaze. “It’s relatively boring in there,” I choke out, attempting to dismiss the way he makes my heart flutter.
“I refuse to believe that,” he whispers, his voice barely audible. “There’s not a single boring thing about you, Eden Finley.”
Hearing him whisper my name might be my favorite sound.
“How did you sleep?” he questions me, changing the subject as he throws me off again.
“Good. How about you?”
His lips curl upward. “Better than I normally do.”
My heart keeps trying to crawl into my throat and I keep swallowing it back down. We both fall into a silence that once would have been comfortable, but now under his watchful gaze, I feel entirely too exposed. Sliding out from under the covers, I grab my clothes and quickly put them on. As I turn back around to face Hayden, he’s still comfortable on the bed with a look of amusement on his face.
“Running away so soon?”
Clearing my throat, I shake my head as I move across the bedroom. “I need to go to the bathroom.”
Hayden nods, but falls silent, his gaze following me as I quickly shuffle out of the bedroom. As I walk out into the hall, I hear the sound of music coming from the kitchen and the smell of coffee. My stomach sinks as I realize that Winter must have come home early this morning.
Which means she knows that Hayden is here… again.
Thankfully, the bathroom is at the opposite end of the hall, so I’m able to slip inside without chancing a run-in with Winter. As I enter, I shut it and lock it before using the bathroom. After washing my hands, I make sure to brush my teeth twice before splashing my face a few times with cold water.
Grabbing a spare toothbrush from the cabinet, I set it on the counter for Hayden. I glance at myself in the mirror, wincing at how I look. I’m not usually one who is overly concerned with my looks, but I can’t help but feel slightly self-conscious knowing Hayden saw how I looked waking up. Pulling my hair on the top of my head, I wrap my hair tie around it and secure my locks in a messy bun.
It’s not much better than how it looked before, but it’s better than the tangled mess that was hanging around my face.
As I unlock the bathroom door, I slowly turn the knob and pull it open, careful to not make too much noise. Keeping my footsteps light, I go to step into the hall and gasp as I almost run into Winter.
She’s standing just outside the door, a smirk on her face as she leans against the wall. Her eyes meet mine and I notice the curiosity and mischief mixing in her irises.
“Good morning,” she says sweetly, offering me a genuine smile. “You look like you had quite the night.”
My breath catches in my throat, coming out as a strangled choking sound as I attempt to recover from her surprising me. “I didn’t think you would be home already.”
Winter shrugs, her face falling for a moment, but she’s quick to put her poker face back in place. “Travis and I had a little disagreement, so I left first thing in the morning. That shit is most definitely done.”
“Why?” I question her, the sympathy laced in my words. They really seemed like they were getting along and hitting things off. I’m surprised to hear she’s writing him off already. “What happened?”
“Nothing worth giving any more attention,” she admits, sighing. “He’s not the guy I thought he was. I mean, he’s still nice and a great guy, just not the one for me. We got into an argument over moving away from here. You know that I love Vermont, and he absolutely hates it. Girl, you know I would melt if I lived anywhere other than here. It’s just not worth putting any effort into building something with someone who’s going to leave in the end.”
I frown, her words hanging heavily in my head and the weight of them drags me back to where my mind keeps drifting to Hayden. “I completely get that. And good for you, I don’t blame you. I’m all for living in the moment, but life is too short to waste your time with someone you might not have a future with.”
The corners of Winters lips lift upward. “So, I’m guessing that you decided Hayden King is worth your time then?”
Pulling my lips in between my teeth, I bite down as I inhale deeply. Closing my eyes, I shake my head and swallow hard over the lump in my throat. As I lift my eyelids, I meet Winter’s gaze, which is now filled with concern. Her eyes bounce back and forth between mine, searching them for an answer.
“I don’t know what I’m doing with him,” I tell her, my voice barely audible. I don’t like admitting it out loud and instantly want to take the words back. “We talked last night. It’s nothing different than it was before. We’re just going with whatever it is and not getting involved with anyone else.”
“So, you’re exclusive to each other without any labels?” She shakes her head, flashing her white teeth at me as she pushes off the wall. “Let me know how long that lasts for you guys.” She chuckles. “It’s only a matter of time before he’s wifing you up.”
My eyes widen and my heart pounds rapidly in my chest. “Oh no, that is not happening.”
“I’m calling it now.”
“I hate to interrupt, but can I use the bathroom?” Hayden’s voice comes from the doorway of my bedroom as he pokes his head out. “I don’t mean to be graphic, but if I wait any longer, my bladder might explode.”
Winter’s face lights up as she chokes out a laugh. “I’ll leave the two of you to it.” She winks at me before turning around to head down the wall. She passes Hayden, flashing a smile at him. “Nice to see you, Hayden. And thanks for not leaving your clothes in my kitchen.”
I watch her disappear as Hayden strides toward me, fully dressed in the outfit he wore here last night. His eyes are bright and meet mine as he flashes his expensive smile at me.
“I left a toothbrush on the counter for you,” I tell him, stepping out of the way for him to go into the bathroom.
He tilts his head to the side, raising an eyebrow at me. “Shit, I have my own toothbrush here now? Damn, baby, I didn’t know we were moving that fast.”
Rolling my eyes, I brush past him, intentionally shoving my shoulder into his. “Shut up, King. It’s a toothbrush, not a ring.”
I hear him chuckling from behind me as he slips into the bathroom. Leaving him to it, I walk into my bedroom and sit down on the edge of my bed. An exasperated sigh slips from my lips as I fall onto my back with my hands over my head.
What the hell did I get myself into?
