I want to kiss Rowan until his lips are swollen and the sad look in his eyes is replaced by lust. Part of me wants to go back in time and protect that little boy who wanted nothing more than to dream and draw and be who he was without being attacked for it. I’d do anything to shield him from his father’s ugly words—a result of him hurting just as much as his sons.
I tighten my arms around his body. His ocean breeze scent washes over me as his head drops to the curve of my neck. He releases a shaky breath.
I’m not sure what this is but it feels right.
His heart pounds against his chest at an unsteady pace. “I didn’t tell you this for you to pity me.”
“Then why?”
“Because—” His voice trails off.
I give him the time he clearly needs. We do nothing but sit here together, basking in the comfort of each other’s company.
“You—because—” The fire conceals most of the redness in his face, but I catch the look of terror in his eyes.
I brush my lips across his, leaving behind the faintest kiss. “Because what?”
His heart pounds faster against my chest, the beat becoming alarmingly fast. “Because I like you. It’s scary as hell because you make me feel everything. And I know I’ll disappoint you. That I can’t promise much, but sometimes I think maybe I could. If I tried hard enough. If I found a way to make things right.”
My entire heart threatens to disintegrate in my chest from the heat spreading through my body. It’s the closest thing to a confession of love that I might get from him. And it’s a sign of hope.
That he might be in this for more than a casual fuck and a friendship with someone who treats him like a normal guy. That he really could be willing to make things right if he tries hard enough.
I rise up on my knees and press a kiss against Rowan’s lips. It’s meant to be one of comfort, but he doesn’t let me go. One of his hands wraps around my ponytail and tugs while the other grips onto my hips as he deepens the kiss. I moan, giving him better access to my mouth. Our tongues clash together, and blood pounds from my erratic heart to my ears.
Rowan’s lips don’t break away from mine as he gently maneuvers me so my back presses into the lush rug. He kisses me like he wants to brand me with his tongue. Like he needs to make sure I don’t forget him. I wouldn’t. Not in a hundred years or a million kisses later. There’s something about our connection that has me stumbling for more.
My head grows dizzy as he traces the shape of my body with the tip of his fingers. I move on from his lips and claim the area at his neck, sucking on the skin until I brand him.
He groans as he pulls away. With hungry eyes, he lifts the hem of my hoodie.
“Hmm. That’s unexpected.” His hoarse voice breaks through my heavy breathing.
Every ounce of blood rushes to my cheeks. “Ani packed it.”
“Damn. Way to wound my ego. I thought you picked this just for me.” He runs a finger across the obnoxious donuts design. I’m pretty sure this bra hasn’t seen the light of day since I was in high school. Pro: It makes my boobs look stellar. Con: It makes me look ridiculous. I can only hope he’s desperate enough to skip past reading the “Donut You Want Me” quote plastered across my ass cheeks. I’m not sure I could live that down.
“Do you plan on staring at me all night or are you going to get on with the show?”
His gaze remains focused on my chest. “I like the view.”
“I’d like mine better if your face was between my legs.”
His lips crash into mine. He rolls us over before I can catch a breath. One of his hands unhooks my bra while the other makes quick work of removing my hoodie. It takes him less than a moment to leave me topless and waiting for him.
He rises up, taking me with him. The area begging for him presses into his erection, and together we moan. His hands are greedy, running across my skin, creating goosebumps wherever they linger.
My head spins as my back hits the rug again. I can’t help it. Our lips break apart as I let out a laugh.
“If you’re laughing, there’s a problem here.”
“I can’t help it! Where did you learn to move like that?” Another giggle escapes me. I shut up as his body slides down mine.
I don’t get a warning. Nothing more than a sharp jolt of my nerves when his mouth latches onto my breast. His tongue swirls, teasing me until I’m moaning and thrashing beneath him. All I can do to ground myself is hold on to his hair and tug.
Rowan is a man with impeccable attention to detail. His mouth might be occupied but it doesn’t stop his hands from tracing my other nipple with the gentlest touch. It’s nothing but a whisper of a caress, making my skin burn for him. My entire body feels like he drenched me in lighter fluid and set me on fire.
I groan in frustration, and Rowan’s mouth detaches with a pop. Flames from the fireplace dance across his face, casting him in a golden glow. “Patience is a virtue.”
“Yeah, so is chastity, but you don’t see me practicing it.”
The corner of his mouth lifts. “I’m trying to be a gentleman. Foreplay is important.”
“You fucked me in a car only a couple of weeks ago. The gentleman card has been revoked.”
He laughs. It’s rich and deep, with enough of a rumble to make my toes curl.
“Stay here.” He rises, showing off his impressive bulge pressing against the zipper of his jeans. He undoes the button and zipper partially as he walks toward the kitchen. Drawers bang open and shut before he returns and drops a few condoms on the rug.
He tugs his T-shirt over his head, and I find my mouth dropping open. I want to trace my tongue across his rippling muscles, memorizing the curves and solid edges. His jeans find the same fate as his shirt on the floor, leaving him in nothing but a pair of skin-tight boxer briefs. My mouth waters at the outline of his cock.
I crawl over to him and trace his bulge with my palm. His head drops back while his fingers find the root of my hair as I uncover his erection and trace his length with the tip of my tongue. That earns me a groan and a tug of pain at my scalp.
“Prove how much you want me.”
Something about his words clangs inside my chest. After everything he shared, his words feel important. Like he half expects me to think of him as lesser-than because he went through life being unappreciated.
I make a mental promise to adore him. To show him that nothing he says could drive me away. I care about the man no one else knows. I even think I love him.
My cheeks burn as I take him in my mouth, one inch at a time. He pushes his dick farther into my mouth, and my clit throbs in response. He controls my body like he does a boardroom—with absolute confidence and a deadly restraint that I find intoxicating.
And I fucking love it.
He pushes more, and the edge of his nails scrape at my scalp. My moan comes out muffled, but it pulls his attention back toward me.
The tips of his fingers caress my cheek. “I’m not sure what I love more. The way you smile at me without abandon or the way you look with your swollen lips wrapped around my cock.”
He loves the way I smile.
My entire body flares to life, and I take back control. I use my hands to pump him farther down my throat, and the moan he lets out has me wanting to devour him until he releases his control.
I graze my teeth across the smooth skin, and his hips buck forward. Whatever dominance Rowan had over the situation snaps and his demon is unleashed. He fucks me like he hates me. Like I bring out all those feelings he can’t stand.
I absolutely love it. In fact, I want more. More of him and more of whatever this is.
The tiny pinpricks of pain barely register as his fingers tug at my hair. He uses me, marking my tongue with his arousal with every shove.
Our eyes connect, and the fierceness in his gaze sends another current of energy down my spine. I cup his balls in response and every muscle in his body trembles.
“Don’t you dare swallow.” He pumps in and out of my mouth over and over again. His shaft shines, and my eyes nearly roll into the back of my head.
He groans at the same time as his streams of hot cum hit the back of my throat. There’s so much, I’m convinced I’ll choke, but I take deep breaths and follow through with his request.
He withdraws his cock. “Open.” His thumb traces my bottom lip, smothering it with the mix of my saliva and his cum.
I stare him straight in the eyes as I show him what he wants.
“Fuck.” His gaze burns. “Swallow every last drop.”
My throat bobs as I follow his command.
He drops onto the rug and pushes me down onto my back. His lips return to mine, devouring them. He latches onto the band of my sweatpants and underwear at once, pulling away from my lips only to pull them down. The fire casts me in a golden glow.
“You’re perfect.” He traces the sensitive flesh on the inside of my thigh, making me feel revered. Special. Loved. I’ve never felt as beautiful in my life as I do right now.
He crawls over me. One of his hands slides down my body while his lips find mine again. He kisses me until I’m breathless. Until blood returns to his cock and pre-cum trickles down my stomach, leaving a path of his arousal.
I cup his growing erection, and he shudders above me. Rowan leaves no area of skin untouched or unkissed. It’s as if he wants to memorize the shape of me with his lips. His head rolls to the side when I trace my thumb across the bead of pre-cum and use it to help my hand slide easier across his shaft.
Rowan slides down some more until his mouth lines up with the area desperate for him. I jolt when he runs his tongue across me. Sparks scatter like fireworks across my skin, and my hands grab onto his thick locks. He chuckles against me, making the best vibration against my clit. I have an out-of-body experience as Rowan brings me to the brink of pleasure. I claw at him, trying to find something to secure me to Earth.
His lips find my clit and he sucks at the same time as one of his fingers slides into me. I’m granted no reprieve as Rowan propels another into me. My entire world turns technicolor. Colors burst behind my eyes as I explode around him. He chases my orgasm with a kiss, muffling up my moans like he wants to own them.
I’m trembling by the time I come down from the high. He slides his thumb across my arousal before tracing my bottom lip. “Taste how much you want me.”
My tongue darts out, licking my lip before teasing the tip of his thumb.
His eyes turn predatory as he flips me over and lifts me up on my knees, changing our direction so I face the city skyline. I’m not sure where to look. Him kneeling behind me or the bright lights shining in front of me.
The telltale rip of foil fills the silence. Heat pools within my lower stomach. My palms press into the thick rug, and I take a few deep breaths.
Rowan’s body presses into my back, enveloping me in his warmth. The heat of his breath sends my nerves into overdrive as he presses the tip of his cock into me.
He kisses the base of my spine. “You weren’t supposed to make me smile or laugh.” He nips at the edge of my ear before tracing my earrings with his finger. “You weren’t supposed to work your way under my skin like venom with no kind of antidote.” He slides only the tip into me. I push back, but he moves too, holding me hostage.
“And you were never supposed to make me want more.”
Heat blooms in my chest. I gasp as he thrusts his cock into me with one push. My body burns from the intrusion, and tears prick my eyes.
“But now it’s too late.” He smooths out my hair before wrapping it around his hand like a rope.
He tugs. “You’re mine.”
My arms tremble, barely holding me up. His words batter against my heart. Rowan usually might not say much, but tonight he won’t stop. Each word works its way down to my soul, fusing together the broken bits Lance left behind in his wake.
His hand clutching my hair tightens. “Say it.” He slams into me so hard, I slide forward on the rug, burning my knees.
I can only respond with a moan as he slides out of me to do the same thing all over again.
“Say you’re mine.” He slides out to the very tip, leaving me feeling empty.
“I’m yours,” I cry out. I’m rewarded with another rough thrust of his hips, but this time he brushes against my sensitive spot.
Pressure builds within me. The tingling starts at the top of my spine and reaches all the way to my toes. One of Rowan’s hands grips onto my hip while the other tugs on my hair, forcing me to look over my shoulder at him. The view in front of us is nothing compared to the one of Rowan coming undone as he thrusts into me over and over. I’m entranced, clawing at the rug when all I want to do is sink my fingers into his skin and never let go.
Forget sparks. Together, we’re a raging inferno so blistering, I’m scared that I’ll burst into flames if I touch him. It’s fitting, seeing how falling for Rowan is like playing with fire. One wrong move can consume me. Ruin me. Turn me into nothing but ashes in his wake.
But I want to risk falling in love anyway in the hopes that we create something beautiful together. Like a diamond built under pressure, with flaws that make us stunning. I want that kind of love with Rowan. The one that is as passionate as a wildfire and as long-lasting as a gem.
One of the hands gripping my hips moves onto my clit. His thumb presses against the sensitive flesh, shoving me into sweet oblivion. Rowan holds on to me as he plunges into the dark after me.
He’s perfect. We’re perfect. Everything is so perfect, I’m afraid of saying anything aloud. This is more than lust, but I refuse to be the first to admit it. No matter how tempted I am.
