I stare at the date on my watch, my heart heavy. Four weeks seemed like a lot of time, but in the end, it flew by. I tried so hard to be the husband Raya deserves, only to realize that I can’t be. My best isn’t enough — it never will be. Not for something as incredible as my wife.
“Is everything okay?”
I look up to find my little fairy standing in the doorway to our living room, her gaze filled with concern. She’s so fucking precious, and fuck, there’s no way I could ever be what she needs. We both know it.
“Yeah,” I murmur, my heart aching more with each beat. I offer her my hand, and she takes it with a smile. “There’s something I want to show you.”
Raya nods and entwines our fingers. She smiles at me in that way I love, and bitterness unfurls in my stomach. That’s probably what I’ll miss most — the intimacy between us. Her sweet smiles, the way she laughs at my silly jokes, and the way she sighs just before I kiss her.
It kills me to know someone else will find out that her feet are ticklish, and that she likes honey in her coffee but ginger in her tea. Another man will learn that running a finger down her spine makes her shiver, and that she hates mornings but loves sunsets.
He’ll have everything that used to be mine. My wife’s long hair brushing against his face in the morning, and his old college t-shirts covering her body. Her little whimpers when she doesn’t want to wake up just yet.
I tighten my grip on her hand as I lead her to our garage, my chest hollow. She’ll take my heart with her when she leaves, and I almost wish I never knew what it’s like to be hers, to be loved.
Raya gasps when she spots the yellow supercar I spent the last few weeks building, her name in small metal letters on the back. “I named it after you,” I murmur. “It’s fully solar powered, thanks to your dad’s generosity. He let me apply some of his ideas to this car for you, turning it into the first-ever solar supercar to ever exist. It’s thoroughly tested, but it isn’t a commercial vehicle.”
“Wow,” she whispers. Her eyes sparkle with such pride, and fuck if it doesn’t humble me. No one has ever believed in me the way she does, supported me quietly and without question. “This is incredible, Lex. I can’t believe you named it after me.”
“How could I not, when it’s your car?” I smile as I hold up the key, the handle shaped like a heart, the initials RW on it. Even the key is bespoke, but it’s the only hint of the Windsor name I’ve put on any aspect of the car.
She stares at me in disbelief. “You’re joking.”
I shake my head and gently cup her face, my throat tight. “All yours,” I murmur. The car. My heart. All of it.
Raya grins as she takes the keys from me, her eyes filled with reverence as she walks around it, assessing every last detail with wonder. She’s lavish with her praise, seemingly genuinely delighted by my gift.
“I hope you smile like that every time you drive it,” I murmur as she strokes the hood of the car with her fingers. “I hope it’ll make you think of me every once in a while.”
Her gaze snaps to mine, and she raises a brow, but she doesn’t say anything as she opens the door. “Join me,” she says, her voice softer now.
I nod and sit down in the passenger seat, my heart bleeding. Raya’s eyes roam over the interior, and all the while, I just watch her. “What’s this?” she asks, her finger tracing the small button with a Psi logo on it.
“It’s a direct line to Silas Sinclair. If you’re ever in trouble, press that. It’ll alert him, and it’ll have the full force of both his and the Windsors’ private security rushing toward you to ensure your safety, no matter where you might be.” I hesitate then, looking away. “I won’t be notified. It’s not a way to track you, and though this car is tied into our security measures just like all our other vehicles are, I don’t have access to the data. The button is just a safety measure.”
She nods, her expression unreadable. The way she’s looking at me is new, a mixture of understanding and wonder, all at once.
Raya’s hand trembles as she gently touches the button shaped like a fairy’s wings. “What does this do?”
My heart begins to race, and I turn to face her, our eyes locking. “It’ll bring you back to me…whenever you want, no matter where I might be. In the event I’m not in the country, it’ll take you back to this exact location, allowing you to bypass any security measures. The button itself is keyed to your thumb, so it wouldn’t work for anyone but you. I want you to know that you’ll always have every right to me. I’ll always be yours. I’ll always be waiting.”
My wife studies me, and then she presses the button. “Little Fairy Protocol activated,” Pippy says. “I am locating Lexington Windsor now, Raya,” she adds, starting the car. “As soon as his location has been pinpointed, I will drive you to him. Please sit back and wear your seatbelt.”
“She called me Raya. Not Mrs. Windsor.”
I nod as I glance at her empty ring finger. “Yeah, I fixed that for you.”
“Lexington Windsor appears to be with you, Raya. As such, I cannot drive you to him. I do apologize. Deactivating Little Fairy Protocol.”
I grab her hand and sigh, my thumb brushing over where her ring used to be. “This car contains all the research and materials you’ll need to revolutionize the industry, to make all your wildest dreams come true. You don’t need me for any of it, Raya. I won’t use my company, my knowledge, or even my money to control you, to forcibly keep you by my side. It’s not what I want. Not anymore.”
“Lex,” she whispers. “What are you saying?”
My thumb brushes over my wedding ring, and I force a smile for her. “Our time is up, little fairy. You gave me four weeks to prove to you that I can be the husband you need, and I tried, baby. But with each attempt, it only became clearer that I’m not the one for you. You deserve real love — a coincidental meeting, a dinner date that doesn’t end up in the papers. You deserve a man without demons that compete with you for his attention… someone that isn’t broken.”
I hesitate, my hands shaking as I reach for her dashboard and take out the papers I stored in there. My eyes fall closed briefly before I hand them to her, wishing with all my might things could’ve been different. “I signed them, Raya. I’m sorry for taking so long to accept what you already knew. I love you, little fairy, but you’re right. Love isn’t the problem.”
Raya stares at the papers, and then she looks up at me, her gaze unwavering. “What if I don’t want coincidental meetings? What if I want spilled shots and rounds of truth and dare? What if I want to wear wigs and mess with the press? What if I want to be the one you fight for, the one that stands by your side as you continue to heal and grow? What if you’re all I want, Lexington, flaws and all?”
I stare at her in disbelief, and Raya smiles at me as she cups my face. “I love you, Lex. Every single thing about you, but especially the way you kept your word, the way you tried not just to make amends, but to change for the better, forever. You say I deserve true love, but if that isn’t true love, what is? I love you, but more importantly, I choose you — forever and always. Will you let me? Let me choose you, Lex.”
She smiles when I can’t quite find the right words to say. My gaze roams over her as I try to comprehend what she’s saying. She wants me? Despite everything? “Just say yes,” she whispers.
“Yes,” I reply, my voice breaking. “Choose me, Raya. Please, choose me.”
She brushes the back of her fingers over my jaw and nods. “I do. I always will. Every single day, Lex. Forever and always.”
