about?” Rose traces her fingertip absentmindedly around the compass on my chest as we lie in her bed, her cradled in the crook of my arm.
I allow my eyes to fall closed as I press my lips to her forehead and breathe in her scent.
Vanilla and petals.
For the rest of my life, I swear the scent of her will calm me like nothing else.
Even when my head feels like it could explode with the amount of shit that’s swarming around inside it.
“I’m thinking about where I’m going to take you.”
“You mean on vacation?” She lifts her head and the delight in her eyes makes my heart pang with guilt. I wish I could give it to her now. Give her everything. Hell, I wish we were there now, and this was all over. All in the past.
Forty-eight hours.
Two days.
“Yeah.” I chuckle as she grins and grabs either side of my face and plants an excited kiss on my lips.
“I can’t wait. Where will we go? Will it be hot? Will I need a new bathing suit?”
“No.”
“No?”
Her face falls briefly, and I reach out to run the pad of my thumb over her pouty bottom lip.
“You can swim naked. I intend on you being naked the entire time we’re there.”
Her eyes light up again before she places her head back into my chest and sighs happily. “I can’t wait. Our first vacation together.”
She takes one of my hands in hers and threads her fingers through mine, holding our entwined palms in front of her face. “I’ve got a surprise for you, too. Although I shouldn’t tell you about it. It’s not ready yet, I’ve only just started working on it.”
“Does it involve you being naked? Because I know I’ll love it if that’s the case.”
“Dax!”
I smile and tighten the grip of my arm around her. Hearing her happy is like food for my soul. Or like a beam of sunlight on the darkened parts. Warming up the cold corners that I thought were beyond redemption.
“When do I get this surprise?” I dip my nose into her hair and just rest there, contentment washing over me for the first time in a long while.
It’s like I’m finally starting to breathe again.
So close.
“I don’t know. A day. Maybe two.” She brings our joined hands to her lips and kisses my knuckles one by one. “It’ll be worth the wait. I hope.”
Two days.
My mouth goes dry, the sliver of ease from moments ago disappearing once again. I can’t have it yet. Not until this is all done.
Until it’s over.
“Two days,” I murmur, kissing her hair. “In two days, I’ll have a gift for you as well.”
She stops stroking my chest and tilts her face toward me, her light blue eyes finding mine.
She really is beautiful. Pure and good. Too good for me, yet here we are. She wants me, and I want her. God, do I want her. I’ve never wanted anything more. And from the past few years, that’s saying something. In a few short months, she’s become everything to me. The reason I want to move forward. The reason I want to leave the past behind.
The reason I need two more days.
“You will?” She looks at me, and I swear if I were a crying man, I would well up at the adoration and trust in her eyes.
I have to be worthy of her. I have to do this. Close the door so that we can have a fresh start. It’s the least she deserves.
I extract my hand from hers and cup the side of her face, tracing my thumb over her cheek.
“You make me want to be a better man, Rose. I thought I knew what I wanted. Then you came along. Give me two days. Then our future begins. We both leave our past behind. Give me that time. Please.”
She nods once. “Okay.”
Okay.
Just like that. She doesn’t ask for anything more. She just smiles softly at me and angles her face toward me as I hold her chin and bring my lips to hers.
I kiss her, savoring every sigh from her as she kisses me back and strokes my neck. Then I roll on top of her, wrapping her legs around my waist.
“Hold on to me, Sunbeam,” I breathe against her lips as I sink inside her.
She wraps her arms around my neck, her eyes holding mine as I hold her tightly in my arms and pump into her slowly, over and over again.
Our breath mixes in the fraction of an inch between our lips, and time becomes immeasurable. It’s just me and her. Two souls, so close to being free together. Both tainted and stained by lies and the shadows of our past. But both gripping so tightly on to the other, never wanting to let go in case it all ends. In case it was all a cruel trick.
“Dax,” Rose whimpers as I slide deep inside her again, setting her body shuddering beneath me.
I struggle to hold back the swell of pleasure threatening to burst out of me at the way my name sounds on her lips.
She blinks up at me and cups my face, searching my eyes as I hold her tight and thrust into her.
Yes… two souls… both with a promise for the other.
A promise of every sunrise for infinity.
“You’re everything,” I whisper, catching her lips in mine as her first orgasm rolls through her and she moans my name.
Then I come, groaning with a deepened kiss as I fill her. The strength of the emotion churning up my chest makes my eyes water, and I grip Rose tight as I empty everything I have deep inside her.
“Sunbeam,” I murmur, kissing her over and over. Her cheeks, her lips, her eyelids, her neck.
Anywhere and everywhere my lips reach.
I keep my body inside hers, kissing her and stroking her face, running my hands through her hair, until my cock starts swelling again.
“Dax.”
Her voice melts my last reserve until I’m painfully hard inside her again. I hold her eyes, and she nods.
Then we make love again.
And again.
And again.
I never leave her body.
I don’t ever want to leave her.
The thought alone is enough to destroy me.
I make love to Rose all night long, hoping my body conveys the words I can’t say to her yet.
But soon I will.
Our bodies are a tangled, sweaty mess as the sun’s first early morning rays shine through the cottage’s small window.
“You’re close. I can feel it. Come. Come for me,” I encourage as I drive inside her again, dragging my piercing over her G-spot on the outward thrust, the way she loves.
Her cheeks flush as she lets go, allowing another orgasm to steal the final threads of energy she’s been holding on to.
Her eyelids fall low in exhaustion as she fights to keep her eyes on me. But she still manages to squeeze me, hugging me tight inside her wet heat. And it’s the final push I need to join her. I hold her neck, stroking her pulse as pleasure surges through me, and I spill inside her again. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve poured myself into her tonight.
Each time has stolen my breath more than the last.
Her eyes flutter closed, losing the battle.
One day to go.
“Everything okay?” Logan looks at my white knuckles as I sit back in my office chair, trying to concentrate on the latest update he’s giving me.
“Yeah. Fine.” I uncurl my fist that’s on top of the desk and take a slow deep breath in.
“You sure you want to do it, then?”
“Yeah, of course,” I mutter, nodding.
Logan’s been talking about this guy, who’s been anchoring after privately hiring the estate grounds for the day to hold his wedding. I was against it for a long time. But he’s pulled out the big guns and is offering an eye-watering amount. Enough to cover all the lost revenue from when I was inside and the business suffered. It’s enough for the entire staff to retire.
An obscene amount.
But the truth is, I don’t care about the money.
It was when Logan told me that the guy’s fiancée had dreamed of this place since she was a little girl that did it.
The guy said he didn’t give a fuck where he married her, as long as he did. But her heart is set on the estate for some reason, and he wants her to be happy.
Meeting Rose has turned me into a sap. Because if there was something that would make her dreams come true, but I couldn’t get it for her… it would eat away at me.
I told Logan to tell the guy yes.
Spread a little fucking light and positivity.
“All right. I’ll let you know what date they want. We can insist on a premium if it’s peak time.”
“Whatever they want. Just let them pick.”
Logan looks at me like I’ve grown two heads. “O-kay. You sure you’re all right?”
“Never better.” I put my hands onto my thighs beneath my desk and flex them.
It’s the truth. Sort of. I am never better. Because soon this shit I’ve been chained to will all be finished. But tomorrow when it’s all done and over… That’s when I will truly be never better. When I can look into Rose’s trusting eyes and know that I never have to leave her at night again. Never have to crawl back into bed in the early hours of the morning and miss her falling asleep in my arms. Never have to lie to everyone.
And Julian Young will finally be where he belongs.
Dead, or behind bars.
Either way, I don’t care. As long as he’s gone.
“Fine.” Logan stands, sensing he won’t get anything more out of me. “I’ll call him. He’s going to be happy. I told the fucker there wasn’t a hope in hell.”
“Tell him to think of it as a silver lining. Because the amount he’s paying, he could buy the whole fucking sky as well as hell.”
Logan smirks as he heads toward the door. “All right, Boss. Catch you later.”
I stand and walk over to the window. The cottage is sitting behind the treeline, but I can see it from here and make out the front door.
I told Rose I want us to sleep there again tonight. After I get back, that is. It seems right that the first morning we wake up together with it all behind us will be in the cottage. My mind is already full of all the ways I want to show her what she means to me. Starting with in front of the mirror again. But this time, I won’t be saying infinity. I’ll be using other words. Ones I’ve never said to anyone before in my life.
After tonight, it will be done. Time to start over. Time to tell Rose how I really feel.
Time to fucking live again.
