“But we did that book last time,” Alex whines from his perch at the foot of the bed as I tuck Amanda in.
“Rules are rules.” I remind them with a smile on my face, though I wouldn’t mind hearing something other than Rumpelstiltskin. It’s creepy as hell, but the little girl loves it.
“Yeah. Rules are rules,” Amanda sing-songs, making me hold back a giggle.
I’m about to suggest something a little more Disney and a little less Brothers Grimm when a deep masculine voice has my entire body tingling.
“Isn’t that a little too dark for her?” Austin’s green eyes are focused on mine, threatening to dig up all of my hidden secrets, airing them one by one as I’m rendered helpless and watching.
Snap. The. Fuck. Out. Blinking myself free from the fog this man puts me in, I find my words and use them. “For your information, she’d already read it before my arrival. Who was I to deny her a perfectly appropriate bedtime story?”
I’m hearing myself speak, but even as the words come out, I know they’re bullshit. The story at the end is especially gruesome, but she swore up and down Pen read it to her on the regular, and Alex confirmed.
Internally cringing, I doubt my skills as a nanny. Maybe the story is too much for a girl who’s been through so much trauma like she has. Gah, have I been damaging her tiny mental psyche with my story time?
If Austin agrees with my internal struggle, he doesn’t comment. He simply walks to the other side of the bed and sits, making the queen-sized mattress feel infinitely smaller. Pulling an arm behind Amanda’s back, he lowers down and places a kiss on the crown of her head. “How about Daddy tells you a story of a beautiful princess. One who lived on a very beautiful ranch.”
Amanda rolls her eyes as she scoffs, the action pulling a giggle from my lips. “Daddy, you’re talking about me, aren’t you?”
Austin is visibly trying to hold back from laughing, but it doesn’t stop his shoulders from shaking. “Of course not, sweetie.”
With a raised brow, Amanda pulls the large book from my hands and deftly opens it to the right page before shoving it onto her dad’s lap, putting him on the spot. “I still want Rumpelstiltskin.”
Oh my god, I’m internally laughing my ass off. Let’s see you deny her the story, mister. Not so easy, is it?
I have the biggest smile on my face as I turn to leave. “I’ll give y’all some privacy since you have story time covered.”
Taking this as my cue to exit, I turn my body, but my feet haven’t even fully hit the floor when Austin’s demand has me halting in place.
“Stay.” One word. It’s all it takes, and my body complies.
Slowly turning back, I pin him with my covert death glare, trying not to frighten the kids but wanting to let him know he needs to back the fuck off with those commands.
I’m not one who takes kindly to being bossed around, but for some reason, his one-word commands have me heeling like Lassie. Something I don’t like or need.
A man who can pull that sort of visceral reaction from me is a man I can’t be around. I’m about to tell him as much when he cuts me off with the unexpected.
“Please, Anaya. Stay.”
Lord Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. My ovaries just exploded. This man that’s all hard edges and steel is looking at me with so much vulnerability, it’s making my insides flutter. How can he melt me into a puddle of goo with just three little words?
Instead of verbally responding—because let’s be honest, I don’t trust myself with full sentences—I simply nod and turn back toward the center of the bed.
Just then, Amanda makes a noise of contentment as she snuggles into the crook of her dad’s embrace, pulling my attention to what really matters. The kids.
Austin clears his throat and is about to read when Amanda reaches over and pulls my hand into hers, bringing me a fraction closer and causing my arm to rest next to her father’s.
This brief touch sends shivers up my arm and butterflies fluttering in my chest, enveloping me in warmth. Though soon enough, the pang of reality douses that kindling.
I’m a thief. This moment doesn’t belong to me, it belongs to their mother. It should be her in this room with these beautiful children and this beautiful man.
But does this realization stop me from wanting it? Hell no.
As Austin’s words fill the room, I let myself soak in this stolen moment. Maybe it’s selfish, but I want it and I’m going to let myself have it—even if just this once.
Lost in the feeling, I let myself freefall into this simple pleasure, committing every second to memory and enjoying it for what it is, fleeting.
“DONE,” I whisper as I click the send button on Mom’s computer.
I’m in her office, submitting my very last final, making it so that I’m now officially done with my undergraduate career. Luckily, I only had one exam to go when I left Ray in the dust, meaning I only had one professor to persuade into letting me submit my exam online.
Not only was he understanding, but he also gave me an extension. I’m shutting down the computer, ready to celebrate with a latte when the door swings open and Jack’s towering frame walks through.
“Anaya. Mary said I would find you here. Can I have a moment?”
“Yes. Of course.” I nervously sit back down, hoping he isn’t mad that I’d let mom watch the kids while I sent my email.
“Wipe that look off your face. This isn’t that serious.”
I let out a small breath of relief, but don’t let my guard down completely. “What is this about, then?”
“As you saw, Austin is home and back in the picture. Typically, it’s the children’s parents that would arrange for childcare, but since I’m still technically their guardian, the decision is still mine. At least until we get the legalities all worked out with Austin’s estate.”
“Okay. What does that mean for me?” I blink, my chest heating and stomach churning. It’s no secret that Austin isn’t my biggest fan.
“Well, initially we’d discussed you staying until we brought Pen home, but that hadn’t factored in Austin’s presence or his state of mind. He’s not usually so…”
“Cranky?” I offer, the secret moniker rolling off my tongue like second nature.
Jack chuckles while his long fingers absently rub at his stubble. “That’s one word for it. Anyway, I don’t want to put you out, and I know that he’s going to be difficult, but it would mean a lot if you could stick around until we get Pen home and guardianship transferred. Is that something you’d be willing to do still?”
I know what I want to say, but something holds me back, my brain wandering to how deep Austin’s trauma goes. “What exactly did he go through? I mean, I know it’s probably not my place to ask, but I’d like to know what I’d be facing.”
Jack lets out a long breath before tilting his head back and facing the ceiling. “A lot. He’s been through a lot.” Finally dropping his face to mine, he stares me dead in the eyes. “To summarize it, he’s seen and done things no man should ever do. And to make matters worse, he had to spend two weeks wandering the Mexican desert without food and water, injured as all get out.”
My mouth is hanging open now, no words escaping it. I’m stunned into silence. I mean, I knew they’d been kidnapped, but what does he mean with ‘done things no man should do’?
“Anaya. I know that’s a lot to take in, but I need an answer. If you’re not okay with that, then I need to make plans for a replacement.”
His words bring me back to the here and now, sending a lead ball straight to my stomach. Replacement? Yeah, no. That’s not going to happen. Not if I can help it.
I’ve grown attached to the kids. There’s no way I’d let this take me from them. Besides, I’m not ready to face Ray.
A wave of nausea hits me and nodding is all I can do to answer, staving off the urge to hurl all over the desk.
“Does that nod mean you’ll stay?” Jack raises a brow, the curiosity in his eyes evident.
“Yes. That’s a yes, I’ll stay.” I smile and push back the bile that’s threatening to destroy Mom’s desk.
No matter what Austin has done in the past, I’m pretty damn sure it was warranted. And now that I’ve talked to Jack, I can understand a little more of the why behind his crabby behavior.
I still don’t like it, but at least now I know enough to empathize a little. Hopefully that’s enough to keep me from strangling him to death.
“Okay. Great. That’s great news. I’ll get out of your hair.” Jack claps his hands together once, a huge smile gracing his ruggedly handsome face. “Oh, and congrats on your last final. Your mom told me you’re now officially done with school.”
I smile and nod as the eldest Crown walks through the threshold, his backside just as pretty as the front.
There’s no denying that all of the Crown men are drop dead gorgeous. But there’s just something different about Austin. The rest of the brothers have a light complexion and dirty blond hair, but Austin has this deep tan and dark hair that makes me swoon every time I see him. Unfortunately for me, the hottest brother is also the crankiest. And if that weren’t enough, he’s the father to the kids under my care.
