During breakfast the following day I keep to myself and barely touch my food.
Usually, I would participate in Knox’s conversations, but today, I can’t even look him in the eye.
Not after what I remembered yesterday.
Dad and Agnus are talking about stocks and the FTSE 100. Knox gave up on anyone hearing him out, so he just plays around with Teal’s food. She kicks him under the table, the sound echoing in the dining room. He howls as if he’s being murdered.
I wonder if he screamed when Ma cut his knee back then.
Don’t.
If I allow those dark thoughts to sweep over me, I won’t be able to function. I would stay up all night, hugging my knees to my chest, like I did last night.
I continue lowering my head so neither Teal nor Knox can see my heated cheeks or the pricking of my skin.
Can the earth open up and swallow me?
What would it be like if Aiden was sitting beside me right now? For one, he wouldn’t feel ashamed. For two, he would know how to deal with this situation.
Damn you, mind. Aren’t we supposed to block him out?
It’s only been three days since I last saw him. Meaning, he and his fucking engagement are fresh in my mind.
Nope, brain. That’s not how it works. Block him out. Block him the fuck out.
“We’ll be in my office if you need anything, princess.” Dad and Agnus stand.
I was too caught up in a conversation with my brain to notice they stopped talking.
Dad smiles down at me. “Let’s go for horse riding afterwards.”
“I don’t know how to ride a horse.”
“You do.” He smiles. “We’ll just have to refresh your memories.”
It’s only after he and Agnus disappear at the top of the stairs that I recall I’m at the table with Knox and Teal.
Alone.
Oh, God. What the hell am I supposed to do now?
Run? No, that would be rude.
Hide under the table? That’d be crazy.
I slap a generous amount of jam on my toast and take my time shaping it like I’m an artist or something. At this point, I would do anything to escape their company, but I don’t trust my legs enough to carry me out of here.
“Are you okay?” Knox bites into a scone. “You’ve been silent since last night’s dinner.”
Teal stares at me from underneath her long, thick lashes but says nothing.
You’re an adult. Own up to it, dammit.
Taking a deep, shaky breath, I finally lift my head, still clutching the toast.
Two pairs of eyes watch me closely. Hazel eyes and midnight eyes.
That’s why both Knox and Teal looked so familiar when I first met them — or met them again.
“I remember meeting you years ago.” My voice is heavy with clogged emotions. I can barely breathe, let alone talk. “I’m sorry for what Ma did. I-I’m so sorry.”
“Finally.” Knox taps his chest. “I was hurt when you didn’t remember me. It hit me right in the tiny white space in my heart.”
“Your apology means shit to me,” Teal speaks casually as she sips her coffee. “It doesn’t give me back what I lost.”
I wince.
“You sound like a bitch, T,” Knox says with nonchalance like it’s a normal occurrence. “There’s something you need to know about Teal, Ellie. She has a weird way of expressing herself. Okay, now, T. Repeat that after thinking about the words.”
“Right. Okay.” She lifts her head, a crease etching between her brows. “I meant you don’t need to apologise for something you didn’t do.”
“See?” Knox grins. “That wasn’t too hard, was it?”
Teal isn’t focused on him, though. Her entire attention falls on me and I feel like a mouse stalked by a cat.
That’s… weird.
“Although you do look so much like that woman, I keep thinking about stabbing you to death with a fork while you sleep.” She takes her coffee and disappears around the corner.
“Haha, very funny.” Knox offers me a lopsided smile. “She’s kidding… mostly.”
My shoulders slouch. “She’s right, I’m a carbon copy of my mother. How can you be so easy going about that, Knox?”
“Because you’re not her. I’m going to be honest, the day of the pool’s incident, I was the one who lifted you when you fell to your knees in the car park. I think you were so out of it, you didn’t notice me. I was also so confused, thinking that woman had returned. Imagine my bloody shock! So anyway, I followed you and I found you floating in that pool.” He runs a hand at the back of his head. “For a second, I did contemplate leaving you there, but I didn’t because I knew you weren’t her. The more time I spent with you, the more I was positive you weren’t her. Give T some time, and she’ll come to the same conclusion.”
“Thank you, Knox.” I fight the tears in my voice.
“No. Thank you. Ted was the first toy Teal and I received. Dad says it was your favourite. Children don’t give their favourite toys to anyone. Hell, I don’t give away my things now either.”
I swallow. “It was nothing.”
“It was something for both of us. T and I were the kind of children who weren’t allowed hope, but you gave it to us in the form of Ted.” He smirks. “We took great care of it, by the way.”
“Are you and Teal siblings?”
He nods. “Twins.”
“Twins?”
“Fraternal.” He winks. “I got all the looks.”
I’ll have to disagree with that. Although Knox is handsome, Teal has a unique beauty that’s rare to find; both innocent and hard. Adorable and dangerous.
“We were street kids,” Knox continues. “We ran away from a druggie mother who was about to whore us out for money and all that jazz.”
I gulp at the image and drop the toast. Not that I ever thought about eating it in the first place. “How about your father?”
“Never knew him. Dad is the only father we had.”
My heart warms as if I were thrust from a dark icy winter night straight into a summer day. Dad took two lost children and gave them a home.
“Did he take you in since the basement incident?”
He nods. “We used to live in a separate home with Agnus, but Dad came by all the time. After the fire, we moved in with him.”
“But he was in a coma.”
“He was still Dad even while he was sleeping.”
Everything that Knox told me about his father before makes sense now. He never stopped considering Dad his father even after he was in a coma with a slim chance of ever waking up again.
“Thank you for being there for him when he needed you.”
“Hey, don’t go all sappy on me. He’s my dad, too.” Challenge sparks in his eyes. “And I’m his favourite.”
I smile and take my first real bite of food this morning. Knox and I talk about the times he stopped himself from finding me. Apparently, Agnus didn’t like for us to get in touch without Dad in the picture.
We chat for a bit when a commotion sounds from the front door. I stand and Knox comes to my side. We both frown in confusion as we follow the source.
The butler talks to someone at the door. I barely manage to take a step forward when I’m hugged out of nowhere.
Nina Ricci’s perfume clogs my nostrils as slim arms hold me so close, it’s nearly suffocating.
“Elsie,” she cries in my neck. “Oh my God, you’re all right. You’re going to be all right, hon.”
“Aunt?”
“I’m here. Aunt is here.” She pulls back to search my face with frantic eyes. “Are you okay? Are you hurt? Have you been eating well?”
“I’m fine, Aunt.”
“Calm down, Blair.” Uncle’s voice is as soothing as I remember. He holds my backpack and stands with stone calm by the entrance.
I smile faintly at him.
I’m such a horrible person. It’s been two days since I told them I’d come home, but I disappeared without a word.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper to him.
Even though I’m still mad about how they hid the truth for a decade and actively forbade me from searching for it, Aunt and Uncle are still my parents. One way or another.
“Let’s go home, hon.” Aunt digs her nails into my arm. “Let’s leave this place behind.”
“Absolutely not.” Dad’s voice echoes from behind me like thunder, strong and non-negotiable. He stands beside me and addresses Aunt, “You’re welcome to stay here all you like, but Elsa isn’t going anywhere.”
Both Aunt and Uncle freeze, watching him as if he’s a ghost — which he is in some way.
I can’t say I blame them. My reaction was the same when I first saw him.
“You are alive,” Uncle whispers.
“I don’t care whether you’re alive or not,” Aunt snarls. “Elsa is my adoptive daughter.”
“Those papers can be annulled any time now that her real father is alive.”
Aunt’s lips tremble, but she visibly straightens and guards her cool. “I won’t leave Elsa with you so you’ll destroy her like you destroyed Abigail.”
“You of all people know Abigail was unwell way before I married her.” He takes a menacing step forward. “I was there for her until the end, but where were you, Blair?”
Aunt flinches as if he slapped her.
This is the side of Dad I never get to see; ruthless and merciless.
She touches the side of her neck. “Elsa, let’s go, hon.”
Somewhere deep inside, I miss Aunt and Uncle, and I do feel sorry for her — for her past, and her abusive father.
It must’ve cost her a lot to come to Birmingham when she associates this place with trauma. She’s been slightly shaking since she hugged me, and I’m sure it has to do with this place as much as with me.
A few months ago, I would’ve taken her hand and followed her without question.
However, that was the Elsa of the past.
I gently pull my hand from her. “I’m staying.”
Uncle briefly closes his eyes with a pained expression.
Aunt’s mouth opens and closes like a fish. “W-what?”
“I’ll stay with Dad.” I swallow. “I’ll call and visit. I promise.”
“Is that your final decision, pumpkin?” Uncle asks with a note of sadness.
I nod once.
He passes me my backpack. “Your phone and necessities are in here.”
“Thank you.”
“No. No, Elsie. Don’t do this.” Aunt grabs me by both my arms like a dying woman holding onto her last breath. “You can’t leave us.”
“I’m not leaving you, Aunt. I’ll visit.”
A sob catches in her throat as Uncle pulls her back.
I watch them as Uncle drags a numb Aunt towards his car. A tear threatens to fall free, but I seal it in. I won’t cry.
I will not cry.
Dad holds me to him by the shoulder and Knox — who has been watching the entire scene silently — smiles.
I smile back with so much internal peace.
Aunt and Uncle aren’t my only family.
