Dangerous love.
He entered nearly throwing the car keys in the bowl and made his way towards her room.
He marched inside without knocking to find it empty.
He was going to exit when he heard the bathroom tap running.
He tried opening the bathroom door but it was locked.
‘Saph come out right now!’
He shouted knocking on the door.
He again tried but no response.
He banged on the door calling her name but there was again no response.
He made his way down the stairs and opened the drawer to get the spare key of the bathroom.
Opening the door he entered to find her no where.
He looked around and his eyes fell on the shadow behind the curtain.
He pulled the curtain away to take a step back.
There she was lying inside the bathtub still wearing her white dress.
A bottle of vine in her hands and the front of her dress was all red from the vine stains.
Water filled the bath tub and her clothes and hair were all drenched in it.
Her eyes were closed but she was breathing just fine.
He closed the tap and silence followed.
‘Sapphire what the Fu** are you doing?’
He asked making her open her eyes suddenly and look at him in shock.
‘Andro….I….was…..I….was just ….’
‘Just come out after getting cleaned up…you and this bathroom stinks of alcohol’
He waited on her bed as she came out wearing a loose t shirt and a pajama.
She held on to the door of the bathroom as she tried to balance herself.
She couldn’t even stand how did he expect her to talk in a civilized manner.
He thought as he stood up and made his way towards her.
Grabbing her from her neck harshly he tilted her face up to look into her eyes.
Her eyes were red like she had opened her eyes underwater for too long.
Like the ones we get when soap brings tears in our eyes.
‘Care to explain what made you do it?’
He asked determined to set her mind straight and make her realise her mistake.
She silently kept staring at him and when he thought she wouldn’t answer she spoke
‘Your love’
He looked down and smiled a wicked smile
Moving his head from one side to another.
Like he was disappointed in her answer.
Next she knows his grip on her hair tightened and he pushed her back blocking her shivering frame between him and the wall.
‘You fuck*** have the guts to tell this to me after you nearly killed a person and made a laughing stock of me in front of the entire world…’
‘You know what they are calling me? Huh?’
Her forehead creased in pain as he applied more pressure.
‘A psycho lover who couldn’t stop his bitches paws from scratching the governor’s daughter!’
‘But these things don’t matter….my reputation doesn’t matter!! My family doesn’t matter!! My business doesn’t matter because only you mattered dammit!! Only you!!!’
His eyes softened and he left her making her drop to the ground.
He turned his back on her and grabbed his hair in frustration to stop himself.
Her cries could be heard in background and today they were irritating him.
‘Now stop crying!! I haven’t even started with you’
‘Andro ….please…I couldn’t control myself….she said you will choose her…’
‘Saph how many times ?? Huh how many fuc*** times do I have to tell you that I only love you!! Haven’t I said it hundred times before…it doesn’t matter what other girls say…. don’t you believe me when I tell you!!!”
‘No…I…know….I….just can’t believe that you….you can love someone like me….I mean I am-‘
He turned around and pulled her up placing her on the bed.
‘Yes I love you..but the Saph I saw today….I can’t say the same for her….my Saph would never curse …my Saph would never hurt a fly….my Saph would never doubt my love….and my Saph would never humiliate me….’
‘Your Saph died….’
She whispered not meeting his eyes.
An unknown fire had started inside her .
‘What….what did you say?’
He asked afraid and surprised at the same time.
‘I said she died the second you left her!! She died screaming she is innocent!!she died the second those monsters tried to rape her!! She died living on streets feeding on left overs!! She died pleading you to come back!! She died screaming and begging you that she loved you !!’
Her angry eyes dared him to say that she was lying.
They dared him to deny the truth.
He stood frozen.
Raping?? She never mentioned about it in her diary.
How many more secrets did this girl lived with.
‘Gone is you dear Saph….this is the only thing left of me…you either take it or throw me out like before.
I swear I won’t show you my cursed face again!’
He moved towards her.
Gone was the anger in his eyes and instead desperation got ignited.
He wanted to hug her…kiss her…hold her very badly…
She moved back refusing to accept his sympathy.
She didn’t wanted sympathy.
She hated it.
Before she could protest he pulled her in his arms and inhaled her heavenly fragrance which calmed him down.
She refused to reciprocate as he refused to let go.
He pulled back staring into her eyes
‘Did you tried to sink in the bath tub?’
He asked afraid to listen to her answer.
She looked shocked
Her eyes got as big as saucers and all her movements stilled.
‘No..I…was ….ju-‘
‘The Truth Saph..tell me the truth….’
She looked anywhere but at him looking nervous and scared
‘Yes…I…I wanted to feel what I did to her..I wanted to feel the pain I caused her by pushing her into the pool…..I wanted to punish myself…’
He closed his eyes afraid and devastated to listen to her answer.
What doctor said was happening.
The first day he told him that she could have suicidal thoughts and he ignored his warning thinking that she was recovering.
‘Listen Saph .. don’t you ever do that again…no matter what happens you will never try to hurt yourself…. promise…??’
‘Promise’
She nodded and he again engulfed her in loving hug.
He kissed her forehead and whispered again and again.
‘I love you Saph…I love you soo much.’
He held her till she was asleep in his lap as he patted her head and stroked her cheeks.
He still had to change his clothes…placing her head on the pillow he decided to leave when she held his hand…
‘I am sorry for today Andro…I am so sorry….please forgive me.’
He placed a kiss on her knuckles and left without saying a word.
She got her answer by his actions.
He did forgave her.
But could she forgive herself.
She would never.
She hated her illness.
She hated herself.
And no matter what promises she makes to him.
She will always hate herself for what she did today.
She knew her love for him was taking a nasty turn.
It was making her loose the little insanity she had.
It was making her crazy in love.
And she herself was afraid of her love for him.
Because it had crossed all boundaries and logics.
It relied on instincts.
And that’s why it was a dangerous love.
