Chasing Love: Chapter 45


This weekend leaves me questioning everything I believe in, everything I said I wouldn’t fall for again.

I know I said nothing’s off-limits, but I meant sexually. This other attachment which sort of fell into place I didn’t expect that—the hand holding, the tender kissing, stroking of the hair-type gestures, and the constant questions about marriage.

It terrifies me.

I was drunk when he put that ring on my finger, and I was happy to play along with the game, but somewhere in the past few hours it’s gone from fantasy to reality.

He asks me if the problem is that I don’t trust him. Do I? Of course, he can have anyone he wants, and anyone who has a pussy wants him. My insecurities are getting the better of me and I don’t like it one bit.

As the magic show plays in the background I stand there dazed, trying to put my thoughts together. My emotions are getting the better of me, and this isn’t the place to breakdown. Instead, I put on my best smile and ask Lex if he wants to go on the Ferris wheel, just him and me. Nothing better than a slow amusement park ride to distract you from asking yourself ‘what if.’

We pay for the tickets and jump in the next carriage to arrive. It’s a beautiful night with a clear sky. The moon is shining bright, and if you stare long enough, you can catch a glimpse of a shooting star.

There are only a few people riding the wheel, but there’s no one in the carriages immediately surrounding us. We sit there silently staring at the view below us, but his stare remains fixated on me.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.”

“You know, when a woman says she’s fine, she’s usually not fine,” he tells me with a warm smile.

He can’t possibly understand the thoughts in my head, so I do the only thing I can to distract him, I run my hand along his thigh stopping in the middle of his legs.

Pulling me close to him, I devour his scent, allowing it to intoxicate my senses. I place my lips on his, kissing him. He returns the kiss until the Ferris wheel stops because more people are getting on. I want more, something dirtier than just kissing on the Ferris wheel.

As if he can read my mind, his hand grazes my thigh, but instead of lifting my dress he slides his hand behind and under my ass. My body shivers in anticipation—the movement of the carriage, the warm breeze, and the loud noises surrounding us—as he moves slowly until he finds what he’s looking for. I can see the turmoil in his eyes as he slowly slides a finger inside of me, causing me to gasp when he pushes in deeper. Closing my eyes momentarily, I allow my entire body to feel the rush until his lips brush against my ear.

“Another finger?”

My thoughts are incoherent, and only managing to nod, he slides in another finger. I squeeze my legs tight, adding to the intensity. I want to push the boundaries we never could push before.

“Should I be a nice husband and make you come on the Ferris wheel?”

I turn to look at him, my eyes wild, ready to combust on his fingers. I moan, my breaths deepening, desperate to finish after his incessant teasing all day.

The carriage sways as we sit at the top. I can’t even admire the view because it’s all a blur. There’s no one around us. No one who can see us, anyway.

“Answer me,” he demands.

“Yes… please.”

I don’t care that I’m begging, and my panties are soaked. Just a slight push is all I need as he thrusts his third finger in—the power of his touch barreling through every inch of my body. I’m falling into a beautiful abyss. Struggling to control my body, I buckle in his embrace, bowing my head as I’m consumed by the tingling sensation lingering.

My body starts to gain its composure as I slowly open my eyes. The first thing I notice is his arousal standing up like an eyesore—a beautiful eyesore, mind you.

With a roguish smirk smeared across his face, he demands I open my mouth, forcing me to taste my arousal on his fingers. A spark inside me ignites, and despite my earlier release, I’m back to square one again. What’s he doing to me?

I attempt to fix my dress, so it isn’t obvious I got finger-fucked on the Ferris wheel. If anyone can spot that it will be Nikki. It isn’t a surprise when Nikki laughs at me on the way toward the exit, pulling me aside, asking me if I enjoyed my Mark Wahlberg-Reese Witherspoon moment. I swear she has some sex radar, it’s frightening.

Will begins to get whiny, a sign of his exhaustion. I feel the same after last night’s poker game. After Will’s sugar rush wore off, he complains about walking home. Lex offers to piggyback him to the house which he gladly accepts. Will went on and on about the magician and how cool it was when the rabbit disappeared. Lex smiles, nodding along with everything Will says.

“I know what you’re thinking,” I say to Nikki as she watches them.

“Go on then, Charlie. What am I thinking?

“That I should stop. That he’s no good for me.”

“I never said that.”

“But I know that’s what you’re thinking.”

She remains quiet, her usual judgment expression absent. Nikki has an opinion on everything, and from day one, she disliked Lex and everything about us.

“Charlie… he’s not who I thought he was.”

“Oh?” Raising my brows, my head jerks back. “Do you care to elaborate?”

Rocky places his arm around Nikki and whispers something into her ear, interrupting us. She giggles, and I refuse to ask what he said. I swore I heard the word strap-on. Again, I didn’t want to ask.

Adriana and Elijah make a decision to take a walk along the beach while Nikki and Rocky decide to stay in and watch a movie since Will’s gone to bed. Lex asks me if I want to go for a ride on the bike. Of course, I agree. I love to ride, but for once, I’ll be the passenger.

We place our helmets on as he starts up the engine. He’s beaming from the thrill of it all, racing in and out of the streets. I grip him tight but decide it will be fun to tease him.

As he takes on a straight part of the road, I slide my hands down to the top of his jeans. The moment I do, I’m sure it’s no coincidence that I feel the engine roar. Slowly, I slide them into the front of his jeans until his cock is lying firmly in my hands.

I’m obsessed with it.

I want it twenty-four seven—in my mouth, my pussy, my ass, fucking everywhere.

It’s incredibly hard, but his skin’s so smooth at the same time. I tighten my grip, stroking him.

Driving up through a windy road, we end up at the top of the cliffs in a secluded area. Lex parks the bike, so I pull my hand out of his jeans and jump off, undoing my helmet.

The second I’m able to breathe, he crashes his lips onto mine, thrusting his tongue in my mouth. He never stops even to take a breath, sucking on my bottom lip as I struggle to breathe. The sheer force of it all takes the wind from me, leaving my lips swollen.

“You start it, you finish it,” he barks.

He unbuttons his jeans, pushing my head down to his cock. There’s no waiting, no more teasing. I take him all in, sucking greedily while he leans against the bike.

My saliva builds up around his cock, making sounds as he arches his back. I take him as deep as I can while he tugs my hair, watching me. His eyes are on fire, his body tense as he struggles to hold on. This time, I’ll push him over the edge.

Distancing my mouth, I continue to stroke him. “Should I be a nice wife and make you come here on the bike?”

He groans, nodding his head, unable to form any type of coherent answer for me. Seconds later, a warm sweet taste hits the back of my throat. I swallow every drop, licking my lips as I finish him off then licking his cock clean.

“Fuck, Charlotte,” he grunts, still gripping onto my hair.

I button his jeans, but his hand grips around my wrist. My eyes meet his, and in one glance, I know this is far from over. Lex has the stamina of a wild stallion—he can put porn stars to shame.

“I don’t know why you’re buttoning my jeans. Get your pussy on this bike and spread your beautiful legs,” he demands.

Well, it would be incredibly rude not to follow his instructions. When a gorgeous man like Lex tells you he’s going to eat your pussy, you spread your legs faster than the speed of light.

On top of the bike, I sit legs spread, waiting in anticipation. Lex is all about self-gratification, circling his tongue around my clit, taking his fingers and shoving them inside, twisting them, then removing them abruptly to suck on them. Watching him taste me all over his fingers is the icing on the fucking sex cake.

My legs begin to feel like jelly, and I’m barely able to stand. I turn around, so my back is facing him. Leaning my body over the bike, he places his thumb on my asshole rubbing it slightly. With no control, my body begins to cave again. Placing his cock at the entrance, he begins teasing me.

The wait is slowly killing me, and frustrated, I reach around and force him inside me. He grunts as he thrusts, murmuring profanities in my ear. Lex begins to weaken, and my inner self is relishing in this man completely at my mercy.

“Charlotte, I can’t take this anymore. You’re mine, you understand? It’s always been us.”

His words resonate with me. I want to be his, but I need to be the only woman in his life. I need that promise now more than ever.

I scream his name as my legs start to shake, and every part of me is covered in goosebumps.

One more thrust, deeper and deeper he goes until I come undone. He rides the wave out with me, blowing inside until his body stiffens.

Our bodies slow down, and the slower we go, the more I ache. My muscles tighten, I can barely move. He pulls himself out slowly, kissing my back as he does. Buttoning up his jeans, he leans over and fixes my dress.

Looking into his eyes, something passes between us. No one has fucked me like Lex, and no one has ever made me climax so hard, I swear it’s like an out-of-body experience. We are having fun, and I don’t want to ruin it by mixing in this emotional bullshit.

As I steady myself, I take in my surroundings. The view is incredible. The ocean is dark, but the sounds of the waves crashing echo through the night.

“Wow, this is amazing. How did you know about this place?”

Lex grins. “Google Maps.”

“Oh, I thought this was your go-to-make-out-with-girls place,” I tease.

“It is now.”

He pulls me into an embrace, kissing me deeply. Afraid, I pull away, unaware if he notices or not.

Lex grabs my hand, walking me toward the edge where we take a seat, admiring the view of the ocean and the lights in the distance. He sits behind me, pulling me in to keep me warm.

“Remember how I promised you on that prom night years ago how we’d watch the sunrise?”

“Yes,” I murmur, swallowing the pain caught in my throat.

“Let’s do that tonight. Let’s stay here and watch the sun rise.”

“Lex, I…”

I don’t know what to say, not ready for the emotional attachment. He’s pushing me, and I don’t like to be pushed. It frightens me, makes me feel weak, taking me back to that dark place again.

“Charlotte, don’t. Just let us have this moment.”

I sit there quietly, my mind flashing back to the big fight we had the week before prom.

“Prom, now that was a night to remember…” he trails off.

“I remember our big fight before it, too.”

“Charlotte. You know I never slept with Samantha while we were together, right? She told me when she confessed about the baby that I was so wasted that night, she did try, but it was impossible.”

“I know.”

Samantha and I had come to a truce and sort of became friends not that Lex would ever be happy with that. I know she wouldn’t lie about that, but again it boils down to trust. The fact that he stayed married, that he thought he may have slept with her, it was enough to break me, to break us.

“But you still don’t trust me?” he huffs, annoyed.

I stare out into the dark night, willing my feelings to come out.

“Lex, my life fell apart when you left. To hear these rumors that she was pregnant, to find out from Adriana that you had left town, and I couldn’t contact you. I had no closure. I was left picking up the pieces of what I thought was the greatest love of all time. I felt betrayed. I was the laughing stock of the town, and to have to confront my dad… he literally wanted to hunt you down and kill you.” My throat begins to close in, swallowing becoming increasingly hard as my heart rate picks up. “It took me so long to find my grounding, to build my life again, and to be able to trust anyone. It wasn’t just you I lost, there was also Adriana. She was my best friend for as long as I can remember. And Finn? You can hate him as much as you want, but he brought me back to life. He made me function as a human being again. Made me laugh for the first time, granted it was a funny situation, but he has always had my back and I love him like a brother. You may not have seen that side of him, but he always takes care of me. My poor grandmother glued me back together as complete as I could be. She taught me about life and moving on to achieve and have the ability to be able to dream and aspire again. I wouldn’t be sitting here with you if it weren’t for her. As for Julian, for the first time since you left me, he made me realize I could love again.”

“So, you still love him?” he interrupts me. Of course, he would.

“He made me smile again. Made me realize that I couldn’t go on waiting for a clone of you to walk back into my life. I know you hate him, and I know you want me to end all ties, but Lex, you need to give me time to decide this on my own. Do I trust him? Yes, I do because he hasn’t given me any reason not to. But you made me lose all trust in you, in us. You want me, Lex? Then give me time. Don’t push me because you might not like the answer.”

“And how do you think Mr. Trustworthy will handle knowing you have spent your weekend fucking me?”

“My relationship with Julian is just that, between the two of us. Okay, so yeah, it was my fault for this nothing’s off-limits thing, but well…” I search for a reason to justify my impulsive behavior. There’s no reason other than the fact that I am a horny little bitch who needs my fix.

“Yeah, I get it. The rabbit broke and you needed cock,” he answers, hurt.

“No, Lex, it’s not like that. Please don’t get me wrong. Oh shit! Let me pull my feet out of my mouth.” This is going downhill very fast. “I just need you physically.”

“Like I said.” He stands, wiping his hands on his jeans.

“Lex, you know it’s not like that—”

He cuts me off, handing me the helmet. “Let’s head back before sunrise.”

“But I thought you wanted to watch it?”

Lex turns to face me, his face void of any loving warmth. His eyes are narrowed, rigid, cold, and hard. In that moment, I know I have hurt him, although it wasn’t my intention. I’ve become the enemy, the woman shredding his heart to pieces.

I have won the game I set out to play.

But revenge isn’t gratifying, at all.

Not when I’m about to lose the man I love.


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