For the first time since I’ve known Adrian, I get on my knees.
Not so he can punish or fuck me from behind, but for him.
Because I want to give him something.
Usually, he’s the one who initiates sexual activities and I’m there for the ride. I love his rough handling and unapologetic sexual drive. I love that he never seems to get enough of me.
And now, I want to use that so he doesn’t retreat back to his highly built walls.
Due to his indifference, I went crazy the first time. I went so crazy that I thought it was a good idea to send a strange lookalike to him, and then I jumped off a cliff.
I don’t think I can do that anymore. I can’t handle that side of him.
So I choose to do something I never have.
Adrian stares down at me with drawn brows and eyes so gray, they blacken in the darkness. I don’t even care that we’re in a semi-public place and that anyone can walk by and see me on my knees in front of him. I feel that if I don’t do this now, I’ll lose him. Maybe not right away, but it’ll happen in the long run like before.
I reach for his belt and unbuckle it, my thighs clenching at the reminder of the amount of both pleasure and pain this belt has brought me over the years.
He lets me free his cock, and I have to use both hands to clutch him. They tremble slightly around his length as it hardens in an instant at my touch.
“What are you doing, Lia?”
Staring up at him, I offer him what we both want. “Fuck my mouth, Adrian.”
“You actually think I want to after what I just witnessed?”
I glide my hand from the root up and then down, adding pressure until I’m jacking him off, mimicking the same level of violence that he usually uses on himself before he comes all over my breasts, ass, or pussy. “You do. You love punishing me.”
My pace picks up, relying on pure instinct as I lean over and lick the precum from the tip and suck him into my mouth.
A deep groan spills from his lips and I use it as an incentive to quicken what I’m doing. A weird sense of empowerment mixed with arousal hits me. My thighs clench and my heart thunders so loud, it nearly bursts my chest open.
I’m the one who’s giving him pleasure now, the reason he’s releasing the appreciative noises and thickening in my mouth. Right in this moment, I’m the only one who can grant him release.
Adrian sinks his strong, lean fingers into my hair, then tugs me back by it. I don’t release the tip of his cock or loosen my hands as I stare up at him.
His height is blocking the dim light coming through the entrance of the alleyway and he looks like a general, a warrior.
Or maybe he’s just still the devil.
Because despite the lust shining in his ash eyes, his features are as hard as granite, glinting with the promise of pain.
“Remove your hands, Lia.”
I drop them to my lap, eager to let him take control. I might love having these reactions from him, but I think my real pleasure has always been when Adrian owns me wholly.
Body.
Heart.
And soul.
“I know you’ve been texting him,” he says with a feigned calm that chills me to the bones. “Did you think I wouldn’t know just because you deleted the texts?”
I shake my head and start to inch away so I can speak, so I can explain, but Adrian thrusts his cock to the back of my throat. My gag reflex kicks in and I slap both palms on his thighs.
My nails dig into his pants, but that doesn’t deter him as he pulls back the slightest bit before slamming back inside and holding it there. He chokes me, confiscating my air and leaving me hanging by a thread.
“I only let it slide to see how far you’d go, Lia. How fucking much you’d betray me.”
I want to deny it, to tell him that I thought I was an imposter, that I was jealous of my own self because I didn’t have him. Because I believed he loved another woman and not me.
However, Adrian doesn’t allow me any room to breathe, let alone talk.
My lungs burn from the lack of oxygen and tears cling to my lids at the way he keeps holding his dick at the back of my throat.
“Did you let him fuck your mouth, too? My mouth?”
I attempt to shake my head, but I’m too dizzy and without air.
I think I’ll faint.
That I will blackout from being choked by his cock.
However, he finally pulls his length out, and I sputter for air, coughing, my lungs aching from exertion.
“A-Adrian, I—” Before I can take a full gulp of air, he’s pounding in again with a merciless rotation of his hips, pushing all the way in.
Even with him fucking my throat, he’s still not completely inside my mouth. He’s too big for that and his cock is too thick.
His other hand grips my jaw with two fingers and tilts my chin up. “Did you look up at him with these fucking tears in your eyes?”
I shake my head, but the gesture is barely-there as Adrian powers in and out of my mouth with a mad rhythm that’s out of control. I’m lightheaded, unable to breathe, and my hold on his thigh is more for balance than anything else now. I feel like if I let him go, I’ll fall.
Or maybe worse.
My husband uses my mouth like it’s his own vessel of punishment. He drives in, keeping his cock at the base of my throat, then pulls out, allowing me a sliver of air before he rams back inside.
I don’t attempt to stop him as he uses me, punishes me, and takes out his anger on me.
If anything, my thighs tighten every time he confiscates my air. Every time he thrusts in with unapologetic force, manhandling me, taking what he wants from me.
Drool drips down my chin and tears streak my cheeks, but I still keep my mouth open whenever he pulls out. I still want him inside, even if my jaw aches.
However, punishing me doesn’t seem to take the edge away from his savage features. Instead, it seems to deepen, heighten, sharpen them.
“I spend two months, two fucking months, entertaining your belief that you’re Winter, and just when I think I have you back, just when I start to believe you’ll be different, you fuck up everything.”
A sob tears from my throat, but it’s lost in the sound of him fucking my mouth—or more accurately, my throat.
“This mouth is mine, Lia. Only mine.”
I nod frantically, even though he didn’t ask a question.
Adrian’s grip tightens on my hair and his body goes rigid. I think he’ll come, but that doesn’t seem to be the case.
He keeps going on and on, his hips thrusting with a ruthlessness that steals my thoughts and my breath.
“Open your mouth wide,” he finally grunts.
I do, sticking my tongue out the slightest bit.
Adrian releases my jaw and tugs my head back using my hair. “Fucking mine.”
And with that, he comes all over my lips, tongue, and throat. I swallow as much as possible, but some of his cum rolls down my chin, mixing with the saliva and tears.
I’m panting and aching between my legs, but I ignore all that and focus on Adrian.
He’s still gripping me by the hair, and even though he just came, his cock is already semi-hard as if ready for more.
I don’t stop staring at him. In part because of how utterly beautiful he is, but also because I’ve always loved witnessing the moment of ecstasy on his face right after an orgasm.
But the most important part is because I need to know he still wants me. That what happened just now wasn’t only him punishing me or the mere fusing of our bodies, but something more.
Adrian tucks himself in with one hand and does his zipper, not bothering with the belt. His hold is still harsh and unforgiving on my hair as he pulls me up by it.
I stumble to my feet, gripping his bicep for balance. We’re standing toe-to-toe, one ragged pulse against the other, and my heart flips in my chest at being this close to him.
It’s never felt ordinary over the years. Adrian will always have a part of me in the palm of his hand.
He’ll always make me stop and stare.
He grips my chin again. This time, his fingers trace over my lips that are still coated with his cum. “Whose mouth is this?”
I don’t even think as I whisper, “Yours.”
“Whose tears are these?”
“Yours…” He leans over and licks them off my cheek, then bites down slightly.
I shudder, my whole body drowning in a shockwave of emotions as he nibbles his way to my ear and murmurs in hot, dark words, “You’d best remember that, Lenochka.”
