When Kirill said Aleksander would keep an eye on me, I didn’t think it would be close.
As in, across from the firm close. As in, he’s in his car, watching me like a hawk while I walk through the front entrance with coffee.
Usually, Gwen gets the coffee, or Chris. Anyone but me basically, since I try to keep human contact as minimum as possible.
But today, both of them were busy and I had to go. I had to cross the distance to the coffee shop and pretend that I wasn’t being shadowed by a scary man in a black suit.
It’s been like this for a week. Ever since I was ambushed in my apartment by Kirill and Adrian and told that I had a role to play.
That no matter what I do, I’ll never stop being the Bratva’s princess.
As promised, Adrian must’ve not told my father, or he would’ve sent his guards to fetch me.
Kirill kept his word about not leaving me unsupervised, which is why his right-hand man, Aleksander, has been following me around discretely. To people on the outside, it wouldn’t be noticeable since he changes car models, plates, and even the color of his clothes.
He’s a professional, after all.
Though this is a rare occasion where he’s not acting like Kirill’s shadow.
And because I’m attuned to him and to the danger he represents, I spotted him the first time Knox and I left his penthouse together.
I had to distract him from looking at the rearview mirror so he wouldn’t realize we were being followed. The last thing I want is for him to clash with the other men from my life.
Especially after I met his family, a welcoming one with their distinctive sense of humor and mannerisms.
That night, they stayed over. We had dinner together and played board games. Ethan and Elsa told me all sorts of stories about Knox’s teenage years and how competitive he was—still is. I listened with keen interest to every detail, every piece of information about a version of Knox I’ve never met.
No clue why I held on to every word, but it felt vital in a way. Like a memento I needed to keep close.
Or maybe I just care about Knox more than I want to admit.
Teal wasn’t much of a willing participant in telling stories, but I loved the seamless relationship she has with her brother.
The way they understand each other without having to say a word.
Before they left the following morning, she stood there with her hands crossed over her chest and told me point-blank, “You better not hurt my brother.”
That sentence stayed with me the most after their visit.
It’s as if she knew that’s exactly what would happen.
I don’t blame her for disliking me. I actually respect her for looking out for her brother. That’s what family does.
Unlike mine.
My gaze flits to Aleksander’s car. Even though it has tinted windows, I can almost picture him staring back with that cold gaze of his that only ever softens around Kirill.
He must’ve figured out my relationship with Knox, and if Adrian’s threat is any indication, they wouldn’t hesitate to use him against me.
To hurt him because of me.
Because that’s what they do in the brotherhood. They use people, break hearts, and crunch bones.
And I’m no exception.
If anything, I’m placed on a high pedestal for being the Pakhan’s daughter. It’s a cruel twist of fate that my mom got pregnant after a short fling with my father—the number one man in the Bratva.
She married my stepfather afterward and I should’ve been a normal citizen. But that jerk was abusing her, both physically and emotionally, and although she tried to protect me, she knew she couldn’t.
That’s why she took me to the park that day. I won’t forget it, ever. Not only because Mom was shaking, but also because she seemed relieved when a tall man with harsh features came.
And I remember how his shadow blocked the sun as he stood there, watching us. Or more like, watching me.
She told me he was my father and I grabbed onto her, thinking she’d leave me with him, but she didn’t.
They just talked while I played hide-and-seek with one of the other tall men who came with him.
Before Mom and I left, Papa patted my hair. I remember having eyes so big, they nearly reached my hairline. My stepfather never did that, never treated me like more than a pest in his path.
One he kicked around whenever he saw fit.
Papa also gave me a piece of paper with his number on it and told me to call him if I needed anything.
In hindsight, I should never have done that.
It’s why I got trapped in his world in the first place.
But it’s not like I had any other option that night.
Now that I think about it, the moment I called him, crying on the phone, was when I sealed my fate.
That was when I became part of the Bratva.
My phone vibrates in my pocket, bringing me out of my reverie.
It’s a text from an unknown number.
I don’t see the lawyer losing any cases. On the contrary, he’s coming on even stronger. Here’s a little incentive for you.
My thumb shakes as I click on the attached video. It’s taken from a parking garage’s surveillance camera. The building in which Knox’s apartment is. I recognize it from the yellow lines on the ground and the strong light.
It’s dimmer in the video, though, as if someone cut off the power on purpose.
My heart hammers in my throat when Knox steps out of his car, carrying his briefcase and talking on the phone. He’s wearing the black suit that I helped him put on yesterday. I clearly remember it because he decided to fuck me at the last second before we went to work and ordered me not to mess up our clothes.
This footage was taken when he got home last night, later than usual, since he had a long meeting with Lauren about Sandra’s case.
At exactly that moment when he was getting home, I was trying to fix something for dinner. Elsa called me and I burned the pasta anyway, so I kept talking to her and ordered something.
It all seems normal until the angle shifts to following Knox from behind as he walks to the elevator.
I gasp, nearly spilling the coffee when I make out what’s at the back of his head.
A red dot.
A sniper rifle’s red dot.
And it’s following him all the way to the elevator until the video ends.
I’m about to have an epic meltdown when another text comes through.
If you don’t do as you’re told, the next footage will show a bullet in his head.
My legs tremble, refusing to hold me upright, and it takes everything in me not to collapse in the middle of the street.
It’s Adrian.
I knew his threats wouldn’t be empty ones and I just got firsthand proof that he already has someone following Knox, and not just anyone. A sniper.
Moisture stings my eyes at the thought that he could’ve died in that instant while I was completely clueless.
It doesn’t matter who I am or who my father is. When push comes to shove, I’m unable to do anything except for playing by the rules.
My focus falls on Aleksander’s car across the street and I hide my phone, then quicken my pace to inside the building, my mind nearly exploding with a thousand thoughts.
If I suspected it before, then I’m sure about it now.
I’m a danger to Knox.
If I don’t stay away from him, he’ll sure as hell get killed.
My heart squeezes, then thumps loudly in a sporadic rhythm. The possibility of something happening to him churns the contents of my stomach until I feel like I’m going to throw up on the sidewalk.
I place a hand on my chest, trying to quench the nausea rising to my throat.
But it only gets worse.
I shouldn’t have slept with him that day.
I shouldn’t have been selfish and wished for something I’m not allowed to have.
What’s more, I should’ve run as fast as I could the day I met him again. Just why the hell did I let it go so far?
Why did I allow him to become such a vital part of my life that I feel physically sick at the thought of parting from him?
“What is it?”
I jolt near the reception area and nearly spill the coffee. I realize I’m grasping the holder in a death-grip and my whole body is tight as I look over my shoulder.
To where I left Aleksander across the street.
I didn’t even notice Knox approaching me. He’s standing in front of me now, wearing a sharp gray suit and holding his leather briefcase.
Lauren and Chris are a few steps behind him. They’re going to a hearing, I recall. Sandra’s. I said I wouldn’t be able to attend today, because I’m sure Adrian or Kirill will be there. Or worse, someone else.
And if I were to see any of them, I’d have a meltdown of epic proportions.
“Jane.” There’s a warning in his tone, a demand for me to answer his question.
On one hand, I’m thankful he respects my choice about my public persona and didn’t call me Anastasia. But on the other hand, I’m starting to hate this name.
The fake one.
The wrong one.
“It’s…nothing.”
He grabs me by the elbow and pushes me to the hall, away from eavesdroppers.
Then he’s towering over me, his height and presence blocking any outside interference and causing my stomach to tighten. I’ve always loved having him so close that I can’t see anyone past him.
When did this position become my favorite?
He observes me for a second, his lethal eyes narrowing for a beat. “Are you going to tell me what’s wrong?”
“There’s really n—”
“Don’t finish that lie.” His features harden and a muscle works in his jaw. That’s when I know that I won’t like what he’ll say next. “You think I haven’t noticed your jumpy, shifty attitude since I caught you packing and ready to run? I’ve given you enough time to mull it over and I need an answer now.”
My focus shifts sideways when someone passes us by. “This isn’t the time or place. Don’t you have a hearing?”
“I’m not moving from here until you give me something. Is it about the car that’s been following you for the past week?”
I flinch, my back hitting the wall behind me. “W-what?”
“No amount of distraction on your part will scatter my focus from my surroundings, Anastasia. So tell me, is it about that? Are they people from your past?”
“Why are you so sure they were following me? Maybe they were following you.”
“They didn’t when I left the firm, but they just did when you went out to get coffee.”
Shit.
It was wishful thinking to believe he wouldn’t notice.
This is Knox, after all. He’s so attuned to details, it’s disturbing sometimes. But even he didn’t notice Adrian’s sniper. Instead of being in-your-face like Aleksander, Adrian and Kirill more discreet yet highly efficient.
If Adrian chooses to, he can kill him in a heartbeat.
My lips tremble at that and I force them shut because Knox is still looking at me, waiting for an answer.
I swallow, resisting the urge to put a hand on my chest, since he knows it’s a nervous habit. “It’s really nothing. I swear.”
He jams his fist at the wall beside my head and I startle, even though the move isn’t strong or surprising. I think it’s the expression on his face that shoots tendrils of fear to the bottom of my stomach.
Knox isn’t the type to get angry often or without a reason, but his jaw is clenching now and a muscle jumps in the veins of his neck.
His anger is raw, furious yet still calm. And I’m in the middle of it now. Worse, I think I’ll be swept away by it.
“If you repeat the word “nothing” one more time, I swear to fuck…” he trails off, his nostrils flaring.
“Can’t you just leave it alone?”
“No.”
“Knox…”
“Why are you building a wall between us, Anastasia? Hmm?”
“I am?”
“I feel it, and it keeps getting taller with every passing second.”
“Maybe that wall was supposed to be there from the beginning. It’s safer. For both of us.”
“You mean, for you.”
All the anxiety and fear of the unknown rush to the surface, exploding in a myriad of red-hot temper. “Yes, for me! You have no idea who I am or what you’ve gotten yourself into. The day you do, you’ll curse the moment you met me. I’m defective, okay? Do you know what I do to people? I destroy them.”
“You can’t destroy me, beautiful. That was done way before you came along, so how about you tell me what’s haunting you?”
“How do you know something’s haunting me?”
“I saw it that night. In your ocean blue eyes. They were a little bit haunted, a little bit broken. Just like me. Usually, I don’t get close to people who give off vibes that resemble mine, but you were the exception, my little liar. You still are.”
“You shouldn’t have made me an exception.” I sniffle. “I’m bad for you.”
“And I’m bad for you, too. You don’t see me asking you to leave because of that. In fact, I never will since I happen to be fucking selfish. When I covet something, I keep it. I don’t throw it away and I certainly don’t let it slip from my hands. So you’re fucking stuck with me, Anastasia.”
“What if I want to leave?”
“No, you don’t. You’re just running away because that’s what you’re good at, but you’ll quit that fucking habit with me. Do you know why?”
“Why?”
“Because I’m keeping you. Whether you like it or not.”
I see it then. The determination.
The stubborn determination and the raw possessiveness.
And something tells me it’ll just get worse from here on. That he’ll not only demand to know more, but he’ll also keep me. Whether I like it or not, as he said.
If anything, the more I fight, the harder he’ll chain me to him.
Because he’s decided that he covets me. Wants me.
He won’t allow me to run or escape or search for an alternative solution.
And I can’t stay. Not if I want to keep Adrian and Kirill away from him.
The painful decision thuds against my ribcage with crushing reality, leaving me hollow.
My words are barely audible when I whisper, “I want to break up.”
A muscle works in his jaw and his fist flexes on the wall. I think he’ll move his hand, whether to choke or grab me, I don’t know, but he doesn’t. Instead, it remains there, as stonelike as his presence, as if he’s pining for patience. “What the fuck did you just say?”
“I…want to end this. Whatever this is.”
There’s a manic light in his eyes that I’ve never seen before. “Hmm. I don’t think you were listening, Anastasia, because I just told you that won’t be happening.”
“You can’t tell me what to do. I’m breaking up with you.” My heart bleeds with every word out of my mouth, but I’m so thankful for my calm tone and the false composure in it.
My brain realizes this is the only way to protect him. The only way I’ll keep him out of the sniper’s range.
If he’s out of the picture, Adrian won’t have anything to threaten me with.
This time, Knox’s hand finds my throat, the hold is tight and unyielding, as if he’s driving his words home. “You can break up with me all you want, but you’re still fucking mine.”
