Being onstage for the ball scene was like being in an enchanted world. Tiny fairy lights twinkled all around, and couples in fifties finery and delicate masks bowed to each other and began gliding around the stage.
Hayden’s eyes never left mine as we danced. I vowed that in the next scene change I’d speak to him.
No, I wouldn’t.
Yes, I would.
No, I couldn’t.
As I watched the glowing fairy lights dancing their own waltz in Hayden’s eyes, a question jumped into my brain. I didn’t subconsciously want this kiss to take place, did I? I didn’t actually want to experience a kiss from Hayden Paris’s lips, which had told me that I looked exquisite and seemed so soft and …
Oh my god! I tore my eyes away from Hayden’s mouth.
The fairy lights and the waltzing were getting to me. That explained why I felt so giddy, and why I was feeling this weird affection towards Hayden. That and the fact that he’d saved my life. It would be totally abnormal not to feel a fondness for your rescuer.
Oh my god! That was why I was experiencing such lack of resolve when it came to the Stop Kiss conversation. I didn’t want to hurt Hayden’s feelings!
I looked into his eyes and guilt hit me like a sledgehammer. It would be impossible for him not to take it personally. He’d wonder if he was unattractive, or had bad breath, or worse, that word had got around that he was a terrible kisser.
As the scene ended, I exited the stage feeling like the worst person in the world.
Sara grabbed me by the shoulder. ‘So … exquisite, hey?’
I gave her a look.
‘It’s going to happen,’ she said, ‘you and Hayden locking lips. I say after all that’s gone on this evening, it’s a certainty.’
‘It’s not going to happen!’ I hissed, even though my guilt over Hayden’s upcoming emotional breakdown was hitting me hard.
‘It is,’ Sara said in a singsong voice.
‘It isn’t!’
‘It is!’
‘You won’t believe what just happened!’ Cassie flew over to us, her cheeks scarlet.
‘Hayden’s come up with more compliments for Aurora?’ Sara asked.
‘What?’ Cassie looked confused.
‘I’ll fill you in later,’ Sara said. ‘It’s juicy news.’
‘Sara, he was just being nice —’
‘He was just being “Oh my god, I’m in love with Aurora!”’
I reeled around to face her. ‘Sara, stage nerves have turned you loony. It was a compliment, not a declaration.’
‘Scott tried to kiss me!’ Cassie cried, then clapped her hand over her mouth as the actors onstage went quiet.
Sara’s eyes goggled and I knew my jaw was virtually touching my chest. We must have looked pretty comical.
The lights onstage dimmed as Hero and Claudio’s betrothal scene ended.
‘Finally!’ I threw my arms around Cassie. ‘Wait a minute. Did you say “tried”? As in, it didn’t happen?’
‘Next scene!’ Jelena appeared behind us in stage-manager mode. ‘Sara, you’re up.’
Sara looked pleadingly at Jelena. ‘But Cassie’s kiss … I have to hear the details.’
‘Get on that stage, Sara.’ Jelena’s voice was no-nonsense. ‘I’m not going to tell you again.’ She gave Sara a push and she disappeared. Jelena turned to us. ‘So what’s going on? Are we talking Scott and Cassie?’
‘Shh!’ Cassie pulled us to a quieter spot in the wings. ‘Okay, we were shifting one of the cumquat trees offstage. I’d just put it down when I realised that my necklace had caught on one of the branches.’ Cassie fingered her gold locket. ‘Before I could say anything, Scott was on his knees next to me, trying to free it. He was this close.’ Cassie put her hand twenty centimetres from her face. ‘His hands were touching my neck, and he glanced up at me and his face went all serious — and he went to kiss me! I thought I was going to pass out with anticipation!’
‘Good!’ I cried. ‘I mean, not the passing out bit but the kissing bit.’
Cassie’s expression changed to bewilderment. ‘And then he stopped! Five centimetres away from my lips! He whispered, “I can’t do this!” and rushed off!’
‘“I can’t do this”?’ Jelena repeated. ‘Why couldn’t he do it?’
‘Maybe he had performance anxiety?’ I suggested. ‘Knowing that he was about to kiss the girl of his dreams.’
‘What a wimp!’ Jelena scoffed.
‘Jelena!’ I cried. ‘It’s touching that he’s nervous!’
‘He didn’t look nervous,’ Cassie said. ‘Well, not until the whole I-can’t-do-this comment. There’s some other reason — I don’t have bad breath, do I?’ She looked horrified.
‘Never, in ten years of knowing you, Cass, have you ever had bad breath,’ Jelena reassured her. ‘He’s just a wimp!’
‘Maybe he was worried about his breath?’ I said, knowing how lame it sounded. ‘Or maybe he thought that the moment wasn’t quite right?’
‘If the moment wasn’t right, then why did he start moving towards her in the first place?’ Jelena asked, lowering her voice.
‘Cass, there’s some perfectly good reason why he pulled away,’ I said. ‘Maybe he remembered something he had to do for the next scene —’
‘Oh god!’ Cassie looked at the actors in the wings. ‘I’ve got to change the backdrop with him.’
‘Oops! I’m needed in props!’ Jelena said, and dashed off.
‘How am I going to face him?’ Cassie asked me. Her face was creased with tension.
‘He’s the one that backed out of the kiss,’ I said. ‘Right now he’s going to feel seriously emasculated. So if you play it cool —’
‘I can’t.’
‘You can. Because once we discover the reason for this odd behaviour, you’ll be so happy that you didn’t get worked up about it.’ I crossed my fingers behind my back, hoping my words would prove true.
Cassie gave me a resigned wave, looking as though she was heading to the gallows instead of just backstage. Poor Cass. Why on earth had Scott hightailed it? Anyone could see that Cassie was not only beautiful but also angelic. What guy wouldn’t want to kiss her? If only I could read Scott’s mind. Maybe I could try asking Hayden again …
Hayden! The whole Cassie–Scott debacle had totally distracted me from the fact that I had to talk to Hayden soon. Like within thirty minutes.
Okay, it was time to brainstorm. Ways to tell Hayden to keep his mouth to himself without hurting his feelings.
Wait a minute. There was a less scarring option. What if I made it about ME, not him?
Hayden’s soliloquy drifted into my thoughts: They say too that she will rather die than give any sign of affection …
My mouth dropped open. Here was the reason: I had issues about PDAs. This kiss was a VERY public display of affection (hello, three hundred people in the audience) and I was uneasy with it. In fact, it was against my new-found religion. Hayden would hardly want to make me go against my principles, being a stay-true-to-your-beliefs individual himself. Okay, I had a plan.
I would tell him during the scene just before Hero and Claudio’s wedding, which was very short. That way I could say it firmly but quickly and Hayden wouldn’t have time to try to reason with me before we got pushed onstage.
As everyone in the wedding party assembled by the front entrance of the auditorium (Mr Peterman wanted us to use the auditorium aisle as the church aisle), I frantically looked for Hayden. He hadn’t turned up yet. Jelena began arranging the bridal party in order of appearance.
‘Aurora, is something up?’ she asked. ‘You seem very on edge.’
‘On edge, me?’ My voice was unsteady.
Recognition dawned on her face. ‘The big moment’s coming up soon, isn’t it? Have you made up your mind what you’re going to do?’
‘I … I’ve just got to talk to — Hayden!’
Hayden raced up to me. ‘Sorry!’ His breath came in short gasps. ‘My shirt for the wedding was missing — Lindsay had to tear the costume department apart. We finally found it underneath Jeffrey’s saddle. Can I talk to you, Aurora? Privately?’
It was like he’d read my mind. ‘Let’s go.’
‘Where are you going?’ Jelena cried. ‘You’re on in eight minutes!’
I took off before she could say anything more. Eight minutes should be long enough for a hurried ‘I have a problem with PDAs’ speech, shouldn’t it? I dashed round the corner and pulled Hayden into the privacy of the archway that led to the school garden. We were both breathing heavily — him, presumably, from the mad dash to find his shirt, and me out of panic that I might not have time to talk to him.
‘Hayden, I —’
‘Aurora, I have something really important to say to you.’ Hayden looked at me intently.
‘Aurora!’
Someone laid a hand on my shoulder. I whirled around to see Benjamin standing behind me. I felt his eyes taking in my yellow bridesmaid’s dress.
‘You were great in that last scene,’ he said. ‘I wished I’d been dancing with you myself.’ He smirked at Hayden. ‘I don’t suppose you could give us a few moments? I have some suggestions for some of Aurora’s scenes.’
Hayden shook his head. ‘Benjamin, I have a suggestion for you —’
‘Benjamin,’ I said, stepping between the two guys, ‘now’s not really a good time for tips.’ I flashed him a smile. ‘Hayden and I are trying to discuss something important.’
‘Ménage à trois in the garden, hmm?’ Jeffrey’s voice came from behind us.
‘There’s nothing going on!’ I cried.
Who knew what rumours this whole thing could start? I looked at my watch again. Three minutes to go.
Hayden, as if reading my mind, grabbed my hand and we were running away from Benjamin and Jeffrey before they could react. Hayden pulled me behind the auditorium’s side wall.
‘Hayden, I —’
Hayden stopped me. ‘Aurora, I have to tell you something before this next scene.’
Based on his urgent tone, it had to be about the kiss. Maybe he had issues with PDA too.
‘I have to tell you something too.’
‘I’ve been meaning to tell you for a while now,’ he went on.
‘You have?’ I couldn’t believe this was turning out to be so easy. ‘So have I!’
‘But I was afraid you would react unfavourably.’
‘So was I!’
‘But now that things have changed between us and we’re friends —’
‘I’m so glad we’re friends,’ I cut in. Having this conversation with an enemy would have been impossible.
Hayden’s face melted into a smile and he squeezed my hand, which he still held. His chest rose as he took a deep breath. ‘I want to tell you that I —’
‘What are you two doing?’
Hayden leapt about a foot and I let out a startled gasp. Jelena stood in front of us, her whole face a scowl.
‘The cast is lined up and the audience is sitting in there waiting!’
She yanked both of us round the corner before we could say a word. Any chance of me talking to Hayden had just been destroyed.
‘Hayden, you’re at the front with the other best man and the groom,’ Jelena ordered.
Hayden paused. ‘But —’
Jelena ignored him. ‘Aurora, you’re next to the bride.’ She pushed me towards Claire, who stood shimmering in her wedding gown and veil.
Jelena turned to Benjamin, Alex and Hayden, who was still looking at me urgently. ‘Boys, you’re up,’ she said. ‘Scene start!’ And she threw open the auditorium door.
I walked slowly up the aisle in front of Claire, smiling serenely at all the wedding guests/audience members, but secretly panicking. Hayden and I might have agreed on the PDA thing, but we had no plan in place for what would happen at the moment of the kiss. Would we just skip over it, or look at each other lovingly, or … I had to talk to him. If we made a mess of the scene, Mr Peterman would commit himself to a mental institution.
As we assembled at the altar, girls on the left, boys on the right, I tried to get Hayden’s attention by waggling my eyebrows.
‘You come hither, my lord, to marry this lady?’ the friar said.
I gave Hayden a subtle wave, then glanced nervously into the audience to see where Mr Peterman was sitting. Hopefully he hadn’t noticed my attempts at non-theatre-related communication.
‘No,’ Benjamin said strongly, stepping away from Hero.
The wedding party stared at him in surprise.
‘Psst!’ I hissed.
Hayden’s head finally turned my way.
‘I have to talk to you,’ I mouthed.
‘What?’ Hayden mouthed back, looking shocked. He took a step towards me.
‘Wait!’ I mouthed.
If he waited till everyone reacted in shock to Claudio’s foul accusation of Hero, then his movement closer to me wouldn’t be as obvious.
Claudio glowered at Leonato and his daughter. ‘Would you not swear, all you that see her, that she were a maid, by these exterior shows? But she is none: she knows the heat of a luxurious bed; her blush is guiltiness, not modesty.’
Claire wavered in an almost faint and half the wedding party rushed forward.
Hayden edged over to my side. ‘Thank god. I really have to tell you something.’
‘Don’t worry. I know it’s about the PDA,’ I murmured, doing my best to look concerned about Hero.
‘PDA?’
‘Yes. What are we going to do about it?’
‘Do?’ Hayden’s eyes registered complete confusion. ‘What on earth does a public display of affection have to do with what we were talking about?’
‘What?’ It wasn’t about the kiss? What on earth was so important then?
Just then I saw an outraged Mr Peterman staring at Hayden and me. Uh-oh.
‘Never mind,’ I said.
‘But, Aurora, you have to know that I —’
‘Mr Peterman is watching us!’
Hayden glanced at the director, whose eyes were bulging at our audacity for talking during a pivotal moment in the play. Hayden quickly moved back to Don Pedro’s side before Mr Peterman could have a megaphone moment.
What on earth was I going to do? For once, my mind wasn’t working fast enough. I spoke my lines and tried my hardest to look convincing, but time sped by and my idea slate was still sickeningly blank.
Before I knew it, Hayden and I were alone in the candlelight once more.
‘Lady Beatrice, have you wept all this while?’
Oh god, I felt like weeping. Why hadn’t I discussed this whole thing with Hayden earlier? I should have been straight up from the beginning, instead of assuming that my Stop Kiss stunts would work.
I could ad-lib. Say something like, ‘Stop, my love, I have the flu — a terrible malady — do not commit your sweet lips to mine.’
No way was the audience going to buy my version of Shakespeare. It had to be more subtle. Maybe if Hayden registered how unwilling I was, he’d pick up my subliminal ‘no kiss’ messages.
As I looked up at him to communicate unwillingness, the fire in his eyes reduced my thoughts to ashes.
I registered myself reciting my lines, but all I knew was Hayden. His dark hair and the way the locks in front swept over to the left, like a wave falling above his eyes … eyes that were alight and holding a thousand secret messages. As my eyes traced his straight nose and cheekbones, I felt I’d never really seen him before.
Hayden gazed into my eyes, just as we’d planned. Here was my last chance to pull away.
‘I love you with so much of my heart that none is left to protest,’ I whispered.
Hayden put his hand on my waist and I knew I wasn’t going anywhere. I wanted to be close to him, closer than anything, in his arms. I wanted to give in to this fainting, falling feeling that had possessed me. This was it.
Hayden’s eyes searched mine for several centuries. My heart drummed.
He slowly lifted my right hand and drew it to his lips, and placed the softest, most tender kiss upon it.
