The NAD beamed at me. ‘You were wonderful!’
I smiled and used all my willpower to focus on the scene around me. I wasn’t going to think about what had happened onstage.
‘All you girls were amazing!’ Cassie’s mother, Celeste, raved. ‘Cassie, your backdrops were so beautiful!’ She gave Cassie a resounding kiss on the forehead.
Cassie and I stood with her mother, father and brother, along with the NAD and Ms DeForest, in a swelling crowd of similarly enthusiastic parents.
‘My daughter, the next Meryl Streep,’ the NAD said and smiled.
‘Dad, that’s a bit of an exaggeration.’
I’d hardly been in the moment during that final scene. Instead, I’d been worrying about a kiss that hadn’t happened.
‘Well, you even made your old dad think you were Beatrice,’ the NAD gushed.
‘The chemistry between you and Hayden was wonderful,’ Mrs Shields said.
‘Yes, the boy next door,’ the NAD said. ‘Much as I hate to say it, that chemistry was already —’
An excited-looking Sara and Jelena raced up. ‘Sorry, Mr Skye, but we have to drag Aurora away for a moment,’ Jelena said. She gave my dad a smooth smile. ‘Important production information.’
‘I’m sure you can discuss it here,’ I said. I knew what she really wanted to talk about.
‘Impossible,’ she said.
I gave a sigh. It was either go with Jelena and Sara and discuss the non-kiss, or stay and listen to the NAD discuss Hayden’s and my supposed relationship. I followed Jelena, Cass coming too. I’d rather talk reality than fiction.
We were barely ten rows away before the onslaught started. I dropped into a seat, unable to cope standing up.
‘So what happened with the kiss?’ Sara sat down next to me and gripped my arm like the machine that doctors use to measure blood pressure. ‘It obviously didn’t happen, so —’
‘How do you know it didn’t happen?’
The moment the scene had finished I’d steered well clear of my friends, curious cast mates and Mr Peterman. I hadn’t wanted to discuss anything.
‘I was watching. Everyone in the cast and crew was,’ Sara said matter-of-factly.
‘Travis Ela even pulled out a video camera to film the big moment, which I smartly confiscated,’ Jelena said, propping her legs up on the empty seat next to her.
‘The big moment that was incredibly disappointing,’ Sara added.
Cassie shook her head. ‘No way was it disappointing. It was the sweetest moment in the whole play.’
‘I’m assuming that your take-off-before-a-major-sceneand-cause-Jelena-a-nervous-breakdown moment was when you and Hayden planned the whole kiss thing?’ Jelena pressed. She took a jumbo bag of jellybeans out of her purse and opened them without taking her penetrating gaze off me. ‘So what story did you spin him?’
‘I didn’t spin anything,’ I said, breaking her gaze.
‘But how did Hayden know not to kiss you then?’ Cassie asked.
‘He didn’t know. He just didn’t kiss me.’ I shrugged in what I hoped was a nonchalant way and took a red jellybean from the packet.
The three of them stared at me. Jelena was so surprised she dropped the jellybean packet.
‘I can’t believe it!’ She squatted in the aisle, trying to round up jellybeans. ‘That’s two guys who’ve backed out of kisses tonight. Is there something in the air?’
‘That is so weird.’ Sara shook her head as she scooped handfuls of jellybeans from under the seats.
‘Look, I don’t get the big deal,’ I said impatiently. ‘I got my wish — the kiss didn’t happen. So let’s drop it, okay?’
I got up from my seat and stalked back to the NAD and Cassie’s family.
‘Sweetie,’ Mrs Shields asked Cassie, who was right at my heels, ‘who’s that nice-looking boy who keeps looking over here? Do you know him?’
We all turned to see who she was talking about. Scott gave an embarrassed smile.
‘Oh, that’s Scott,’ Cassie said quickly. ‘I worked with him on the backdrops.’
‘Why don’t you call him over?’ Mrs Shields said.
‘Yeah, Cass.’ Andrew winked at his sister. ‘Let’s meet the boy who can make you blush that much.’
‘Andrew!’ Cassie frowned at him, but gestured at Scott to join us. ‘Scott, I’d like you to meet my parents,’ she said.
‘Nice to meet you, Mr and Mrs Shields,’ Scott said, and shook their hands with a genuine smile. But as he turned towards Andrew the smile became slightly forced.
‘And my brother, Andrew,’ Cassie said.
‘Your brother?’ Scott’s wary look fell away and was replaced with a big grin as he pumped Andrew’s hand enthusiastically.
Suddenly I knew why Scott Ryder had been acting so strangely for the past fortnight.
‘Scott thought Andrew was your boyfriend!’ I whispered to Cassie as we headed for our parents’ cars. Jelena, Sara and Lindsay were still taking care of things backstage.
‘What?’ Cassie stumbled slightly on the car-park gravel.
‘Careful, honey,’ Mrs Shields said. ‘The ground’s a bit uneven here.’
‘He saw you get on Andrew’s bike that day we tailed him to his sculpture class.’ I grinned. ‘And presumed you and Andrew were dating.’
‘WHAT?’ Cassie yelped, looking at Andrew in horror.
I laughed. ‘That’s why he was so odd around you. He thought he’d made a fool of himself by sending you a rose when you were already attached.’
‘So the whole mess-up was to do with my brother,’ Cassie groaned.
‘It wasn’t Andrew’s fault,’ I reminded her. ‘Anyway, it explains the non-kiss — that’s why Scott cried, “I can’t do this!” and raced off. But now that he knows you’re single, I bet my left arm there’s going to be some K-I-S-S-I-N-G going on soon!’
Cassie grabbed my hand and we joyfully skipped past the adults.
‘Aurora, I know you said you didn’t want to talk about it, but how are you really feeling about Hayden not kissing you?’
I stopped skipping. ‘Dad’s starting up the car. I’d better get going before Ms DeForest convinces him to leave me behind.’
‘But, Aurora, I can tell you’re feeling —’
I jumped into the backseat, cutting her off with the slam of my door.
‘So, where to, future-Academy-Award-winning daughter?’ the NAD asked as he pulled out of the car park. ‘Shall we get a post-celebratory drink — meaning a mocktail, of course — or stop for ice-cream?’
I saw Ms DeForest, who was sitting in the front passenger seat, frown. ‘But, Kenneth, you promised me you’d come to the moonlight gathering up on the headland.’
I imagined the NAD in druid’s attire, battling the coastal winds as he took part in a chanting circle.
‘I thought we could go for a quick drink before dropping Aurora off,’ he said.
‘But then we’ll miss the induction. We’ve already been to the play; I’m sure Aurora won’t mind if you and I have some personal time this evening.’
‘We could make it a very quick drink,’ I suggested.
I didn’t mean to be insistent, but I did want to spend some time with Dad. I’d hardly seen him during the madness of rehearsals over the last month.
‘I’m sure you don’t mind.’ Ms DeForest turned in her seat to give me a sharp look. That look was dangerous. If I wanted the car ride to stay harmonious, I’d better play it safe.
‘Well, I guess not,’ I said.
‘Fabulous!’ Ms DeForest said, reaching for the NAD’s left hand. ‘So it’s back to your house, Kenneth, to drop off Aurora, and then on to the gathering.’
‘Well, I feel kind of bad about taking Aurora straight home,’ Dad said, looking at me in the rear-view mirror. ‘I know! I’ll pull into that ice-creamery coming up. Aurora, pick the most decadent sundae you can think of as a reward for that fabulous show. Wasn’t it great, Dana?’ He turned to smile at Ms DeForest.
‘Well, I suppose it could be considered entertaining,’ she replied, tossing her long brown ringlets. ‘But it was completely devoid of any real message. In my opinion, theatre should address issues.’
‘But it did address quite a few,’ I said. ‘Mr Peterman set the play in the fifties to highlight male–female power dynamics then and now. He was asking the audience to consider how far we’ve really come —’
Ms DeForest let out a laugh. ‘Oh, you can’t really believe that piece of fluff actually made the audience think!’
‘It might have.’ I tried to keep the edge out of my voice. Piece of fluff? You could say the same about her lessons. ‘And I don’t see the problem with theatre being enjoyable.’
‘Well, you wouldn’t, would you?’ Ms DeForest said. ‘You’re a teenager. Life is all about enjoyment. None of you worry about anything beyond your own little world.’
I felt the seatbelt tighten as my chest swelled with barely repressed indignation. ‘That’s a bit of an assumption. And Shakespeare’s work is hardly fluff.’
‘Well, you’re entitled to your opinion.’ Ms DeForest sniffed. ‘Not that I expected anything revolutionary from an overindulged teenager.’
A what?
The NAD looked from Ms DeForest to me and back again with concern. ‘Now, girls …’
‘You probably shouldn’t call Ms DeForest a girl, Dad.’ The words shot from my mouth like a charging army. ‘Seeing as she’s aeons away from being mistaken for an overindulged teenager.’
‘Aurora, you will not speak to Dana like that — damn it!’ the NAD yelled. I jumped in my seat. ‘I missed the exit for the ice-creamery.’
‘Don’t worry about it,’ I muttered. ‘I’m more than ready to go home.’
I leapt out of the car the moment it pulled into the drive. ‘Have a nice evening,’ I said, feigning politeness. The NAD was obviously on edge.
I stomped up the stairs to my room. If Ms DeForest was going to call me an overindulged teenager, then I might as well act like one.
As I threw myself down on my window seat, a flash of headlights caught my eye. The Parises were arriving home. The mood in their car would be joyful, I was sure, not sickeningly tense like my ride home.
I shut my curtains, but I couldn’t shut off my thoughts. Now that I was alone, the autopilot mode I’d been in since the end of the Beatrice–Benedick confession scene dropped away. Why hadn’t Hayden kissed me? What had stopped him?
Like I’d told my friends, I’d got my wish. I’d escaped the kiss. And, as I’d heard Mr Peterman raving to Hayden about the ‘beautiful delicacy’ of the kiss on the hand, it was safe to say that the scene would stay the way it was and my first kiss was once again mine to keep. I should have been dancing around the room in delirious happiness. But all I felt was confusion.
How had I gone from being so vehemently against the kiss to accepting it? Perhaps even more than accepting it, if I dared to be honest with myself.
Hayden’s eyes … the burning way he’d said ‘I love you’ to Beatrice … It had been like getting too close to an actual fire — I’d started melting inside, transfixed by Hayden’s face. And then the heat had consumed me, and I’d given myself up to its intensity, allowing it to transform me into someone who wasn’t Aurora Skye at all. Someone impulsive and reckless, someone who leapt off cliffs without hesitation. Someone whose face had probably screamed, ‘Kiss me! Kiss me!’
I buried my face in a cushion. My embarrassment was colossal. Could Hayden have seen this abandonment of reason? Oh my god! Was that the reason he hadn’t kissed me? Had he backed off because he was terrified by my wild, all-consuming passion?
I let out a shriek and tossed the cushion in the air. It landed on my bed and Snookums, who’d been snoozing on the quilt cover, let out an outraged meow.
‘Sorry, Snookums!’
I had to get a grip on myself. All-consuming passion? Hardly. Okay, so I might have gone a bit silly and momentarily thought I wanted to kiss him — but who could blame me? Just about any girl would have felt the same if she’d heard him making wildly romantic statements in that deep voice of his and he’d looked at her with those eyes …
‘Get a grip, get a grip, get a grip!’ I cried as Hayden’s face flashed up before me again.
But my mind wasn’t listening to common sense. It was running away, down treacherous trails, crying, You can’t catch me.
Maybe he finds you unattractive, it called back to me in a singsong voice.
I felt like I’d been punched in the stomach. No, he couldn’t think that. He’d told me this very evening that I was ‘exquisite’. Hadn’t he meant it?
This was ridiculous. What did I care if Hayden Paris found me attractive or not?
I let out a laugh, suddenly realising how stupid the whole thing was. I was asking myself the very questions that I’d been terrified of inducing in Hayden by knocking back his kiss. Another moment and I would be wondering if I had bad breath!
I grabbed my imagination by the scruff of the neck and shoved it firmly back in its box. Then I walked over to my pyjama drawer. I needed rest. No way were thoughts of Hayden Paris going to make me lose sleep.
‘Are you okay, Aurora?’ Cassie asked me the following evening at six o’clock.
‘I’m great!’ I stifled a yawn. ‘Raring to go.’
‘It looked like you were nodding off.’
‘Cass, how on earth could I fall asleep in one of these impossibly uncomfortable backstage chairs?’
I was secretly asking myself the same question. Obviously when a person had suffered insomnia all the preceding night, involuntary lapses into unconsciousness were to be expected. I’d managed to block Hayden out of my thoughts, but not my own mortifying ‘kiss me, kiss me’ reaction. I’d finally dropped off at 4 am after deciding that it was a sign of my improved thespian skills.
‘I’m going to get you a coffee anyway,’ Cassie said, and returned several moments later with a steaming mug.
‘Thanks.’ I swallowed the bitter liquid gratefully. ‘So, any news on the Scott front?’
Cassie blushed slightly. ‘We just went for coffee down the road.’
So that was where she’d disappeared to. ‘And?’ I asked, feeling more awake as my curiosity kicked in.
‘And he held my hand,’ Cassie whispered, sounding ecstatic.
‘I told you!’ I cried. ‘Oh, this is the best thing that ever happened!’
Now that my worries about the kiss were over, I lived it up onstage. I put all my energy into telling Shakespeare’s story — about two enemies who fall in love, one innocent girl, two bumbling law-enforcement officers, a prince and a world of grand balls and fun times. I tried several times to spot my mother in the audience but the lights were too bright. I really hoped she was enjoying it. I sent my best smiles to her section of the audience, knowing even if I couldn’t see her she’d be able to see me.
Thankfully my stage fright had completely disappeared. I felt heady, like all my senses were enhanced. I never wanted the play to be over.
‘Man, I can’t wait for this play to be over,’ Alex said during intermission.
He, Jelena, Cassie, Sara and I stood in the backstage kitchen, which was a hub of excitement.
‘Why?’ I asked.
‘Claire Linden — she’s so self-righteous. When I dance with her, she holds herself at a distance like I’ve got cooties or something. Talk about juvenile. I figure she has a thing for me.’
I noticed Jelena’s paper cup of Coke was compressing dangerously in her left hand.
‘And is put out that I’m dating the hottest girl in school,’ Alex finished, wrapping his arm around Jelena’s waist. Her grip on her cup relaxed.
‘I think Claire’s just a bit shy,’ I said.
Alex snickered. ‘Socially impaired is another way to put it. She’s a bit of a freak. She has this huge book called Shakespeare: The Invention of the Human that she carts around with her all the time.’
I owned that book! The author, Harold Bloom, was a god.
‘She probably sleeps with it at night,’ Alex said scornfully. ‘Well, you can’t blame her. It’s the closest thing she’s going to get to a boyfriend. She hasn’t got a lot going on in this department.’ He pointed at his chest.
‘Tell me about it!’ Jelena gave a tinkling laugh. ‘Ever heard of a push-up bra?’
‘Jelena!’ I cried.
‘Ever heard of a plastic surgeon?’ Alex laughed along with Jelena. ‘We should use the profits from the play to set up a breast-job fund. Hers are barely more than mosquito bites.’
To my horror, I realised Claire was standing just to our right, her eyes brimming with tears. She turned and dashed away.
‘She just heard you!’ I grabbed Jelena’s arm and pointed at Claire’s rapidly retreating figure.
Alex shrugged. ‘She needed to hear the truth sometime. Maybe it’ll inspire her to start saving for the surgery.’
I felt like slapping him. Instead, I dashed after Claire, Cassie and Sara at my heels.
‘I can’t believe you let him get away with saying those things,’ I told Jelena when we ran into her outside the women’s bathroom ten minutes later. ‘I only just managed to get Claire to stop crying.’
Sara glared at Jelena. ‘She not only let him get away with it, she encouraged him. How could you, Jelena?’
Jelena shrugged. ‘What was I supposed to do?’
‘Uh, not join in?’ Sara suggested.
‘Maybe you could get Alex to apologise,’ Cassie said as we walked back into the kitchen.
‘Apologise?’ Jelena gaped at her. ‘Oh, come on. It’s not that big a deal.’
‘Not a big deal?’ I cried. ‘You just crushed Claire’s feelings!’
‘She was asking for it, going after my boyfriend.’ Jelena took an unconcerned sip of her drink.
I remembered the way Alex had behaved around Claire at the beginning of rehearsals — grabbing her around the waist, stroking her arm. She’d been the one resisting him, not the other way around.
‘I don’t think she was going after him, Jelena —’
I stopped as Alex came back. He slung an arm around Jelena and me. ‘How’s cry-baby Claire?’
I pulled myself out from under his arm. ‘You really hurt her feelings.’
‘Oh, relax, Aurora.’ Alex slung his arm around me again. ‘There’s nothing wrong with reminding people like Claire that she’s dreaming if she wants to hang out with or date people like us. I might have said it a little harshly, but it’s true.’
‘I’d hang out with her,’ I said.
‘Yeah, she’s probably more fun to hang out with than you and your elitist attitude,’ Sara muttered underneath her breath.
I tried to push away the growing uneasiness I felt about Alex and got ready to go back onstage.
The rest of the play raced along. Claudio grieved at Hero’s tomb when he realised his mistake in accusing an innocent woman; the marriage of a reborn Hero and suitably ashamed Claudio took place; Beatrice and Benedick once again tried to pretend they didn’t care about each other, but their friends soon exposed them by forging love letters from one to the other.
‘Here’s our own hands against our hearts,’ Hayden said, slipping his hand in mine. ‘Come, I will have thee; but, by this light, I take thee for pity.’
‘I would not deny you,’ I replied, ‘but, by this good day, I yield upon great persuasion; and partly to save your life, for I was told you were in a consumption.’ I grinned cheekily at him.
Hayden was meant to say, ‘Peace, I will stop your mouth’, and kiss me, but on the first day of rehearsals Sara had kicked up such a huge stink about men silencing women that Mr Peterman had actually cut the line. Instead, we all broke into a dance and cheered when a messenger told us that Don John had been captured.
And then it was over, and we were all linking hands and giving a bow. As I stepped forward, rows of people stood up.
‘A standing ovation! Well done, Princess!’ Hayden said.
Of course, he nearly brought the house down.
Just as I thought to look for my mother, the curtain fell.
‘Party time!’ Jeffrey yelled, and raced off into the wings.
I pushed my way through the throngs of people in the audience, searching for my mother. After ten minutes of being crushed like a grape in a wine press, I decided to give up on my search till the crowd had thinned out a little. I’d use the time to change into my dress for the afterparty. Inspired by my secret admirer’s poem, I’d chosen a dress that twinkled with silver sequins, like a sky full of stars. I slipped it on, along with delicate silver heels, and headed back into the almost empty auditorium. Most of the parents had headed out towards their cars, so I made my way outside, passing groups of chattering parents, searching for Mum.
Before long the autumn air nipped at my bare arms, so I retreated inside, taking a seat on the stage where it would be easy for her to spot me. She’d probably got caught up talking to someone — she loved socialising. Several people walked by and looked at me curiously, likely wondering why I was all dressed up and sitting on an empty stage. I made a show of looking at my watch.
Thirty minutes later, the auditorium was empty except for a janitor sweeping the rubbish from the aisles.
‘Aurora,’ someone called, and I turned my eyes away from the auditorium’s entrance.
Hayden walked across the stage from the wings. ‘What are you doing here? Wow.’ He took in my dress. ‘That’s a show stopper of an outfit.’
‘Thanks. Listen, have you seen my mum? I still haven’t found her.’
Hayden frowned. ‘No. Do you think she could have gone backstage to meet you? Do you want to go look?’
He offered me his arm, and I noticed that he was wearing a black suit with a white collared shirt, no tie. Being Hayden Paris, he looked exactly right. I slipped my arm through his and the tense feeling in my stomach relaxed slightly.
We walked through the backstage area, which was virtually deserted. Still no sign of Mum. I didn’t understand it. Where on earth could she be?
‘How about the party?’ Hayden said. ‘I know it’s a long shot, but several parents showed up earlier, much to Jelena’s horror.’
I forced a laugh. ‘What did she do?’
‘Marched over and demanded that they leave.’
Hayden’s words were drowned out as we entered the gym. One of Jelena’s many admirers was acting as DJ and electro music dominated the room, reverberating through the floor. Jelena, wearing an amazing red backless dress, was dancing with Alex. Cassie and Scott were gliding in each other’s arms, completely oblivious to the music’s frantic pulse. Tyler and Lindsay were pulling silly dance moves. Jeffrey was dancing on a tabletop.
‘I’ll check the perimeter, you check the dance floor!’ Hayden yelled over the music.
I pushed away my doubts that my mother would be on the dance floor with a bunch of teenagers and threw myself into the crowd.
Jelena glided over to me. ‘Aurora! How do I look?’
‘Like a siren,’ I said. Her hair fell in long black waves and her lips were the same scarlet as her dress. ‘Look, my mum didn’t happen to be one of the parents you turned away before?’
Jelena blinked. ‘No. Hey, Alex is the best dancer!’
She sent a little wave to him across the room.
‘Jelena, are you sure that Alex is the guy you think he is —’ I started, then stopped as Lindsay and Tyler’s song began playing.
‘Oh, gag me,’ Jelena said as Tyler fell to his knees in front of a laughing Lindsay and started singing the words.
I smiled distractedly, still searching the crowd for Mum. A moment later, Hayden arrived at my side, shaking his head.
‘No sign of her. Have you checked your mobile?’ he asked.
‘No.’ I pulled it out of my handbag, feeling like the stupidest person ever. I’d turned it off during the play so I’d be free from distractions.
‘Well, there’s your answer. She’s bound to have left a message about where to meet you.’
I switched on my phone and saw I had a new text message.
Can’t make it to the play. Wooing the developers is taking longer than expected. Sorry, Mum.
I thrust the phone at Hayden and dashed towards the exit. I needed air.
‘Aurora, wait!’
Hayden caught up with me as I stumbled out onto the grass.
‘I’m such an idiot,’ I choked. ‘It never occurred to me that she just wouldn’t show up.’
I sank to my knees on the grass, feeling sick as I remembered how I’d smiled my brightest smiles onstage, thinking that she was there in the audience.
‘I sat in the empty auditorium for half an hour after the show finished. Anyone else would have started getting suspicious, but not me. Oh no. I thought, maybe she’s gone to the bathroom.’ I gave a bitter laugh. ‘Idiot.’
‘She’s the idiot for not coming,’ Hayden said, his voice harsher than I’d ever heard it. For some reason, it made me feel slightly better. He knelt down beside me.
‘I wanted her to be there,’ I said. It was hard to get the words out past the lump in my throat. ‘I don’t know why, because she was gone for four years and she missed all sorts of things. But for some reason, I really cared this time.’
‘Of course you did.’ Hayden squeezed my shoulders. ‘I mean, I get embarrassed about my mum’s enthusiasm — she videotaped the play twice.’
I gave a hiccupy laugh.
‘But if she didn’t show up, I know I’d be crushed.’
‘I just wanted her to see it.’ I shook my head. ‘I wanted her to see Cassie’s backdrops, and Lindsay’s costumes, and you and me onstage.’
‘Your world,’ Hayden said softly.
It was as if he’d reached inside me to find a truth that I hadn’t been able to see for myself. A sense of being completely and utterly understood fell over me, and for some reason the lump in my throat became even bigger. Oh no. I wasn’t going to cry. I hadn’t cried when she’d left. I’d forced myself to stay strong for the shattered NAD. No way was her failure to show up to a play going to cause me to lose it now.
I pulled myself up off the ground. ‘Hayden?’ I forced my voice to stay steady. ‘I’m going to call a cab.’
‘You don’t want to go to the party?’
I shook my head. ‘I’m not really in a partying mood.’
‘Okay, no party,’ he said. ‘But I can’t let the star actress go home without celebrating. How about we go into the city?’
I glanced at his concerned face. And found myself agreeing.
