Kane’s like my brother and his words definitely took me by surprise. He never expressed those true feelings towards me or concerning accusations. And out of all places and times, he decides right now is the best moment to explode. I feel betrayed. Betrayed that he would ever throw something that heavy in my face. Paul’s death.
I stand there, breathing heavily, my chest moving forward and back. Staring hard at Kane, my eyes narrow and my whole body goes stiff. Kane looks back at me with regret in his eyes and he knows, he fucked up. He couldn’t hold my gaze anymore and lets his head fall down, looking at the floor. His elbows now resting on his lap.
‘What does he mean?’ Ari’s voice trembling. I look at her, my blood still boiling, rage filling every single vein in my body, but most of all, pain.
I carry the guilt of Paul’s death every single day. Maybe that’s why I can’t be around Ari. I couldn’t kiss her or hold her knowing I felt responsible for her brother not coming back home.
‘Hello? Is anybody going to say anything?’ She asks again but she’s only returned with silence. Tears slowly fall out of her eyes, impatience written all over her face. She starts to walk back towards the door, giving us a defeated nod. She understands no one is going to say anything. She turns on her heels and rushes out of the room.
‘For fucks sake, I’m trying to get some rest,’ Rooker groans, facepalming his forehead.
‘I’m not out of the woods yet and I already wanna go at BOTH of your throats. Do I have to get out of this bed and chase Ari down myself? The poor girl deserves to know now that Slaughter let it slip and it should come from you.’ Rooker roars but he points his finger at me.
I shake my head, rubbing my hand through my beard. I feel horrible that Kane and I are stressing him out like this.
‘Fuck, man I apologize… I’ll get outta your hair, let your wife know you’re not dead? She almost had a heart attack when she saw that I was calling.’ I tell him sternly as I start to make my way out of the room.
‘Grim,’ Kane calls out, looking up at me now, instead of the floor. My eyes locked into his, blazing with fury. I could see red again, blocking my vision as I stare Kane down before completely turning around towards the door to our room. I don’t have time for his bullshit. I have to find Ari now.
‘Rider man, I’m sorry,’ I hear Kane call out over my shoulder, pleading. But I’m already out the door, moving fast. His tone’s full of remorse. He crossed a fucking line and I wasn’t sure if I would ever forgive him for that.
I start to get stiff. This isn’t a conversation I want to have with Ari. This isn’t a conversation I want to have with anyone. Yet, here I was running through the halls with Ari nowhere in sight. I run into another nurse, her name tag reads, Lori.
‘Hi, uh, Lori?’ I startle the poor girl, her eyes widening confused as to why a random man was moving frantically in the ER hallways.
‘Yes, can I help you?’ Lori frowns, side-eyeing me.
‘The nurse Ari, where can I find her?’
Relief in her breath, probably from the realization I’m not going to hurt her or that I’m some crazy patient on the loose.
‘She left already, her shift is over. It’s five in the morning.’ Lori says, looking down at her watch, yawning.
‘Dammit… where’s she staying?’
Lori hesitates, her eyebrows furrow studying me. I was starting to grow impatient.
‘I’m not sure if I feel comfortable giving you that information.’
‘Lori, I’ve had a very long night. An exhausting one. Long story short, I almost lost one of my men tonight. She helped save him. And all I want to do is show her my gratitude.’ It was a lie. But not a complete lie. I palm my chest, leaning forward.
‘Fine.’
