‘It’s something I don’t tell anyone on the first date.’ He sighs.
Oh.
He’s a SEAL just like Paul?
My heart skips a beat. I can feel my cheeks getting hot and I’m blushing. I let my hair fall over my cheeks as I turn away from him so he can’t see my face. I’ve never felt this way with any guy ever. No one has made me feel so alive before and we barely know each other. This was a first for me.
‘So why the Navy?’ I ask softly. I wanted to continue the conversation and break from my awkwardness. I truly wanted to know more about Danny. He was one of my brother’s closest friends. I didn’t think I could like him even more in such a short amount of time, but this changed everything. The fact he was associated with my brother made me more comfortable around him. It made me feel like he was no longer a stranger.
‘Well, my father was a SEAL, so it was up to me to carry on the family tradition.’ I watched his jaw clench at the words, family tradition. Something about the way he said it made me feel like there was animosity towards his family.
‘I also just want to be a part of the best team in the world and kill bad guys. Simple. As. That.’
‘How many deployments have you already done?’ I ask curious. Danny looks at me, his face hardens, and he stares into my soul again.
‘Seven.’
I look back at him and I can tell there was more to his words. There was pain underneath the stone-cold emotionless face he was using as a mask. I so badly wanted to reach out and grab ahold of his hand and give him a gentle squeeze… but, I held myself back.
‘How long were these deployments?’
‘They all varied. The longest was a year. They can go from three months to a year, just depends’
Geez.
‘And how long are you leaving for, this time around?’ I was hoping he would say a few weeks only. Wishful thinking. I just met such an amazing guy and he was leaving already. This night was probably our last together unless we kept in touch somehow.
‘I don’t know,’ Danny says. He stands up and walks back to the kitchen and pours a large amount of whiskey back into his glass. The thunder outside keeps getting louder and more consistent. Lightning flashed through the windows, lighting up the house with blue rays of light. The temperature in the house feels like it’s dropping even more due to the strong cold winds. Either way, I can’t help but notice Danny keeps the inside of his house cold; I was freezing.
I decide to follow him over to the kitchen, hoping every stride would warm me up. I sit down on a bar stool at the kitchen island that’s between us. The island was a beautiful rustic wooden color.
‘Do you drink a lot? Often?’
Danny smirks. I can feel myself getting hot. Even his smirk was so damn gorgeous.
‘Is every weekend considered a lot?’ Danny chuckles.
‘Umm, maybe?’ I wasn’t a drinker. I only drank on special occasions. So every weekend did seem like a lot to me. But I don’t blame him for drinking often. His job seems like it’s a stressful one to have. I can only imagine all the trauma he’s already been through with all of the deployments and losing a close friend on one of them… my brother.
‘How old are you?’
‘Thirty-three.’
Why am I so attracted to that?
‘You?’
‘Twenty-two.’
‘So why did you choose nursing as a career?’
That’s an easy question.
‘Because I want to help people. I want to help people that can’t help themselves. I want to save people that can’t save themselves…’ I swallow the lump in my throat. ‘Like Paul.’ My voice comes out dry and hoarse.
Danny looks at me and his eyes soften. He glances at the windows outside watching the trees sway like they’re about to snap.
‘Paul was an amazing big brother. We were supposed to go to the upcoming Bloomings Author Event, together.’
Danny turns again toward me and I can tell it makes him uncomfortable when I bring up Paul.
‘The weather’s getting even worst,’ Danny mutters after taking another drink of his whiskey. He changes the subject and I don’t blame him. The hurricane was about to roll in and I didn’t want to leave. My heart drops and my smile fades. I didn’t want to go home just yet but I knew it was getting dangerous outside. I just didn’t know how I would be getting home since Danny drove me here.
‘Yeah, it is.’
An awkward silence fills the room. Thunder was the only sound filling the silence every second. I look up at Danny and he’s staring at me. I blush. I can’t handle the way this man looks at me.
‘How could you read me so well at El Devine? How could you tell that I’m… broken?’ He turns towards me, giving me his full attention. His Adam’s apple bobs down as he swallows more of his drink.
‘You wear your heart on your sleeve.’
‘That obvious huh?’ How embarrassing. I need to learn how to control my face.
‘Don’t be ashamed of that. That’s what makes you, you. Not many people do that anymore in this fucked up world. It’s rare and I think that’s my favorite thing about you so far. You’re rare.’
I’m stunned. He looks at me with such intensity, unfaltering seriousness and I’m breaking. The chemistry between us is undying. It keeps getting stronger the longer I’m close to him. I’m holding my breath and my heart pounds. I can’t believe he makes me feel this way. Light starts to flicker and the tension rises in between us as he walks closer to me.
‘So… ever kill anyone?’ I softly chuckle, awkwardly. Way to break the ice, Ari.
As soon as the question left my lips, I wanted to slap my forehead. What a stupid question. What a terrible joke. I shake my head, aggressively looking away from him, gritting my teeth.
Danny sighs.
‘Not today.” He grins before continuing.
“Ari, didn’t Paul tell you to never ask those questions? Tsk, tsk, tsk.’
‘I’m sorry. Stupid question…’ I look down at my phone, opening my Uber app. I’m desperate to get away from him after revealing my horrible social skills. I’m mortified I need to go home.
Forget that I need to relocate to a different state.
What is wrong with me?
‘I should go, I’ll find a ride home on the Uber app. The storm’s rolling in and I don’t want to keep you from preparing for your deployment,’ I say, faking the hardest smile I could throw on. I stand up walking towards the entryway to his front door, every step is fast and desperate.
Stupid question. Way to embarrass myself. I haven’t been on a date in a long time. I’m extremely rusty on my flirting and apparently social skills.
I’m halfway to his front door when his hand catches mine, spinning me around into him slowly. My face meets his chest, and I look up at him nervously.
My heart is beating so hard I wonder if he can hear it. His touch always sends electrifying heat into me. I look back at his hand, his skin rough on my palm.
‘Don’t go.’ He looks down at me, his other hand still holding onto his whiskey.
‘My flight got canceled, remember? I won’t be leaving tomorrow after all, at least until the hurricane clears. And I highly doubt any Ubers will be accepting any requests given the weather…’
The smell of his cologne traps me in a frozen state since our bodies were almost touching. It’s such a unique sexy smell and I want to smother myself into his shirt.
‘So…’ I swallow, anxiously. ‘What are you implying?’ It came out almost a whisper.
I knew what he was implying. He wants me to stay the night. I never did one-night stands, that was never my thing. I wasn’t that type of girl, not that there’s nothing wrong with it. I just wasn’t comfortable doing that… yet why was I hoping that I would be underneath him naked tonight? The thought of us both naked sends me into a mess of emotions. I feel ashamed of my lust. I felt shame for thinking such an intimate thought and a large part of me didn’t care.
I bite my lip, looking up at Danny. Danny’s jaw clenches as he looks at my lips. I can feel the tension between us and it excites me.
‘I think you should stay the night because of the hurricane, I guess we didn’t really think this through…’ he lets go of my hand and massages the back of his neck.
Thunder erupts and the lights begin to flicker on and off.
‘Yeah, I think so too…’ I breathe. Our bodies were almost touching.
Our eyes lock into each other and I feel him leaning in more towards me, closing the distance, slowly.
I can’t handle it. I can’t handle the fire that’s blazing in between my thighs, and I want to run. I’m so shy and I hate myself for it.
“How tall are you by the way?” I blurt out, stopping him from getting closer. Danny’s face softens.
“6’6.”
I look at him, really looked at him and I can see a scar peeking out of the sleeve of his shirt. I lift my hand to it, touching it.
‘Oh… is this a scar? How’d you get this?’ I ask, intrigued. Danny looks down at my hand trailing his scar. That’s when I see a glimpse of the scar’s length. It didn’t end there; it looks like it keeps going but I can’t see where.
‘On one of the deployments… with Paul actually.’ Danny laughs as he watches my hand on his tricep.
‘Can I see how far it goes?’ I ask curiosity gnawing at me. Danny shrugs, drinking more of his whiskey, then placing his glass down on a nearby table. I was confused, all he had to do was lift his slee—
Oh…
I was not expecting Danny to slip his shirt off over his head. The shirt brushes over his dark, sandy blonde hair. I was now facing his very well-toned, tattooed back. The scar went from his shoulder blade all the way down to the back of his tricep, like someone had slashed him with a knife, diagonally. He has a massive realistic-looking tattoo of a Grim Reaper engraved in flames all over his back. Whoever the tattoo artist was did a perfect job well done. It looks so detailed like a photograph. Finally, I get a full view of his half sleeve. There are angels with wings and demons wrapped into each other tattooed beautifully on his arm.
I walk closer to him, eyeing his sun-kissed tan skin. I looked at him for permission with my eyes before I touched the scar, again.
‘May I?’
Danny nods.
I touch the scar following it up to his right shoulder. The scar feels soft underneath my fingertips.
‘How’d you get it?’ I ask. I can’t imagine being wounded like this. The pain, the stories, and the injuries he carries due to these deployments. I wanted to know them all. I start to feel myself going sad knowing he had suffered through pain. Every piece of evidence on his body looks like he’s been through hell.
‘I don’t want to dampen tonight with those stories… so I won’t share, for your sake.’ He says putting his shirt back on. My heart sinks a little, I shouldn’t pry like this, but I respect his decision.
‘Oh… okay I get it.’ I half-smile.
‘It’s just I don’t think it would do any good sharing it but maybe one day soon.’ He says as he starts to walk away from me. My heart jumps a little with giddy at the thought of us continuing to hang out.
Danny reaches out for my hand and I grab it. He leads me back into the living room. I sit down on the couch and cross my legs together as Danny grabs the TV remote and turns it on, flipping through the channels.
‘I want an update on the weather.’
‘Good idea. I’ve got to check in with my mom. See how she’s doing.’ I take my phone out of my pocket and send her a text.
Danny’s still standing in front of me, watching the weather channel and I’m internally freaking out. I’m going to spend the night with one of my brother’s friends. It feels so wrong to be here. I feel like I’m pushing my boundaries for the first time in a long time and I’m secretly loving it. Either way, my mom must be so worried about me since I haven’t returned home. I’m puzzled by the fact she hasn’t been harassing me yet.
Mom, everything okay? I’m staying the night with him because of the hurricane. I should be back home tomorrow when the hurricane has already passed through.
I wonder how she’s going to react to me telling her that I’m staying the night with a guy I barely know. I bite my lip, nervous. My mom replies two minutes later. I’m bouncing my knee up and down, awaiting her response.
MOM: Everything is good. That’s the smartest thing to do right now. Stay with Danny until the hurricane passes. By the way, I recognized him. He’s one of Paul’s friends from the military. I knew he looked familiar.
Great. Am I the only one who didn’t know Danny? My family has met him before me.
ME: Wait. How do you know him?
‘Damn, the hurricane still hasn’t weakened, but it will soon.’ Danny’s voice interrupts my thoughts and I set my phone down. I looked back at him as he bends down to sit next to me. Then I was hit by his cologne scent again and I melted. His smell was so good.
MOM: Paul would send text me pictures when he was gone mija. Danny appeared in them sometimes.
I smile before turning my phone off.
‘Oh wow. That’s not good.’ I look at the news reporter across the TV screen. It was a man underneath an umbrella, near the beach of the Carolinas where the hurricane was approaching. Winds are picking up and rain falls hard onto the news reporter as he delivers information on what’s happening on the beach. He’s yelling at his microphone trying not to get drowned out by the noise of high winds and crashing rain. I found humor in watching the reporter struggle to stay in place as the strong winds kept pushing him over.
I can’t hold it in any longer, so I start laughing. Maybe, it’s the alcohol getting to me already.
‘What’s so funny?’ Danny asks. I meet his gaze and he brightens with admiration. He’s admiring me as half of his lips turn into a smile that causes me to paralyze by the overwhelming attention.
‘I will never understand why news reporters put themselves in a dangerous situation like this just to tell us how dangerous it is to be outside, and that we should evacuate the area. It’s just silly and hypocritical.”
Danny laughs as he sits down close to me, “You’re not wrong.’
We both start to laugh hard and for the first time in a while, I look at Danny and all I feel is pure bliss since my brother’s passing.
Danny and I look at each other as our laughter dies down. His gorgeous blue eyes stare into mine. His hand brushes over his beard as I feel that sweet moment full of tension again. Him having known Paul, makes me feel even more comfortable with him than I already was. To me, he wasn’t a complete stranger after all. An uncomfortable feeling tugs below my stomach. I look down and I can feel myself blushing. My heart rate picks up and I start biting the inside of my lip, gently out of anxiety.
I look back at him and he’s moved even closer to my face. He leans in more and so do I. His eyes are looking at my lips and I know what’s coming. I close my eyes and he closes the gap between us with his lips. As soon as our lips touch, a storm of emotions rocks me. His kiss is so gentle, it’s consuming me. Our lips brush each other softly and I swear I can see stars in the dark.
Then he changes the pace by speeding it up. It goes to an aggressive, hard, I need you right now, kiss. His tongue brushes against my lip waiting for me to return it with mine and I immediately react. Our tongues thrash against each other and he tastes so damn good. Cigarettes and whiskey. I’m in shock at how much I’m enjoying swallowing his taste. His right-hand cups the side of my head bringing me even closer to him and he’s brushing his thumb back and forth on my cheek.
Then, he’s rougher. He squeezes my hair tight, pulling it down so I’m now facing the ceiling and he starts biting on my neck, hard. It causes me pain but not enough for me to break away.
I’m scared. But… not of him. I’m scared that the pain arouses me, and I’m conflicted within myself. I close my eyes as his lips and teeth suck on my neck. Then, he trails kisses down my chest. Arousal creeps down into my bones, my clit throbbing for his touch. I could feel his facial hair poking into me and I’m enjoying it. I smile as he worships my body.
I didn’t know this night was going to go this way at all and I was enjoying every second of it. His hand lets go of my face and goes for my shirt instead. My chest tightens and I don’t know how to feel. His hand slowly begins to undress me by pulling my shirt up a bit. I’ve never felt more alive in my life. As soon as his hand touches the skin of my stomach the hairs on my skin stand up. My entire body erupts in goosebumps. He reaches for the clips of my bra and unhooks it with one hand. He lightly pushes my chest down and I obediently follow his lead. My hair falls to the side, a low moan slips away from my lips, and Danny hums. He lifts my shirt upwards just below my chin, not fully unclothing me. I react so fast, holding my forearms over my hard nipples.
Danny takes notice, his eyebrows raising.
‘Ari, is this your first time?’
I freeze. It’s that obvious?
His elbows rest on the couch, keeping his weight off me. He’s on top of me, and I can feel his thick, solid bulge against the inside of my thighs through his jeans. I’m instantly nervous and my breathing quickens, my hands grow clammy and I feel like I’m in a fantasy. I’ve never felt so sure about this in my life, yet I was so nervous. The way Danny makes me feel so sure about the choices I make; I want to hold onto that feeling for eternity.
I bite my lip and nod.
‘Yes.’
His face is only about three inches away from mine. He doesn’t respond. Instead, he looks at me. And I’m looking back at him, into his eyes, getting lost in a trance and it feels like we’re the only two people left in this world. He lifts one of his hands, caressing my cheek, rubbing his thumb over it. I close my eyes and nestle into it, enjoying every fiber of his skin on mine.
‘Don’t hide your beauty away from me. You’re so addicting.’
His words loom over my head and my insecurities fade away, like my morals.
He then removes my forearms away from my breasts and I relax them to my sides. He’s commanding my body with his hands, and I let him. I don’t recognize myself anymore. Danny grabs my cross necklace and pushes it to the side. The cross getting lost in my hair that’s sprawled out on the couch.
He begins to plant kisses around my right breast, and I suck in air as he takes my nipple into his mouth, sucking on it so hard I arch my back begging for more. His teeth bite hard on it, causing such an explosive reaction from me and I moan. My clit pulsating, begging to be touched. Thunder bellows outside as he moves to my other breast and puts it into his mouth again. I feel like I’m as light as a feather and I’m about to fly into a new world of sensuality.
He squeezes my other breast with his hand and then pinches my nipple with his fingers. One breast is being sucked and the other is pinched. Pain and pleasure weren’t something I had ever imagined blending so well with each other, but Danny makes this combination I want to explore.
A moan escapes me and Danny trails his tongue all the way down to my stomach, going over my belly button. He begins to undress my bottoms and I began to pant. My chest jumps up and down with my heavy breathing and I feel my underwear soaking. He pulls my bottoms down leaving my pussy bare. He has his head in between my thighs, throwing them both over his shoulders, pulling my pussy closer to his mouth.
‘Your pussy is so cute. It’s dripping all over for me already. My sweet Cherry.’
Did he just call me Cherry?
‘Please,’ I beg.
Danny grins and doesn’t waste any more time. His hands grip my thighs and my hands come alive going for his soft hair, getting lost in the strands. His tongue starts at my slit, up and down thrusting in a cycle of pure erotic euphoria. Teasing my clit every time he goes upwards. Leaving me yearning for more, then he’s back down in my slit.
‘I could drink you forever Ari, you taste so fucking heavenly.’ He says as I feel his tongue disappear from my slit and instead thrust inside of me and I lose it. His tongue is inside me and I’m enchanted. He’s playing with my clit, circling it with his finger and my legs begin to tremble with pleasure radiating down into my feet. I can’t handle this pleasure, it’s too much. A low scream escapes me and I’m growing disappointed that it’s not his cock.
He stops fucking me with his tongue and starts to play with my clit instead. His tongue makes me forget my own name with the way it’s speaking to my clit and I’m boiling inside, arching my back and pushing his head closer to me until I’m riding his face.
It’s all too much. Then he takes my clit into his mouth, he sucks on me and I cry out of nirvana, not caring who can hear me and I’m breaking, trembling, shattering into an explosion of happiness when my orgasm rips through me.
Danny feels my orgasm and he hums with satisfaction.
Suddenly, a loud vibration from his phone intrudes our enclosed world and Danny stops fucking me with his mouth and lets go of my clit. My head drops down onto the couch when I realize he’s stopped, his attention elsewhere.
I didn’t think I was the type of girl to have sex with a guy she barely knew but with Danny… I felt like I just might become one. I’ve never felt this way with any man. I’ve never connected with someone on so many levels. The age difference was intimidating, and it makes me feel like I was out of my element being with an older man. It felt dangerous, inviting, and tempting.
Both of us breathe hard as we stare at each other, a fire has been ignited between us and I didn’t want it to get put out just yet. His thumb brushes over my lips, and I hear a low, deep frustrated growl coming from Danny’s throat.
‘Sorry about that, I always have to be on alert with my phone.’ Danny turns away from me as he pulls out his phone and I rest on my back to the couch, taking a deep breath in, trying to calm all of my awakened nerves.
I watch Danny as he looks at the screen of his phone and I can tell it wasn’t good since his whole demeanor changed. His jaw clenches, his body stiffens, and he looks upset. My thoughts are scrambling and I’m wondering what could have appeared on his phone for it to kill the mood entirely.
‘What’s wrong?’ I ask.
Danny locks his phone screen and turns to me with a reassuring smile.
‘Nothing,’ a short pause fills the room.
“Work.” He says putting his phone down on the coffee table. Would work really be texting him this late?
I don’t know much about how his job works but what I did know, was that it sounded like a lie.
Lightning strikes close by as I see familiar blue rays flash through the windows again. Thunder follows and growls loudly and the whole house shakes.
‘So—’ I was about to ask if he had a condom before he interrupts me.
‘We should go to sleep. I’ve got to finish up some stuff here and make sure everything’s good to go before I leave for deployment. I’ll sleep on the couch and you can take my bedroom.’ Danny says cutting me off. His voice was curt and cold. He adjusts himself farther away from me on the couch.
My heart drops.
What changed? Was that his girlfriend calling him and not work?
Oh. Gosh. He must have a girlfriend. He’s absolutely gorgeous, why wouldn’t he have one? I should have asked.
Wait.
If he had a girlfriend, why is he kissing me then?
A thousand questions were running through my head, and I need to slow myself down.
I begin to dress myself again pulling up my bottoms and relapsing my bra together.
I look at him, fully clothed again, confused and slightly hurt. Danny finally looks back at me after staring at his phone again. I can tell he knows how I’m feeling. I’m easy to read and it’s one of my flaws I strongly despise.
‘I’m sorry, I just have a lot on my mind.’ Danny says not looking at me.
‘I get that. Trust me I do…’
I was leaving for Iraq very soon. I was extremely nervous and scared. Signing up to work at a hospital overseas to help out our military men like Paul, had me on edge. This night with Danny felt like such an amazing distraction from the stress of it all these past few months.
I felt like I just got rejected when things were going so right between us. My throat feels dry so I look down at the drink I left earlier and drank more, the cold liquid going down my throat. Danny turns to me and he’s staring daggers at me the entire time.
‘I would very much like to fuck you until the sun comes up.’ Danny’s deep husky voice says with confidence. I was not expecting him to be so blunt, so much so…
I started to choke on my drink.
I place my drink down trying to recover from the oxygen that escaped me unexpectedly. Danny pats my back as I swallow the rest of my drink that got stuck in my throat and I regain my breathing. I look back at him, and he’s smirking, devilishly.
I clear my throat.
‘So, why don’t you?’ I tease, my voice low.
‘I can’t.’
‘Why not?’
‘I respect you too much.’
DISRESPECT ME.
Oh, Lord. Where the hell did that come from? The fact that I was so tempted to blurt that out… I’m in shock with myself. My personality and morals change when I’m around him as I’m starting to learn.
‘I respect Paul. I respect your family. And I can’t. The more I get to know you, I know you’re going to want more… and I can’t give you more, this was a mistake.” He rambles. ‘I’m not a relationship guy. I don’t date. I can’t offer you anything more than sex. My job comes first and that’s all I’ve ever known. I won’t change that.’
Danny turns away from me.
‘Let’s get some sleep, I’ll show you to my room and I’ll take you back home in the morning when the hurricane passes.’ Danny gets up from the couch and I feel like I did something wrong.
I take a few seconds to process everything on the couch, I stare at the TV still playing and I’m buried in confusion. I force myself up and catch up to him. He starts to go upstairs, his steps heavy ending with loud thuds, and I quietly follow as I process everything he just told me. The more I processed, the angrier I got.
I mean I wasn’t expecting him to ask me to be in a relationship so soon, we just met for crying out loud. I didn’t want that either. But we’re adults. I knew this was a possibility of where this was going, but I didn’t know that he would cut me off after he got what he wanted from me.
So why did he ask me to come here with him? Was he planning to just fuck me and not speak to me again?
He probably was.
I swallow, anger filling my core. This is why I swore off military men. They’re all the fucking same. I thought he was different. I should have known better. I went from feeling like I knew Danny my entire life to feeling like he was just a beautiful stranger again.
Danny turns on the lights in his bedroom after he opened the door for me to enter. I look around and I can feel myself boiling. It was going to be his last night of fun before he left for deployment.
I was going to be his last night of fun.
Danny didn’t enter the room. He just stands there in the hallway still, with one of his hands in his pockets.
‘If you want to get more comfortable, my clothes are in those drawers over there, you can go through it and pick out whatever you want to sleep in.’
I grab the doorknob and look at him.
I was tired of biting my tongue. Maybe it was the alcohol coating me with bravery but I can’t hold my words back anymore.
‘So, what was this? What was the point of this Danny? I was going to be your one-night stand before you leave on deployment?’
Danny looks at me, defensive.
‘Ari, no, of course, no—’
I close the door on him, not giving him a chance to finish.
