the day with Cash, I hope he had a better time with the guys than I did with the girls. Maybe I should have insisted that he pick me up instead of saying that I was fine with Jana bringing me home after the night was over.
We had a great time watching the movie. It was one of Kade Markson’s movies. Jana and the other girls have a huge crush on him, but he’s not making movies too much anymore since he got married and settled down. They have to get their fix watching his older movies.
He was definitely easy on the eyes, but to me my Cash is way hotter. Once the movie was over, we started eating some junk food, and then the gossip started.
The gossiping part wasn’t too bad. Mostly they talked about different people around town, what’s new, and who is new, that sort of thing. But when the girls started complaining about their boyfriends, then I really wished I could leave.
They complained about how much time they spend on video games and how they leave dirty clothes on the floor when they’re at their place or how they’re always trying to get out of hanging out with family. They didn’t always like their guys’ friends and bitched about their boyfriends wanting to spend time with their friends.
I know that this is what girls do. They need a place to vent maybe get some advice. But I don’t want any part of it, mostly because things with Cash and I are going really well. Also, I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t want us to air our business to people that I barely know. He has no clue who they are. But this town likes to gossip and they sure as hell would take that any information and run with it.
After I finish putting a little curl into my hair, I check the time to find that Cash is about ten minutes late. He’s always early, so it’s a little odd, but I take the extra time to get my boots on and finish packing a little overnight bag. When I’m done, and he’s still not here, I sit on the couch and wait. I’m a little worried but when he’s a half hour late, which is absolutely unlike him.
Then I call him and get no answer. I wait another five minutes and still nothing. But when I tried calling him a third time, he sends me to voicemail. Sitting there, I’m stunned. But I never heard from him after he had the guy’s night last night and I just came home and went to sleep.
What the hell happened?
I pick up my phone and call Jana.
‘I hate to ask, but I need a ride up to Cash’s. He was supposed to pick me up, but he’s really late and that’s not like him. I want to make sure that he’s okay.’ I tell her as soon as she picks up the phone.
‘Unfortunately, I’m so damn hungover I couldn’t drive if I wanted to. After I got home, Alex came over and we had more than a little bit to drink. But you’re welcome to take my car.’
‘I’m on my way. Be there in a few minutes.’
I hoist my overnight bag over my shoulder and start the short walk to downtown and on to the grocery store. Jana lives above the cafe that is attached to the grocery store and I know that her car is in the back parking lot. The most she uses it is when she goes to visit Alex since she can just walk downstairs for work.
When I get to her place, I only get one knock before she’s opening the door, glaring at me and handing me the keys.
‘This is way too early. You need to learn how to sleep in,’ she grumbles. Then she closes the door.
Normally I’d stay and argue the fact that it’s already eight a.m. but I know she’s not a morning person I really am a bit worried about Cash, so I want to get up the mountain and make sure he’s okay as soon as possible.
As concerned as I am about him, I still take my time heading up the mountain because I don’t know it very well and heights are not my strong suits. There are many scary drop offs along the way. But I’ve been to Cash’s enough now that I know how to get there.
I breathe a sigh of relief as I start climbing up his driveway. When I reach the top, his truck is there, so I know he’s at least here. Parking the car, I take a step out, looking around for any sign of him.
No sooner than I close my car door, do I hear a loud crash coming from the barn where he keeps the animals. I take off running in that direction.
‘Cash!’ I call out as I walk into the barn.
He steps out of one of the stalls in the back and just looks at me.
‘What are you doing here?’ He asks like he’s annoyed that I’m there.
‘We had a date today, and you didn’t show up to pick me up,’ I say.
While I wait for an explanation, he looks down at the ground before turning his back to me, placing whatever was in his hands down and then turning around.
‘How did you get here?’
‘Jana let me borrow her car. Now are you going to tell me what’s wrong or do I need to start guessing because I have all day and no intention of going anywhere.’
He looks at me and then stomps past me and out of the barn.
I know something’s bothering him, but I have no idea what, and I have no idea where to even start guessing about what happened or what is wrong. The last time we talked was when we got to Alex’s place, and everything was fine. I left with Jana and then the next thing I know Cash and I seem to be fighting.
‘You’re pushing me to be normal and that’s just not who I am. I’m happy with who I am. Yes, I’m not normal by most standards and I don’t fit it in town, but I really don’t care. If you care so much, that’s your problem.’ He then stomps off towards his cabin and I stand there shocked.
How the hell am I pushing him to be normal? What the hell happened with the guys yesterday? I turn and follow him to his cabin. Even though I have to run to catch up with him, I get there just before the screen door slams behind him and follow him inside.
‘Whoa! Let’s sit down and talk because obviously something happened, and I am completely lost.’
He stops with his back towards me, but finally he nods and moves towards the living room. I follow him and sit down on the opposite end of the couch from him, giving him some space that he seems to need right now.
‘I don’t know what a normal guy might be like, but if it’s anything like what I experience yesterday, I have absolutely no interest in being part of it,’ he says. Though he still won’t meet my eyes.
‘What happened?’ I ask again, much more softly this time.
‘They were nice about teaching me baseball, but during the commercial breaks all they did was bitch and moan and complain about their girlfriends. Jana’s boyfriend was the worst. When I asked them why they were even with the girls at all, they said for the sex.’
I always knew Jana’s boyfriend was kind of a jerk, but I thought maybe that’s just how he was with other people. Sort of like Axel. How he isn’t very friendly with other people, but he treats Emelie like gold.
‘What exactly did Alex say to you?’
Cash looks extremely uncomfortable and still won’t meet my eyes.
‘He complained about spending time with her family. How long of a drive it was and how she wanted to hang around with them every weekend and how with it being such a long drive, she wouldn’t even give him road head.’
When he says that, Cash’s cheeks flush the most beautiful shade of pink. I know I shouldn’t take joy in his embarrassment, but I really do love this very innocent side of him. But then I snap back to the reality of what he just said.
‘That’s not okay. If you’re constantly complaining about someone, I don’t believe that you are meant to be with each other. The girls were pretty much doing the same thing. I hated it too. Only, I didn’t have a ride out of there until later.
But I don’t ever want you to be normal. I like you just the way you are and I’m sorry if I ever made you feel like I didn’t.’
‘I walked out before the game was even half over, I just couldn’t sit there and let then keep complaining and saying they’re only with their girls for sex. Personally, I can’t imagine having sex with someone I don’t love. It’s just too intimate.’
Sitting there, it takes me a moment to realize what it he just said and what it means.
‘You love me?’ I ask, shocked.
When his eyes finally meet mine, there’s raw vulnerability, which makes my heart ache. Never would I ever want to change this part of him.
‘Yes, very much,’ he says.
Then he scoots closer to me on the couch.
Even though I care deeply for Cash, I won’t deny my feelings, I have to be honest with him.
‘My feelings for you are very strong. But I can’t say those words yet. After watching my mom throw the word out to manipulate guys and get what she wanted I just… I have to be sure.”
He nods and moves even closer until he’s right beside me.
‘I get it.’ He says it like he knew that was going to be my answer all along. Before I even have time to think or respond again, his lips are on mine.
Unlike any kiss that we’ve shared before, this one feels like he’s saying I’m sorry for the way I acted and I love you. And doing it all in one kiss. It’s effective in making me forget anything that we were talking about or that I was about to say, and all that exists is this moment. His lips on mine, his hands on my hips pulling me into his lap and his hard cock against my hip, this I will remember.
‘I’m sorry I wasn’t there to pick you up. I’ve been fighting with myself all night on what to say to you and how to say it,’ he tells me.
Then he leans me back on the couch and climbs on top of me.
‘If you let me, I’ll make it up to you,’ he says, kissing down between my breasts.
‘I think you have a lot of making up to do. But I don’t know if you’ll be able to make it up to me today.’
‘Well, I plan on trying. Maybe I just won’t let you go home until I do.’
‘Well then, I guess it’s a good thing I packed an overnight bag, huh?’
‘Next time you should pack a bag of stuff to leave here so you’re not having to pack a bag every time.”
It isn’t until after he spends hours thoroughly making love to me and giving attention to every inch of my body that I realize Cash nonchalantly just asked me to move in with him. Well, at least part time. Having stuff at his place is a huge step and one that surprisingly, I’m ready to take.
