I waited until noon the next day before I knocked on Tristan’s door. I could feel Sara inside the apartment and knew she’d stayed there all night. I hadn’t seen Tristan yet today, so I had no idea how their talk had gone or how she’d reacted to the news about the bond. I couldn’t forget how lost she’d looked when she arrived here last night. I needed to make sure she was okay.
Tristan didn’t look surprised to see me when he opened the door. “She’s still asleep,” he said quietly as he motioned for me to come in.
“Still?”
His brow creased in concern. “I don’t think she slept well. I heard her moving around for a long time after she went to bed.”
I hadn’t slept well either. My apartment was two doors down from Tristan’s, close enough for me to feel Sara nearby. Not being able to go to her had me prowling around the apartment like a caged tiger all night.
“I’ll come back in an hour.”
He shook his head and gave me a regretful look. “She is not ready to see you. Last night was a shock to her, and she needs some time to process it.”
His words didn’t come as a surprise, but they hurt.
“I frightened her. I need to talk to her, to explain.”
“Sara knows you would never harm her, and she’s the only one who wasn’t afraid of you last night. You and I both knew she would be upset when she learned about the bond, which is why we agreed to wait to tell her.”
I threw up a hand. “I did wait. I left for almost three weeks.”
He raised an eyebrow. “When you returned and asked to train her, you said you could keep your distance. Kissing her is not what I’d call keeping your distance.”
“I didn’t mean for that to happen…not yet.” I raked my fingers through my hair. “We argued, and we got caught up in the moment. I’m sorry for the way I handled it, but I’m not sorry for kissing her. I came home last night, intending to tell her everything.”
His sympathetic look was worse than his anger. I wanted to ask him about their conversation, but all I said was, “How is she?”
“Like I said, it was a lot for her to take in, and she’s hurt that we kept it from her. Give her a few days.”
“I’ll give her whatever she needs. You know that.”
“I do.” Tristan glanced over at the guest room door. “I think she knows it too.”
I turned to the door. “I’d better leave before she wakes. I’ll be working with Dax today if you need me.”
I didn’t know if anything could take my mind off Sara, but I had to try. I had a feeling I was going to be a very busy man until she was ready to talk to me again.
Dax and I spent the afternoon going through the constant stream of reports from our people all over the country. I was grateful for the distraction, but the higher than usual number of vampire attacks was troubling. I scoured the feeds for missing teenage girls, or anything that might indicate the Master was still searching for Sara. I found nothing that pointed to her, but I wouldn’t be happy until that vampire was dead.
If Dax wondered about my extended presence in the security center, he didn’t say anything. Neither did he mention what had happened last night, though I was sure everyone at Westhorne had heard the story by now. Gossip didn’t bother me. Neither did stares. My only concern was Sara, and how she was handling everything. Since I couldn’t go to her, I buried myself in work.
Tristan came looking for me late in the afternoon, and we walked outside to talk.
“How is she?” I asked.
“Good. Better than last night, but still a bit shaken up. She said some things that you need to know.”
My gut hardened at his serious expression, but his next words were the last ones I expected.
“Sara told me she can sense when vampires are near. It’s how she knew there were vampires at the party last night.”
I was sure I had heard him wrong. “Sense them?”
“She gets a cold feeling in her chest. Apparently, her sylph friend came to visit her a few days ago, and the sylph thinks it’s because of the vampire blood on the knife Sara was stabbed with. It does make sense that Sara’s Fae side would react differently to demon blood.”
I didn’t hide my shock. “You’re serious.”
He nodded grimly. “That’s not all. She said she’s sensed vampires three times since she moved here, but she didn’t know what was happening until last night.”
I frowned. “That’s impossible. There is no way vampires could have gotten close to her here.”
Tristan shrugged, but didn’t look convinced. “She sensed one out in the woods and one near the theater in Boise. It’s not inconceivable for there to be vampires in Boise, so I asked Chris to look into it. I would have said none would come near this place before last night. Now, I’m wondering if Sara was right. I’m adding an extra patrol to tighten security.”
“Khristu. If she’s right…”
“It doesn’t mean they know she’s here. Those could have been coincidences.”
We stopped walking at the edge of the trees, and I faced him. “I don’t believe in coincidences when it comes to Sara.”
He let out a slow breath. “There’s more.”
I steeled myself. “Tell me.”
“Sara used her Fae power on one of the vampires last night. It wasn’t enough to kill him, but it incapacitated him long enough for her to finish him off with a knife.” Tristan stared at me. “Why don’t you look surprised?”
“Because she and I spent some time working on that a few days ago. I think, with practice, she’ll be able to call on her magic whenever she wants.”
Tristan nodded thoughtfully. “It could be a powerful weapon against vampires if her Fae magic gets stronger.”
“It’s already helped save her life.” I stared across the wide expanse of lawn, my mind working. “She doesn’t like to use her power on me, so I’ll need to figure out the best course of training for…”
I trailed off at his unhappy expression. “What?”
He took a deep breath. “Sara asked to train with Callum again.”
“No.”
“Maybe we should –”
“I’m her trainer.” The thought of her wanting to work with someone else made my stomach harden. “Callum doesn’t understand her. He has no idea what she is.”
“I know, and I told her you were the best trainer for her. But if she’s not comfortable working with you, I have to respect her wishes.”
“She didn’t want to work with me when I first offered, and you had no issue with it then.”
He knew as well as I that no one cared more about her training than I did. No one could reach her like I could.
“That was before she knew everything.” Tristan ran a hand through his hair. “I have to ask that you step back and let this blow over.”
My jaw clenched. “We’re bonded, Tristan. This is not going to blow over.”
He rubbed his eyes. “I’m sorry. That came out wrong. I’m in a difficult position here, Nikolas. I don’t want to upset you, but Sara is my granddaughter. I know I said I wouldn’t come between you, but I feel I have to intercede this time. Sara will train with Callum…for now.”
His phone rang, and he looked down at the screen with a weary sigh. “Council business. I can call them back later if you want to talk.”
“I don’t think talking will resolve anything,” I said brusquely, suddenly overcome with the need to get out of there for a few hours.
“Where are you going?” Tristan asked as I turned to the garage.
“Out.”
I rode for hours, covering every back road and highway within fifty miles. As much as I needed the freedom of the road, I couldn’t bring myself to go too far from Sara. It still amazed me how much my life had changed since I met her. Not so long ago, I couldn’t conceive the idea of me wanting to stay at Westhorne for longer than a week at a time. Or the thought that my life could revolve around one person whose happiness meant more to me than my own.
It was close to midnight when I got back to the stronghold. The building was quiet as I headed for my apartment. I slowed walking past Tristan’s door, but I knew immediately Sara was no longer there. I wasn’t sure if it was a good or bad thing, not being able to feel her nearby.
An hour later, I gave up on sleep. Pushing aside my bed covers. I donned a T-shirt and sweats, grabbed my phone, and went to sit on the couch. My long ride hadn’t brought me answers as I’d hoped it would, but there was one place I could always turn to for guidance. If there ever was a time I needed my parents’ wisdom, it was now.
My sire answered the video call after three rings. It was morning there, and he usually spent the first part of his day in his home office.
“Nikolas, we were not expecting a call from you for another week.”
“I know. Did I catch you at a bad time?”
He settled back in his chair. “It’s never a bad time to talk to you. I was just catching up on some reports, and I could use a break.” He glanced down at the corner of the computer screen and frowned. “It’s quite late there. Is everything okay with you?”
“I’m well,” I assured him. As well as I could be under the circumstances.
“But something is bothering you. I can tell.”
I didn’t answer, suddenly unsure of how to tell him the reason for my call. For months, I’d kept the true nature of my relationship with Sara a secret from my parents. Now I was not only going to tell them about the bond, but I had to admit how badly I’d messed things up.
“Mikhail, I think we should –” My mother entered the room behind my sire and came up short, a smile lighting up her face. “Nikolas!”
“Hello, Mama.”
She pulled up a chair and sat beside my sire, who laid an arm across her shoulders. Her eyes studied my face with a mother’s scrutiny.
“You look tired…and troubled. What’s wrong?”
I let out a slow breath. “I need to tell you both something and to ask for your advice.”
Her brow furrowed. “It must be serious for you to call so early.”
“It is.” I searched for the right words, but there was no way to tell them my news that wouldn’t shock them.
“I’ve bonded with someone.”
My sire stared at me.
My mother’s hand went to her mouth, and her eyes welled with tears. “Bonded?” she whispered.
“Yes.”
I’d expected her to be emotional at the news, but I wasn’t prepared when she dissolved into tears. I watched helplessly as my sire pulled her into his arms and rubbed her back.
“Our son has a mate,” she sobbed against his chest.
“Yes, my love,” he said tenderly.
A few minutes passed before she pulled away from him and patted her eyes dry. Her smile was radiant when she faced me again.
“I’m so happy for you. Who is she? Do we know her?”
“Her name is Sara, and she is –”
“Sara?” My mother straightened up in her chair. “Tristan’s granddaughter?”
“Yes.” I wasn’t surprised she made the connection so fast. Tristan must talk about Sara all the time.
“She’s the orphan you found in Maine,” my sire said slowly. “But that was several months ago.”
“She is not yet eighteen. She must have been too young to bond then,” my mother told him. “To think, the orphan Nikolas saved would turn out to be his mate.”
“That’s not how it happened,” I said, earning confused looks from both of them. “We bonded the night I met her.”
“You’ve been bonded for months…and you are just telling us now? Why, Nikolas?” my mother asked in quiet disappointment.
“It’s a long story.”
She reached for my sire’s hand. “Tell us.”
I started at the night Chris and I went to the Attic, describing how I met Sara and recognized her as a potential mate. I told them about the weeks in Maine, and my frustration over her refusal to leave despite the danger to her. How the bond had grown between us even though Sara hadn’t known about it. How it felt like my heart had been torn from my chest when she disappeared and everyone but me had believed she was dead.
“Oh, Nikolas.” My mother’s eyes misted again. “Why did you not say anything?”
“I don’t know. At first, I thought about walking away from the bond.”
My mother gasped softly, and I smiled. “You know I never wanted a serious relationship. But it wasn’t long before I couldn’t leave.”
My sire nodded. “When you find the one, your heart knows before your head does.”
“So Sara is half Fae, and that is why she can’t feel the bond?” my mother asked.
“She uses her Fae magic to suppress her Mori. We’ve been working on it, and she’s made some progress in the last few weeks.”
“Incredible.”
“It was hard for her to leave her home to come to Westhorne, so Tristan and I decided to let her settle in here before I told her the truth about us.”
My mother held up a hand. “She still doesn’t know about the bond? But it’s been months. You should be showing all the signs of a bonded male. How have you hidden that from her?”
“It hasn’t been easy.” I dragged a hand through my hair. “She found out last night…and it didn’t go as I’d hoped.”
My sire leaned forward. “What happened?”
“We had a misunderstanding a few days ago. It was my fault. I left on a job, and I came back last night, planning to tell her everything. And I…” Shame filled me, and I couldn’t meet their eyes. “Something happened, and I thought she was hurt.”
“You went into a rage.” My sire’s voice was full of understanding.
“She was at a party in town with the other trainees, and they were attacked by young vampires. Sara and another girl killed the vampires before anyone could reach them. I got there after Tristan, and all I could see was Sara covered in blood. I lost it.”
“Did you hurt anyone?” my mother asked gently.
I met her eyes again. “No. Sara brought me out of it. But she was upset, and she wanted to know why I’d been like that. Tristan took her home and explained the bond to her. Now she doesn’t want to see me. I’ve made such a mess of things.”
She shook her head. “I’m sure there are things you could have handled better, but I haven’t met a bonded male who hasn’t behaved irrationally at least one time. It’s the nature of the bond.”
My sire chuckled. “I wasn’t exactly a model of good behavior when I met your mother. I’m still amazed she didn’t put me on my ass and run like hell.”
“I was tempted a time or two.” She arched an eyebrow at him. “But you had some redeeming qualities.”
I looked from my mother to my sire. “I thought you had a smooth courtship.”
My parents had met in the Australian Outback in seventeen eighty-nine. She’d been on an expedition to study the weerlak population there, and he was with the unit sent to back them up. They mated less than two months later.
The two of them laughed.
“I knew the moment I met Mikhail he was the one, but I refused to have anything to do with him at first. He thought the expedition was too dangerous for me, as if I wasn’t a trained warrior. I told him to go away and come back when he was ready to see me as an equal.”
“I stayed, of course,” my sire added, laughing. “I was determined to keep my mate safe. All I did was entertain my unit and the expedition members. The more I pressed, the more Irina resisted. It took me a while to learn that pushing her was getting us nowhere.”
She leaned over to kiss his cheek. “And I’m so glad you figured that out, my love.”
“How is it that you’ve never told me this?”
It was somewhat comforting to know that even my devoted parents’ relationship had started out rocky, although maybe not as rocky as mine and Sara’s.
My mother lifted a shoulder. “It didn’t seem important. Once you complete the bond, none of that matters.”
“I have no idea what Sara feels about us or if she even wants this bond. Tristan said she’s hurt that I didn’t tell her, and I don’t blame her.”
I rubbed my chest where a familiar ache had started up again. “She won’t see me, and she’s asked to train with someone else. The last thing I want is to pressure her, but how can I fix this if I can’t talk to her?”
“Sara’s had many changes in her life these last few months, and from what you told us, she’s resisted most of them,” my mother said. “But you’ve been there for her through all of them, and it sounds like she cares for you. Be there for her now, and give her time to work out her feelings.”
“Don’t push her to talk about your relationship, because that’s the surest way to send her running,” my sire added. “But let her know you aren’t going anywhere. Sometimes, a woman just needs to know that.”
“Mikhail’s right. Just be patient. Sara will talk to you when she is ready.”
“I can do that.”
“I know you can. Now go get some sleep.” My mother smiled. “And, Nikolas, I can’t wait to meet my new daughter.”
* * *
The door to the training room was closed when I approached it, but I knew Sara was already inside. I’d talked to Callum earlier, and he’d agreed I was a better trainer for her. I decided it was best not to tell her about the change in trainers because I didn’t want her finding a way to get out of it.
She needed me as a trainer, even if she didn’t want to admit it. If she went back to working with Callum, it would be a step backward for her. She had only just begun to connect with her Mori and to tap into her power, and Callum couldn’t help her with those things. I just had to convince her I was right.
Her back was to the door when I opened it. I hadn’t seen her since Saturday night, and I hadn’t realized how much I’d missed her until this moment.
Her smile faded when she saw it was me. “I’m waiting for Callum.”
I shifted into trainer mode as I shut the door. “Callum and I talked, and we agreed that I will continue to train you.”
“I didn’t agree to that. I’d rather work with –”
I took a step toward her, and she backed up. Her physical withdrawal was like a punch in the gut.
“Don’t do that,” I said quietly. “I would never hurt you.”
“I know. I just think it would be best if I trained with some other people.”
“No one here can teach you anything I can’t.” I saw in her eyes that she knew I was right. But that didn’t stop her from shifting nervously from one foot to the other. I hated to see her like this, and my resolve slipped. “We both know what this is about.”
She looked away from me. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“We have to talk about it sometime,” I said gently.
“But not now. Please.”
Her pleading tone made my chest tighten, and I backed off. “Let’s train then.”
“Okay.”
Her relief was apparent, and I tried not to let it bother me. At least she hadn’t refused outright to train with me.
“What do you want to work on?” I asked her.
A gleam entered her eyes. “I want you to teach me how to fight. I can have all the demon strength I want, but it’s totally useless if I don’t even know how to throw a punch correctly.”
I started to object, to tell her she wasn’t ready for combat training, but she spoke before I could.
“Listen, I have to learn to protect myself. I’m supposed to train to be a warrior, right?” A flush rose in her cheeks. “If you’re going to get mad every time I mention it, this is not going to work. I’d rather not waste my time.”
“You need to condition your body and spend more time getting used to working with your demon before you learn fighting techniques.”
“Can’t I do both?” she asked hopefully. “The bad guys aren’t going to wait for me to catch up with everyone else. Couldn’t I learn some moves and do that other stuff at the same time?”
The image of her emerging from the barn covered in blood filled my mind.
“See, there you go again.” She glared at me. “Callum wouldn’t think twice about teaching me to fight. He’d have no problem giving me a few bruises and throwing me across a room.”
“He throws you around?” I asked darkly.
“Gah!” She moved past me toward the door. If she left, it would be even harder to get her to work with me again.
“I’ll teach you a few strikes and blocks, and then we will put you through a workout to see how much work we have to do.”
She stopped and gave me a look of surprise.
“We’ll spend time on your fighting technique and your workouts every day. Once you have mastered the basics, we’ll move on to more difficult moves.”
I had her full attention now. Suppressing a smile, I went to the center of the room and pointed at a spot in front of me. After a brief hesitation, she joined me.
All right, moy malen’kiy voin. Let’s see what you’re made of.
Two hours later, I watched her lean shakily against the wall, her breath coming in quick pants, and her hair damp with sweat. I’d put her through a grueling workout to see how long she’d last, one that would have knocked any trainee on their ass, but she stubbornly refused to give in.
I hung her discarded skipping rope on a hook to hide my smile. “Ready to call it quits for today?”
“No, just catching my breath,” she replied in a voice that trembled with exhaustion. “What’s next?”
Admiration filled me. She could barely stand, yet she would push on rather than admit she was tired.
I began stacking the weights we’d used. “I think that’s enough for now. You don’t want to overdo it in your first session.”
“Okay,” she said weakly, failing to hide the relief in her voice.
I grinned at the wall. “Tomorrow we’ll start working with the bag.”
“Yay,” she muttered.
I waited until the door closed, and then I laughed for the first time in days.
* * *
Sara returned for training the next day, which told me she’d given up the idea of going back to working with Callum. She’d been okay yesterday once we got into the workout, so I kept the training as businesslike as possible to prevent any discomfort for her. It worked, and we had a good session.
The day after that, she opened up to me about her fight with the vampires.
“I zapped a vampire at the barn.”
I set down the weights I was holding and turned to her, waiting for her to say more.
“Tristan told you?” she asked.
“Yes.”
She bit her lip. “Why didn’t you say something?”
I leaned against the wall. “I figured you would tell me when you were ready, and when you felt like you could trust me again.”
Her eyes met mine. “I never stopped trusting you.”
The weight on my chest eased a little at her earnest declaration. Knowing I hadn’t lost her trust gave me hope, and it was a step toward regaining what I’d had with her. I would not push her for more than that. Instead, I turned the conversation back to a more neutral subject.
“Do you want to tell me what happened? Tristan said you were able to sense them.”
She nodded. “Derek was showing us the loft because he’s turning it into an art studio. We were about to go back to the house when I got this cold feeling in my chest. I’ve felt it before, but never that bad. I could barely breathe. Then Derek’s friend Seth showed up. I didn’t know he was a vampire, not until I saw his claws growing. It got kind of crazy after that. Derek got knocked out, and Jordan killed Seth.”
She rubbed her breastbone absently. “And then I felt the cold again. That’s when I realized what it meant.”
“What happened next?”
“Seth’s girlfriend Dana showed up with another vampire. Jordan took Dana, and I took the other one. I fought him with my knife until I lost it. Then I jumped on his back to hold him so Jordan could finish him off. But when my hands touched his face, my power shocked him. He fell down, and I used a knife to kill him.”
She gave me a frustrated look. “I tried to call on the power like we practiced, but it wouldn’t come until I touched him. Then it just jumped out of me like it did with the other demons. I don’t understand why it burned him, but it didn’t burn you.”
“A vamhir demon is always close to the surface because it controls the body. You couldn’t feel my demon until I called it forth.”
I was proud of her, but it was hard to move past the thought of her being so close to a vampire, especially after Eli. But a trainer wouldn’t dwell on those things, and that was all I could be to her until she was ready for more.
“This is good. It means you have a built-in defense against vampires, young ones at least. We need to keep working on it to make sure it is reliable.”
“What about my vampire radar?” she asked hopefully. “Can we go somewhere and test it?”
“Not until we spend a lot more time on your training. There will be plenty of time to test your other abilities.”
“Okay,” she conceded. “When can we work on my power again?”
I picked up a jump rope, pleased she wanted to work with me. “Let’s finish your workout and we’ll meet up after lunch for your other training.”
Our days took on a routine after that. We did physical training in the mornings, and after lunch we focused on improving her control over her power. With each day that passed, her combat moves grew more precise and she seemed less tired at the end of our workouts.
It was her progress with her Fae power that impressed me the most. I didn’t know if her power was growing stronger or if she was getting better at wielding it, but it was clear where her real strength lay. I was torn between wanting to see what she could do against a real threat and hoping she never had to use it to protect herself again.
Although Sara and I spent our mornings and afternoons together, we never talked about anything besides her training. And we didn’t see each other outside of training, except in passing. It was like a wall had been erected between us and we grew further apart each day.
My mother called every other day to see how I was doing. Every time we talked, she reminded me the strongest matings usually started out rocky and that Sara would come around if I continued to be patient. I appreciated her advice, and I didn’t press Sara, but it felt like Sara was slowly slipping away from me.
It was clear Sara wasn’t happy either. When I saw her with her friends, her smiles weren’t as bright and she didn’t laugh. I hoped Nate’s upcoming visit would cheer her up. I even considered inviting Roland and Peter here to spend time with her. I’d do whatever it took to make her happy.
On Saturday evening, I left the security center, and I was headed for the dining hall when I heard laughter ahead of me. I slowed my approach and watched Sara and Chris walk through the main hall, their arms laden with shopping bags. Chris carried a bucket of cat litter in one hand and a piece of cat furniture in the other. He said something to Sara, and she grinned at him, looking happy for the first time in a week.
I waited for them to go up the stairs to her room before I continued on to the dining hall. I was glad to find it almost empty because I wasn’t in the mood for company. I grabbed a plate of food and sat alone, trying not to think about how it should have been me to take Sara to town. It should have been me to make her smile like that.
I was so lost in thought that I didn’t realize someone had entered the dining hall until I heard a sound on the other side of the room. I groaned inwardly when I recognized Celine, who was taking several bottles of Perrier from one of the glass refrigerators. I hadn’t talked to her since I got back last weekend, and I assumed she was keeping a polite distance like everyone else.
I didn’t think she had spotted me yet, but she would as soon as she turned around. And then…
“Nikolas, why are you sitting in here alone?”
I sighed and put on a smile. “Got caught up in work. You know how it is.”
She was quiet for a moment before she walked over to my table. For once, the sultry expression was gone, replaced by one of concern.
“I heard what happened. How are you?”
“I’m good. Thanks for asking.”
“Do you mind if I join you?” she asked almost demurely.
I waved a hand at the chair across from me. “Not at all.”
She set her bottles down on the table and sat with her hands on her lap. This reserved Celine was one I hadn’t seen before, and I wasn’t sure what to make of it.
“I feel I should apologize to you.”
I gave her a puzzled look. “Why?”
Her brows drew together delicately. “If I’d known you were bonded, I would not have pursued you since you came home.”
I started to speak, but she held up a hand.
“Please, let me finish. You know I’ve been attracted to you since our week in New York. I’ve never exactly hidden my desire to resume a relationship with you.”
I smiled, unsure how to respond.
“But had I known you were bonded, I wouldn’t have come on so strong. You’ve been very gracious about my advances, and I want to apologize for any discomfort I caused you.”
“You don’t have to apologize. You couldn’t have known, and this hasn’t exactly been a normal bonding.”
Celine reached across the table. Then she seemed to think better of it and withdrew her hand. “Are you okay? Forgive me for intruding, but you don’t look happy.”
“No one ever said bonding was easy.”
“I suppose not, but I don’t think you’re supposed to be miserable either.”
I shrugged. “I’m more worried about her happiness. This hasn’t been easy on her.”
Celine’s mouth pursed. “She is unusually young to be bonded. Perhaps too young to deal with this.”
I nodded absently because I had worried about the same thing more than once in the last week.
She stood and picked up her bottles of water. “I do care about you, Nikolas, and I only want you to be happy.”
“Thank you. I wish the same for you.”
Her flirty smile was back as she walked away. “I’m suffering a disappointment at the moment, but I’m sure I’ll rebound in no time.”
“I’m sure you will,” I called after her.
